by Hope Ford
Ray
The woman is dehydrated but mostly she’s about passed out from the cold. Whoever it is she came up the mountain with – I’m assuming Arney is his name – left her for dead. As I sit and watch the human woman sleep, I wonder if she realizes that. She’s pretty and brings a possessive side out of me that makes me want to forget everything else, the New Law, everything. I brush a piece of hair from her face, and she smiles, pushing her cheek into my hand as if she’s snuggling it. I sit there, just like that, not wanting to move and wake her. Even though it’s cold, her skin is warm to the touch, and I want to stay right here, just looking at her.
If she wasn’t already at risk of nerve damage from exposure to the cold, I would’ve carried her to my truck. I’m a fuckin’ bear shifter, it isn’t like the cold, even a blizzard, is too much for me.
I know I’ll be carrying her regardless because her ankle is wrapped and when I checked it out it was bruising pretty badly. The only favor the cold did for the woman was keep the swelling down in her ankle.
She’s not a slight woman, but still she brings out the protective instinct in me, and I can’t help wanting to know who it was that left her in such harsh elements to die. And who is he to her? Surely it’s not someone she loves. Surely this isn’t some kind of lovers’ spat and she’ll forgive him after this. I may not know her well, but already I can tell she’s not the kind of woman to put up with shit like this.
I force myself to leave her, because sitting here staring at her is making my bear go wild, and he’s clawing at my insides to get out. I step out of the cave and shift into my bear. It’s easier to hunt this way even though there is very little to hunt during the winter season.
I don’t get far before I’m trailing a wolf. As soon as he spots me, he stops and turns, circling me. He’s no match for me, I know I can take him, but there’s no reason to fight until I know if he is friend or foe.
Going on instinct, trusting my gut that this wolf is not an enemy of mine, I shift into my human form. Halfway through shifting, the wolf does the same.
I recognize him immediately “You are Raptor, from the Last Omens?” I ask him, recognizing him from the wolf shifter MC that was pushed to the Oregon side.
He nods his head, agreeing with me.
“You’re trespassing on New Law territory,” I tell him.
He bucks his chin up at me defiantly. He’s a younger recruit for the Last Omens. In the past, we would have run him off and threatened him to never come back. But ever since we’ve welcomed Mona, a wolf shifter, into our club, the level of rivalry has lessened. He seems harmless enough. “Have you heard of the missing girl?”
He nods once, looking around the forest as if I’m hiding her behind my back.
“I need you to go and see New Law, tell them that Ray has found the girl and to cancel the search parties. I’ll have her down when the blizzard clears.”
I expect him to argue with me, but he doesn’t. His chest puffs out actually, as if he’s thankful to be given something important to do. “Okay, I will go and tell them. Do you have food?” he asks me.
I shake my head. “No, I’m out hunting now. To take food back for me and girl.”
He reaches under a tree bush and pulls out a dead deer. “Here, I will split it with you.”
He says it proudly, and I know there is no way that I will tell him no. He gives me part of the deer and after I thank him, he shifts quickly and runs off.
I can’t help but laugh a little at the younger man’s desire to please. I drag the deer back to where I had shed my clothes and dress before going back to the cave. Luckily, the woman is still asleep. I strip away the hide of the deer and cook the meat over the fire.
4
Keri
The smell of food pulls me from sleep this time. I’ve never been much for meat, but after nothing to eat for what feels like a gazillion days, it smells delicious.
“Hungry?” the stranger asks me.
“Yeah,” I croak. Slowly, I sit up and then struggle to my feet. The man moves close to me, and I can tell by the way he watches me that he will not let me fall. I rein in enough strength to get up but have to use only my good foot to help as the other injured ankle hurts too much to try. I limp two steps before he puts a hand on my shoulder to stop me.
His touch is hot and branding even through the thick jacket I have on. My eyes jerk to his and they are so blue, it’s almost like they could glow in the dark.
His hand curls around my shoulder and he moves toward me. “What are you trying to do?”
I try not to blush, because I know I’ve lain here for how many ever days and don’t remember getting up to go to the bathroom, but my clothes are dry. Did he take me to the bathroom while I was out of it? “Uh, I need to use the little girls’ room.”
He smirks at my choice of words and bends at the waist, easily picking me up in his arms before walking to the edge of the cave, but still blocked from the snow. When he stops, he gestures to a makeshift toilet he made out of tree limbs and rocks. Instantly, I know I’ve been to this spot before.
He puts me down on my foot, but still holds me securely so I only have to stand on the one. He reaches for the front of my jacket and I do nothing but stare at his huge hands as they work at the zipper. Once it’s open, he reaches for the button of my pants. I cover his hand with my own. “We’ve done this before, haven’t we?”
He doesn’t smile, smirk, or try to embarrass me. “Yes, a few times actually. I’ve been forcing liquids into you, so I didn’t really have a choice.”
Little puffs of clouds blow out of his mouth with each breath. I can only stare at him as if his eyes have put me into a trance.
When he tilts his head to the side, I snap out of it. “I can take it from here.”
He seems to weigh my words carefully. “I’ll help you get seated, then give you a few minutes.”
Reluctantly, I nod and try to get through this without any further embarrassment.
When he carries me back into the cave, he sits me up close to the fire before going back to working on the meat.
“I’m Ray,” he says quietly.
He hands me a plate from my own gear. I don’t care he went through everything I had in the tent—he’s handing me food! Cooked, warm food!
I take a bite of the tender meat and it’s either the best food I’ve ever eaten or I’m starving. “I’m Keri.”
He doesn’t acknowledge that he heard me, but I’m learning that Ray is a man of very few words. It doesn’t pass my notice that he is enjoying watching me and is kind about letting me have all that I want.
“Is this deer?” I ask him.
He nods as he takes a bite and chews.
“How’d you find deer so late in the season?”
“Just got lucky,” he says.
Outside the cave the snow is falling heavily again, and it’s so thick it looks like a white haze curtain. “How long do you think this blizzard will last?”
“It’s still coming down strong. Probably through the night and into the morning.”
I nod, taking in what he’s saying. Another day, and I imagine walking out of here is going to be impossible. At least for me. “Hey, Ray?”
“Yeah, honey?” he asks. The endearment shocks me a little, especially coming from this big, gruff man.
“I’m not going to be able to walk out of here, am I?”
He looks at me curiously, no doubt wondering where my mind’s at. “No, you’re not.”
“So, uh, are going to have to leave me and go get help?” I hate the thought of being left on this mountain alone again, but I know there aren’t a lot of choices.
“No.” He shakes his head side to side as he strokes his hands through his beard.
I pull another piece of meat off with my fingers and then drop it on the plate. Suddenly I’ve lost my appetite. “So how am I getting out of here?”
“I’m going to carry you. Eat up. You need your strength.” He points at my plate.
“Carry me? There’s no way you can carry me off this mountain!” I exclaim in shock. Surely the man realizes that I’m a little on the heavier side, especially if he’s been carrying me around the last few days to use the bathroom.
He just smirks. “I can carry you. I won’t leave you, Keri. Not like your Arney.”
My mouth drops. “How do you know Arney?” There’s no way they’re friends. Arney and Ray, even if I don’t know either one of them really well, are nothing alike.
He shrugs, pointing at my plate again. When I pick up the meat, he waits until I stick it in my mouth before he finally starts to talk again. “You were calling out his name. I’m assuming that’s your boyfriend? The one that left you up here to die?”
His voice is hard, but he’s looking at me softly. “Arney is not my boyfriend. He’s part of the outdoor adventures club I belong to, and we were supposed to be camping. No one else showed up and when I refused Arney’s advances, he left me. I was probably calling his name for him to come back so I can kill him!”
“You’ll have to stand in line.”
As soon as he says it, I can see how much he means it. It’s almost like his hatred for Arney is vibrating off him. I want to tell him that Arney’s not worth it, but Ray doesn’t really seem like the type that cares.
He takes my empty plate from me and goes about cleaning up. He keeps watching me and already I can feel my eyes getting heavy. He doesn’t say a thing, just comes over and picks me up like I weigh nothing. I land against his chest with an oompf.
“Sorry,” he mutters.
I put my arms around his neck to hold on. “I’m fine.” His muscles in his chest and arms are flexed. “You probably can carry me outta here,” I tell him, appreciating his strength.
He stops and looks at me, our faces so close I can feel his warm breath on my cheek. “Yes, I can. I’m getting us out of here, Keri. You’ll be back to your life and I’ll go back to mine.”
I nod, but his words fill me with dread. What life? I wonder. I don’t have one. How is it that I can be stranded on this mountain with a stranger and this is the most alive I’ve ever felt? It’s like I can feel the blood racing through my veins. I don’t know why I do it, but I put my hand on his chest and lean in to kiss his cheek. His long hair and beard tickle my cheek and I smile when I pull away. “Thank you, Ray.”
He starts to walk then, setting me down on the makeshift bed he made for me. He doesn’t linger over me; as soon as I’m situated he walks away and finishes cleaning up. I can’t ignore how cold and alone I feel without his arms around me anymore.
He sits across from me and gazes into the fire, but every few seconds I can see him watching me. “Are you warm enough?”
“I’m fine,” I tell him, even though I’m still shivering.
“I know you don’t know me, but I don’t mind lying down next to you to lend you some more warmth if it’ll help.”
I know I’m going to say yes before he even finishes. I figure if he was going to force himself on me he would have done it by now. “Okay. Yes, I’m still cold.”
Ray walks toward me and gets under my blanket with me and the heat coming off of him is incredible. It’s like he’s a radiator. Soon the shivering stops. All I have left is a dull headache, but even that is bearable. With a full stomach and wrapped in the stranger’s strong arms, I fall asleep.
5
Ray
The snow is deep outside of the cave. I didn’t figure the snow would keep going as heavily as it’s falling. I should have gotten up in the middle of the night and gone hunting for food, but the feel of Keri against me had me staying right where I was. And when she reached for me in the middle of the night, whispering my name against my cheek, I couldn’t stop my arms from going around her and holding her. I’ve tried to convince myself that my attraction to her is because I can’t have her, but I know that’s not it.
In the darkness of the cave, I allowed myself to imagine a life with her. It’s like behind my closed eyelids I can see it all. We’re married with little cubs, I’m happier than I’ve ever been, and she is mine. All mine. It feels so real to me and it churns so deep into the pit of my stomach that my bear is craving to get out. He’s confused. That has to be it. He can’t mate with a human. At least I don’t think it’s possible, I’ve never heard of it happening before. Even though it feels like that is exactly what he wants. I fight him off as long as I can, before finally I have to try and drag myself away from her before I ravish her in my sleep.
I take one last look at her, unlatch my hands from around her, and start to get up. But she stops me with her hand on my chest and my name on her lips. “Ray.”
I should get up. I should go find food. I should be doing anything except for what I do. I cover her hand with mine and look down at her head resting on my chest. “Yeah, honey?”
I don’t know where that softness comes from. I’m not soft. I’m gruff, aloof, and usually can’t stand people. But she’s different, and she makes me want to be different.
She lifts her head and looks up at me. “It stopped snowing but there’s a lot of it out there.”
I can only nod, entranced by the look in her eyes. There’s something she wants to say but isn’t saying it.
She lowers her eyelashes and then looks at me wide-eyed. “I can’t ask you to carry me down a mountain in this. You’ll freeze in the time it takes. Leave me here. You can send someone to come get me.”
Does she really think I would do that? “I’m not leaving you.”
“But…”
I shake my head forcefully before putting my hand to her cheek so she’ll look at me and understand. “I’m not leaving you. We both go… together.”
She stares into my eyes for the longest time. I can see every emotion cross her face, and I realize she’s not even trying to hide it. Fear, loneliness, surprise, and eventually desire. The way her eyelashes flutter, the way she licks her lower lip and the way her nostrils flare, I don’t have any choice. One kiss. I just want kiss and then I’m going to let her go.
I don’t know who moves first, but when our lips meet it starts off soft and turns into a frenzied battle of emotion that overpowers me and my bear. I touch, taste and devour her, deepening the kiss until I’m not even conscious of the fact that we’re on a mountain, in a cave in a blizzard. She’s moving and before I know it, she’s lying across me and my chest starts to rumble, my skin starts to thicken, and I know my bear wants out. He’s thrashing on the inside wanting to claim her. I’m stunned. I’m a bear shifter. She’s human. I shouldn’t be reacting this way.
As gently as I can, I slide her off of me and jump up. My cock is erect and heavy between my legs. My skin feels like it’s crawling, but I can’t just walk out.
I walk to the fire to build it up. Neither one of us says a thing as I work, but the few glances that I give her, I know I’ve hurt her. Fuck! That’s the last thing I want to do.
I try to be as normal as possible. “I want to make sure we have enough to eat in case we have to stay in the cave. I need you stay here while I go hunting. If any animals come into the cave, use a log as a torch to frighten them away.”
She won’t look at me, but she nods her head.
I turn to leave but stop myself, unable to keep hurting her. “I stopped because of how badly I want you. That’s all, no other reason except for the fact that there are things you don’t know about me. Things that, if you knew, you wouldn’t want to be with me. That’s all.”
She’s watching me now, and I know she sees my erection, and she knows that I’m not lying: I do want her. She opens her mouth but closes it again quickly.
I get to the opening of the cave and turn back to her. “Remember, if an animal comes…”
She holds her hand up. “I got it.”
I nod and walk away from her, welcoming the cold brisk air as it hits me in the face. I’m hoping it’s a wake-up call and zaps me out of the trance, but it doesn’t. My desire is still there. I
still want the human in the cave behind me.
Once I’m out in the snow, I smell an animal nearby, but the scent is indistinctive. I shift into my bear form to better figure out what it is I’m smelling in case it’s an animal we can eat as food.
I get down a path a few feet when I see it. A mountain lion.
6
Keri
My heart is racing a mile a minute. I cover my chest with my hand as if that’s going to calm it. He’s worried about a wild animal coming in to get me, but he doesn’t realize that he can hurt me more than any animal.
When I woke up in his arms, I knew then. All night long, I had vivid dreams of our future and what it could be if we were together. Some of it was hazy and I didn’t quite understand, but the feeling it gave me, well, I woke up with it, centered right in the heart of my chest. There’s wasn’t any questioning it, not even now.
He’s nothing like the person I could have seen myself settling down with. He’s wild looking, quiet and a little gruff, and he’s bossy and demanding. But surprisingly, none of that matters to me. How can he be all those things, and I still want him? Can I base a future just on how someone makes me feel? Is that even the right thing to do?
All his talk about wild animals coming into the cave makes me feel like I need to get up off the ground and be ready to fight if anything does come along. So even though I could sit here all day and think about Ray and how he makes me feel, I need to concentrate on surviving this first.
I make my way around the cave. I still have a limp, but today I can at least put weight on it. I take care of business and then position myself in the cave to be ready for any intruders.
It’s quiet and it feels like hours have passed since Ray left. A fear crawls through me that stems from what I went through with Arney.
