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Five Years to Live

Page 17

by Frank Zaccari


  Who wouldn’t be confused after reading all that? Companies wanted to make sure they were in compliance and needed to know what, if any, additional costs would be required to become compliant. Abilities Unlimited was retained by banks, business parks, casinos, hotels, government agencies, corporate campuses, et cetera. It performed audits and assessments of all business areas, including the slope of the parking lot, ramps, doors, bathroom, counters, and barriers. Once the assessment was complete, Abilities Unlimited would explain any discrepancies and provide an estimate for the needed mitigation.

  The new law kept the company busy. Mary handled marketing, sales, and negotiations. Michael managed the back office, subcontractors, and legal issues. Bill handled the assessments and direct interactions with the customers.

  Michael also found an outlet for his passion of working with students. He became involved with the Franciscan Renewal Center in the Phoenix area, working with confirmation students. For Catholics, confirmation is similar to the Jewish bar mitzvah; it is a rite of passage to adulthood. Michael loved working with the priests and friars at “The Casa,” as the renewal center was affectionately called.

  The Franciscans and the Jesuits appear to have different approaches to Catholicism. The Jesuits are the teaching or education order. They follow the teachings of Thomas Aquinas. Michael was educated at Canisius, a Jesuit university. In layman’s terms, the Jesuit theory has a more judgmental God. It appears to be more guilt-based, which many students who attended Catholic schools in the 1950s, ’60s, and ’70s would understand. The Franciscan approach, again in layman’s terms, sees God as more inclusive God. There appears to be less guilt and condemnation.

  Michael was explaining this concept to his brother Tony, a fallen Catholic. “Tony, remember how in most Catholic churches and schools when we were kids there was all this guilt? Don’t do this or don’t do that or you’ll go to hell. It was almost as if ‘good Catholics or Christians’ just associated with each other. There was very little outreach. Either you were in or you were out.”

  “Yeah, I remember. That is one of the many things that turned me away from the church. It was like God was standing in heaven with a lightning bolt ready to condemn you for every transgression.”

  “That’s what I mean, Tony. Now, when Jesus was on the earth he associated with what people? Think about it, did Jesus associate with the ‘church leaders’?” Michael answered his own question, “No. He had no time for them. Remember the Gospel where he overturned the tables of the church people who were selling things in the Temple?”

  “Yeah, I remember that,” Tony replied. “What’s your point?”

  “My point is, Jesus spent his time with what church leaders called sinners and outcasts. Look at the apostles. They weren’t church leaders. They were fishermen and tax collectors and people the church leaders condemned. Some described Mary Magdalene as a prostitute. Jesus spent his time with people like you.” Michael’s genuine goodness was inherent in his nature, as his friends and family could plainly perceive. So much so that even his seemingly harshest and heaviest words fell lightly upon them.

  Tony said sarcastically with a twisted smile, “Thanks.”

  “Now let me close the loop here. Jesus reached out and embraced people like you—people who were discarded by the church bureaucracy or felt unwelcome. Who are the outcasts for most church people today? Gays, couples living together, divorced people, and the most recent group of immigrants, right?”

  “Right!”

  Michael continued, “Well, at the Casa everyone is welcome. Everyone is made to feel comfortable and loved by God. I choose to believe in a loving and welcoming God. Not a harsh, vindictive God. There really seems to be a dichotomy between the Franciscans and the Jesuits.”

  “Well, I will give the Casa this,” Tony said, “I have never been to a Catholic service that was such a celebration. At most masses people seem to go through the motions just waiting for the priest to say, ‘The mass is over; go in peace’ then there is a mad rush to the door. The people at the Casa seemed to really enjoy the service. They were happy to be there. I saw a real sense of peace and love. People stayed around and talked for hours.”

  “Tony, God wants a relationship with all people. Most fundamentalist churches are divisive and try to exclude people. This is why I am involved with the Casa and the confirmation students. I don’t want another generation of Catholics to turn away because of the guilt complex.”

  Michael also became heavily involved with the women’s volleyball program at Arizona State University (ASU). After watching these gifted young women athletes play, he made it a point to meet Patti Smith, their head coach. Michael told her, “I don’t know much about volleyball, but I was so impressed with your team’s passion. I want to be involved as a donor and a booster.”

  Coach Smith was impressed that Michael sought her out. She told him, “Of course, any type of donation is greatly appreciated, but I am more interested in building a support group for the program. I’ve been looking for someone to take the lead—to write a newsletter; to help coordinate fund-raisers; to help me meet with potential donors.”

  “Show me what to do and introduce me to the appropriate people inside and outside the athletic department, and I’m your guy.”

  “Okay,” was all Coach Smith said. She was impressed but also a little skeptical. She had met many people who talked a good game, but Michael was not just talk. He wrote a preliminary newsletter and then met with the sports information director (SID) for volleyball to find out how he could get his newsletters posted to the volleyball website and distributed to fans. Michael put together pre-game handouts and actually sat in the lobby to hand them to fans; he started a raffle for a volleyball signed by the team so he could build a database of people who attended the matches; and he coordinated an annual potluck in the parking lot before a Sunday afternoon match. He was a fixture at every volleyball event. Coach Smith made arrangements for Michael to sit on the floor in the press section. Michael was known and loved by the players, coaches, parents, athletic department, and fans. Like everything else he did in his life, Michael was “The Mayor” at ASU events.

  Chapter 19

  Witch Doctor?

  For the next five years, Michael quickly became one of the busiest people in Phoenix and made friends with some of the movers and shakers. One night he was listening to Margaret Davis, who was running for City Council. Michael was impressed and contacted the candidate. He told her, “I like what you have to say and what you want to do. How are you going to execute your plan?” The two talked for hours. Michael made a donation to her campaign, attended events to register voters, and handed out her flyers. Ms. Davis won in a close election and then was re-elected by a large margin. Michael stayed involved and the two became friends. After her first re-election, Margaret asked Michael why he didn’t run for office. He told her, “My health is a major factor. I have to stay on a particular routine, which is not conducive to running for public office. Plus, I am from New York, and when I hear and see some of the stupid things most elected officials do, I am sure I will not use the politically correct language,” which made them both laugh.

  “I know exactly what you mean, Michael. But have you ever considered something like being a member of the Planning Commission? Each council member appoints one person to the Planning Commission. Since you are one of the smartest and have far more common sense than the vast majority of people I know, I would like to name you to the Northeast Planning Commission.”

  “So what does this entail?” Michael asked.

  “Well, proposals are constantly presented to the council to change zoning. For example, with all the growth in this area, there are proposals to build a church or a business center or whatever on land that has been zoned residential or agriculture. Before anything can be done, notices have to be posted and published giving the residents of the area notice of the requested change. The next step is for all interested parties to present their positions in a pu
blic forum, which is a Planning Commission meeting. The commissioners listen to both sides and make a recommendation to the council. I would like you to be my representative.”

  “How much time does this take?” Michael asked.

  “The meetings are monthly. Council staff prepares a packet with the agenda, the desired action, and pros and cons for you. You review the material, attend the meetings, ask any questions you may have, and make your recommendation. Staff members pick up your recommendation and return yours to me. You and I will often talk about your recommendation, then the council votes.”

  “Why do you think I would be good at this role?”

  “Well, Michael, first of all you don’t suffer fools lightly, which is your most endearing quality.” They both laughed. Ms. Davis continued, “You are able to listen to all sides of an issue, process the information, and make an intelligent and independent decision. You are an advocate for the disabled, you have a good understanding of what the impact will be on traffic, and the quality of life in an area if the zoning codes are changed.” Ms. Davis paused for effect before adding, “Plus, I trust you. ”

  Michael ended the meeting saying, “Let me sleep on it.”

  “How long do you need to sleep?” Ms. Davis said with a smile.

  “Let me talk to some people I know and trust. Can I get back to you in one week, Margaret?”

  “No problem, Michael. You know how to get a hold of me. I am looking forward to working with you.”

  “Hey, I haven’t said yes.”

  “Not yet, but you will. You have a big heart, Michael, and you care about people who don’t have a voice, or power, or influence. This is the perfect role for you.”

  One week later Michael Battaglia was named to the Northeast Planning Commission.

  At times all his activities would wear him out. While the Arizona weather was helping, he was still continuously plagued by UTIs. He was hospitalized twice. During one hospital stay, his primary doctor said, “You know, Michael, we try our best to modify and adjust your meds. We get one set of meds that seem to work well together for a while, then we start to have an adverse effect in one area. So we adjust again, which works for a while.”

  “What’s your point, doc?”

  “I have been reading more and more about holistic treatments. ”

  Michael looked at him and said with a laugh, “What are you talking about, witch doctors and ceremonial chanting?”

  “No, nothing that far out,” the doctor laughed. “I am talking about acupuncture, nutritionists, massages with oils and lotions, natural vitamins and supplements.”

  “Sounds like an old hippy party from the sixties. Do we sit around smoking pot and singing ‘Kumbaya’?”

  “Michael, I am a man of science, This is heresy for me to even consider, but I am seeing improvements in people’s health when this holistic approach is used with traditional medicine.”

  “So do you know someone?” Michael asked with interest.

  “As a matter of fact, I do. Here is her name and number. Why don’t you give her a call?”

  Michael thought about it for a few days before discussing it with Mary and his physical therapist. Both agreed it couldn’t hurt to make an appointment.

  Michael made an appointment. He was told, “Your body can do remarkable things when treated correctly. By that I mean by eating correctly for your particular situation. This often means a radical change in your diet. This is where most people fail. Most people are interested in the concept but won’t give up coffee or gluten or something else we suggest. If you are willing to do what it takes, I guarantee you will feel better.”

  For the next three weeks, Michael and “the witch doctor,” as he affectionately referred to her, ran tests to determine which food groups would help or hinder. The recommended diet was a nightmare for an Italian: red meat, pork, most bread, and glutens, plus coffee and soda were excluded. Fresh fruits, vegetables, baked chicken, fish, hummus, fruit drinks were all strongly recommended. Mercifully, an occasional beer or glass of wine was okay. Michael religiously followed the diet. When his parents were in Phoenix, they modified how they made the traditional Italian meals. Chicken and turkey were used for sausage and meatballs. Gluten-free noodles were used for spaghetti and lasagna. An Italian staple, Italian sausage and peppers, was modified to chicken or turkey sausage and peppers. The diet worked. Not only did Michael feel better, but he also lost weight, his digestive system worked better, and he had more energy.

  Michael checked in regularly with his doctor, who was also impressed. “I am very pleased with your progress, Michael. I would prefer to reduce the amount of meds if possible. This combination of medicine and voodoo seems to be working.” This comment made them both laugh.

  Michael continued to laugh as he said, “And the best part is I don’t have to sacrifice a yak in my pool or anything. I really do feel better. Now if we could do something to stop the UTIs.”

  The doctor looked at his last urine culture and said, “At least they are slowing down in frequency. We’ll keep monitoring this combination and see what happens.

  Chapter 20

  It Keeps You Running

  In September 1991 Donna and Tim Collins welcomed their first child, a daughter named Michelle. The choice of this name did not escape her sister Karen. When the two were alone at a family event, she said to Donna, “You can’t let this go, can you?”

  “Let what go? Honestly, Karen, sometimes you make absolutely no sense.”

  “Is that so? Let me ask you, who wanted the name Michelle?”

  “What are you babbling about now, Karen? Who wanted to name your son Jason? Jesus Christ, Karen, give it a rest. We like the name Michelle.”

  “I was just wondering how you came upon the girl’s name as close to Michael as possible.”

  “You have way too much time on your hands, Karen. I think the person who can’t let this go is you. I don’t know where you come up with these weird conspiracy theories of yours. If you want to solve a conspiracy, go find out who really shot President Kennedy.” With that Donna angrily walked away from her sister .

  When Karen was alone with her mother, she asked, “Don’t you find it curious that Donna named the baby Michelle?”

  “Stop it, Karen. It is no one’s business what Tim and Donna name their children. I am thrilled I have a new baby granddaughter, and you should be thrilled to have a new niece.”

  Karen started to say, “I’m just wonder…” but her mother cut her off. She angrily pointed her finger at Karen and said, “I don’t want to hear any more from you on this. It is their business, not mine and certainly not yours. Make yourself useful and mix up some more punch and keep your mouth shut.”

  Later that night after Donna and her mother put the sleeping Michelle in her crib, her mother asked, “Are you okay?”

  “Yeah, I’m fine, Mom. Sometimes Karen just needs to keep her mouth shut. Everything that comes into her head doesn’t need to come out of her mouth.” Donna took a deep breath and said, “Yes, I do think about him occasionally. I wonder what would have been. Haven’t you ever wondered ‘what if,’ Mom?”

  “I still do sometimes, sweetheart. It is normal to wonder what if, but after we wonder we all have to return to the present. I do totally agree with you that Karen does need a filter between her head and her mouth.” They both laughed.

  In October 1993 a sister named Courtney joined Michelle. Both families were thrilled with their two new princesses. With the exception of two maternity leaves, Donna continued to work for the Department of Social Services and was now a supervisor in the Child Protective Services area. She was still a passionate advocate for children’s issues and was very involved in all her daughters’ activities. As every parent knows, young children keep you running. Between work, children, and the day-to-day business of life, there is often little time or energy for your spouse .

  Tim was engrossed in a professional change. The calendar was moving toward the year 2000. The Delhi ar
ea was becoming more urbanized. Long time farming and ranching families were selling off their land to real estate developers. As the farms and ranches became housing tracts, the feed and grain business declined. The Collins family had to decide whether to stay exclusively in the feed and grain business or to move into something else. Tim was looking to sell the feed and grain business, but there weren’t many takers. Seeing the encroachment of homes into the area, the family opted to speculate in the housing market. The decision had mixed results. Between keeping the feed and grain business operating and working with the “spec” homes, Tim was spending sixteen-plus hours a day working. Tim and Donna were on autopilot. It felt like they were on a treadmill: they were running faster and faster, but the incline was getting steeper and steeper. Like many couples, there was little time for each other. Life was winning the battle. While neither wanted it to occur, they were growing further and further apart. They did what they had to do as parents with all their heart and soul, but the same passion was gone from their marriage.

  The economy started to sputter after the September 11 attacks. Finances and the marriage became more and more strained. Despite their best efforts, Donna and Tim separated in 2003.

  “We tried everything we could to hold the marriage together,” Donna said to her mother, “but at the end of the day, we were just going through the motions. The only things we talked about were the girls and what they needed. After fourteen years together, it was like I didn’t know who Tim was anymore, and I’m sure he didn’t know who I was.”

  “I could see you drifting further and further apart, especially when the economy turned so bad. You were both trying to juggle so many balls that it was impossible to keep them all going. ”

  “So what do I do now? I’m a forty-one-year-old single mother with two teenage daughters living in a small town where everyone knows my business.”

 

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