Heart of the Storm

by Nicole Stiling

  Her breath halted in her throat when she caught a glimpse of auburn hair, but it wasn’t who she was looking for. False alarm. She relaxed a little. And anyway, she really shouldn’t be so fixated on when and how Sienna arrived. Their conversation had closed the chapter on the two of them and whatever it was they were feeling toward one another. It was the right thing to do.

  Juliet felt a tap on her shoulder. She turned to see Officer Deagle behind her, looking sharp in his full-dress uniform.

  “Evening, L.T.,” he said, straightening his tie. “Chief wanted me to make an appearance. I thanked everyone from Salt Creek and grabbed a plate from out back. The chicken, broccoli, and ziti is amazing, try it. I have to get back to the station to hold down the fort, in Chief’s words. I’m sure there’ll be at least one noise complaint, since we’re supposed to get a thunderstorm later tonight.”

  Juliet laughed. They’d always get someone calling in about an explosion or fireworks, and they’d have to explain that thunder sometimes happened during the warmer months. It was a running joke at the station. “To be honest, I wish I was going with you. I’m not really in the mood for a feel-good community get-together at the moment.”

  “Your roof coming along?”

  “It is, yeah. Should be done soon,” Juliet said. She was thankful he led with that. She should have just wished him a good night and been done with it, but she’d felt the need to share her frame of mind for some inexplicable reason. “I’ll be fine.”

  Deagle nodded. “Stay for a little bit and then sneak out the back. Chief will never notice once he gets a few G&T’s into him. See you tomorrow.”

  “Hey there, Lieutenant,” a sultry voice from behind said. “You look amazing.”

  Juliet whipped around to see Kellie standing behind her, looking flawless in her black business suit. “Oh, hey, Kellie. You made it after all. You look nice.”

  Kellie narrowed her eyes. “Have you been distracted lately? I texted you a few days ago and never heard back.”

  “I am so sorry, I completely forgot. There’s definitely a lot going on. The case, family, fixing my house, you know the drill. Maybe we can catch up at work next week,” Juliet said. She wasn’t interested in getting together with Kellie in their usual way and didn’t want to leave that possibility dangling.

  Kellie seemed surprised but composed herself quickly. “Okay, we can do that.” Her air of professionalism returned. “I have to go say hello to the chief, so if you’ll excuse me.”

  Juliet sighed. She wasn’t trying to make Kellie feel minimized, but letting people down was something she could comfortably add to her résumé at this point.

  Juliet took a seat at one of the round tables, the white tablecloths making her nervous as she placed her wine glass in front of a place setting. She heard a familiar laugh and looked up to see Will standing at the entrance, shaking hands with Chief Quinlan and reintroducing him to Declan, even though Declan had met the chief at least fifty times in his short life. Juliet felt a surge of pride at Declan’s appearance. The kid cleaned up nicely. His sandy hair was combed back, and he had on a black dress shirt with pressed jeans and a pair of black dress shoes. She wondered if Sienna had assisted with that. Declan had never ironed anything in his entire life. Will was impeccably dressed in a suit, of course.

  She was about to walk over to say hello when the side door, the handicap entrance, opened slowly. Gretchen Kowalski and her daughter, Monique, walked in, Gretchen taking small, slow steps up the ramp while using a walker. Behind them, Sienna carried Gretchen’s coat and purse.

  Juliet swallowed hard, unable to look away. Sienna looked like she’d walked straight out of an expensive perfume commercial. Her hair was styled perfectly, with tiny wisps blowing gently in the breeze, her makeup was subtle but accentuated her features like she’d been airbrushed, and her scarlet A-line dress wrapped around her body elegantly, the soft chiffon swaying with her every move. She looked directly at Juliet, who realized she’d been openly staring. She dropped her phone and startled as it clanged loudly to the parquet floor. This was going to be a long night.

  Chapter Twenty-seven

  Seats were filling up fast. Sienna scanned the room for an empty table, but they mostly had at least a person or two saving a seat with a purse or a jacket. She looked over and saw Juliet standing next to a table, her gaze almost predatory, and her stomach jumped. The way Juliet’s waves, the color of sunset, draped over her shoulders and accentuated the hollow of her neck made Sienna smile. The night just got a lot better, and at the same time, a lot harder.

  Juliet seemed to notice that Sienna was looking for a place to land, so she waved her over while Gretchen was thronged by everyone in attendance with a mixed bag of condolences and encouragement. Sienna looked at Gretchen to see if she was okay, if she needed help, or if she just needed to sit down. She appeared to be doing fine, and Monique was standing a few feet behind her. Sienna crossed over to Juliet’s table and put Gretchen’s purse and jacket over the back of one of the chairs.

  “You look beautiful,” Sienna whispered, as she passed Juliet on her way to the hors d’oeuvre table. She felt Juliet follow behind her until they were in lock step.

  “So do you. I’m glad we had that talk earlier today, because I don’t know if I’d be able to contain myself otherwise,” Juliet said while she smiled at a firefighter across the room who gave her a wave.

  Sienna’s pulse quickened. “That’s not helpful,” she said, unable to contain a smirk. She took a few crackers and some cheese squares for herself, and a couple of spanakopita triangles for Gretchen.

  “Hello, ladies.” Will joined them at the buffet table. “You both look lovely. What’s a respectable time to bag out of here?”

  Sienna stayed silent while Juliet laughed and chided him for being a terrible member of the community. He nudged Sienna with his elbow.

  “That is not true. We ran the dunk tank in 2015, remember?” he asked, smiling softly at Sienna. “You collected the money and I went for a swim. Many, many times.”

  She smiled back at him, but the mixture of emotions that churned within, being sandwiched between Will and Juliet, was too much. “Yes, I do remember that. Declan saved up his allowance for weeks to take a shot at you.”

  “Big deal. I had to go to that carnival every single year and watch the mayor make an ass of himself at the water gun game and then come up with fifteen excuses as to why he didn’t win. It’s like Groundhog Day at that thing.” Juliet popped a pepperoni into her mouth.

  More than anything, Sienna suddenly wanted to get away. She felt like an intruder in a relationship that had overcome so much and had been so uncomplicated until she’d seen Juliet in a new light. Since then, she’d seen nothing and no one else. She breathed deeply and excused herself, nearly jogging over to Gretchen and Monique.

  Music started playing loudly, and people began to flock to the dance floor. If nothing else, the Salt Creek FD threw one hell of a party. She had to shout over the din for Gretchen to hear her.

  “I’m just going to grab some air, okay? I’ll be back in a few minutes,” she said.

  Gretchen nodded. “You were right, I’m glad I came tonight. The captain showed me a picture of a beautiful bench they’re donating to the library. It has a plaque dedicated to Rich, and on each side of it, a book is engraved. Isn’t that wonderful?”

  Sienna smiled genuinely and rubbed Gretchen’s shoulder. “It is. I’m sure it will get a lot of use too, which is exactly what Rich would want.”

  Gretchen patted her hand affectionately and turned to a few women from her knitting group who were waiting to speak to her. She seemed to be the belle of the ball even though the benefit didn’t have much to do with what had happened to her and Richard. Still, Sienna was happy for her. It was a much-needed distraction from all of the horrible things she’d been through.

  The sun had fully set, and a light breeze had taken hold. Sienna wished she’d worn a jacket of some sort, but she hadn’t planned on
being outside. She rubbed her arms and walked toward the veranda where an ornately decorated archway stood at the entrance. The ocean was crashing along the rocks, the steady hum of the tide providing the perfect soundtrack to the evening. Sienna wondered why she didn’t seek out the solace of the ocean more often. One of the hazards of living in a coastal town was taking the sea for granted.

  She sat on one of the built-in wooden benches, her legs crossed, and focused on the choppy waves. She had to move out of the house. It was time. Lines were blurred and she was tired of avoiding Will. Declan was still blissfully ignorant, and she didn’t have the heart to tell him that it was really and truly over, that the family unit they’d created was about to splinter. As much as Sienna had told him that things wouldn’t change between them, the reality was that things would change. Maybe not in their hearts, but their day to day lives would never be the same again.

  “Hey,” a voice said from behind her.

  Sienna would know that voice anywhere. “Hey,” she said, not turning around. She didn’t know if she could face Juliet at that moment. There was too much, and it was all at the surface, threatening to spill over.

  “The party is actually pretty great,” Juliet said. “Really well done for such short notice. And the wine is flowing a little too easily.” She swished the wine in her glass from side to side.

  Sienna didn’t think she could deal with small talk. “Yes, it is.”

  Juliet sighed heavily. “Okay, I guess I’ll go back in then. You probably came out here for some alone time, anyway.”

  A fast dance song was playing inside the hall. They heard a loud “whoop” come from the dance floor. Sienna turned to see if she could catch a glimpse through the window, but it was just a big blur of dancing and laughter.

  “You don’t have to go in,” Sienna said. “I should get back to Gretchen anyway.”

  “No, I’ll go. I just hate that we’re being all weird around each other. I miss being able to talk to you. It’s all so confusing.” Juliet ran her finger over the design on one of the pillars.

  Anger suddenly welled within Sienna. She knew it probably wasn’t sensible, but she couldn’t stuff it. “Where is the confusion? We put an end to our little charade earlier this afternoon.”

  Juliet stepped back, seemingly baffled by Sienna’s abrupt tone. “Our little charade? What the hell is that? I don’t know why you’re snapping at me, but that is totally unfair.”

  Sienna stood quickly, just inches from Juliet’s face. “That’s what’s unfair? What we’ve been doing to each other for the last couple of months isn’t unfair? How fair is it that I think about you every second of the day? I’m a middle-aged woman acting like a fucking teenager. How fair is it that I look at Will and I’m disgusted by the sight of him, because it means that I can’t have you? How fucking fair is any of that?”

  The air hung heavy between them. Juliet opened her mouth to speak and then closed it immediately. “It’s not fair, Sienna. None of this is fair.” Juliet hesitated. “You think about me all the time?”

  Sienna laughed bitterly. “Yes, Juliet, I think about you all the time. I think about what your lips taste like, and how good you felt pressed up against me. I think about the constant roller coaster of emotion you trigger inside of me. I think about how the two of us actually being together would cause a huge rift in everyone’s life and turn everything even more upside down than it already is, and that’s what makes this so hard because it’s all I want!”

  Juliet stood stock-still, her eyes wide. Sienna didn’t know what else to say, and she’d already said too much.

  They heard a loud knock on the glass and turned to see Celeste motioning for them to come in.

  “Well, of course,” Sienna said. Time to pretend everything was A-OK again.

  Juliet shook her head. “They can wait a few more minutes. Come here for a second.” She extended her hand.

  Huffing in frustration, Sienna clasped her hand and followed Juliet to a small area next to the building where decorative trees obscured the lights shining over the promenade. “The Way You Look Tonight,” the Tony Bennett version, was playing, and though it was slightly muffled, it served its purpose.

  “We are so totally fucked up right now.” Juliet closed her eyes. “You’re always in my head too. No matter what I’m doing. I have this weird pit in my stomach that’s filled with all these different things—guilt and excitement and fear and possibilities. That’s the one that I can’t escape. The one that scares me and electrifies me the most. The possibilities.”

  Sienna tried to fight the hot tears pricking her eyes. “Juliet, someone is going to come looking for you. Every police officer in a twenty-mile radius is inside—”

  “Shh,” Juliet said with a soft smile. She pressed her index finger to Sienna’s lips, and then dropped her hand to take Sienna’s hand in her own. She put her other arm around Sienna’s waist and pulled her close.

  Sienna began to protest. There were too many people nearby and there were too many sensations and too many emotions that could bubble over at any moment, and Sienna was afraid that if she let herself plummet into what Juliet was offering she’d never recover. But it was too much to resist. Sienna let herself melt into Juliet, swaying softly in the evening breeze, their bodies moving as one. She breathed in, the scent of Juliet more intoxicating than any glass of wine. Juliet dropped her hand lower, resting it just above Sienna’s panty line. Sienna didn’t know if she was trying to tease her, taunt her, but it was working. Sienna trailed her fingers up Juliet’s back, eliciting a shiver when she touched the bare skin beneath Juliet’s hair. Though everything inside her blared alarms and raised an infinite number of warning signs, Sienna kissed Juliet’s neck softly. Juliet leaned into her, tightening her hold on Sienna’s back.

  “They’re about to do the toast for Mr. Kowalski,” Declan called out, trudging along the stone path with his phone in his hand.

  Sienna and Juliet sprung apart as if they were polarized magnets. Sienna turned to see Declan staring straight at them. “Um, Mom?” he asked, sounding very much like a child.

  “Yeah!” Juliet answered, a little too loud and a little too enthusiastic. “Hey, Dec. I was adjusting Sienna’s dress. Her dress. There was something weird with her…dress. We should go back in. Gretchen will want you there for the speech.” She nodded to Sienna.

  “Definitely,” Sienna agreed, her heart beating so fast she wondered if it was possible it could burn itself out.

  They walked quickly toward the door, Declan still staring at them. His eyes were accusatory, but Sienna didn’t know if he’d actually seen anything, or if he was just questioning what he thought he saw. She hoped it was the latter.

  They managed to avoid each other for the rest of the night, even though they were sitting at the same table for half of it. Sienna was able to partially focus on the benefit as support for Gretchen. She’d been in and out of tears since Chief Quinlan had started the toast, and at least half a dozen other people had spoken up to express their respect, sadness, and confusion at the loss of Richard Kowalski. Even Monique brushed at her eyes a few times. It ended with the Salt Creek Fire Department presenting Gretchen with the bench in Richard’s honor, and the captain announcing the impressive totals collected toward offsetting the damage inflicted by the tornado. Aside from the gnawing havoc eating away at Sienna’s stomach, and the anxiety and tumult within her chest, it was a good night.

  Chapter Twenty-eight

  Before the twister had torn the roof off her house, Juliet had no idea how long it would take to replace a roof and make a house suitable for living once again. She knew the answer now: too fucking long.

  She walked into the house later than everyone else. Sienna had left with Gretchen. Will and Declan had taken off in Will’s car, and Juliet had stayed behind with the rest of her team. She was thoughtful and quiet, but she didn’t want to come off as uncaring. But she also couldn’t face getting back to the house and having to talk to anyone, so she s
tayed to help clean up even though she didn’t need to.

  Trying desperately not to wake anyone, Juliet took off her shoes and carried them quietly up the stairs to her room. She threw her shoes into the corner before flipping the light on. She nearly jumped out of her skin when she saw Declan sitting on the edge of her bed.

  “Mom.”

  “Jesus, Declan, are you trying to give me a heart attack?” Juliet asked, placing her hand on her chest.

  “You weren’t fixing her dress.”

  Damn it. She thought he might have seen something, but he didn’t bring it up again at the benefit, and patience wasn’t Declan’s strong suit. She cautiously assumed he hadn’t seen anything suspicious. It appeared she’d been wrong.

  But maybe if she kept up the pretense, he’d question what he’d seen. She didn’t want to gaslight her son, but neither she nor Sienna were prepared to have this conversation with their fifteen-year-old.

  “If you must know, her underwire was poking into her, and I was just trying to—”

  Declan shook his head. “Mom, stop. You weren’t ‘fixing’ anything. You were dancing. Like married people. I saw you.”

  Juliet rolled her neck back and forth. Just how much was she willing to lie to her son? She’d always prided herself on being open and truthful with him. And now she was destroying all she’d built with him.

  “Listen, honey, it’s not exactly what you think. We were out by the ocean and neither of us felt like going in. The music was playing and it was all romantic, so we thought it would be funny if we danced together.” Juliet swallowed the lump in her throat.

  Declan frowned, shaking his head. “There was nothing funny about it. I saw you. Why are you doing this to Dad?”

  “Come on, Dec. You’re overreacting. Sienna and I are friends.”

  “Really? You’re friends with Celeste, would you dance like that with her? You’re friends with Officer Deagle, would you put your hand on his ass?” Declan asked, his voice raising an octave.