The Changeling's Source (Evedon Legacy Book 1)

by Sarah Lynn Gardner

  I stormed the stairs to my room, and collapsed backward on my bed. Don’t cry yet. Don’t cry yet.

  When someone knocked at the door seconds later, I sat up. Allowing anger to fuel my energy, stewing dark source, I rose and hurried down the stairs.

  I swung the door open as Asher was about to knock again.

  “Hey, I—”

  “What do you think, that I’m some idiot loser you can use as fodder for your cruel pranks?”

  Asher’s eyes grew wide. “Tara, what are you talking about?”

  “Of course you’ll deny it. Go away, Asher. I don’t want you here.” I started to slam the door, but he shot out his foot and kept it open.

  “Tara—wait—”

  “I’m not some game you can play once and throw away,” I yelled at him, then shoved his foot back. “Goodbye.”

  “Hey, look, wait a seco—”

  I slammed the door.

  “Tara.” He banged on the door. “Can we talk?”

  I swung the door quickly back open. “Why, so you can keep lying to me?”

  “Lie to you? I’m not sure where this is coming from. Look, I left my speaker here on purpose, so I’d have an excuse to come back and spend time with you tonight. Even if it was only for five minutes.”

  I shook my head. Tears fell down my cheeks. Listen to him. That part in the back of my mind tried to reason with me again, but I was so worked up with dark source, I felt out of control. And what if I let it loose on him?

  “We can work on our project together at school, but that’s it.” I slammed the door again and returned to my room.

  Collapsing on my bed, I buried my face in my pillow and screamed into it, but then it reminded me of Jerrick smothering me with his.

  I flung it across my room. It hit the lamp, which fell to the ground with a crash.

  Negative source swirled inside me, this rising dragon consuming my ability to think straight. Sitting on my bed, I squeezed my eyes shut and pressed my palms to my temples. “Stop,” I whispered. Stop, stop, stop, stop. It spiraled, rising, growing, duplicating...

  “Tara?” Daniel’s voice invaded my distress.

  “I can’t control it.” I’m going to hurt him again. “Go, away, please.” Pushing my hands against my head even harder, I shook my head.

  “Nathaniel, go get your cat,” Daniel said. As he spoke, his voice drew closer. “Tara, take a deep breath.”

  “Turn on some classical music for her,” Mom’s voice joined his.

  “Breathe in. Breathe out,” Daniel said. His footsteps padded across my floor.

  I cried out instead.

  A furball climbed onto my lap and curled up, while an instrumental song played on my stereo.

  “Breathe, Tara,” Daniel whispered somewhere nearby.

  Finally, I listened. Took the first shuddering breath in. Then out.

  The breathing slowed the influx of negative source. The cat drew it out. The music allowed positive source to grow.

  Mom and Daniel sat down on either side of me. Mom picked up my hand while Daniel wrapped an arm around my shoulders and gave me a squeeze.

  Finally, without my thoughts bombarding me, I had the sense to direct the dark source away from my heart and allow positive toward it. As I scratched the kitten's neck, she began to purr, drawing dark source from me, displacing it into the air.

  I lowered my other hand from my head and stared at the floor, feeling numb all over and exhausted.

  Clarity hit me, and I started weeping again. I’d ruined things with Asher. I’m such a fool.

  His look of utter confusion standing on my doorstep as I falsely accused him was the only image I could think of, and my breathing came in short gasps. Bending on my lap, I covered my head. “Why’d Sam have to like him first?” I moaned.

  “He’s still knocking on the door,” Nathaniel said from the hall. “Should I tell him to go?”

  “What?” I sat straight and listened. After how I treated him, why would Asher even still be here?

  Sure enough, a knock echoed through the house. A pause, followed by another double knock.

  Wiping tears from my eyes, I glanced at Daniel, who sat closer toward the door.

  “He really wants to clear things up,” Daniel said. “I came in to check on you because he called.”

  Mom gave my hand another squeeze.

  If it was at all possible to make things up with Asher tonight, I needed to try. I couldn’t fathom why he kept trying with me. With a sigh, I cuddled Nathaniel’s kitten to me and stood up. “Can I keep her for a second?” I asked Nathaniel.

  He nodded, then stepped out of my way as I headed out and down the stairs.

  “Thank you,” I looked over my shoulder at him.

  I was so glad Oops was already in bed; I wouldn’t want her to see me like that.

  Before going down, I stopped in the bathroom and washed my dark source down the drain.

  19. Desperate Superhero

  My eyes burned from crying, and my hair was a mess, despite running my fingers through it. It would take a miracle for Asher to think well of me based on how I looked and from my earlier tantrum.

  Holding Nathaniel’s kitten up by my ear, listening to it purr, I stood on the opposite side of the door from Asher. Embarrassment clenched my chest. I did not want to face Asher, but I also didn’t want to burn the bridge if it was still possible to cross it.

  Slowly, I opened the door.

  Asher stood off the porch, looking up at my house, arms spread wide, looking helpless. An expression of final resignation like he was about to leave, was on his face. Seeing me, his eyes lit, and he came forward. “Tara, whatever I did or said wrong, I’m sorry.”

  “I was waiting for you to come back, then I saw you with Sam, and you looked happy—”

  “Happy?” Asher interjected, surprised.

  “You were walking so close together,” I said softly. “I thought maybe she’d drawn you into one of her schemes. That she’d gotten you to mess with me.”

  Asher came even closer. “I would never do anything like that. I hope you can believe me.”

  I rubbed the kitten’s head, looking at it instead of Asher.

  Asher closed the gap even further. “I was telling you the truth earlier when I said I’d rather be here with you than with them.”

  “Why don’t you think I’m crazy?” I looked at him. “Why would you stick around after I treated you like that?”

  Asher studied me. “I could tell you were hurting.” He jerked his thumb over his shoulder in Sam’s direction. “And for the record, that’s who I think is crazy.”

  My face crumpled, and I laughed a little.

  It was still a struggle for me to let go of my fear that he was in on one of her cruel jokes.

  “I’ve got thirty minutes,” Asher said, “and I’d love to spend them with you. Can I come in?”

  Nodding, I took several steps back, making way for him to enter, then closed the door behind us.

  Daniel and Mom hovered at the top of the stairs. Mom’s phone rang, and she disappeared into her room to answer—her typical when getting a call from work. Daniel retreated from view, but I wondered if he’d really gone.

  Knowing he was nearby comforted me.

  Asher turned around to face me, tilting his head to one side. He wiped a tear away from my cheek, then leaned in toward me. “I tried so hard to get here earlier. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you.”

  “That’s a lie.”

  “Okay, so you’re right. But you were on my mind a lot. Dinner was too short.”

  My cheeks felt warm. I couldn’t believe he was still interested in being friends with me. He was either desperate, or a superhero, or really in on a prank with Sam.

  Why me when the popular crowd wanted him?

  “Come sit down.” I retreated into the music room, and he followed.

  We sat on the sofa, and I nestled Nathaniel’s kitten onto my lap. For how high energy she usually was, i
t surprised me that she curled up near my stomach and was content to stay, her inner motor constantly purring. Continuously, she displaced my negative source.

  “Do you honestly think I’ve been messing with you all week?” Asher asked.

  “You were friends with Sam and the others first. They’re all the school’s best athletes.”

  “I thought I told you how I felt about athletes.”

  I paused, once again visualizing the tall, elementary school boy reading the Hobbit rather than playing sports with his classmates.

  “I guess after finding out you’re Sculley, and seeing how you interacted with Sam when you went to drop her off—”

  He opened his mouth to interject but quickly closed it again.

  “Walking arm in arm. Laughing. Going into her house. Can you blame me?”

  “I can see how’d you think that. From my standpoint, I was trying to get away from her. The reason I was such a dark character as Sculley was because I had no real friends. Everyone was only friendly with me because of my athletic ability. I was incredibly lonely.”

  My heart ached for him. “Why would you be interested in me, though? I’m kind of messed up.”

  Asher frowned. He reached to pet the kitten’s head. As he spoke, his gaze was on the cat. “When I’m with David and them, I always feel anxious. Not really able to relax and be myself, but somehow that’s different with you. I really would have cancelled with them tonight if my mom would have let me. I probably shouldn’t have double-booked with you, but I was obsessed with finding a way to do something with you first. I’m sorry I messed up tonight.”

  I’d misjudged him, and here he was the one apologizing. He really must be a superhero—or maybe he was desperate.

  A desperate superhero.

  “I’m sorry, Asher. I—” Fresh tears burned in my eyes, and I looked at the piano. “I’m freaked about us being friends because Sam was first.”

  “She’s not my friend,” Asher said. “More of a forced acquaintance. Remember how I wouldn’t play basketball with her?”

  “But you’ve spent time with her, and she has her eyes on you. Sam was my best friend, so I know how she is. Last year, out of jealousy, she hurt me,” my voice squeaked, “over and over again, then someone played a cruel prank that made me look like I was—” My chest was so tight. I was going to lose control again. I took a deep breath, picking up from where I’d cut off. “Made me look like a jealous slut.” Sam’s words, not mine. “No one would listen to me when I told them it wasn’t me behind it all.”

  “I’ll listen,” Asher said. “If you want to talk about what happened. Though, I understand if you don’t trust me.”

  Pressing my lips together, I shrugged, then shook my head. How raw did I want to be with Asher? My version of the story sounded so unbelievable that even Holden, when I tried to tell him over the phone, had blasted it.

  Tara, grow up. Seriously, you expect me to believe that?

  Of course, Jerrick had gotten to him first.

  “You’re going to think I’m crazy.”

  “No, I’m not,” he said, firmly.

  Nathaniel’s kitten finally jumped to the ground and scampered off to the stairs.

  Picking up a pillow, I gripped it to my chest, then looked at him. The reassurance in his eyes inspired me to begin.

  “Sam and I were best friends since fifth grade, when I moved across the street from her. My brother’s best friend, Camden, lived next door to her. He had a brother, Jerrick, who’s a little older than you are. The five of us spent all our free time together.”

  Asher nodded. “It must have been nice for you all to live so close.”

  “Yeah, now I hate it.”

  “I can appreciate that having lived next to Emma’s family this whole last year.”

  I nodded. “Sam had the hugest crush on Camden. When we were in middle school, she convinced me to have a crush on Jerrick.”

  “How does that work?” Asher asked.

  “She’s fairly forceful in her opinion.”

  “Yeah, I can understand that,” Asher said.

  Something about the way he said that made me wonder what opinions she’d been forceful about. Or other things she may have pressured him for. “Have you kissed her?” The thought was off my lips before I had a chance to censor it.

  “No.” He said quickly. “Another one of Mom’s rules is that I can’t kiss a girl unless she’s met her and we’ve gone on two dates. You’re the only girl who’s gone on a date with me after meeting my mother.”

  “What?” I said in disbelief, thinking back to my earlier suspicion during our date that he was interested in kissing me. “Have you ever kissed a girl?”

  “Nope.”

  “Seriously?” Given his background as Sculley, I’d pegged him for having kissed a lot of girls. “Not even Emma?”

  “We were never like that. She was in love with someone else. Kind of got used as her go between because her parents didn’t approve of him. Between spending all my time with them, and my mom’s reputation for scaring off girls, it never happened.”

  I nodded.

  He leaned closer, peering intently at me. “Back to your story, let me guess,” Asher said. “Camden only ever looked at Samantha as the neighbor girl. Meanwhile, Jerrick was into you, because what bloke in his right mind wouldn’t be?”

  Oh, Asher was flirting with me.

  “And Sam got jealous and somehow stole Jerrick’s attention away from you.”

  “That’s a pretty good summation.”

  “How’d she steal him?” Asher asked.

  “Mom wouldn’t let me date until I was sixteen. During the summer, I went away for a couple of weeks, and while I was gone, Jerrick asked Sam if she thought I’d go on a date with him.”

  Asher rubbed his jaw. “And she said no, but that she would love to instead.”

  I nodded. “Bingo.”

  He scoffed. “She couldn’t stand the thought of you getting the guy when she couldn’t. I can understand now why you’re so scared of us even being friends.”

  “Well. That’s not all.”

  “You’re referring to everything that happened in the spring?” Asher asked. “The nasty comments, the pictures, the journal entries?”

  He knew about all of that? “I thought you said—”

  “I told them I wasn’t interested in hearing about it. Some people have been pretty pushy about making sure I have the facts.” Asher’s eyes narrowed as he looked at the floor, looking irritated by a memory. “Who hacked your account?” He looked at me.

  My mouth dropped open. “What?”

  “That’s obviously what happened.” A depth of understanding glowed in his green eyes that I couldn’t fathom how it came to be there.

  A cross-mix of relief and pain rushed through me. Tears welled up in my eyes. His immediate acceptance, no, his jump to the truth was what I’d wanted from Sam and Holden. “I don’t know. Sam’s younger sister, maybe? Jerrick’s younger brother? I don’t know. It wasn’t Jerrick. Though he posted a picture that was the most scathing of all.”

  “You’re pretty sure it wasn’t Sam?” Asher asked.

  “No,” I said softly. “I’m not.”

  Slowly, Asher shook his head. “I’m so mad at myself right now. After everything I went through with my so-called-friends last year, I should have been more sensitive.” Asher reached for the pillow I’d been using as a wall between us, gently prodding it out of my hands. “I understand why you thought what you did about me and Sam, but it’s not true. Are we good, now?”

  I rested my head on the couch and marvelled at Asher. “Yeah, we’re good.”

  He pulled on my elbow, drawing me out of my closed-off-position, then he wrapped an arm around me, tucking me right along his side. “I’d love to go on another date with you, if you’re interested.”

  I’d be crazy to say no, but the possibility of Sam’s vengeance still lurked on the fringes of my fears. “Why? So you can steal your first k
iss and run?” I teased.

  He chuckled. “I can’t run.” He tipped his nose close to mine. “As long as we’re lit partners.”

  The warmth of his breath tickled my lips, sending squirrely flutters from the pit of my stomach into my cheeks. It filled me with a longing to kiss him. Except, he had that second date rule for kissing.

  “You shouldn’t tease me like that.”

  He smiled.

  I placed my fingers on his lips and gently pushed him back. “We should work on our project sometime this weekend.”

  He caught my hand and pressed a lingering kiss to it, all while keeping eye contact with me, then cuddled it to his cheek. “I can’t tomorrow morning, but I could in the evening.”

  The skittering warmth blazing through me set my heart on fire.

  “That sounds fine to me.”

  “I’ll call you in the morning.”

  Asher’s phone buzzed in his pocket, vibrating against me. With a puzzled look, he pulled his arm from behind me to get it out. I caught a glimpse of the time.

  9:47.

  A tight feeling settled in the pit of my stomach. That was the same time of Jack’s message to him before the car crash.

  He groaned. “I’ve got to go.”

  “Wait. Is that Jack texting you?” I asked.

  “Yeah. He hasn’t done that in a year...” Asher trailed off.

  I had a pretty good guess where.

  “My sister Becca and Jack’s brother Joseph are married.”

  Jack had mentioned that. This time it struck me. I’d gone to Joseph’s reception eight years ago. My mouth dropped open. “Were you at their wedding?”

  He shook his head quickly. “Mom and Dad weren’t happy about Becca marrying Joseph. She was eighteen and just graduated high school. So they didn’t let me go.”

  I furrowed my brows. This made me wonder if there were times we had crossed paths and didn’t know.

  “Becca used to get Jack to check on me. We also were online gaming buddies, but that stopped a year ago.” Asher stretched out his legs. He sighed, sounding like he was getting rid of a heavy feeling. “Can I call you in the morning?” he asked.

  “Sounds good,” I said.

  I walked him to the door. He blocked me from opening it. “Seriously, though, can I have a second date?”