Willa Cather

by Willa Cather

  A divorce was the one thing Edith would never, never, give him. She told him so, and she told his family so, and her father stood behind her. She would enter into no arrangement that might eventually lead to divorce. She had insulted her husband before guests and servants, had scratched his face, thrown hand-mirrors and hairbrushes and nail-scissors at him often enough, but she knew that Fred was hardly the fellow who would go into court and offer that sort of evidence. In her behavior with other men she was discreet.

  After Fred went to Chicago, his mother visited him often, and dropped a word to her old friends there, who were already kindly disposed toward the young man. They gossiped as little as was compatible with the interest they felt, undertook to make life agreeable for Fred, and told his story only where they felt it would do good: to girls who seemed to find the young brewer attractive. So far, he had behaved well, and had kept out of entanglements.

  Since he was transferred to Chicago, Fred had been abroad several times, and had fallen more and more into the way of going about among young artists,—people with whom personal relations were incidental. With women, and even girls, who had careers to follow, a young man might have pleasant friendships without being regarded as a prospective suitor or lover. Among artists his position was not irregular, because with them his marriageableness was not an issue. His tastes, his enthusiasm, and his agreeable personality made him welcome.

  With Thea Kronborg he had allowed himself more liberty than he usually did in his friendships or gallantries with young artists, because she seemed to him distinctly not the marrying kind. She impressed him as equipped to be an artist, and to be nothing else; already directed, concentrated, formed as to mental habit. He was generous and sympathetic, and she was lonely and needed friendship; needed cheerfulness. She had not much power of reaching out toward useful people or useful experiences, did not see opportunities. She had no tact about going after good positions or enlisting the interest of influential persons. She antagonized people rather than conciliated them. He discovered at once that she had a merry side, a robust humor that was deep and hearty, like her laugh, but it slept most of the time under her own doubts and the dullness of her life. She had not what is called a “sense of humor.” That is, she had no intellectual humor; no power to enjoy the absurdities of people, no relish of their pretentiousness and inconsistencies—which only depressed her. But her joviality, Fred felt, was an asset, and ought to be developed. He discovered that she was more receptive and more effective under a pleasant stimulus than she was under the gray grind which she considered her salvation. She was still Methodist enough to believe that if a thing were hard and irksome, it must be good for her. And yet, whatever she did well was spontaneous. Under the least glow of excitement, as at Mrs. Nathanmeyer’s, he had seen the apprehensive, frowning drudge of Bowers’s studio flash into a resourceful and consciously beautiful woman.

  His interest in Thea was serious, almost from the first, and so sincere that he felt no distrust of himself. He believed that he knew a great deal more about her possibilities than Bowers knew, and he liked to think that he had given her a stronger hold on life. She had never seen herself or known herself as she did at Mrs. Nathanmeyer’s musical evenings. She had been a different girl ever since. He had not anticipated that she would grow more fond of him than his immediate usefulness warranted. He thought he knew the ways of artists, and, as he said, she must have been “at it from her cradle.” He had imagined, perhaps, but never really believed, that he would find her waiting for him sometime as he found her waiting on the day he reached the Biltmer ranch. Once he found her so—well, he did not pretend to be anything more or less than a reasonably well-intentioned young man. A lovesick girl or a flirtatious woman he could have handled easily enough. But a personality like that, unconsciously revealing itself for the first time under the exaltation of a personal feeling,—what could one do but watch it? As he used to say to himself, in reckless moments back there in the canyon, “You can’t put out a sunrise.” He had to watch it, and then he had to share it.

  Besides, was he really going to do her any harm? The Lord knew he would marry her if he could! Marriage would be an incident, not an end with her; he was sure of that. If it were not he, it would be some one else; some one who would be a weight about her neck, probably; who would hold her back and beat her down and divert her from the first plunge for which he felt she was gathering all her energies. He meant to help her, and he could not think of another man who would. He went over his unmarried friends, East and West, and he could not think of one who would know what she was driving at—or care. The clever ones were selfish, the kindly ones were stupid.

  “Damn it, if she’s going to fall in love with somebody, it had better be me than any of the others—of the sort she’d find. Get her tied up with some conceited ass who’d try to make her over, train her like a puppy! Give one of ‘em a big nature like that, and he’d be horrified. He wouldn’t show his face in the clubs until he’d gone after her and combed her down to conform to some fool idea in his own head—put there by some other woman, too, his first sweetheart or his grandmother or a maiden aunt. At least, I understand her. I know what she needs and where she’s bound, and I mean to see that she has a fighting chance.”

  His own conduct looked crooked, he admitted; but he asked himself whether, between men and women, all ways were not more or less crooked. He believed those which are called straight were the most dangerous of all. They seemed to him, for the most part, to lie between windowless stone walls, and their rectitude had been achieved at the expense of light and air. In their unquestioned regularity lurked every sort of human cruelty and meanness, and every kind of humiliation and suffering. He would rather have any woman he cared for wounded than crushed. He would deceive her not once, he told himself fiercely, but a hundred times, to keep her free.

  When Fred went back to the observation car at one o’clock, after the luncheon call, it was empty, and he found Thea alone on the platform. She put out her hand, and met his eyes.

  “It’s as I said. Things have closed behind me. I can’t go back, so I am going on—to Mexico?” She lifted her face with an eager, questioning smile.

  Fred met it with a sinking heart. Had he really hoped she would give him another answer? He would have given pretty much anything—But there, that did no good. He could give only what he had. Things were never complete in this world; you had to snatch at them as they came or go without. Nobody could look into her face and draw back, nobody who had any courage. She had courage enough for anything—look at her mouth and chin and eyes! Where did it come from, that light? How could a face, a familiar face, become so the picture of hope, be painted with the very colors of youth’s exaltation? She was right; she was not one of those who draw back. Some people get on by avoiding dangers, others by riding through them.

  They stood by the railing looking back at the sand levels, both feeling that the train was steaming ahead very fast. Fred’s mind was a confusion of images and ideas. Only two things were clear to him: the force of her determination, and the belief that, handicapped as he was, he could do better by her than another man would do. He knew he would always remember her, standing there with that expectant, forward-looking smile, enough to turn the future into summer.

  Part V

  Dr. Archie’s Venture

  I

  Dr. Howard Archie had come down to Denver for a meeting of the stockholders in the San Felipe silver mine. It was not absolutely necessary for him to come, but he had no very pressing cases at home. Winter was closing down in Moonstone, and he dreaded the dullness of it. On the 10th day of January, therefore, he was registered at the Brown Palace Hotel. On the morning of the 11th he came down to breakfast to find the streets white and the air thick with snow. A wild northwester was blowing down from the mountains, one of those beautiful storms that wrap Denver in dry, furry snow, and make the city a loadstone to thousands of men in the mountains and on the plains. The brakemen out on their box-ca
rs, the miners up in their diggings, the lonely homesteaders in the sand hills of Yucca and Kit Carson Counties, begin to think of Denver, muffled in snow, full of food and drink and good cheer, and to yearn for her with that admiration which makes her, more than other American cities, an object of sentiment.

  Howard Archie was glad he had got in before the storm came. He felt as cheerful as if he had received a legacy that morning, and he greeted the clerk with even greater friendliness than usual when he stopped at the desk for his mail. In the dining-room he found several old friends seated here and there before substantial breakfasts: cattlemen and mining engineers from odd corners of the State, all looking fresh and well pleased with themselves. He had a word with one and another before he sat down at the little table by a window, where the Austrian head waiter stood attentively behind a chair. After his breakfast was put before him, the doctor began to run over his letters. There was one directed in Thea Kronborg’s handwriting, forwarded from Moonstone. He saw with astonishment, as he put another lump of sugar into his cup, that this letter bore a New York postmark. He had known that Thea was in Mexico, traveling with some Chicago people, but New York, to a Denver man, seems much farther away than Mexico City. He put the letter behind his plate, upright against the stem of his water goblet, and looked at it thoughtfully while he drank his second cup of coffee. He had been a little anxious about Thea; she had not written to him for a long while.

  As he never got good coffee at home, the doctor always drank three cups for breakfast when he was in Denver. Oscar knew just when to bring him a second pot, fresh and smoking. “And more cream, Oscar, please. You know I like lots of cream,” the doctor murmured, as he opened the square envelope, marked in the upper right-hand corner, “Everett House, Union Square.” The text of the letter was as follows:—

  DEAR DOCTOR ARCHIE:—

  I have not written to you for a long time, but it has not been unintentional. I could not write you frankly, and so I would not write at all. I can be frank with you now, but not by letter. It is a great deal to ask, but I wonder if you could come to New York to help me out? I have got into difficulties, and I need your advice. I need your friendship. I am afraid I must even ask you to lend me money, if you can without serious inconvenience. I have to go to Germany to study, and it can’t be put off any longer. My voice is ready. Needless to say, I don’t want any word of this to reach my family. They are the last people I would turn to, though I love my mother dearly. If you can come, please telegraph me at this hotel. Don’t despair of me. I’ll make it up to you yet.

  Your old friend,

  THEA KRONBORG.

  This in a bold, jagged handwriting with a Gothic turn to the letters,—something between a highly sophisticated hand and a very unsophisticated one,—not in the least smooth or flowing.

  The doctor bit off the end of a cigar nervously and read the letter through again, fumbling distractedly in his pockets for matches, while the waiter kept trying to call his attention to the box he had just placed before him. At last Oscar came out, as if the idea had just struck him, “Matches, sir?”

  “Yes, thank you.” The doctor slipped a coin into his palm and rose, crumpling Thea’s letter in his hand and thrusting the others into his pocket unopened. He went back to the desk in the lobby and beckoned to the clerk, upon whose kindness he threw himself apologetically.

  “Harry, I’ve got to pull out unexpectedly. Call up the Burlington, will you, and ask them to route me to New York the quickest way, and to let us know. Ask for the hour I’ll get in. I have to wire.”

  “Certainly, Dr. Archie. Have it for you in a minute.” The young man’s pallid, clean-scraped face was all sympathetic interest as he reached for the telephone. Dr. Archie put out his hand and stopped him.

  “Wait a minute. Tell me, first, is Captain Harris down yet?”

  “No, sir. The Captain hasn’t come down yet this morning.”

  “I’ll wait here for him. If I don’t happen to catch him, nail him and get me. Thank you, Harry.”

  The doctor spoke gratefully and turned away. He began to pace the lobby, his hands behind him, watching the bronze elevator doors like a hawk. At last Captain Harris issued from one of them, tall and imposing, wearing a Stetson and fierce mustaches, a fur coat on his arm, a solitaire glittering upon his little finger and another in his black satin ascot. He was one of the grand old bluffers of those good old days. As gullible as a schoolboy, he had managed, with his sharp eye and knowing air and twisted blond mustaches, to pass himself off for an astute financier, and the Denver papers respectfully referred to him as the Rothschild of Cripple Creek.

  Dr. Archie stopped the Captain on his way to breakfast. “Must see you a minute, Captain. Can’t wait. Want to sell you some shares in the San Felipe. Got to raise money.”

  The Captain grandly bestowed his hat upon an eager porter who had already lifted his fur coat tenderly from his arm and stood nursing it. In removing his hat, the Captain exposed a bald, flushed dome, thatched about the ears with yellowish gray hair. “Bad time to sell, doctor. You want to hold on to San Felipe, and buy more. What have you got to raise?”

  “Oh, not a great sum. Five or six thousand. I’ve been buying up close and have run short.”

  “I see, I see. Well, doctor, you’ll have to let me get through that door. I was out last night, and I’m going to get my bacon, if you lose your mine.” He clapped Archie on the shoulder and pushed him along in front of him. “Come ahead with me, and we’ll talk business.”

  Dr. Archie attended the Captain and waited while he gave his order, taking the seat the old promoter indicated.

  “Now, sir,” the Captain turned to him, “you don’t want to sell anything. You must be under the impression that I’m one of these damned New England sharks that get their pound of flesh off the widow and orphan. If you’re a little short, sign a note and I’ll write a check. That’s the way gentlemen do business. If you want to put up some San Felipe as collateral, let her go, but I shan’t touch a share of it. Pens and ink, please, Oscar,”—he lifted a large forefinger to the Austrian.

  The Captain took out his checkbook and a book of blank notes, and adjusted his nose-nippers. He wrote a few words in one book and Archie wrote a few in the other. Then they each tore across perforations and exchanged slips of paper.

  “That’s the way. Saves office rent,” the Captain commented with satisfaction, returning the books to his pocket. “And now, Archie, where are you off to?”

  “Got to go East to-night. A deal waiting for me in New York.” Dr. Archie rose.

  The Captain’s face brightened as he saw Oscar approaching with a tray, and he began tucking the corner of his napkin inside his collar, over his ascot. “Don’t let them unload anything on you back there, doctor,” he said genially, “and don’t let them relieve you of anything, either. Don’t let them get any Cripple stuff off you. We can manage our own silver out here, and we’re going to take it out by the ton, sir!”

  The doctor left the dining-room, and after another consultation with the clerk, he wrote his first telegram to Thea:—

  MISS THEA KRONBORG

  EVERETT HOUSE NEW YORK

  WILL CALL AT YOUR HOTEL ELEVEN O’CLOCK

  FRIDAY MORNING GLAD TO COME THANK YOU

  ARCHIE

  He stood and heard the message actually clicked off on the wire, with the feeling that she was hearing the click at the other end. Then he sat down in the lobby and wrote a note to his wife and one to the other doctor in Moonstone. When he at last issued out into the storm, it was with a feeling of elation rather than of anxiety. Whatever was wrong, he could make it right. Her letter had practically said so.

  He tramped about the snowy streets, from the bank to the Union Station, where he shoved his money under the grating of the ticket window as if he could not get rid of it fast enough. He had never been in New York, never been farther east than Buffalo. “That’s rather a shame,” he reflected boyishly as he put the long tickets in his pocket,
“for a man nearly forty years old.” However, he thought as he walked up toward the club, he was on the whole glad that his first trip had a human interest, that he was going for something, and because he was wanted. He loved holidays. He felt as if he were going to Germany himself. “Queer,”—he went over it with the snow blowing in his face,—”but that sort of thing is more interesting than mines and making your daily bread. It’s worth paying out to be in on it,—for a fellow like me. And when it’s Thea—Oh, I back her!” he laughed aloud as he burst in at the door of the Athletic Club, powdered with snow.

  Archie sat down before the New York papers and ran over the advertisements of hotels, but he was too restless to read. Probably he had better get a new overcoat, and he was not sure about the shape of his collars. “I don’t want to look different to her from everybody else there,” he mused. “I guess I’ll go down and have Van look me over. He’ll put me right.”

  So he plunged out into the snow again and started for his tailor’s. When he passed a florist’s shop he stopped and looked in at the window, smiling; how naturally pleasant things recalled one another. At the tailor’s he kept whistling, “Flow gently, Sweet Afton,” while Van Dusen advised him, until that resourceful tailor and haberdasher exclaimed, “You must have a date back there, doctor; you behave like a bridegroom,” and made him remember that he wasn’t one.

  Before he let him go, Van put his finger on the Masonic pin in his client’s lapel. “Mustn’t wear that, doctor. Very bad form back there.”

  II

  Fred Ottenburg, smartly dressed for the afternoon, with a long black coat and gaiters was sitting in the dusty parlor of the Everett House. His manner was not in accord with his personal freshness, the good lines of his clothes, and the shining smoothness of his hair. His attitude was one of deep dejection, and his face, though it had the cool, unimpeachable fairness possible only to a very blond young man, was by no means happy. A page shuffled into the room and looked about. When he made out the dark figure in a shadowy corner, tracing over the carpet pattern with a cane, he droned, “The lady says you can come up, sir.”