Demon Dawn

by M. J. Haag

  My mouth had dropped open at the intense ache the friction had created. I was pretty sure I’d made a noise. A squeak? A mewl? I slid my hips forward again, rubbing against the erection that strained against the confinement of his pants. It was definitely a mewl that erupted from me.

  I rotated my hips, riding him through the material, and closed my eyes against the pleasure.

  Finally, he moved.

  One moment, I was on top; the next, I was on the couch, lying underneath him. His lips claimed mine in a kiss so hungry and full of need that I forgot to breathe. I wrapped my arms around his neck, sliding my hands into his hair, and held on for dear life. I tried to press up against him, but he was too far away. Even in this moment, he still managed to hold himself back.

  I tore my lips from him, panting, and looked up at him.

  He was breathing just as hard and placed his forehead against mine.

  “You are my air, my will, my life.”

  Then he was gone. The sound of the door closing told me he’d left the house. I blinked at the TV screen, and the reality of just how completely and desperately Thallirin wanted me hit.

  A shiver ran through me at the thought of what he would be like once that rule was no longer an issue.

  I was so comfortable and warm that I didn’t want to move. But, I did. Sliding my leg over Thallirin’s hips, I snuggled closer. I wasn’t sure what time it was or when he’d finally come home, but I was glad he’d decided to sleep next to me rather than continue to avoid me. Doubly glad that he only wore his athletic shorts.

  I rubbed my face against his chest, inhaling the smell of him, and felt his fingers playing with my hair.

  “This is a nice way to wake up,” I said.

  A sound of agreement rumbled through his chest.

  “Where’d you go last night?”

  “To find hellhounds with Merdon.”

  I jerked my head up to see if he was serious. His unblinking gaze met mine.

  “Why would you do that?”

  “There is much in this world that wants to take you from me. I will not force my will on you and ask you to stay here, to not risk yourself on supply runs anymore. To give you your freedom to choose, I will remove the things that seek to hurt you.”

  My heart squeezed in joy and in fear. He wanted to protect me so badly he would willingly risk himself in the name of an impossible goal.

  “Thallirin, you can’t kill every infected and hellhound out there.”

  “Not in one night. In time, my brothers and I will make this world safe again.”

  “At the risk of your own safety?”

  “My life has little value compared to yours.”

  “It has value to me.” I brushed my hand over the expanse of his chest then pressed a kiss to his skin. “I like sleeping next to you,” I said.

  “I like it, too.”

  I kissed him again, close to his nipple, and watched the scarred skin pucker. My fingers trailed around it and dipped lower, tracing over his abs and teasing the bare skin just below his navel. He didn’t try to stop me, but I could hear his heart hammering under my ear.

  “Can we have sex now?” I asked, not looking at him.

  “No, Brenna. You are not eighteen.”

  I grinned against his skin.

  “Do you like that I keep teasing you with kisses, anyway?”

  “Yes,” he said after a long moment of silence.

  “Will you tell me if I push too far?”

  “You will never push too far,” he said.

  My grin widened, and I sat up.

  “Good. Because I can shower today and need your help wrapping my leg.”

  He got out of bed and followed me to the kitchen. My skin began to tingle in anticipation. While he’d been gone, I’d given this plan a lot of thought. Now that I knew it was only my age holding him back, I didn’t feel quite as guilty over what I was about to do to him.

  Teasing him was exhilarating. Kissing him, even more so. Last night, I’d imagined what it would be like to finally give him what he wanted, and I’d discovered it wasn’t just about what he wanted.

  In the kitchen, I pulled out the plastic wrap and medical tape I’d prepared ahead of time.

  “I just need your help wrapping this around my leg and taping the edges. You might want to kneel. I’ll put my foot on the chair.”

  He did as I suggested, completely unaware of what I would expose when I lifted my foot to the seat of the chair. My shirt slid back and revealed the fact that I wasn’t wearing any underwear.

  Finally, I got to see his anguished expression.

  “The plastic can be tricky,” I said as he stared.

  He licked his lips, and his nostrils flared. Ever so slightly, he leaned in.

  My pulse started to race, and I decided anticipation might end up getting me before an infected did because Thallirin didn’t close the distance. He just continued to stare like he’d die if he blinked or looked away.

  This was the one thing all fey wanted. I couldn’t even count the number of times I’d heard them talk about “seeing pussy” in hushed tones. There was no doubt he was liking the view. But either he had a will of steel or I’d broken him.

  I took the plastic wrap from him and started unrolling it. After a moment, he woodenly helped. His attention kept shifting between what he was trying to do and what I’d exposed by lifting my leg.

  He managed to cover the stitches and tape the edges with his shaking hands then, finally, looked up at me with such need that I tingled with my own.

  “I’m not sure I’ll be steady without help,” I said breathlessly. It wasn’t a lie. I was lightheaded from the fast breathing and the need for him to touch me.

  “I think you’ll need to take me to the shower.”

  He scooped me up and carried me to the bathroom. He didn’t look away as I removed the shirt I wore then started the water warming.

  I reached in to test the water, then stepped into the glass enclosure. Hands trembling, I grabbed the shampoo and looked out at Thallirin.

  “Would you mind coming in here just in case I start to slip? I would feel safer.”

  He hesitated then reached for the door.

  “Do you want to take off your shorts so they don’t get wet?”

  “No.”

  “Okay.”

  I handed him the bottle of shampoo then wet my hair. When I looked at him again, he was watching the water run down my torso. I held out my hand.

  “Shampoo, please.”

  He passed the bottle back to me and watched as I soaped my hair and rinsed.

  “I’m not sure I got it all,” I said. “Will you help me?”

  He moved closer and ran his fingers through my hair. Water droplets gathered on his skin. I itched to lick him.

  “My leg’s starting to ache,” I said, putting it up on the bench seat like I had in the kitchen. His gaze flicked from my hair to my face.

  “And I’m feeling a little light-headed.” I set my hand against the wall. “Would you mind soaping up the rest of me?”

  “You need to stop this, Brenna. For both of us.”

  “Stop what? Wanting you as much as you want me?”

  “I don’t want you, Brenna. I need you. And your need will never match mine.”

  “Is that a ‘No’ to washing me?”

  He reached around me to turn off the water. I thought that meant playtime was done until he grabbed the soap and lathered his hands. He smoothed his hands down my arms and over my stomach. Then bent low to wash my legs, carefully avoiding my taped off stitches.

  I watched him, waiting for him to look at something other than the limbs he was washing, but he stayed completely focused on all my proper parts.

  “I like the way you touch me,” I said. “So carefully, like I’m fragile.”

  “You are fragile.”

  “Compared to you, I am. But I won’t break because you’re washing me, Thallirin.”

  He stood and turned on the water aga
in.

  “Rinse,” he said.

  “But you didn’t wash my chest.”

  “It’s already clean.”

  “But that’s not the point, is it?”

  His gaze finally dipped, taking in my breasts. His hand trembled as he reached forward. The heat of his palm branded me. My nipple hardened under his touch.

  “You’re wrong,” I breathed. “I’ve never needed anyone more.”

  He kissed me hard, his hand exploring the shape and feel of my breast. The water disappeared, and he stepped away from me, panting.

  “Your stitches will get wet,” he said, and I knew we were done.

  He opened the door and handed me a towel before taking one for himself. I followed him closely, stepping out and watching him. He’d known what I was doing. And I knew he’d only asked me to stop because he was worried about me. I wasn’t worried, though.

  But, seriously, how many times did a girl need to flash her vagina to talk a guy into sex?

  “When I came up with this idea last night, I imagined how everything would go,” I said, putting my foot on the counter and drying my leg, fully exposed.

  “I imagined you on your knees in the kitchen. Instead of just looking, you were licking. Then, we’d move to the bathroom, and I’d be the one on my knees licking. But, no. You’re too stubborn for your own good. And where does that leave me? Horny and more than a little desperate.”

  I started to carefully remove the tape. Everything underneath looked dry.

  “And the worst part is that you knew what I was trying to do and you didn’t walk away or tell me no. You tried to get me to change my mind. After all it took to get me here, to the point where I’m finally seeing the real you and needing you just like you wanted, you want me to go back to ignoring you.

  “Now, you can add frustration to the list. Horny, desperate, and frustrated.”

  I wadded up the plastic and tossed it in the garbage.

  “Are you done?” he asked.

  “Drying off? Yes. Venting? Probably not.”

  He picked me up and carried me out of the bathroom. I was still frowning at him when he put me on the bed.

  “Get dressed, and we’ll go see Mya and Drav like you wanted.” He pressed his lips to my forehead and closed himself in the bathroom.

  I threw my towel at the door in annoyance.

  “Stubborn,” I said under my breath.

  It didn’t matter. The shower had been plan A. It always paid to have a plan B, and Mya was it.

  When Thallirin found me in the kitchen later, I was already dressed and eating cereal with almond milk.

  “I’m still mad,” I said. “Marshmallow cereal can only fix so much.”

  He grunted and took a can of dog food out of the cupboard for himself.

  “You guys really like that stuff.”

  “It’s not as good as fresh meat but is better than pizza,” he said.

  I scoffed but didn’t argue. As soon as I was done, I put on my jacket and waited for him to pick me up.

  “We can stay here and have sex instead,” I said.

  We left the house, and I shook my head at him. Stubborn. But, so was I.

  Drav opened the door after the third knock.

  “Morning,” I said. “Is Mya around? I really need to talk to her.”

  Drav scowled at me.

  “You don’t get to look at me like that,” I said. “I still remember how you bullied me into staying home from a supply run because you felt I should be with Thallirin. Well, look who’s carrying me. You got your way. Now, it’s my turn.”

  The violent sound of heaving filled the silence.

  “Don’t care,” I said. “Everyone wants me to suck it up so Mya can, too.”

  Drav’s scowl grew a bit harsher, and his gaze flicked to Thallirin.

  “Mya is nicer,” Drav said.

  “Ha!” He obviously didn’t know Mya had been trying to guilt me into hooking up with Thallirin. Or maybe he did and just didn’t see anything wrong with it. Probably, the latter.

  “Let them in, Drav,” Mya said from behind him. “I’m done for now.”

  He stepped aside, and I saw Mya shuffle toward the couch. She was wearing pajama pants and a tank top, and her hair was in a bun on the top of her head. Overall, she looked like she was a sick mess.

  “Can I talk to her alone, please?” I asked once Thallirin entered with me.

  Both the fey grunted, and a few moments later, Mya and I were alone.

  “I need your help,” I said without preamble. “I did like everyone wanted and moved in with Thallirin. But, he won’t have sex with me because I’m seventeen and nine-tenths or some crap like that. You came up with this eighteen or older rule. You need to tell him it’s okay.”

  She leaned back into the couch.

  “I can’t.”

  “What do you mean you can’t? You were pushing for this.”

  “I know. But I wanted it to mean something for both of you. I never meant to push you into something you didn’t want.”

  “Who says I don’t want it?”

  “It wasn’t even a week ago that you were in here calling me—”

  “No need to repeat it,” I said. “I still think what you were trying to do was wrong. However, I’m with Thallirin on my own terms and not because of what someone else did or said. I chose. Well, I tried to, but he’s stubborn.”

  “I’m really sorry, Brenna. If you’re as close to eighteen as you say, what’s a few more days or weeks?”

  I snorted.

  “Easy for you to say. If you’re bitten, you don’t turn. Me? I’m headless.”

  Mya considered me for a long moment.

  “I can’t,” she repeated. “I have to think of everyone, not just you. One of the new survivors at Tenacity is only thirteen. I need to think of her, too. The rule keeps her safe.”

  “Then make a sub-rule. No one under sixteen ever and no one under eighteen without the consent of a guardian.”

  “And your mom would be okay with this?”

  “Of course. She doesn’t want me to die either.”

  “It doesn’t have to be a choice between sex and death, Brenna. You’re safe here.”

  I gave her the same look my mom often gave me when I said something stupid.

  “We’ve only had that one breach,” Mya said. “It was a fluke.”

  “No, it wasn’t. It was a calculated move by the infected and was successful. They’re not stupid anymore. They’re getting smarter. We need to get smarter, too.”

  “And lifting the under eighteen sex ban makes us smarter?”

  I shook my head at her blindness.

  “Once again, my fate is on you, Mya. When are you going to get tired of controlling people’s futures?”

  I turned toward the door and let myself out.

  “I already am,” she said before I closed it behind me.

  Drav and Thallirin were waiting on the front lawn. Both looked equally grumpy, so I kept walking. The whole situation was frustrating the heck out of me, and I was starting to feel stifled again. I tried to tell myself that no one was taking choices from me, but it wasn’t feeling that way. It felt like everyone was controlling the direction of my life but me.

  Thallirin caught up to me when I was almost to Garrett’s house.

  “Are you angry?” he asked.

  “Yep.”

  He didn’t say anything else as I knocked on the door.

  Zach answered a minute later.

  “Hey! Come in. Want some pancakes?”

  “No, we already ate. I was wondering if you and Garrett wanted to go trade with Tenacity again today?”

  “You sure you’re up for it?”

  “It’s not like there’s anything else for me to do.”

  “Okay. There’s a bunch of stuff that Julie set aside for us to take over. She heard that the survivors had some livestock with them and suggested we try to trade for that.”

  I followed him into the kitchen where Ga
rrett was manning the stove.

  “Morning,” he said. “How’s the leg?”

  “Stitched up and ready for adventure.”

  He grinned at me, but his expression lost all humor when his gaze shifted to Thallirin, who I knew stood just behind me. I glanced back at him and found him glaring at Garrett.

  “You don’t get to glare,” I said, nudging him. “If Garrett wants to be nice to me, he can.”

  Thallirin slowly looked down at me, his face darkening at an alarming rate.

  “No Garrett.”

  “Oh, shit,” Garrett said from behind me.

  “What the hell does ‘No Garrett’ mean?” I asked. “Like no looking at him, no talking to him, or what?”

  Thallirin picked me up, set me aside, and started for a very panicked looking Garrett.

  “Touch him, and I’m never sleeping next to you again,” I said, quickly.

  Thallirin slowed.

  “Touch him, and I’m moving back in with Mom and Uan.”

  Thallirin stopped just inches from Garrett.

  “I swear, I have no intention to be anything but a brother to Brenna,” Garrett said, retreating from Thallirin. “Ever.”

  I rolled my eyes in understanding.

  “I’m not interested in having sex with Garrett, Thallirin.”

  That broke the spell, and Thallirin turned to study me.

  “And I’m even madder at you now than I was before.”

  That took the remaining anger out of his eyes.

  Ignoring him, I sat at the table and waited for Garrett and Zach to finish eating.

  “Be thankful you’re not yet eighteen, Zach,” Garrett said. “After that, you’re squashable competition.”

  “I’m so tired of all this eighteen bullshit,” I said. “It’s a damn number to designate the average age most people attain a reasonable measure of adult-like maturity. It’s not a hard line.”

  “Something you want to talk about?” Zach asked warily.

  I looked at my younger brother and shook my head, knowing it wasn’t something he really wanted to hear. He was only asking to uphold the family rule to communicate.

  “No. I’ll spare you my life drama.”

  Fifteen minutes later, I was in Thallirin’s arms as he carried me toward Tenacity. We weren’t alone. Garrett, Zach, and I had run into Eden and Ghua at the shed. Eden had taken one look at my angry expression and volunteered to go on the trade run with us.