by Lauren Wood
“Nowhere. I just want to stay home with you. Lay in bed. Mess around. You know that sort of thing.”
I don't know what has gotten into him but honestly, I really didn't understand Danny half of the time. One moment I thought I knew him well, and the next moment he was doing things that pretty much left me scratching my head, wondering what the hell just happened. This was one of those moments.
As soon as we woke up this morning, it was clear that he had something on his mind, so I didn't find out until later what it was.
“I thought you said you have a bunch of meetings today. Remember?”
He made a face for a moment and I could tell that he had forgotten all about it. Something had come up and I felt like he was keeping it from me. I wanted to know what it was, but I had no idea how to find out.
“I am not too worried about that.”
“Then what are you worried about it all of a sudden?”
“What do you mean?”
“Nothing.”
It all felt pretty damn shady and I told him whether he wanted to go to work or not, I was going to go. I wanted to get some things moved over to the new studio that he had put together at his house. It was a bigger space, better light and I was already thinking about all the good things I can do there.
But once again, he was holding me back for one reason or another. I wanted to know what it was, because I wanted to get on with my day. What he was describing was staying in bed for another day. We have been doing it for a while now. Too many times, if I was honest with myself. It was very easy to fall into bed with him and forget everything for a while, but I didn't want to do that. The last thing I needed to get kicked back into the black hole that could be Danny at times.
“Well whatever you decide to do, I hope you have a good day Danny.”
He opened his mouth like he was going to say something and then clamped it back down rather quickly. I just shook my head and I didn't even try to figure it out. I needed to get out of the house, get some fresh air and get back to my place for a little bit to pick up some things. After that, I wasn't sure what I was going to do, but I did have some orders that I needed to take care of later.
As I was leaving Danny’s house, I thought about how he’d been acting. The gameshow that we were on, started airing the night before, but we had both agreed not to watch it. The very last thing I wanted to do was see myself on TV. I hated the idea that I was even going to be on there, but it was comforting to know that the show didn't do very well. I honestly didn't know where it was coming up with the million dollars to pay the people that made it, but from what I gathered, only one couple in five seasons had gotten the full payout. I was determined that we would be the second.
Nonetheless, I knew that I was going to be one of those people. I was going to make it to the end and since me and Danny were getting along so well now, it looked like it was even more guaranteed.
I didn't get far before I found out exactly why my husband was acting so strange this morning. I was upset about what was written on the front page of the paper, or the fact that my picture was underneath it, but more than that, I was pissed off that he hadn't told me. It was obvious to me now that Danny knew about all the publicity, but he chose not to tell me. He wanted me to find out this way and I was rather livid with him for that choice.
After seeing my face on several covers, I did what any normal person would do. I bought every single one of them that I could find and put some in the car with me. I started leafing through the magazine, trying to find the correct page with the article about the tiny little TV show that was now making headline news. Apparently, the show had gotten some attraction because of the drama that was going on between the couples. And the first week, there were already two that were gone, but more than that, was the information that they had gotten on my husband. The fact that I was in the dark about it was played up by the gameshow and it had become quite a controversy that I really wished I wasn’t in.
The funny thing was, that according to all the articles that I was reading, our marriage was in turbulence and nobody knew if we were going to make it through the rest of the month. Until then, I didn't know that we even had any troubles.
For a second, I thought that it wasn’t going to be so bad. I don't know why, but the first article made it seem like it was a little scandalous, but not so bad. It wasn't something that I couldn't get through and get over.
The second article and the third one and the fourth one and the fifth one, seemed to have a completely different angle and they had done their research. Not just that, but they had gotten people from Danny’s past to speak up and do an interview. Obviously, nothing that they said was going to be good and it all turned into a big mess. I couldn't believe what was going on and I didn’t want to be around it.
But the more I read on, the worse it got. There were a lot of women in his life and his past was filled with many who were dying to get some attention. It was easy to do when there was a chance and I read about three interviews with some of his exes, then I was just done reading it. I was starting to consider if this was worth it or not. What had I gotten myself into?
The worse one, was the idea that he was already cheating on me. There were pictures of my husband leaving a place with a woman close behind. There were no kissing pictures, but I was sure it was only a matter of time before they came out. And of course, the woman looked a lot like Elaine.
Instead of working or being creative, all of my plans were shot for the day. I couldn’t think, and I wanted to get out of the space I shared with Danny. I didn’t want to think about him and the truth was that I was crushed. Not only did he have a past that was impossible to think about, but now he was cheating as well. There had been a while that we weren’t together, but that didn’t mean that I thought he was going to go out and get it somewhere else.
I went to my place and tried to collect myself, something that wasn’t so easy to do. I worried about so many things, but the real worries was that I wasn’t going to be able to stop myself. I’d fallen for Danny and now I was going to have to back away. It was too much. I’d let my emotions get the best of me. That was never the idea. Sure, I was supposed to get married, but that didn’t mean that I was supposed to fall in love with him. Now I had and like I knew from the beginning, it was a bad idea all the way around.
I sulked at my apartment and did something I said I wasn’t going to do. I watched the taping of the first episode and I was ready to end it all. I was never one to get attention and I’d known from the moment that they started asking questions, that the show was trying to spin something. I hadn’t known what, but my fake marriage was an even bigger farce than I’d given it credit for. Everything that Danny told me was a lie.
Chapter 87
Danny
I knew as soon as the first episode aired, that it wasn't going to be good. Not only was there a lot of drama coming my way because of the actual episode itself. I didn't feel the same way about it as Deirdre and I of course had to see it. It wasn't good at all. I knew that it was worse when I got some information from my lawyer for the company. It wasn't just the fact that they were trying to make it like I was cheating on my wife, but it hadn't been enough of a problem that now I was going to have to explain to my board what was going on. They did not like all of the bad publicity.
While I was worried about the board and my company, I was far more worried about Deirdre. She told me that she wasn't going to watch the taping of the first episode, but the fact was that she had disappeared, and I knew that wasn't going to come back. Something had happened, and I figured that it had to do with what was going on.
I started to get even more filled with anxiety when I saw some of the newspapers and magazines that were running their own version of the story. Not only that, but they had gotten ahold of some of my exes and of course they were not very happy with me. The fact that they were my exes, meant that I had decided that I didn't want to be with them and obviously that did not go over w
ell. I had never really dated, if the truth was told, but I guess in some of their eyes, we’d been together. I saw us as having some fun and they saw me moving on as me cheating on them.
The picture that was painted of me was not a pretty one, though I wanted to believe that Deirdre would see through it. I had to believe that, because the alternative wasn't something I wanted to think about. I had just gotten her to finally act like my wife. Now it was all going to change. Going on to the gameshow had seemed like a good idea at the time. It had seemed like the only way I was going to get what I wanted, but now I was starting to understand that it was going to cause more problems than anything else.
Since we didn't have as much household staff, it was harder to find out where Deirdre had gone. Before, I could just ask where she had taken off to or see where she had the driver drop her off. Now she’d taken off in her own car and I had no way of getting ahold of her. She wasn't answering her phone.
I wanted to go track her down, but at the moment I had to go to a staff meeting with the board of directors. They wanted to be assured that I hadn't went off the deep end and I knew that one of the main reasons they were upset, was because of the participation in the show. It was obviously something I should have disclosed to them before I decided to do it, but I wasn't thinking. My brain wasn't thinking anyways. All my blood had rushed to my dick and my brain was depleted. Now it was all blowing up in my face.
Trying to call Deirdre one more time before I went into the meeting, I left her a message. This was a third or fourth one that I had left in the last ten minutes. I had known that something was going to happen, and I wanted to keep her home with me, but I hadn't been able to. I wish more than anything, I'd been able to stop this but there was no stopping the news.
This was turning into madness rather quickly and I had to think about what was best for everyone involved. Maybe the gameshow was the best thing that I could have done to secure my wife, but now it was going to take her away from me. She wasn't going to just let this go. After months of working to cultivate this perfect relationship, it was all going to go to shit now.
I got into the room with the board members and looked around. A few of the people there couldn't even look me in the eyes and I had a feeling that this was going to be worse than I had anticipated. I was usually very prepared, but lately I'd been caught off guard several times. This is going to be one of those situations and all I wanted to do was figure out a solution, so I could get back to the real problem at hand, my wife.
“So here we are. Dustin, you are the one who called this emergency meeting, so I guess you can start us off.”
Dustin McClain had been with the board for a couple of years now and I knew for a fact that he wanted to change things. He didn't like that I ran the company and while most of them didn't like me personally or the fact that I didn't get every little thing passed by them first, they liked what happened at the end of the year when the pie was served. My results earned their livelihoods and Dustin was just going to have to learn like everyone else.
“Well Sir, I think we need to talk about the big elephant in the room. No one is sorrier to bring you here considering the situation, but I feel like we have to.”
He was saying all this for everyone else, more than he was for me. We both knew that he couldn’t stand me, and he wanted more than anything else, for me to step down and let them run the company. They wanted to run a company that I had made myself. They wouldn't have a job and they wouldn't have a board to meet in, if it wasn't for me.
I tried not to let any of this get in my head and smiled at him. I was known for losing my temper and today I was going to try really hard to keep it together. I was of course, trying to convince them that I hadn’t lost my shit.
“Of course, I am more than willing to hear your concerns, Dustin. Please go ahead.”
My words bolstered him a little bit and I just kept the grin on my face. He really would never do well in business and should stay in boardrooms because he didn't seem to be able to read the room very well. He certainly wasn't reading me. He thought that I was giving him leeway to air his concerns, when really, I was just giving him enough rope to hang himself. It didn’t seem to be all that hard to do and he stood up, starting to move around the room.
“Well we are very concerned about the fact that you got yourself into a gameshow that makes a mockery of marriage. Your customers are simple, hard-working people and we need to keep a wholesome image.”
I wanted to laugh or yell, though I did neither. We made money off the backs of those hard-working people. The company that I was meeting for now, was not wholesome at all. He was reaching at best. Dustin should have been more concerned of the fact that I hadn’t told them about the contract, as per an agreement we had. This part he was playing was personal.
“It is done. I should have come to the board, but it was last minute.”
He stared at me and I knew that he wasn’t sure what to say. Most likely he thought I would argue, he seemed to have notes prepared.
“Yes well, what are we going to do about it?”
“Well like I said before, it’s done, so there is nothing to do about it. You can complain about it and tell me that I should have told you. I’ll save you the trouble, you’re right. So, is that all?”
Dustin wasn’t too happy with me taking the wind out of his sails and that was almost worth the unnecessary meeting and drive down here. I could have been finding my wife and trying to convince her that this was all bullshit. It was. I wasn’t cheating on her, not in the least bit and I liked to think that something would be able to make this all better with her. But first, I had to get Dustin and the rest of the board out of my face. That was easier said than done apparently.
“You’re going to have to quit. I’ve been told that you’re still taping and since we’ve all seen where this is going, the board thinks that you should move on and get out of it before it can get any worse.”
That was not what I had in mind and I was taken off guard.
“I don’t know if that is going to be an option. I signed a contract.”
“Which we have looked over. You need to divorce your fake wife and get the company out of the papers.”
“I thought all press was good press.”
“Not when the stockholders are so nervous, and we have dividends and year-end reports coming out it isn’t. We have enough bad news to share, this is just icing on the cake.”
I didn’t know what to say to him, I really didn’t. He was right. I had dragged the company through this, but divorcing Deirdre just wasn’t an option. Something else was going to have to do it.
“I will think about it and get back with you. Good meeting Dustin, but I have some things I need to attend to. I will get back with you soon about how we are going to move forward.”
“If you want to move forward as CEO Danny, you need to get rid of her. It wouldn’t hurt to do an interview to rebuke some of it as well.”
I wasn’t going to do an interview, I knew that much. But I just nodded my head and left. The smile on my face was forced and painful. I wanted to believe that it would all work out, but I was starting to seriously question it now.
Leaving the office, I tried to call Deirdre again. I waited for the voicemail to pick up and then decided that I was just going to have to go to her house. I would track her down, one way or another and I was going to make this right. Screw the board. I wanted everything to be okay with my wife. I wasn’t going to give her up, not after everything I’d went through to get her.
Chapter 88
Deirdre
The banging on the door was hard to block out. It woke me up with a jolt, but I had no desire to go towards it. I didn't have to get up and look through the peep hole, to know who it was. It was Danny. I'm sure he had a lot of things to say, and a lot of ways that he was going to explain everything. He always had an explanation for everything but I didn't want to hear it. I had heard enough today.
If I didn't know it
was Danny, than I would have known when he started hollering my name. I hated to think about what the neighbors thought of all this, but it still didn’t convince me that I needed to rise from the bed. I don't think anything was going to get me out of this bed.
I’d fallen for the wrong guy and I was depressed, and it just seemed like the thing to do. The worst part was that the show had called several times trying to get a comment. Apparently, it wasn't enough that they were ruining my life, but they also wanted a sound bite to go with it.
It was all just too much, and I closed my eyes and waited for Danny to leave. There was no way that I was going to be able to face him right now. I didn't know what to say to him. I didn't even know if I wanted to talk to him ever again. I don't know why I was so mad, but I just thought that things would be different. I never thought he would cheat on me. Not after everything that we’d been through and how much I loved the man.
I hated the fact that I was in love with him, but I was. He had destroyed me, and I couldn’t trust that he wouldn’t do it again. Most likely, he was here to try and convince me that everything was just fine, even though it wasn't.
The one part of it all that I didn't understand was the cheating. If the show knew that he was cheating on me, then they would have ended it. It was very clear in the contract. If we were caught cheating on each other, then it was grounds to be kicked off the show. I don't know why that hadn't happened yet. And I had many videos of him coming and going with women, but apparently there wasn't enough proof. If there was proof, I would’ve gotten the call from Runaway Bride, telling me that it was over. It was a long shot, but it still game me some type of hope to think about it that way.
It was finally quiet outside and I thought that Danny had finally left. I was thankful, because the last thing I wanted to do was see him right now. I didn't know what to say to him and I didn't even know if it was worth it to keep going with it. If we were just going to get kicked off the show anyways, maybe there was no point to any of this. Maybe I should just end this farce that I've started. I really don't know what I was thinking of at the time.
