If Loving You Is Wrong

by E. L. Todd

  I processed his words for a moment. Then I sipped my drink. Trinity and I fought like we were going to battle. If we had guns, we would have blown each other to smithereens. We had no problem saying the most hurtful things to each other. But our sex was off the charts. Did that mean something?

  “What are you thinking?” my father whispered.

  My thoughts were shattered. I sipped my drink again and looked at the fire. “Nothing.”

  ***

  When I got back to my room, I texted Trinity. Are you awake?

  Now I am.

  Can I come over?

  Our parents are upstairs.

  Whatever. They aren’t going to know.

  It’s risky…

  Come on. I’m horny.

  Slade, it’s three in the morning. We’re getting up in three hours.

  Like I give a damn. I waited for her to respond. When she didn’t, I texted her again. I’ll do that thing you like.

  There are a lot of things I like.

  I’ll do them all.

  Fine. Make sure you aren’t seen.

  See you soon. I put my phone in my pocket then walked into the hallway. Just as I stepped out, I saw Skye step out in just a nightshirt. I froze, panicking. When she turned around, she saw me. Her eyes widened but she didn’t say anything.

  Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Why would I be up in the middle of the night?

  She stared at me then crossed her arms over her chest. “What are you doing?”

  “What are you doing?” I countered.

  “Um…”

  I realized she was in front of Cayson’s door. Then it hit me. “A midnight fuck?” I grinned at her.

  “Shut up, Slade. Don’t say anything.”

  “Maybe I will…maybe I won’t.”

  “And what are you doing?” she demanded.

  I went with the first excuse that came to mind. “Going to the bathroom.”

  She seemed to accept that. “Keep this to yourself.”

  “Then be nice to me.”

  “Go to hell.” She walked into her bedroom then shut the door.

  I stayed in the hallway, making sure she didn’t come out again. Then I dashed into Trinity’s room and shut the door quickly. The lights were off and I could barely see her. The outside light filtered through her window and allowed me to see her outline.

  Wordlessly, I undressed then got into the bed with her.

  “Be quiet,” she said. “I share a wall with my brother.”

  “If he hears anything, just tell him you were fingering yourself.”

  “What makes you think I’m the loud one?” she demanded. “You’re always the one moaning like you haven’t had sex before.”

  “Shut up. Fucking bare pussy is totally different than regular sex.”

  She sighed. “Let’s stop arguing and just screw already.”

  “Fine by me. I hate listening to you talk anyway.”

  “That makes two of us.”

  I moved on top of her then pulled her close to me. I slipped inside her without any problems. “You’re already soaked.”

  She dug her nails into my back but didn’t make a sound.

  “I guess you wanted me more than you let on.”

  “Just shut up and fuck me.”

  Her words made my spine shiver. I pressed my face closer to hers and kissed her while I rocked into her. She breathed into my mouth while I breathed into hers. Her pussy was the best damn thing in the world. It felt so good that I wanted to explode the moment we started. Her long legs wrapped around my waist, only arousing me more. I loved her legs more than any other feature. I loved how smooth and toned they were.

  I moved in and out without shaking her bed. We were both deadly silent. She moved under me slightly, clearly enjoying it. When she tensed around me, I knew she was hitting her climax. I crushed my mouth against hers and tried to keep her moans down. She was particularly loud during an orgasm. I usually didn’t mind because we were alone, but I definitely didn’t want her brother to hear it. When she was finished, her breathing returned to normal and I let myself go. I didn’t try to make it last longer because of our situation. I just wanted to get off and go to bed.

  I rolled off her then lay beside her. We both breathed hard, catching our breath. Trinity sighed loudly, the sound she usually made when she was satisfied. We didn’t speak, having nothing to say. I stared at the ceiling then felt my eyes grow heavy. Then I fell asleep.

  ***

  A knock on the door made my eyes snap open.

  “Trinity, are you awake?” It was her dad.

  Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

  Trinity and I were snuggling so close together we were practically one person. Her body was wrapped around mine and my arms formed a solid cage around her. I quickly sat up then kicked the blanket away.

  Trinity sat up and pulled the sheet over her. She looked at me with fear in her eyes. Too scared to speak and be overheard, we just spoke with our eyes.

  She pointed underneath the bed. “Hide,” she mouthed.

  I got down then moved under the bed, pulling my clothes with me.

  Fuck, I was a dead man.

  Trinity quickly pulled a shirt on. “Come in, Dad.”

  The door opened and he stepped inside. I could see his feet as he moved across the hardwood floor. I prayed he didn’t see me. He would strangle me then crack my skull open with his gorilla hands. My dad wouldn’t be able to protect me. Shit, my mom wouldn’t even be able to. She’d probably help him.

  He sat on the edge of the bed, the mattress sinking under his weight.

  I took a deep breath, trying not to be heard. My heart was pounding so fast I heard it in my ears.

  “Morning, honey.” He spoke with a gentle voice I never heard before. He was always so stern and deep all the time. He joked around a lot but there was always a threat in his eyes. He was the kind of guy I wouldn’t want to see in a dark alley. He was generous and compassionate, but he was also murderous. But he didn’t act that way at all with Trinity.

  “Hey, Dad.”

  “Sleep well?”

  “Yeah. It’s peaceful up here.” She also spoke in a tone I’d never heard before. It was quiet, almost submissive. Whenever she spoke to me or anyone else in our group, there was a fire in her voice. And there was always an attitude. But her father didn’t get that tone from her.

  “Your mom has always liked the snow. Whenever it falls at home, she never wants me to shovel it off the driveway…even though it makes it nearly impossible for me to get to work.”

  She chuckled lightly. “But she always gets her way.”

  “And so do you.”

  What the hell? I didn’t realize they were so close.

  “You ready to go skiing today?” he asked.

  “I’m excited. But I really want a cup of hot cocoa from the lodge. It’s my favorite.”

  “We’ll get one together. How about that?”

  “We can’t break tradition, right?”

  “Never,” he said. “Are you hungry?”

  “A little.”

  “You want me to bring you something?”

  “No, it’s okay. I’ll go down there after I get ready.”

  “Okay, Honey.”

  I heard him kiss her on the cheek or forehead.

  “I’ll see you soon.”

  “Okay, Dad.”

  He got up and walked to the door. “I’m excited to spend time with you this weekend.”

  “Me too.”

  He shut the door.

  I waited until I couldn’t hear his footsteps anymore.

  Trinity got up then locked the door.

  I slid from under the bed then got dressed as quickly as possible. “Shit, that was close.”

  She rounded on me like she might kill me. “Why did you sleep here?”

  “I don’t know. I always sleep with you.”

  “What kind of argument is that?” she hissed.

  “What? I was tired and fell asleep. Get off my case.” />
  “Get off your case?” she snapped. “We almost got caught, you stupid idiot.”

  “Shut up, daddy’s girl.”

  “Is that supposed to be offensive?” she asked incredulously.

  “If you weren’t such a daddy’s girl, he wouldn’t have come in here.”

  “Don’t blame him for saying good morning to me! You should have been out of my room as soon as we were done.”

  “Just calm down, alright? We didn’t get caught so shut the hell up.”

  “You shut up!” She slapped me across the face.

  I took the hit then clenched my jaw. For some reason, inexplicably, it turned me on. I grabbed her face then shoved her against the wall. Even though neither one of us had brushed our teeth, I didn’t care. I kissed her hard, and to no surprise, she kissed me back.

  A knock on the door made us break apart.

  Then they tried the doorknob. “Trinity, why is the door locked?” It was Skye.

  Both of our eyes expanded to the size of orbs. Since I was right next to the closet, I got inside then she shut the door quickly.

  Trinity opened the door. “I’m getting ready. What do you want?”

  “Wow…talk about attitude. Not a morning person, huh?”

  “Skye, what do you want?” she asked firmly.

  “Have you seen Slade? His dad can’t find him.”

  “Why would I know where he is?” She said it a little too quickly and a little too defensively.

  “I’m just wondering. They can’t find him anywhere.”

  “Well, I don’t know where he is, alright?” She shut the door quickly then locked it again.

  Fuck, could this day get any worse?

  Trinity opened the closet and looked like she might murder me right on the spot.

  “I’ll go out the window and pretend I was playing in the snow,” I blurted.

  “But you’re wearing what you wore yesterday.” She sounded hysterical.

  “It’s me,” I said quickly. “No one will question it.”

  She ran her hands through her hair in a panic. “If we get through this, I’m going to kill you.”

  “Well, if we don’t get through this, your dad is going to kill me. So I’m dead either way.”

  “Good,” she snapped.

  I opened the window then peeked around. No one was out and about.

  “Duck under all the windows so no one sees you,” she whispered. “Just walk through the front door.”

  “You act like I’ve never escaped out of a girl’s bedroom before.”

  “We’re on the second story, Sherlock.”

  “I’ve had worse, trust me.”

  “Shut up and go.” She slapped my ass.

  “Did you just slap my ass?”

  “Just go, Slade!”

  I put one foot through then looked back at her. “I’m coming over tonight, right?”

  Fire burned in her eyes. “That better be a fucking joke.”

  “So yes? Great. See you then.” I crawled out and shut the window before she could scream at me.

  I ducked as I moved around the roof, making sure no one could see me. Then I moved to the edge and peeked at the ground. It didn’t seem like anyone was around. I slid down a pipe then landed in the snow.

  I stood up and brushed it off, proud of myself for not getting caught.

  “What are you doing?”

  I stilled when I recognized my dad’s voice. Oh shit. I turned around and smirked. “Practicing my parkour. What else would I be doing?” I tried to act as normal as possible.

  “On the roof?” he asked incredulously.

  “You know me, I like a challenge.”

  He stared at me like I was crazy. “At six in the morning?”

  “When else would I have time to do it?”

  My dad seemed to accept my story. “Sometimes I wonder if your mother drank when she was pregnant with you.”

  “I wouldn’t put it past her. Or maybe your sperm was soaked in brandy and that’s where the problem started.”

  He shook his head slightly.

  “So, you wanted to see me?”

  He cocked an eyebrow. “How did you know that?”

  Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. “Why else would you be outside? You must have seen me practicing.” Please buy it.

  He did. “I wanted to order our gear before we got to the resort. What size are you?”

  Seriously? I jumped off a roof just because he wanted to know what size shoe I wore? “Eleven.” I tried not to let my anger come out.

  ‘Thanks.” He took out his phone then made the call.

  I rolled my eyes and walked inside.

  Everyone was sitting at the table eating breakfast. When Trinity saw me, she glanced at me then looked to her food. I sat at the end of the table and piled food onto my plate. No one questioned where I was. And I ate like I didn’t just almost die.

  ***

  We got our equipment from the front then stood in a circle.

  “Baby, Slade and I are heading to a black diamond.” He kissed my mom quickly then pulled away.

  “Be careful, Ryan.” My mom gave him a look like she would kill him if he didn’t come back alive.

  “Mom, we’ll be fine,” I said. “We know what we’re doing. Have fun on those sticks you call skis.”

  “Skis are a lot harder than snowboarding,” Silke argued.

  “No, they aren’t. A two-year-old could ride on those,” I snapped.

  “Let’s go before the kids pull each other’s hair,” my dad said.

  “Good idea,” my mom said. She wore a green beanie and her long blonde hair stuck out underneath.

  “Be careful,” he said to her.

  “Dad, they’ll be on the bunny hill. They’ll be just fine,” I said.

  My dad held his board with one arm. “Let’s go.”

  Everyone else was sticking with their parents. My dad and I were the only ones who preferred snowboarding over skiing. We were cool like that. We moved to the chair lift then let it take us to the very top of the mountain.

  “You want to race?” I asked.

  “Not really.”

  “Scared?” I teased.

  “I just don’t want to hurt your feelings. I know how sensitive you are.”

  I slugged him in the arm.

  “Was that supposed to hurt?” he said sarcastically.

  “Go to hell, Dad.”

  We reached the slope far in the back then finally got off the lift. Like pros, we moved off the lift easily then rode our boards out of the way of other people. We stopped when we reached a good part to drop in at. It was almost a cliff face. I smirked in excitement.

  “I can’t believe you aren’t wearing a jacket.”

  “It’s not even cold. It’s sunny as hell.”

  “You should still wear one.”

  “Then how will anyone see my tats?” I argued.

  “Maybe you should put them on your face if that’s all you care about,” he snapped.

  I shrugged. “I guess that would be cool.”

  He rolled his eyes then buckled himself in. “Ready?”

  I checked my boots then strapped myself in. “Let’s do this.”

  “You first.”

  “Dad, you don’t have to trail behind me. I’m a big boy.”

  “I like to know where you are. There’s no reception up here.”

  “Whatever, Dad.” I moved forward then pushed my weight into the dive. I picked up speed as soon as I took off. Like I’d done it a million times, I cut through the snow, shredding the fresh powder. My dad was close behind me. I could see him in my peripheral vision. He was pretty good, just as good as I was. There’s no one I’d rather go with than my dad. He was the only one who could keep up with me.

  I was going fast down the slope, faster than I ever had. It made me feel alive, exhilarated. When I cut through the snow, I felt like I could do anything. I didn’t think about school or life. I just thought about the moment I was in. Personally, that’s h
ow I thought life should be lived.

  When I reached hard snow that was practically slush, I lost control then slipped down the mountain. I was going so fast that I couldn’t stop. I dug my board in to slow down but it was too hard. It must be an area where it melted overnight and refroze as ice. There was no friction so I kept going. I dug my hand into the snow so I would stop. My skin burned from scraping against the ice.

  When I flew off the trail and into the trees, I started to panic. I’d never done that before.

  Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

  When I was about to hit a tree, I managed to swerve out of the way.

  Shit, that was close.

  “Slade, I’m right behind you!”

  My dad was there. Thank god. “I can’t stop!”

  “Dig your board into the snow!”

  “What do you think I’m doing?” I screamed.

  “Slade! Stop! Cliff!”

  Shit, did he just say cliff?

  Fuck. I tried to grab onto anything.

  All of a sudden, I felt something heavy land on top of me. I was pulled to an immediate halt. I felt hands grip both of my arms.

  “Son, are you alright?”

  I looked up and my dad was looking down at me with concern in his eyes. His nose was bloody.

  “Yeah…I’m fine.” I sat up then rubbed my head. “What happened?”

  “I landed on you.” He said it like it was no big deal.

  “How did you manage that?”’

  “I don’t know. I wasn’t thinking. There’s a cliff fifty feet away. If I didn’t do something, you were going to fall.”

  Holy shit.

  He wiped the blood from his nose then caught his breath.

  “Thanks…”

  “Yeah. Be a little more careful next time.”

  “I don’t know what happened. I just hit an ice patch.”

  Then I heard a sound that made me even more terrified than I’ve ever been in my life.

  A bear roared.

  My father and I both moved to our feet with a quickness that belied our ability. Twenty feet away was an enormous grizzly bear. He was on his hind legs and didn’t look happy to see us.

  Could this get any worse?

  “Give me your lighter.” My dad said it calmly.

  “Why?”

  “JUST DO IT!”

  I dug my hand into my pocket then threw it at him. “What the fuck are you going to do with it?”