by Megan McCoy
“Yes, you don’t even know. I need his doctor records, too. I’m sure he needs some vaccines soon,” she said. “Do you have them?”
Mac felt his head spin. “Text me a list of things you need,” he suggested.
She nodded, her dark hair falling around her shoulders. “The pizza will be here in five minutes,” she tapped into her phone and said, “that will be $30 including tip.”
“Someone broke me this afternoon,” he said and just handed her his wallet. Why not? Jess was going to do what Jess wanted to do.
“Work harder,” she suggested, pulling cash from his wallet and handing it back. “You have a son to raise and a nanny to pay.”
“And apparently,” he picked another receipt up, “bedding and toys to buy.”
“You’re welcome.” She smiled at him.
“We need to discuss a budget,” he tried to glare at her.
“That is you and your new nanny’s issue,” she waved him off. “I’m just here to help out.”
“Woman, if this is helping, I’d hate to see you hinder,” he suddenly flashed back to his dad who had told his mom those same exact words how many times growing up.
Jess seemed to recognize them, too, she’d been under his family’s roof most of her life, then his dad had a heart attack on the golf course when he and Carly were six. His mom had suddenly been a single parent.
“Seriously, Mac? I think the words you meant were ‘oh, Jess, you are amazing, I adore every little thing you do for me’, right?”
“I need a beer,” Mac opened the refrigerator door and grabbed two. “Here, you probably need one after all that shopping.”
“And painting,” she reminded him, taking the bottle from him as her stomach growled loudly. “Sorry, I forgot to eat today.”
“Forget to eat again, and I’ll make sure you have consequences,” he said. “Last thing I need is my son’s caretaker passing out on the job.”
Wrinkling her nose at him, she took a swig of her beer, and said, “You into force feeding?”
“No, I’m into knocking some sense into the other end,” he said. Now that would be a better stress relief than a bottle of beer. Even though it was very good beer.
Jess snorted and laughed. “Sorry, but that almost sounds like…”
“Yes, if you are under my roof caring for my child and don’t take care of yourself, little girl, I will put you over my knee and blister your butt.”
Jess stared at him. The doorbell rang, and she went to answer it, shaking her head as he watched her walk away. Why had he never noticed her before? Because she’d grown up with his sister, of course and he’d thought of them as a set, a pair. But she wasn’t his sister, and he was serious. She better take care of herself.
Jess traded money for pizza and walked back into the kitchen. He had a couple plates out and she decided not to ask him for clarification on his last statement. Chalking it up to his having had a few stressful days and then her springing a thousand-dollar bill on him, sure, he could be allowed to bluster. She didn’t believe he’d actually do that for a minute. Did she? Nope. Last thing he was going to do was run her off. The thought of him doing... well, that, gave her shivers though and an odd feeling in her stomach. He didn’t know, he couldn’t know, no, it was just him being Mac, nothing more. It wasn’t like he’d read her stories or anything. She needed to just ignore his nonsense.
“I have three interviews scheduled for next week with nannies,” she said. “If I get any I like, then I’ll set up a time on Saturday for you to talk with them. I’ll try and get a few more lined up, too. I’m taking tomorrow to set up the nursery, and the new crib will be here early afternoon, so that should work out well.”
“I thought you bought a toddler bed or something?”
“Yes, but I’m homing the crib he’s in now to the organization here in town that helps people needing a hand, and the new one will convert into a toddler bed as he grows. If you are lucky, you won’t have to buy him another bed until he’s in school.” Jess sighed in ecstasy as she took her first bite of pizza. She really did need to remember to eat.
“That doesn’t make sense to me,” Mac said.
“It doesn’t have to. Just pay the bills, smile and nod. I’ll be out of your hair soon enough,” she said, and took another bite of pizza.
“You aren’t bad to have around,” Mac said. “I just would like to be involved in decisions that affect my son.”
“You keep saying my son,” Jess said, slowly. “Are you adopting him or just trying to get used to the idea?”
“It will take a while, but yes, I’m planning to adopt him. I have a lot of hoops to jump through.” He looked at her over his second piece of pizza, and added, “I don’t know how I’m going to explain his pink room on the home visit from the social worker.”
“I doubt if the color of his room will affect anything and besides, it’s mostly raspberry.”
“It affected you,” he retorted.
“Only because what you had him in was cold and sterile and kinda not for a baby,” she explained. “Once I get done with his room, you will love it and so will anyone else who comes in.” Jess took another bite of pizza and dared him to tell her differently. He was adopting Sam. That should be good news, right? Well, it would be if he wasn’t gone all the time at work, and the only parent. Sam would never lack for anything material in this life, but who was going to love him and kiss his boo boos, teach him how to tie his shoes and how to be a decent man, if his dad was always either at work or exhausted? The nanny she was in charge of hiring. The burden of that felt heavy on her shoulders. He was in charge of the final decision, she reminded herself, and then reminded herself to swallow her chewed food. One thing at a time.
“Do you have plans for the weekend?” she asked him.
“Thought I’d spend the weekend throwing the ball around with my boy,” he said.
“Darn, I didn’t put a ball and glove on my buying list,” she pouted.
“Maybe next weekend, then. No, no plans, do you need to do something?”
“No, was just curious if you’d be here when I put the new bed together. I didn’t know your usual routine, if you worked or what.”
“Before Sam, I’d sleep until noon on Saturday, go out on Saturday night, sleep until noon on Sunday and then do house chores, laundry and things in the afternoon. Exciting life.”
“Sounds like it. I hear Sam.” She started to stand up, but he held up his hand.
“I’ll get him.”
Jess put the pizza away, and thought about what he’d said. Adoption. It wasn’t disloyal to Carlene. She would have wanted him to go to family if she had any idea something would happen to her. Of course, Jess considered herself family, too. But, legally, yeah, she had no chance when Mac was willing, able and stable. Could she simply be his favorite Aunt Jess? She’d have to be. Unless she found out something that made her question his parenting ability or who knows what else.
Mac came in, holding the sobbing baby just a minute later. “Where did you put his bottles?”
“I moved the mini fridge and the warmer to the guest room.” Jess got up and went to the refrigerator. “Here, I’ll warm this one real quick.” Grabbing a pan from the drainer, she put it on the stove with some water and placed the bottle in it. “Shh, hang in there, baby, it won’t take long.” Sam didn’t believe her and revved up while Mac jostled him and patted him.
“Shh, Sammy boy, you are fine, I promise. Daddy’s here.”
There he went again. She was going to have to get used to it. The bottle didn’t take long to warm and soon Sam slurped it down happily.
“He is such an easy baby,” she said. “Feed him, keep him dry.”
“Paint his room pink,” Mac said, dryly, not taking his eyes off the baby.
“A girl does what she can to make a baby happy,” Jessie agreed. “Get over it, Mac. It was Carly’s favorite color and I’m not going to let him forget his mom.”
“I won’t either,�
� Mac said, standing with the baby in the crook of his arm, with the bottle in the other. “Or his first dad.”
“Okay, good.”
“Tomorrow morning, we need to talk,” he said.
“I thought we were talking,” Jess replied. “I need to do laundry. Oh and you need to call your mom, if you haven’t. It’s her birthday. Or better yet, video chat and let her see her grandson.”
Mac shook his head as she walked out of the room. Seriously. What was wrong with him asking her to come? He needed help, that was why. Walking over to the laptop in the corner, he dialed his mom’s number. “Happy birthday, Mom. Sam would say the same, but he’s zonked out.” He focused the monitor on the now sleeping baby.
“What a pretty baby,” she said. “Is it my birthday?”
“It is,” he said.
“Then I should be going to the party tonight,” she said. “Where is Carlene?”
“She’s with Jessie,” he assured her.
“Don’t mess with Jess,” his mom said. “I need to get ready for the party.”
“Bye, Mom, Bye, Eve,” he said to the aide standing there who had answered the phone. “Thank you for taking such good care of her.” He closed the laptop and felt sad. His mom’s disease was slowly taking the woman who had raised Carlene and him alone with all the passion and love that Sam would miss in his life, without a fierce loving mother. He hated this little one would be raised by nannies and daycares, and him, of course, but it wasn’t the same. Lots of kids did well with a single parent. His mom had been a nurse who worked long hours, but he never doubted she loved them and while she had missed some things, she had also attended others. Sam would never doubt he was loved or who his father was. But he really needed a mother. In a few years, he could cut down his insane schedule and be there for ball games or concerts and parent conferences at school, but he really needed to focus right now, and Sam really needed a mom, no, a nanny. He walked into the dark living room and sat down in the rocker by the window, just wanting a little time with his boy. Hearing Jessie go upstairs, he smiled. It was nice to have another adult, her, in the house.
Later, walking upstairs with the sleeping baby, he accidentally walked into the pink room, before he remembered the crib was in Jessie’s room for the night.
Her door was open, so he walked in, to put Sam down. “Jess? What’s wrong?”
She sat cross legged on her bed, tears streaming down her face. Mac carefully laid the baby down, then went to the bed, grabbed her hand, and pulled her out of the room. He walked down the hall to his room where she broke down in sobs before they got a foot in the door. “Jess, talk to me. What’s wrong?”
“My school closed. I don’t have a job to go back to.”
He sat her down beside him on his bed. Did he make it this morning or had she? He didn’t remember. It didn’t matter, it mattered that Jess was upset. “What do you mean your school closed?”
“I work for a private school. The board decided to close ours and merge with another one and my job is redundant,” she looked up at him. “I’ve been there five years, and I’m redundant.”
“I’m so sorry, Jess. That has to be…” He struggled for a word. Had to be what? “Had to be horrible news to hear.” He patted her back and she cried harder. Though he knew it was something they not only did, but often needed to do, he was no good with crying females. What did you do with one? Did you pet it? Offer it water? Okay, pretend she was Sam, he told himself. Gathering her in his arms, he settled her on his lap and wrapped his arms around her while she sobbed into his shoulder.
“Shh, it’s okay,” he told her and then because it sounded good, he told her again, and patted her back. Eventually, she calmed down, and just took a few hitching sobs. Was he supposed to say something?
“Jess, I’m sorry,” he said. That sounded good. Females liked to talk about their emotions. Ask questions. “Did you not have a clue it was going to happen?”
She shook her head and sniffled. He reached for a tissue on the nightstand and handed it to her. “I’d heard rumors off and on for years, but was always told when it happened, we’d have a couple years notice. I had no information saying they were even in negotiations, much less making a decision about closing.”
“You’re in shock,” he said, patting her back again, hoping she wouldn’t burp like Sam. Well, if she did, he’d pretend she didn’t. See, he was acing this. Who said he couldn’t handle crying females? The last one he’d made cry, naturally.
“Of course I’m in shock! I just lost my job, and it’s probably too late in the year to get another teaching job, that all the other teachers in my school will be vying for, too. I’m going to lose my house and I don’t know what I’m going to do!” Her voice continued to rise, and he just held her tightly and rubbed her back. Just in case the patting did create an unfortunate side effect.
“Well, one thing you don’t have to do is make any decisions tonight,” he said. “There is nothing you can do tonight anyway. Why don’t you and me and Sam do something tomorrow? Let’s do a quick getaway somewhere and take your mind off things, then you can hit the ground refreshed and start figuring things out on Monday?”
“Ignore it and it will go away?” she asked, looking up at him, her tear-filled eyes almost glowing green, as they always were when her emotions were heightened. He liked her gray eyes.
“No, just step back away from the problem for a finite amount of time and then approach it with a new perspective.”
She nodded slowly. “Okay, I can agree with that. Thank you for the offer. Where are we going?”
“I don’t know, I’ll figure it out. Just pack an overnight bag for you and Sam with casual clothes and…” They both started at a buzz from downstairs. “The dryer is done.”
“And I’m sitting on your lap and I got your shirt all wet, I’m sorry, Mac.” She stood up and he had to admit he missed her on his lap. Probably not a good time to tell her that. He’d imagined her over his lap a few times, but not really on his lap. Odd.
“Non-issue,” he said. “Don’t worry, Jess, things will work out. You’re tough, strong and smart.”
“And in control, I know.” She looked at him, and continued, “Sometimes, though, I wish I wasn’t for a short amount of time.”
Mac understood, probably more than she did, exactly what she was talking about. He might not be able to handle crying women very well, but he did understand the cathartic release that a good cry had for many of them. He also understood the power exchange many strong women wished to have at home. Now was not the time to explain that to her, and besides, she wasn’t his in any way, shape or form. She was his sister’s best friend, little Sam’s godmother and honorary aunt, but not his date, live-in love or someone he was in a relationship with. Buddies, friends, only.
Right now, though, he had some thinking to do, because suddenly, he thought he had an option for her. He’d find a time during their getaway to talk to her about it, after he thought more on it, himself.
Jess went downstairs, pulled the clothes from the dryer and began folding them on the small handy counter next to it. Her mind raced, as she wondered what she would do. Well, she’d have to update her résumé and get it out as soon as possible. A sudden wave of homesickness swept over her. She wanted to be in her little cottage at home. Would she be able to keep it? It suddenly seemed like security and safety. That was ridiculous. It was simply a pile of stone and wood. She was her own security and safety. Making her decisions and doing what she wanted to do, and she’d figure out her own problems. Smart, educated, with a good work record, she’d have no trouble finding another job. Right? Probably. Maybe. Who knew? She’d find out.
Yawning, she finished folding clothes and went to put Sam’s away. She’d had a long day, and would be up a time or two with Sam tonight, since he was in her bedroom. And she wouldn’t have time to move things back tomorrow, depending on what time Mac wanted to leave. Maybe he was right, though, a little time away, to rest and refresh would b
e a good thing before her crazy busy week ahead. Plus it would let the paint smell dissipate some more before she moved Sam back in there. After a quick shower, she crawled into her bed, quietly, though Sam was a good sleeper, and stared at the ceiling. If she got a nanny hired next week, she could be back home in two weeks, ready to hit the job hunting hard. If they went somewhere tomorrow, she’d have to postpone the bed delivery. Her mind raced with all the details she needed to do, get done, and plan, and so she stared at the ceiling.
Her phone dinged and she looked at it. It had been blowing up with texts from her co-workers. Everyone was upset. Of course. But Marie just announced she was going back to school, instead of job hunting. Easy for her, she had a husband to help her out. Jessie had thought about going back to school, but it hadn’t seemed practical while working full-time. Other people did it, but while she often took a class during the summer, because she had to keep up with her continuing education, and she really wanted to earn her Masters, she hadn’t made the commitment to go back full-time yet. Was it too late? Find a job first, mortgage had to be paid, she reminded herself, then think about school. Also think about finding a nanny for Sam and finishing his room.
Smiling, she thought of Mac’s reaction when he’d seen the dusty pink wall. Too funny. It had so been worth it. She’d debated on it, but decided she really wanted to see his reaction. He was always so infuriatingly calm when he wasn’t grumbling and grumpy. Loving to push his buttons to see if she could get a rise out of him was one of the reasons she enjoyed being around him so much. As a teenager, he’d been a bit of a wild thing, but had settled down toward the end of college and now was one of the most proper and buttoned up men she knew. He might have grown up, but she didn’t have to if she didn’t want to. It was just fun to see the emotions cross his face and then be forced back down. One day she’d get him to, well, she didn’t know what, but it would be fun to watch it happen. He had it in him, she knew he did. He might even have it in him to, ‘don’t go there, Jess,’ she whispered to herself softly. She didn’t want to think about him threatening to spank her. It was a one off, just something he’d tossed out there, nothing he really meant.
