The Heroin Scene in Fort Myers

by Oliver Markus Malloy

  Veronica often joked that Lee County Jail had revolving doors. Most of the drug addicted girls were in and out of jail all the time. Girls like Snickers and Coconut were only half-kidding when they called LCJ their second home. Actually many of them were homeless on the outside, so they didn't even really have a first home. LCJ was it.

  When I met Lola at the Gulfview Motel, her mother Betsy was there, too. Betsy looked like she had seen better days. She probably used to be a pretty girl at one time, but the years of drug use had not been kind to her. Her dark, leathery skin and toothless smile was undeniably the face of an old crackwhore, who had spent a lot of time walking the streets. But she was well-mannered and polite. She welcomed me and said: "You're right Lola, he is handsome."

  Lola had told her mother about all the letters she had written me from prison, and her hopes to stay sober and live with me. Betsy was trying to be supportive, and to help her daughter have a better life than she did. That's why she was flattering me as soon as I walked into their run-down motel room.

  There were two queen-size beds right next to each other. Lola and I sat on one of them, while Betsy sat on the other bed. We all chitchatted for a while. Girls usually gain a lot of weight while they are locked up, and Lola was no different. I had seen older pictures of her on her Facebook page. She used to be skinny and beautiful. Now she was chubby and had a big gut that hung over her tight jeans. Her face was still pretty though. She was 25, had beautiful eyes and long brown hair. But she never smiled, because she was ashamed of her crooked teeth.

  She was nothing like I had pictured her from her letters. She had a harsh, masculine voice. To say that she was a bit rough around the edges would be an understatement. She couldn't hide the fact that she had grown up on the streets and never learned how to be a lady.

  I wasn't attracted to her at all. But I still wanted to go through with my plan to have revenge sex with her, to get under Veronica's skin. Since we all knew why I was here, I figured Betsy would excuse herself after a few minutes, and give Lola and me some privacy. But she didn't. She sat right there on the bed across from us, chatting with me.

  Lola was getting impatient. I guess I was supposed to make the first move, but I was too shy to bring up sex in front of her mother. So Lola decided to take matters into her own hands. Literally. She started playing with her shirt and adjusting her bra. I could see way too much of her beautiful breasts. They were covered in golden body glitter. It was impossible for me to ignore what she was doing. I told her that the way she kept playing with her breasts was really distracting. Obviously that was the whole point. She laughed and started massaging her breasts. Then she pulled her shirt and bra down, so that I could see her nipples. Her mother was sitting right there, laughing.

  "You like my tits?" Lola asked. "They got big in prison. I'm still not used to how huge they are now. Wanna massage them? I bet you'd like it if I massaged your cock with my tits. Wanna titfuck me?"

  I couldn't believe she was saying this stuff, while Betsy was sitting less than 4 feet away.

  "You want me to fuck you with your mother sitting right here?" I asked in disbelief.

  Betsy laughed and quickly interjected: "She's 25. She's a grown woman. I can't tell her what to do anymore. She can have sex with whoever she wants. So don't mind me. I won't bother you guys."

  Lola could tell I was really uncomfortable with the idea of having sex with her, while her mother was lounging around on the bed next to us, watching TV. She said: "My mom can wait in the bathroom while we fuck."

  This situation was so bizarre, it didn't even feel like the plot of a bad porno anymore. I felt like I was in the Twilight Zone.

  "Nah, I can't have sex with you while your mother is right here in the room with us, even if she's in the bathroom. She's still right here. That's way too distracting."

  "I can wait in the car outside, until you guys are done fucking," Betsy offered.

  "Perfect," Lola agreed.

  "Ugh, I guess," I replied. This was insane. But I had come all this way to have revenge sex with her, and I was only a few inches away from my goal. No point turning back now.

  While Betsy walked out, she winked at me and said: "Don't take too long. It's hot out there and my friend doesn't have enough gas to keep the AC running in the car."

  Lola took her clothes off and spread her legs, while massaging her breasts. I told her I needed her to suck my dick for a while first, because I wasn't hard.

  "I hate sucking cock," she replied. Then she sat down between my legs and did it anyway. I was sooo not in the mood. This was just crazy. She kept complaining that her jaw hurt, and that she wanted me to fuck her instead. The more she complained, the longer it took. Finally she got me hard, and I got on top of her. After I came, I just wanted to get out of there. She asked me if I wanted to spend the day with her tomorrow. I said sure, and left.

  She called me the next morning, but I didn't answer. I felt bad, but we just didn't click at all.

  LUCY

  "I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear."

  Martin Luther King, Jr.

  "A man reserves his true and deepest love not for the species of woman in whose company he finds himself electrified and enkindled, but for that one in whose company he may feel tenderly drowsy."

  George Jean Nathan

  I knew from Hussy's old stories that Lucy posted escort ads online. I went on Backpage to see if I could find Lucy's ad. And sure enough, there she was. I called her and we set up a date.

  I never call girls on Backpage, because I really don't like having sex with some random stranger. Especially not after I have learned how miserable girls who trick really are, how traumatizing it is for them to do this, and that they all have severe emotional problems. They're all on drugs, and they hate doing what they have to do to make money for their next hit. I don't want to be another one of those guys who hurts them emotionally by using them for my own pleasure.

  Another reason why I would never call some random girl on Backpage is because I have read too many articles about prostitution stings. Especially in Lee county. I don't want to end up getting arrested by a female undercover cop.

  But I knew Lucy wasn't an undercover cop. And these were extenuating circumstances. I wasn't really calling Lucy to get off, I was calling her to get revenge on Veronica. Getting off was just a side effect. Well, it seemed to make sense at the time. Like I said, I wasn't really thinking all that clearly at the time. It didn't even occur to me at that moment, how inappropriate it was to have sex with Lucy, after I used to date her stepmom for a year.

  Lucy was staying at the Holiday Inn. I knocked on her room door, and she let me in. She was beautiful. She was only 19, had long red hair, big beautiful eyes, and a warm smile. She had the sweetest little voice and an adorable laugh. She was like a Disney princess. She reminded me of Ariel, the little mermaid. I liked her from the first second I met her. Suddenly my revenge plot wasn't important anymore. I wanted to get to know Lucy, not just use her for my nefarious purposes.

  She was really easy to talk to. She had such a sweet personality. But she seemed distracted. I knew why. She wanted to get high before we had sex. She told me she was going to freshen up in the bathroom, and I should take my clothes off and get comfortable on the bed. She switched the TV to some softcore porno on Showtime and told me to start rubbing myself, so I'd be ready for her when she got out of the bathroom.

  I was masturbating for quite a while. The porno ended. She was in the bathroom forever. Finally I asked: "Can't find a vein?"

  "What?! What did you just say?" she asked from inside the bathroom. Then she came out with a surprised look on her face.

  "I know you're shooting up in there. It's ok. You don't have to hide it from me. I used to date an addict. I know all about it," I explained.

  "This is so weird. I go through all this trouble to hide my addiction from the guys I see. Nobody knows I do drugs. And you know all about it? And you're cool with it?"
she asked.

  "Well, I wish you didn't do drugs, because I know how miserable it makes you. But I know nothing I say is gonna make you stop, so just do your thing. I just figured it would be easier for you if you know you don't have to hide," I said.

  She went back in the bathroom but left the door open this time. She asked me to stand by the door so we could talk. I felt a little silly, standing naked by the door, because my hard-on was pointing right at her face, while I kept rubbing myself so I wouldn't lose my erection. Then I stopped, because I felt like a perv.

  "Keep rubbing your dick, baby, I'm almost finished," she said. She sat on the floor and tried to find a spot where she could shoot up. She said she was having a hard time, because all her veins were collapsed from years of use. I told her I knew. We talked and laughed for a while. Finally she was done, came out, and took her clothes off. Then she smoked some crack.

  It was weird to see her naked, after I had heard stories about her for 3 years. She had no idea who I was, but I knew everything about her. It didn't seem fair. I wanted to tell her. But at this point I had been masturbating for almost an hour, waiting for her to get ready. My dick was painfully hard, and I was so horny, I didn't want to have to explain stuff for hours right now. I really needed to fuck her first at this point.

  When she sucked my dick, it was better than anyone had ever done it before. She was so tender and gentle. It didn't feel forced or mechanical. She was just so sweet and sensual. Then I asked her to lie down and spread her legs. She had the most beautiful little breasts. They were even more perfect than Veronica's. It didn't take long before I came inside of her.

  Afterwards she went back in the bathroom to clean herself up and smoke more crack. She was still naked. I got dressed and stood by the bathroom door when I said: "I have to tell you something that might freak you out."

  She gave me a suspicious look in the mirror and said: "What?"

  "Even though this is the first time we met, I've actually known you for about 3 years," I said. As soon as I heard the words coming out of my mouth, I realized I sounded like a complete psycho. Like I had been stalking her for years or something. She probably pictured me lurking by her bedroom window, while wearing panties on my head and whispering, "my precioussss."

  "What do you mean?" she said with a nervous giggle. She was getting uncomfortable. This was getting weird.

  Then I told her about dating her stepmom Hussy, and that I knew it was weird, but that I hadn't seen her in a long time, because she had moved to Ocala.

  "No way," Lucy said. Now I had her full attention. She completely forgot about her crack.

  I told Lucy a bunch of private details about herself, about Hussy, her dad Dick, her sister Summer and their brother Little Dickey. I told her about her grandmother who had just passed away a few weeks earlier, and the trailer she had lived in. I told Lucy about her horses, her heart infection that had almost killed her a few months earlier, and that I had been Hussy's and Dick's landlord when they lived in my rental duplex in Lehigh Acres. Lucy knew right away which house I was talking about.

  "This is crazy! So you've been fucking my dad's girlfriend every day for over a year?" she asked incredulously.

  "Well, yeah, but I didn't know she was your dad's girlfriend. Hussy told me that she and your dad had been broken up for a long time, and that she wasn't even talking to him, because he's such an abusive asshole. I had no idea they were still together. And when I found out that she was lying to me about that, I broke up with her," I explained.

  "Yeah, my dad is an asshole," Lucy admitted. "But Hussy is a psycho. She lies all the time."

  "I know, her mom and her sister Ferrara told me the same thing," I said.

  I told Lucy that Hussy had told me a bunch of times that she loved me and that we had even planned to move in together, but that I didn't want to sign a lease because I didn't trust her, and then she ended up moving to Ocala. I told her Hussy had stolen thousands of dollars from me and I had almost put her in jail.

  "Oh my God, I remember all that! Someone called the cops on her and was gonna put her in jail. That was you?" Lucy asked, while laughing her adorable laugh.

  When I told her about the letters Hussy wrote me, Lucy made me promise to bring them the next time we got together. I asked her if I could see her again the next day. She said yes.

  Then I told her I had been dating Veronica for the past year and a half.

  "What?! You were the guy who always visited her in jail?" Lucy asked. She told me Veronica was obnoxiously arrogant in jail and acted like she ran the place. She said Veronica bragged that her boyfriend was a millionaire and he would do anything for her, because she "got it like that."

  I told Lucy that originally the only reason why I had called her was to have revenge sex with her, to get under Veronica's skin, because I knew they used to date. But now I actually liked hanging out with Lucy.

  "Huh? No, Veronica and I never dated," Lucy said. "She was hitting on me in jail and tried to date me, but I wasn't interested. I'm not into girls like that. Besides, everyone in jail knows how Veronica is. She's a total whore. She hits on everybody."

  Wow. So Veronica had lied about that, too.

  The following day I visited Lucy at the Holiday Inn again. I gave her Hussy's love letters. She read them and laughed: "Oh my God, I gotta tell my aunt!"

  She called her aunt and said: "You're not gonna believe this, but I'm with a guy right now who used to fuck Hussy every day for a year! Remember when she used to tell dad she had a job at a real estate firm? She was really going to this guy's house every day, and they had sex all the time!"

  After she hung up, I asked her if that was her aunt Nicole. She said yes. Then I told her Hussy had said that Lucy's dad had been raping Lucy's aunt Nicole ever since she was 4 years old. I asked Lucy if that story was true.

  "What the hell? My dad is an asshole, but he's not a child rapist," she said. "That's just one of Hussy's crazy lies again."

  We had sex and then Lucy told me she needed to get more drugs. She felt so comfortable around me, that she told me that instead of her going downstairs and meeting her dope boy in the parking lot, she'd tell him to come up to her room. She said she didn't want me to leave, and I could hang out until he was gone, and then we could talk more.

  Her dope boy called himself Las Vegas. He was a tall black kid with glasses. He tried to have swag and act like a thug, but he just looked like a dork. After he left, Lucy and I had sex again.

  Afterwards we just lay on the bed and talked for a while. She told me that her grandma had been her whole world, before she past away recently. Lucy felt lost without her. Her grandma had raised her. It all sounded very familiar. Both, Alice and Veronica, also had been estranged from their parents and both of them had been raised by their grandmothers.

  Then Lucy told me that Las Vegas was pimping her out. He rented the hotel room where she had sex with guys. She had to pay him a cut for the room each time she had sex, and pay him if he drove her to outcalls, and she gave him the rest of her money to buy drugs from him. So at the end of each day, after having sex with a bunch of guys, she had nothing to show for it, because Las Vegas got every last cent. And she owed him money on top of that, because she often did more drugs than she could afford with the money she had left.

  My savior instinct kicked in, and I just wanted to take her away from all this. I felt so bad for her. She was such a sweetheart. She was just a kid, but she had already been through enough traumatic experiences for three lifetimes.

  "If you want, you can stay with me tonight," she said while giving me a shy look.

  "Sure," I replied. I knew she desperately wanted to feel loved. She craved affection. Especially now that her grandma was gone.

  We spooned. She pressed herself as hard as she could against my body, grabbed my arm, put it around herself, placed my hand on her breast, and fell asleep cuddled up next to me, as if I was her blanket. I felt happy. I was so content, holding this sweet, beautiful girl in m
y arms while she was sleeping. There was no place in the world I'd rather be right now. I had completely forgotten about Veronica. And I think, for a little while, I helped Lucy forget about how much she missed her grandma.

  Later I read an interesting article about hugging. Medical studies have shown that hugs and cuddling are important for your mental health. They kill depression, relieve anxiety and strengthen the immune system.

  Hugs are healing. Cuddling is medicine. The heart rate slows, blood pressure stabilizes, and the immune system improves. Virginia Satir, a psychotherapist, wrote that we need four hugs a day for survival, eight hugs a day for maintenance, twelve hugs a day for growth. Hugging increases oxytocin, especially in women.

  Studies have shown a link between oxytocin and the ability to achieve orgasm, positive social behavior, pair bonding, anxiety, and maternal behaviors. It is sometimes referred to as the “love hormone.” A lack of oxytocin has been associated with maladaptive social traits such as depression, anxiety, aggressive behavior and drug use.