The Accidental Kiss

by Heatherly Bell

  Another stone lodged itself in her throat. Clearly, she was the most selfish person on earth. Even Milly expected that she would leave immediately because the baby had been born. Because she’d been trying to find the father so that she could feel better about leaving again. Maybe that was true at one time, but she’d changed. If she didn’t believe her, it was because of her history and the fact that nothing had ever kept her from traveling for long. Now there was Paris, a dream she’d had forever. But for the first time in her life she didn’t want to go. This time it was Paris that could wait. It wasn’t going anywhere. She’d rather stay in Miracle Bay and never see another city for as long as she lived than to live even one day in Paris without Dylan.

  Charley saw Henry emerge from Milly’s room a while later and head in the opposite direction, walking with his shoulders hunched, hands in his pockets. Milly’s eyes were closed when Charley walked back in the room. The curtain was open and little Coral slept in the bassinette next to the bed.

  “Asleep on the job?”

  Milly opened her eyes half-mast. “Oh, Henry just left. He wouldn’t stop talking. How beautiful Coral is, what a great birth weight for a baby three weeks early, blah, blah, blah.”

  “Proud papa.”

  “He’s great,” Milly sighed. “Just as I suspected he would be.”

  “But now you have another problem.”

  “He’s not going to push it. He knows I can’t go with him, and I’m not going to let him give up the great opportunity he has in San Diego. Such is life. Our daughter is perfect. Maybe we get only one perfect thing.”

  She sounded so much like Coral. I’m not greedy.

  “But you can go with him and you should. I’m not leaving Miracle Bay, so I’ll stay here and run the bakery.”

  “Trying to get rid of me?”

  Charley shook her head. “Not trying to get rid of you. Trying to set you free. You were the one who stuck around and ran our bakery while I traveled. You’ve always been the perfect daughter and the perfect sister. It’s your turn to have an adventure. I want you to reach for your dream, just like you always wanted me to reach for mine.”

  “But Pa—”

  “Look, I don’t care anymore. I have the bakery and the new lunch menu is going well, and I have lots of other ideas. I’ve never had this kind of creative control. It’s exciting.”

  “But…Paris! I can’t let you give that up. I just can’t.”

  “I’ve already given it up. Dreams change, you know?”

  “But if I move, you’ll still miss seeing little Coral grow up.” Milly’s eyes got watery and her lower lip quivered. “Oh, these damned hormones! Whether you go to Paris, or whether I go to San Diego, we’re not going to be together anymore, are we? Life is changing for both of us.”

  Heart in her throat, Charley had to nod because for a moment she didn’t trust herself to speak. “You’ll come visit often, right?”

  “Of course. And…you never know, it might not work out with me and Henry.”

  “Don’t say that. You hope it will.”

  “Yeah, of course I do. That would be kind of ideal.” Milly grabbed Charley’s hand in a rare gesture and squeezed. “I’m scared. This happened so fast and I haven’t had time to get use to the idea. Henry and I are parents.”

  “You’ve had nine months to get used to the idea.”

  “To get used to the idea of having a baby. Not to get used to the idea of living with a man and sharing my life with him. Sharing a bathroom, not to mention a baby. Being together all the time. I’ve never done that before. I mean, what if we don’t get along? What if I hate him eventually?”

  “Maybe, maybe, maybe. Isn’t little Coral a good enough reason to try?”

  33

  “Bra off. Hair up. Belly out.” ~ Meme

  Later that night, while Charley waited for Dylan she cooked. Always good therapy. Tonight, a flourless quiche made with eggs, milk, butter and salt because eggs were highly underrated. Sort of a breakfast for dinner. Maggie used to feed Charley breakfast for dinner often, except it was a bowl of sugared cereal and milk. Like any six-year-old kid, Charley had loved it. But there were some days when the cereal she ate three times a day ran out and Maggie was either not home or asleep when Charley got hungry.

  She’d found a neighbor lady who gave her cookies when she rang her doorbell. So, Charley had ramped it up a bit and asked for eggs one day. As a child, she’d loved eggs. Scrambled, sunny side up, any way she could get them they were a rare treat.

  That same nice lady brought her inside and fed Charley at her table. Pretty much a feast. Eggs, bacon, buttered biscuits, jam. Whatever she wanted. After that, Charley came every day that Maggie didn’t have time to feed her. The kind lady watched Charley eat and one day when she left the room she spoke in hushed tones to someone over the phone. That really wasn’t unusual to Charley. All the grown-ups in her life spoke in hushed tones around her. “Grown-up stuff” Maggie called it.

  Unfortunately for Charley, the kind lady had been speaking with Child Protective Services. The next day some more grown-ups she didn’t recognize showed up and asked for Maggie. Charley had no idea where she was, but knew she’d be back. She always came back. She asked them to come inside and wait. Keep her company.

  Even though she swore she’d never ask anyone for food again, those people took her away from Maggie Young. As a full-grown adult, Charley realized it had been the right thing to do. But as a child, they might as well have gutted her like a fish. It had taken some time, but she’d found the right family with Coral and Milly Monroe. Two women who never gave up on her. She still had Milly and now little Coral.

  And Dylan, of course. Because terrified though she was by the thought, she was in love with him. She loved him in a soul-harvesting, bone-crushing way that she’d never loved anyone before.

  When she heard a knock on the door, she opened it to Dylan. Her basil. They were tomato and basil, a combination meant to be together. He looked amazing, wearing a black denim type jacket and still dressed in his blue BDUs. A little tired, his dark eyes took on that edgy look when he was worried about his family. Or about her.

  “Hey, you.” She folded into his arms.

  He tugged her in tight, so much so that she had trouble taking in a breath for a second. When he let her go, he tucked a hair behind her ear and gave her an anguished look that kicked her in the heart.

  Her voice came out sounding shaky and small. “What happened?”

  It couldn’t be Coral. She’d just seen mother and baby this afternoon and they were fine. Irrationally, she considered the eggs she’d cooked tonight would bring her devastating news again. Her heart rate kicked up and her breathing became shallow.

  “Is it the baby?”

  “No.” He shook his head.

  She allowed herself to breathe again. “I went to visit them earlier. Her name is Coral. Isn’t that perfect?”

  “Wherever she is, Coral is honored.” He pressed his forehead to hers. “Hey. You know I’d do anything for you, right?”

  “I know. Now tell me what’s wrong.”

  He took her hand and led her to the couch. “Sit down.”

  “No. I won’t sit. Not until you tell me what’s wrong.”

  “Fine. I’ll sit down.” Then he pulled her onto his lap and his hands tightened around her wrists. “You need to go to Paris.”

  “What? Oh, is that what this is about? That’s why you’ve been so weird? I’m not going anywhere. Did Sean say something? You shouldn’t listen to Sean.”

  “I’m not. I still think he’s an ass. But he was right about one thing. It’s the opportunity of a lifetime.”

  “All that can wait.”

  “For how long?”

  “I don’t know, does it matter?”

  “It does to me. Chances like this one don’t always come up. God knows I can’t take you to Paris.”

  She wrenched herself from out of his lap and stood up. This would be adorable if it wasn’t s
o damned infuriating right now. Once again, he was making a sacrifice and being the hero.

  “But you do want me to stay. You asked me to stay.”

  “I said that before I knew you had this opportunity.”

  “For years I’ve wanted adventure and I thought traveling would do that for me. I thought Paris would be exciting and all I ever wanted. But these past two weeks, I’ve been on the greatest adventure of all. I don’t want to go and you’re the reason.”

  “That’s just it, Charley. I’m not ready to be the only reason you stay.”

  Her heart dropped feeling from roughly the distance of the Empire State Building to hell itself. “You’re…not ready?”

  “I can’t be the reason you stay when I don’t even know if I’ll be around tomorrow. Or the next day. I didn’t tell you this, but the night of the fire I almost didn’t make it out of that building.”

  “Oh. Dylan.”

  “And I can’t have you losing more than you’ve already lost in your life. I don’t want you to invest any more time in me or fall in love with me.”

  Too late, buddy. Too late.

  “I think,” he said, without meeting her eyes, “that we rushed into this without thinking.”

  “Rushed, Dylan? Rushed? It’s been thirteen years for me!” Trying to find regulate her breathing, she fought to keep her balance while the entire world was tipping over. “You said you were in. You were all in.”

  Eyes closed, he pinched the bridge of his nose. “I thought I was. Now I know it’s my heart that’s all in. Not my head.”

  She was about to tell him that she’d take his heart and he could forget about the rest, but Dylan made all decisions with his head. Never with his heart and she’d known this about him for as long as she’d known him.

  “We’ll always be best friends.” He tipped her chin to meet his gaze. She saw shimmering dark eyes that were unreadable. This meant she couldn’t even tell if he was as heartbroken as she felt.

  He was breaking up with her.

  She pushed against his chest, feeling like a hollowed-out dead tree. “But not…not naked friends.”

  “No.” He loosened his hold on her. “Not anymore.”

  She shook her head, feeling tears wet her lashes. It was too much. Love and pain and grief and longing mixed together so that she could barely breathe or stand on buttery legs. She heard Maggie’s voice in her head.

  We don’t need him.

  And for the first time she understood. Understood why Maggie kept her from a father and why Milly came close to doing the same with Coral. Loving someone deeply was too scary. Too risky. It was easier to keep people away. Maggie had chosen not to love or need anyone that much, not even her own daughter. But it was too late for Charley. She’d never really been given a choice. She needed the man who’d loaned her his strength when she didn’t have enough of her own. She needed the flawed and infuriating man with a huge heart.

  He was hers. He’d always been hers.

  “This is the biggest cop-out I’ve ever seen, and I’ve seen and heard some doozies. This isn’t about me. It’s about you! You’re the one afraid to risk your heart. You’re the one who’s running. For the first time, you can’t pin this one me. You are the one who’s leaving.”

  “Okay, maybe you’re right.” He released her, his hands gliding up her arms and back down again. “Maybe I don’t trust that you’d be happy here forever. Maybe I don’t think that’s really who you are.”

  “That’s so unfair. How can I prove it to you?”

  “That’s it. I don’t know if you can.” He stood. “I’ve got to go.”

  “Why? We’re not done here.”

  “Talking more isn’t going to help either one of us.”

  “Don’t you leave right now. Don’t go.”

  “Someday you’ll see I was right about this.”

  “No, I won’t! You are wrong. I won’t ever agree.”

  “I get to be right occasionally.” He gave her a sad mile. “And this time, I know I am.”

  Without another word, he was out the door.

  34

  “A party without cake is just a meeting.” ~ Julia Child

  Dylan spent the next few days keeping busy while feeling sorry for himself. His was a sad state of affairs and he was already sick of himself. At least both the sailboat, and now Joe’s new business, were a welcome distraction. The loan papers were prepared for the board shop in Santa Cruz and the loan would be funded within thirty days. He’d be a silent partner in a venture which would hopefully turn his youngest brother into a regular business man.

  A couple of days before Sunset Kiss, Dylan was putting the last touches on the sailboat when both of his brothers showed up. Marco had a six-pack of Corona with him.

  “We need to talk,” Marco said as he hopped on board. Joe followed, and the combined weight of his two tall brothers made the boat rock.

  “What’s up?” Dylan picked up the rag he’d been using to make this baby shine and accepted a beer from Marco.

  “Wondering if you’re tired of yourself yet,” Marco said.

  “Excuse me?” Dylan scowled.

  “You told me once that you’d want someone to tell you if you were being an idiot,” Joe said, grinning. “And it’s taken me a hell of a long time, but brother, I can now tell you: you’re being an idiot.”

  Marco nodded. “I concur.”

  “If I wanted your advice, I’d ask for it. There’s nothing here for you to worry about.”

  “Right, right,” Marco said. “Because you’re the only one allowed to worry about your brothers.”

  “I’m worried, D,” Joe said, his brow creased.

  “What? Why? I’m doing good. I just invested in a promising new business, and I’m about to make a killing over a few misguided people wanting to take a sailboat at sunset. Work is good, family is good.” He took a swig of the cold beer. “I’m good.”

  “Denial,” both Marco and Joe said at once.

  “I think it’s the first stage,” Marco said.

  “Bro, I’ve seen you break up with a lot of women over the years, but I’ve never seen you more miserable than you are now,” Joe said.

  “Same,” Marco said.

  They were right. Charley might think that he’d fallen for her because she’d accidentally kissed him at sunset. He knew better. She was strong, funny, beautiful and brave and he was deeply in love with her.

  Not much he could do about it now.

  “I hate talking about this,” Dylan said.

  “We know,” Joe said.

  “I kept quiet as long as I could, believe me,” Marco said. “I don’t like talking any more than you do. But I’m tired of watching you mope around the house like someone tore your heart out.”

  He’d been slayed to the core by his own decision. Torn up by the fact that he’d hurt her without intending to. Hurt both of them. Worse, he’d done it intentionally and preemptively to avoid a greater hurt later on.

  Who the hell did that? There was no way this could hurt any worse. No way in hell.

  “I can only imagine what it must be like to love someone that much, but you do love her and you can’t change it now. Maybe it’s time to take that risk.” This from Joe, risk-taker extraordinaire.

  Risk equals reward. Yeah, but Dylan only took calculated risks in business. And if he took a chance on Charley, she was taking one on him. “What about her risk?”

  “Dude, she’s the biggest risk-taker of all of us,” Marco said. “She was born into it. If Charley hadn’t taken any risks, she might not even be alive today.”

  “And you can’t make the decision for her,” Joe said. “If she’s ready to stick around for good, to love someone who might not come home from his job one night, then you need to be ready to let her. Because maybe it’s better to take whatever time you’re given together than nothing at all.”

  There was silence, other than the rolling sounds of the tide and the seagulls squawking overhead.

&nb
sp; Marco fist bumped with Joe. “Damn, bro. That was some seriously good shit.”

  Joe beamed, his bright smile lighting up his face. “What do you think Dylan? Good shit?”

  Yeah. His little brother had just schooled him. Maybe it was high time to take a risk. No point in protecting his heart when he’d already lost it to Charley. If she was willing to give up Paris for now, he was willing to trust that she’d never regret it. What’s more, he was willing to work to make sure she’d never have the smallest regret.

  “Guess I’ve got some planning to do.”

  This would be all for her, and all about her. Because she was everything to him and if it meant swallowing his pride, he was willing to do far more than that to get her back.

  “Can we help?” Marco said.

  “Glad you asked,” Dylan said. “Because I’m going to need all the help I can get.”

  He had one day to get this right.

  One day to say the right words.

  One day to ask her to forgive him.

  One day, and then hopefully, the rest of his life.

  35

  “You’re my favorite mistake.” ~ Meme

  Charley cried for three days.

  She cried so much that her eyes were almost swollen shut and Naomi thought she’d had an allergy attack.

  “Antihistamines really work for me,” Naomi said brightly, completely oblivious.

  Charley wanted that kind of oblivion. She wanted to evaporate like water, or a good reduction sauce. Mostly she wanted the pain to stop for a few minutes. And of course, she wished for Naomi that she’d always live in a bubble and never feel pain, or loss, or her heart lying shattered in pieces.

  But by the fourth day, all the crying was done. Now she was just royally pissed.

  Dylan was wrong about her and if it took to her dying day she’d prove it to him. He didn’t trust her. Well, she wasn’t going anywhere ever again. Not Paris. Not New York City or New Orleans. Then he’d have to eat his own words. Before the DNA debacle and the search for Milly’s baby daddy, Dylan hadn’t won one of their arguments in years. In fact, he’d once joked about the fact. Said he looked forward to the day she’d agree with him and admit he’d been right. Well, she had already admitted he’d been right about Milly. That was enough for the rest of her life.