Wilderness Untamed

by Butler, J. M.

  AaQar finished securing one of the torches. Relief softened his features. "You cut that close."

  "We still had a few minutes." He guided Amelia around a small pile of rocks and to the sitting area. Someone had already put out the furs and hides they'd prepared after their hunting. "Do you want to sit or lie down?"

  "I'm wrapping myself around the next cold thing I find," she said.

  He guided her to the pile of furs and hides. She practically collapsed on it and then curled against the wall, her forehead pressed to the cold damp stone wall.

  "It'll pass soon, veskaro." He sat beside her and placed his hand on her shoulder. "It's almost over." Everything was going to be all right.

  58

  Time

  Most of the events of the past days blurred together in her mind, becoming a long and painful series of hazy images and deep impressions. As Amelia slept, her dreams were likewise fragmented. At points she stirred, found another cool place on the stone, and drifted back into nothingness.

  Eventually, the pain stopped and the pressure broke. When she opened her eyes, they were mostly better, the image still somewhat hazy but not painful.

  Where was she?

  What was on her?

  She blinked, reached up to rub her eyes, then paused.

  It was an uneven stone room with a floor that tilted toward her. Proteus lay directly across from her, his long head resting on his large paws as his sides rose and fell with the gentle stirring of his snores. Two torches provided light. There was no fire, a good thing considering what fires could do to the air supply in a cave if they were too large. And the weight on her hip was Naatos.

  He'd fallen asleep next to her, as if he'd been sitting and then slid, his head in the dip of her waist.

  Everyone else was sleeping close as well. Most of the hides and furs had been piled into a makeshift communal bed. Tacky slept on QueQoa's chest, purring happily. They'd all escaped the storm. Somehow.

  She rubbed her temple, recalling the intense pain. How she'd made it here, she wasn't sure. But if more storms like that awaited them… she shuddered.

  Perhaps it was best not to think of that now. The air had a much crisper note to it, cool enough to make her skin prickle. The storm must have passed. Maybe she'd just walk a bit. Carefully, she pushed Naatos back and guided his head to a thicker portion of the hides.

  He caught hold of her arm. "Where are you going?" he murmured.

  "I'm just moving."

  He grunted but pulled her around so that she was back in his arms, not even cracking his eyelids. "Just sleep." He pulled a blanket over them both.

  She tapped his nose. "Are you even awake?"

  He put his hand over her mouth and shook his head. "No talking. Only sleeping."

  Resting her head on his chest, she sighed. His arm had immediately curled around her. This was good. The odd and easy contentment that flowed from him was contagious. She slid into it as easily as the blanket had slid over her.

  Dreamless sleep caught her once more. Her last awareness was of her fingers trailing down his cheek to his jaw.

  When she woke, she lay on her stomach, the blankets wrapped around her and tucked over her feet. Everyone was gone from the bed.

  "Good to see you awake," AaQar said.

  She sat up. He was sitting on one of the smoother rocks nearest the torch, tablet in hand. He swiped his finger over the pad easily, the soft blue light of the tra casting a small warm halo on the wall behind him. "What are you working on?"

  "Trying to determine our timeline. QueQoa is correct. The aura storm was not the first sign we should have received of the Grey Season."

  She nodded though her thoughts fluttered around an odd sensation within her chest and mind. Something had changed. "Could any of the rain we encountered be the rain storm?"

  "No. Those were little more than showers. Far too mild. The rain storms that precede the Grey Season build up until they are like typhoons and hurricanes. But hail is common in the early ones. This aura storm, well, it came on significantly faster, and it carried hail and rain. The acid was much lower this time as well, one of the few things better for us. Cyclones touched down in several places. A few trees were struck by lightning, and at least one portion of the mountain."

  "So not what you thought it would be?" She pressed her fingers along her collarbone and then her breastbone, then realized that the sensation was in her stomach as well. All over really. Something had changed. It felt as if a piece had snapped into place.

  "Not at all." AaQar clicked his tongue as he released a long low sigh. "If I didn't know better, I would say that someone has been altering this. For what point and purpose who is to say? The one mercy is that the storm passed swiftly. We may have to wait until the next one to gather more information. We will at least be near the mountains with the proper composition for a good long while so, as long as it doesn't jump to some other part of the cycle, we won't have to make such a mad dash."

  She nodded once more.

  Where was Naatos?

  Just thinking his name made her insides leap and her stomach twist with anticipation.

  "If you want to get cleaned up or bathe, there is a river in the next chamber. A small one. We've explored this cave thoroughly and blocked up any places where something other than air might get through. I don't recommend that you walk into the water though. It isn't particularly deep, but it is almost as cold as ice. Other than that, you have nothing to fear."

  "That's all right. I just want to get clean."

  She gathered up what she needed and padded into the separate chamber. It was slightly larger, but the one torch present provided enough light to reveal the full room with its chuckling river that rushed and flowed from one narrow crevice into a pool that emptied through a narrow series of holes and cracks.

  It was quieter here, cool and calm. In the stillness, the pieces came together.

  Yes.

  She breathed with relief. Of course that's what it was. That was what had changed!

  It was time.

  She was ready.

  Putting into words what had changed was impossible, but it could no longer be denied. It wasn't simply arousal or need. That was there. But deeper, deeper, deeper there was a clarity and a surety. She didn't simply want to bathe because she hated the feeling of dried sweat or because she wanted to wash away the stench of the run and the storm. No. She wanted to prepare to share herself with her husband, her veskare.

  Despite being every bit as cold as AaQar had warned, the water was cleansing. And as she washed her hair and body, she worked through her plans of what came next.

  If she and Naatos were going to vestov, then she needed to know she could trust him not to become her enemy again and they needed a place away from the others. Vawtrians might not worry about privacy, but she did.

  As she combed through her hair, she walked along the length of the room. There was a slightly smaller chamber that was accessible though unlit. Almost a room. If she moved some of the extra hides and furs in here, she could make a bed of sorts. She could even put up a hide to form a curtain or door of sorts.

  The anticipation bubbled inside her, fizzing and sparking. Her skin was already becoming increasingly sensitive, her blood moving faster. She put on the yellow dress, then applied the eyeliner with exaggerated wings and partially along the lower lid. Jacinda had once told her that when she did that it made her eyes utterly hypnotic and took them from ordinary to extraordinary.

  This little addition took the last of the eyeliner. Though she could have tossed the bottle out with the rest of the refuse, she slipped it back into her satchel.

  AaQar still worked on the tablet, his brow furrowed as he added notes. He moved with disarming speed; she almost hated to interrupt him, but he looked up as soon as she returned to the main room. His eyebrow raised as he scanned her.

  She cleared her throat and lifted her shoulders, her voice revealing more of her nerves than she intended. "Is there any reas
on that I shouldn't use the little room on the far side of the river here?"

  "No. It's secure. Did you want to use it for something particular?"

  "I'd like privacy. Which, would it be all right if I took a few of the extra hides and furs to make a—" Heat flashed through her, and her cheeks burned in a way that was entirely unsubtle. At least it complimented the yellow of her dress.

  "A bed?" AaQar guessed.

  She nodded.

  He gestured to the floor and then the packs. "Take whatever you need or want." A faint smile tugged at his lips. "Naatos will be back soon I imagine. But I can send him a signal—"

  "No, no." She shook her head as she picked up a few of the hides. "I need to finish this."

  "He really won't care."

  "It's our first time. I want it to be special."

  "The fact that it's happening at all will be more than enough." He paused. "Are you still going to ask him for a vestov vow?"

  Hugging the hides to her chest, she nodded. "I've been thinking about how to phrase it. I just—I can't let some things go, and I feel like if I don't do this, I'm just putting the grief and sorrow off until later. You don't think I should?"

  "I think you are putting a great deal of effort into this, and you want it to be special. When I was in a similar place with Rasha, I wanted only to focus on being with her. All other matters were so unimportant it was laughable. Focus on the now, little sister. Let the rest sort itself out when it comes time. You both have made significant progress with one another. And we are some time getting off this world, if it ever happens. You don't have to have everything figured out now."

  "I'll think about it." She chewed on her lip as she contemplated this. She did want to be with Naatos. It was almost as loud in her mind as the migraine had been except infinitely more pleasant. Could she just let it go? She spread the hides out and made the best bed that she could.

  Moving to set up a curtain, she realized that it was actually a fear that held her back. A dull fear that refused to be silenced was that she herself had changed. And quite a lot. Her feelings for him—for all of them—had changed her. What had happened in Libysha was abominable. Love didn't change that. But could it further dull her to the point that she no longer cared? That her entire world would collapse to only him and what he wanted?

  Right now, she had the willpower, the strength, and the mind. Barely. Would it really get any easier if she had to oppose him? Or was it possible that it would never come up again? Out here he was more or less wonderful. And as much as he pretended to hate the word, he really could be sweet. Maybe she could trust him. Maybe.

  It took a little effort to wedge the hide in sufficiently to form a curtain. There was a gap at the top and bottom, but not enough that anyone could see in unless they were trying. After AaQar confirmed they were using rels, she slipped out to gather flowers and some branches from a pine tree and arranged all of these in the small space. On her final trip, she heard QueQoa just beyond a fan-like formation of towering pines asking Naatos if he wanted his spear back. Well, at least they had returned.

  She made her last trip to the little room and then finished her hair, choosing a loose half braid that fell over one shoulder. It had been ages since she had done anything more than functional with her hair.

  Satisfied, she hurried to the mouth of the cave, then slowed her pace. She didn't need to be running to him. Not yet anyway.

  They were not too far from the opening of the cave, down several feet from the ledge and in a space where the fir trees had opened up.

  An enormous carcass of some dinosaur-like creature lay flat on the ground, a large pool of blood soaking into the ground near its stomach which had been sliced open. QueQoa and WroOth were wrapping ropes around its long green tail and speckled neck while Naatos wiped something from his face. He was drenched… in blood and something else.

  She slowed her approach, uneasy. The sight of him covered in blood wasn't really what she needed at the moment. "Did it—did it swallow you?"

  "Yes," Naatos said without glancing back. "But that was a poor choice."

  Obviously.

  "Look at this, dear heart," WroOth called out. He gestured to the creature. "Do you even know what this is? Because this has never been seen on Ecekom in all our days, and none of us know what it is. Except it took Naatos's presence as a personal offense."

  "This is why everyone carries a knife in the wilderness," Naatos responded. He shook his head, still dripping.

  Amelia frowned as she drew closer. The reptilian creature was over fifty feet in length with a long snout and jagged teeth that would overlap the outer jaw. The tongue that lay on the ground was overlong and lined with multi-pointed teeth. Its green hide appeared thick with soft brown splotches and darker brown speckles especially along its head, neck, and tail and larger bands along its enormous ribs. It had no wings, but it did have long hooked claws and a bulbous hump. "That's not like anything I've ever seen either."

  "You did something to your eyes," QueQoa said. "They look bigger."

  "Yes." She ducked her head, the heat flaring through her once again. At least she knew to expect it. "It's just the trick of eyeliner." She turned to Naatos then before she lost her nerve. "I wanted to know if I could talk to you in private?"

  He wiped more blood from his face as it dripped down from his hair. "Yes, as soon as this is finished."

  More waiting. She could handle that though. The smell coming off him on the other hand… "Before then, could you clean up? Preferably in a river out here or some place?"

  "Why wouldn't I use the cave?" He scowled at her. "There's a river in there. The current is strong enough that it washes everything out. There's no risk of contamination."

  "You're going to make the cave smell like blood and bile."

  "I'm sure it's smelled worse."

  "It probably has." She pressed her elmis harder against her torso. "But I'd rather it didn't. Is there a river or something you can use out here that won't get you eaten or crushed or something horrible like that?"

  He narrowed his eyes at her. "Bad smells happen, veskaro. You—"

  A pinecone sailed through the air and struck him in the head. He glanced back, his hand rising to his head as he glared at his brother. "WroOth."

  WroOth widened his eyes at him as he spread his arms, then gestured toward Amelia.

  So much for all of this being subtle.

  "Oh." Naatos paused, his gaze riveting toward her as if he saw her for the first time. Bright desire leaped into his eyes. "Oh."

  "Yes," WroOth said much louder. "There is a very good river that can be used out here. He is not needed for any of this. He is going away now. And if he doesn't, I shall drown him."

  She smiled but couldn't hold eye contact any further. Stepping back, she motioned to the cave beyond the trees. "I made a place in a little area by the river in the cave. I'll—I'll see you soon."

  It took even more control to walk at a casual pace back to the cave. Once she reached the trees, she peeked back. Naatos was moving away as well, still covered in blood and bile. Likely to whatever water source WroOth had mentioned. Her heart twisted at the sight as memories returned.

  Could she really trust that he wasn't going to do something horrible when they finally escaped this world? He wasn't who she thought he was to start, but he could still be brutal, especially in his attempts to make matters better. Hundreds, perhaps thousands of families, still grieved in Libysha because of what he and his brothers had done. It had been done once. Who was to say it could not happen again? He had spoken of the big picture. Of greater goals that required some bad things happen but which in the end was better. But she could never forget the small pictures in light of the big one.

  Was it possible to forget all that and focus only on the now? Or was she only postponing heartache and compromise? She chewed on her lip as she walked, wishing at the same time that Naatos had been ready. It was hard not to think, and now that she had started again, she couldn't
stop.

  * * *

  She was ready. She was actually ready. The damage of the mind shade could be forgotten for now. Everything could be forgotten except this.

  Naatos's vision was still slightly blurred, and his ability to smell significantly compromised thanks to the creature, whatever it was. That was one more thing to worry about. That creature wasn't like anything he'd ever seen, and it hadn't been felled easily. Even with healing, substances that affected his ability to smell always lingered. One of the more annoying nuances of Vawtrian healing.

  But he didn't need to smell or see well to clean up in the river. It would have helped to dodge the bars of soap WroOth flung at him though.

  "I only need one," he shouted after his brother.

  "Use them all!" WroOth called out from the prickle-spined bushes, his voice fading as he continued back toward the cave.

  He scoffed but retrieved all six bars. Sometimes his brother could be overly dramatic. Half of these had to be pulled out of their leaf wrappers. AaQar would not be so amused about having to repackage them. Still that wasn't his problem.

  Really, nothing could harm his mood now. Not the cold water. Not the soap lobbed at his head. Not the stench still in his nostrils. Not the consistent warnings that Ecekom had changed for the worse and they were entering far more dangerous territory.

  All worries could wait until the following day.

  Without the suphrite for cleansing, he had to change into entirely fresh clothing which his brother had been thoughtful enough to not fling into the river or at his head. He'd just put them in the tree where it was obvious but inconvenient.

  Sikalt.

  All in all, it did not take long to finish and return to the cave, but AaQar stopped him at the entrance. "A moment."