Five Years to Live

by Frank Zaccari

  “Well, if you must know, I am waiting to meet someone.”

  Joe’s daughter Marie said, “Well, we aren’t doing anything so we’ll wait with you.” The four girls all laughed and teased each other and their uncle. People would never guess that Michael never had children of his own when they saw the love and tenderness that he showed to his nieces and nephews.

  A few minutes after ten o’clock, a dark blue sedan pulled up to the hotel. When she stepped out of the car, he softly said, “She’s here.” His nieces looked at him then at each other, mystified. They asked him who she was, but he was too thunder struck to speak. She didn’t see him, so she started walking toward the front door. Suddenly he realized he hadn’t taken a breath since he first caught sight of her. He shook off the trance he was under and then answered his nieces, “She is the Ingrid Bergman that walked into my Casablanca.” In unison the four nieces all turned in the direction of his stare. They saw a woman in her late forties; her long, flowing, auburn hair was now sprinkled with the silver angel dust of her years, but her eyes still sparkled green to the second power. Marie, the only one who had ever watched the movie Casablanca, said, “It’s Uncle Mike’s long-lost love.”

  Her sister Kay, the only niece old enough to remember Donna, said with a gasp of surprise, “It is. How did you know that? You weren’t even born yet.”

  Stephanie, Tony’s oldest daughter, sighed wistfully, “Uncle Mike has a long-lost love?”

  “She is almost to the door,” Tony’s youngest daughter, Nicole, said. “Do you want us to stop her?” But by the time their uncle could answer, Donna had slipped into the hotel lobby.

  “Would you go tell her where I am?” Michael asked. All four of the young ladies hurried off to meet the woman who was having such an effect on their confirmed-bachelor uncle. By the time they got to the door, Donna was walking out with Michael’s nephews, one on each arm: Christopher, the groom, and his brother John, the best man.

  “You found her!” The nieces were thrilled. “Come on, someone wants to see you.”

  The nephews escorted Donna to the courtyard while the nieces trailed, giddy with so much excitement that they were barely able to contain themselves. The last few steps, Donna broke away and ran up to Michael, and they shared a long, tender embrace. When Donna straightened up, she asked, “So who are these good-looking young men and women that you hired to kidnap me?”

  Michael made the introductions, “These are Anne’s sons, Christopher and John.”

  “This is sweet baby Christopher who is getting married tomorrow,” Donna said in amazement. “I remember you. You spit up on me once.”

  “Sorry,” Christopher said laughing. “I was kind of young back then.”

  “But I still wouldn’t get too close to him,” his brother teased. “He hasn’t quite grown out of that phase yet.” This caused Christopher to playfully push his brother and mumble, “Shut up, asshole.”

  Donna smiled and said, “Oh yes, I see that wonderful Battaglia compassion has been passed on to the next generation.” Everyone laughed.

  Michael continued the introductions, “These two visions of loveliness are Tony’s kids from California, Stephanie and Nicole.”

  They exchanged a pleasant, “Nice to meet you,” but Nicole and Stephanie put a little more emphasis on the YOU.

  “And these other two visions of loveliness are Joe’s daughters, Kay and Marie.”

  “This is little Kay with the blonde pigtails?” Donna said in disbelief.

  “I traded in the pigtails for a husband and baby boy.”

  “So where is this beautiful baby boy?” Donna asked.

  “He’s probably taking a nap with his grandpa. Or what’s probably more accurate is his grandpa is taking a nap and David is playing with his toys.” This brought laughter from everyone.

  Donna said, “I remember Joey could sleep anywhere. ”

  Then Michael said, “My sister Mary’s daughter is not here. She is practicing being a flower girl. Her name is Lee Anne. Mary and her husband adopted her from China. So now you have met everyone, and everyone this is Donna.”

  “I thought you said her name was England Bourbon,” Nicole interjected.

  “No,” Michael said laughing, “I said she was Ingrid Bergman.”

  “Who’s Ingrid Bergman?” Stephanie asked.

  Marie said in frustration to her cousins, “Am I the only one here who has seen that movie?”

  Michael started to answer Nicole, but Donna waved him off and fielded this question herself. “Ingrid Bergman is a legendary Hollywood actress famous for her role as Joan of Arc and as Humphrey Bogart’s love interest in Casablanca. ”

  Michael gave Donna a look to let her know that he was impressed, and then they shared a longing, deep gaze. “Well, let’s get you checked into your room. Chris and John, can you take Donna’s bags to her room?”

  The mob walked Donna to her door. They all noticed that Michael and Donna could not take their eyes off each other. Then Kay said, “Well, ladies, we have a lot to do before the dinner tonight. Let’s give Uncle Mike and Donna some time to catch up.” Much to the dismay of the other nieces, Kay herded them back into the lobby.

  Inside the room, Michael said, “I have to tell you how impressed I was that you knew Ingrid Bergman, or as Nicole put it, ‘England Bourbon.’”

  “Well, thanks to you,” Donna admitted, “I am somewhat of an old movie connoisseur. I even write a blog reviewing old movies and talking about their relevance in today’s world. My first review was It’s a Wonderful Life with Jimmy Stewart and Donna Reed. I finally took your advice and bought a VCR and then a DVD player and a bunch of movies. I even watched all three Godfather movies, so now I understand what you were always saying. So tell me, is your brother Tom Hagen here too?”

  “Wow! I’m impressed, and yes, my brother Tom Hagen is here. His real name is Richard Howe, and you will meet him and his girlfriend Kelly Murphy tonight at the rehearsal dinner.”

  “I am invited to the Battaglia rehearsal dinner? How did I manage that invitation?” Donna asked, mocking surprise.

  “Hey, woman, I am the groom’s godfather, and you are my date for the event, so you now have access to whatever your heart desires.”

  “Well, thank you, kind sir.” Donna decided to stop the playful repartee. “How is your mother doing?”

  “She is hanging in there. She gets as much rest as she can during the day so she can participate in all the events. She wasn’t going to miss her first grandson’s wedding, but I will be surprised if she is still with us by Thanksgiving.”

  “Oh, I am so sorry to hear that, Michael,” Donna said with sincere sympathy.

  “It is what it is.” Then Michael changed his tone and the topic. “So tell me about your daughters.”

  The two former lovers shared the past twenty years of their lives. There was laughter, surprise, shock, and tears. The only interruption was when Tony knocked on the door and brought them food so they could continue to talk without any additional family interruptions. Finally at 3:30 p.m., after four hours of nonstop talking, Michael said, “ Well, dinner is at six. We are all going to meet at Tony’s room at five fifteen and then caravan to the restaurant. So I will let you get ready.”

  “Will you come and get me at five fifteen?” Donna asked.

  “I will be here and bring you to the family room. Brace yourself, everyone knows you are here, and they are all excited to see you again.”

  That comment made Donna smile. “I am excited to see them too.” As Michael left the room, Donna felt her heart flutter. Was there still something between them? Could the fire they once had for each other be reignited? Was there a chance they could walk hand-in-hand again or had the paths they had chosen put too much distance between them?

  At 5:10 p.m. Michael knocked on Donna’s door. She took his breath away when she opened the door. She was wearing a knee-length red dress that looked as if was designed for her. The dress hugged her curves and accentuated ever
y part of her body. Her three-inch red heels made her sexy legs look like they went on forever. Her long, auburn hair fell over her shoulders. She wore the gold necklace Michael had given her so many years ago, and the sparkle from her diamond ear rings was pale in comparison to the sparkle in her green eyes.

  Michael sat there speechless. Donna smiled seductively and said, “Is that look telling me I made the right fashion selection?” Michael just nodded his head, still unable to talk. He could not take his eyes off her. He finally took a deep breath and said, “I have never seen anything as beautiful as you are right now. ”

  “Good answer,” Donna said with a wink and a flirtatious smile. “Let’s get you into some fresh air before you pass out.”

  “You are absolutely stunning, Donna.”

  “Thank you, Michael. That is nice to hear.”

  They headed out to meet the rest of the family. Tony was trying to get everyone moving toward the cars. As they approached the room, Joe walked over and hugged Donna. “It is so good to see you, Donna. You look sensational.”

  “Thank you, Joey, it’s good to see you too. I met your daughters this morning. I can’t believe Kay is married with a baby, and Marie definitely got the Battaglia trait of quoting movie lines.”

  Tony laughed and said, “We watched hundreds of movies together. Come on in, my parents are looking forward to seeing you.”

  Anthony and Carm both lit up when they saw Donna. They both hugged her warmly and told her how happy they were that she came. There were more hugs and tears of joy from Anne and Mary. Mary introduced Donna to the other relatives in the room and finally to her precocious daughter Lee Anne, who asked, “So are you Uncle Mike’s girlfriend?”

  Donna laughed and said, “I used to be a long time ago.”

  Lee Anne put her hands on her hips and said, “Just so you know, I go out with Uncle Mike every Thursday.”

  Donna looked at Mary and laughed before saying, “Don’t worry; I will make sure I have something to do every Thursday.”

  All the meeting and greeting was interrupted by Tony announcing, “Okay, people, let’s get moving. Everyone, get with your drivers. Mom, Dad, Michael, and Donna, you are with me in the van.” The long caravan made its way to Chef’s to meet the in-laws .

  The rehearsal dinner was a joyful occasion for everyone. Both families enjoyed each other’s company and were truly excited that Christopher and Kristen were getting married. Watching how happy and at ease Michael and Donna were together, Kristin’s family all thought they were married. The nieces all cornered Tony and gave him the third degree. They all wanted to know if it was true that at one time Donna and Uncle Mike were going to get married. Tony explained, “Before the accident, Michael and Donna used to go out.”

  “So they didn’t get married because Uncle Mike got hurt?” Nicole asked with amazement.

  “No, Uncle Mike was very sick for the first three years after the accident,” Tony patiently explained. “The doctors told us that Uncle Mike probably wouldn’t live for five years. So he and Donna decided it would be best if they didn’t get married.”

  “So what happened?” Marie asked with excitement.

  “Donna got married and has two daughters who are your ages. She and her husband got divorced a few years ago, and Donna and Uncle Mike have been talking to each other. Donna is in town because her oldest daughter has her freshman orientation at Buffalo State University this weekend. Donna dropped her off this morning and will pick her up Sunday morning. So since she was in Buffalo, Uncle Mike asked her if she would like to go to the wedding. And that’s all I know.”

  “You’re lying!” Nicole said, challenging her father. “You’re not telling us the whole story. Did Donna come here so they could get back together?”

  “I don’t know. Since Uncle Mike lives in Phoenix and Donna lives here with her two daughters, it would be pretty hard to get back together. ”

  “I think they want to try again,” Stephanie added.

  “I guess we just have to wait and see. Why don’t you guys go see if Grandma needs anything,” Tony said, hoping his daughters and nieces would take the bait and he could get out of this conversation.

  Nicole glared at her father and said, “Well, since you aren’t going to tell us what’s going on, we’re going to talk to Donna.”

  “Okay, you do that. Let me know what she says,” was Tony’s answer as they walked off to see Donna.

  Michael brought Donna back to her room after the dinner. They talked for another hour before Donna said, “I have something to give you.” Donna pulled an old, tattered envelope full of creases and tiny tears out of her purse. She handed it to Michael, and he could see that written on the envelope was “Zuzu’s petals.” Donna then added, “I was wondering if you gave refunds.”

  “What?” Michael asked.

  Donna explained, “When you gave me these petals, you said that you were giving me my life back, the one I had before I met you. Well, since you are an old retail guy, I was wondering if I could give them back to you and you give me my old life back, the one with you in it.”

  Michael returned her question with a scared deer-in-the headlights stare. “Come on, Michael, why did you ask me to come to the wedding?” She said, beaming with hopeful anticipation. Michael still sat there in stunned silence. Concern started bleeding into her face as she continued, “Michael, say something, you look like a question mark searching for a sentence.” Michael opened his mouth to speak but could not find his voice. Concern quickly gave way to sheer panic and then settled into utter embarrassment. “Oh,” she stammered as if she finally realized, “I am so sorry...That was silly of me...I mean...I don’t even know if you are in a committed… ”

  Michael finally found his voice. “I am not in a committed relationship, but I had no idea you had any interest or desire to try again…you know, to try to be us again.”

  “I wasn’t sure when I first got here, but after spending the entire day with you, it feels so comfortable. It’s like the clock was turned back. Didn’t it feel like that for you, Michael?”

  “I am so happy we have this weekend together. Seeing you, talking to you is wonderful, but I am still a quad. That hasn’t changed. I’ve lived much longer than the experts predicted, but I still can’t give you the life you have. Donna, I will always love you, but so much water has gone over the falls. You have your daughters here. One is starting college and the other will be starting in two years. Your life is here with your daughters. My life is in Phoenix.”

  Donna took a deep breath follow by a sorrowful sigh. “My life didn’t turn out the way I hoped,” Donna said. “I mean, I love my daughters, they are my everything. My marriage didn’t turn out anywhere close to what you and I had talked about.” Tears started to roll down her cheeks.

  “There are no guarantees in life, Donna. You put yourself out there. You married a man who was considered a pillar of the community. You had several good years together. You have spent eighteen years being a mother, and you have raised two terrific daughters. That is a wonderful life. Anything that lasts fourteen years can’t be considered a failure. I couldn’t give you any of those things. I am so happy you were able to live the life you have. You have accomplished things I can only dream of. I am so proud of you.”

  “I feel like such a fool, Michael. I come here and throw myself at you without taking your feelings into consideration. I should just leave in the morning. ”

  “I hope you don’t feel like a fool, Donna, because you’re not. We had something wonderful many years ago. It was and may always be the happiest time of my life. I don’t know why this happened to me, but it is what it is. I would love it if you come to the wedding with me tomorrow. It will complete the circle for us. We were there for Chris’ baptism and tomorrow we will be there for his wedding. Please come to the wedding with me.”

  Donna tried to dry her tears. She looked at Michael and said, “I love you, Michael. I never stopped loving you.”

  Michael, who
was trying to fight back the tears welling up in his own eyes, said, “I love you too, Donna. I will always love you and what we had.” He paused to wipe away his tears. “So will you come to the wedding with me?”

  “Yes I will. I will be honored to go with you.”

  They kissed and held a long embrace before Michael went to his room for his nighttime routine.

  Donna and Michael attended the wedding together and had a wonderful time. Maybe they looked at this wedding as the one they never had. Early Sunday morning, Michael and Donna said what they knew would be their last face-to-face good-bye, and then Donna drove off to pick up her daughter. That weekend would forever be one of the highlights of their lives.

  Carm Battaglia entered home hospice care in August, less than one month after attending her grandson’s wedding. The entire family returned home in August to spend what they all knew would be their last time together at their family home. On September 24, 2009, with her husband, her sister Grace, and all her children and grandchildren at her side, Carmela Battaglia became a resident of heaven. Her love and devotion to her family will never be forgotten. Michael said during her viewing, “If it wasn’t for my mother’s undying love and commitment, I would have never survived the past twenty-four years.”

  The Battaglia family members continued their lives and traditions, but their hearts were a little heavier and the steps were a little slower. They continued to make the annual trek to Phoenix. Michael continued to defy the medical experts. In 2011 he met a wonderful woman. They aren’t sure where it is going to end up, but they are willing to see where it goes. On the Fourth of July weekend 2011, the family returned to Dunkirk for the Battaglia reunion. This reunion was more special than most. July 11 was Michael’s fiftieth birthday. It was the twenty-sixth year since the accident. There were many tributes given to Michael, but his brother Tony wrote the one that stood out: