“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“You weren’t in a mood to listen.”
“Not after you cheated.” He winced, but I waved my words off. I didn’t want a trip down that particular memory lane any more than he did. “It’s all in the past. You two are here for the kids, and that’s the way it should be. I won’t interfere, and I’ll try to encourage Conner to be open to seeing you.”
“I appreciate it. I’ve missed him.” The air around us stilled as more people disappeared inside the rink to get a seat. “How’ve you been?” he asked quietly.
“Honestly, I was just okay for a long time. It was hard, but I’m good now. I think Conner playing hockey again was good for both of us.”
“Good.”
I looked at him. Really looked. He was worried. For Conner. For me. For his new wife. He wasn’t the same Kyle, he’d changed. He seemed more…mature.
“There’s no hostility on my end,” I assured him. “I mean, I’m not going to invite you two over to dinner. But I promise I won’t ever stand in the way of you and Conner.”
“I wouldn’t mind… I wouldn’t mind if you help keep me updated on him. Just a quick message is all. I don’t want to demand too much.”
“I can do that. I want you two to have a good relationship.”
The game was going to start any second. I headed for the door, but Kyle hung back. Almost everyone was inside the rink.
“Hey, Kyle.” When he turned, I said, “I spent a year and a half avoiding stares and gossip. I’m so over it. Why don’t we walk in together and make them talk?”
His burgeoning smile signaled a shift between us. Less estranged exes and more partners in our child’s life.
I breezed inside, my head held high. Three days with both of my exes. No problem.
Chapter 9
The next test of my strength and commitment to “fuck them” was supper. My group of parents wanted to eat where the team went, which was a buffet-style restaurant. Perfect for a crowd of hungry athletes. Less perfect for a grown woman who wanted to hide in the corner.
I wasn’t worried about Kyle being there, or seeing him with Carrie, although crossing paths with her wouldn’t be a walk in the park. It was Hayden. He’d sit with his assistant coaches, but we’d all be in the same restaurant.
I almost ducked out, telling my friends I had a headache and would go back to my room.
But here I was. Grace had ridden with me so we could talk in private about my situation and the weekend. By some stroke of luck, we were seated in a booth for two.
The team hadn’t arrived yet. My phone pinged with a message.
Kyle. We’re skipping out on supper. Thought I’d let you know.
I replied, Thanks, floored at his thoughtfulness. To Grace, I said, “Kyle and Carrie aren’t coming here.”
“That’ll help.”
Movement out the window caught our attention. A large white school bus pulled into the lot. Prairie Mills Snowbirds was emblazoned on the side.
“Here they come,” she murmured. “I guess we can get our food any time. And we’d better get there before a swarm of hungry teens.” She scooted out of the booth.
I followed her and loaded my plate. Out of the corner of my eye, I watched the players pile in, all wearing their black and red warmups. The coaches were gathered around the manager who was pointing to where they’d all sit. Across from the restaurant from me. Before my gaze could land for too long on Hayden’s square profile and the way the fluorescent lights of the place made his eyes shine, I went back to the booth.
I managed to grab my food and get back to the booth before the players swarmed the buffet. Grace had already returned.
She speared a chicken thigh with her fork. “Did you see where they’re sitting?”
I set my plate down and sat, gratitude filling my chest until I thought I’d suffocate. “In case I haven’t told you how much I appreciate you being here for me, I’d better do it now. Thank you, Grace. I can’t imagine doing this without you.”
“No one should have to face life alone just because a man decided he’s moving on.”
I stared at her. “Oh my god, I think I love you.”
She winked and tore her chicken apart. “I’m not saying we need to be attached at the hip, but I remember my Grandma Alejandra after Grandpa died. You know what kept her going? Her weekly bridge club. Those ladies stuck it out through the loss of spouses, children, and each other. After my divorce, I decided I needed my own bridge group.” She paused, her fork dangling from her hand. “But it wasn’t that easy. The only other member is you. And maybe Laurie, but it’s not like an official thing. I don’t even know how to play bridge.”
“What we need is to meet outside of hockey. We need to meet when life is wild and we can’t tell which way is left. We need to be each other’s rocks.” It was perfect timing. Our kids were going to graduate next year. Jordan and Korey were the youngest of their families. We’d be busy, but not like when the kids were little.
“Let’s do it.”
I demolished my plate, thankful that the stress of the day hadn’t cost me my appetite. Prairie Mills didn’t have a restaurant like this.
I slid my empty plate to the edge of the table. “I’m going back for dessert. Want me to bring you anything?”
“Three of those cream puff things. They’re my weakness.”
At the food line, I selected her choice first and decided on a scoop of ice cream for myself, which was on the opposite end of the selections. Spinning around, I gasped and clutched the plate toward my chest before I smacked into a someone. A tall someone.
As my head tipped, the pizza I’d eaten suddenly weighed more than a pallet of bricks.
Hayden was holding his own plate up and to the side to keep it from dumping on my chest. “Jess, sorry.”
“No problem,” I mumbled and darted around him. My heart pounded with a ferocious ache. Why had I fallen for him? Why couldn’t it just be sex to me? But I’d really liked him. I’d been close to more than liking him.
He pivoted the same direction I was going and my back tingled, like he was watching me and wanted to say something, but I didn’t stop.
I dropped into the booth, handing the plate to Grace.
She looked it over and eyed me. “Decided to pass on dessert?”
“He was there. I almost cream puffed him.”
“While I hate to waste a good dessert, it would’ve been for a worthy cause. What do you want?”
“Hmm?” My mind was stuck on how the surprise turned to longing in his eyes and how damn good he looked. He’d tossed on the team warmup coat, the one that made his shoulders impossibly wide.
“Cake, ice cream, pie?” Grace asked. “Whatever you want, I’ll go get it.”
A familiar burned crested across my back. His eyes were on me. My body was programmed to be attuned to his attention. I swallowed. “Ice cream. I was going to get some ice cream.”
Grace’s eyes narrowed. “Are you going to be okay?”
“It was unexpected.”
She nodded and left and I didn’t even bother to look like I was having a grand old time by myself at the booth. All those emotions, all those hopes. Just like my body was primed for his touch, it didn’t connect with my brain and go, Oh, okay. We’re done with him. Instead, I yearned for him, knowing full well it was over. I saw him and I hoped. It was cruel.
At the time, when Kyle had left town after he left me I thought he was cold and cruel, but he’d done me a service. Even if I didn’t think I would’ve reacted this strongly to him after our separation.
A shadow fell over me, and I tensed, but it was Conner.
“Did you see Dad was here?” His hair stood out like he modeled it after a porcupine, but his grave expression should only be for middle-agers.
“Yes, actually I talked to him.”
His jaw tensed and concern brimmed in the depths of his brown irises.
I put my hand on his arm. “And it’s oka
y. It’s going to be okay. We’re civil and we’ve moved on.”
Conner studied me like I’d done so many times to him over his life. Like he was trying to detect a lie. “It’s okay?”
I smiled. “I’m really glad he made it. I think that as long as he knows I won’t make an issue of it, he’ll try to come see you more often. And I encouraged it.”
He scanned the restaurant. “He said he’s staying all weekend.”
“Good. And I mean it. We both support you. He said he and Carrie weren’t coming here to eat though. Figured it’d be too much too soon.”
Conner’s jaw tightened, but then he relaxed and relief passed through his features. “Yeah, it was nice to see him.”
I will not cry. “Talk to him. See if you two can get together before he has to leave. My schedule is flexible.” I’d make sure it was.
“Thanks, Mom.” He went back to his group of friends just as Grace came back.
She’d topped my ice cream with an obscene amount of hot fudge and peanuts spilled off the side once the cup hit the table. “I figured you needed it.”
I thanked her, but no. I had everything I needed. As the familiar wave of heat hit my body, I realized that if my only problem was not getting what I want, then I’d be okay.
My gut hurt from laughing so hard. It was our second night. I’d come down to the hotel lounge, cringing that it’d be a somber mood. A fifth-seeded team upset ours and threatened our path to state. But Laurie’s husband was telling an ice fishing story that had us rolling off our chairs.
I was comfortable in the lounge. The coaches stayed away, especially during a time like this. If the team lost tomorrow and the coaches were seen anywhere near the bar, well, I didn’t know if they could get fired, but I’m sure it was more than a bad look. It’d cost them the trust of the parents and the team, not to mention the community. A small one like ours? That kind of thing would get around like a dry-summer grass fire. I was safe from running across Hayden here.
Tappen’s dad started in on the first time his partner had taken him fishing. I’d heard this one before, and my mind wandered back to the previous night.
I need to talk to you. I can get another room, just for talking.
Talking. Hayden wanted to talk to me, in private apparently. While I trusted myself not to strip down just because he reserved a room just for us, I had no interest in being hidden away. I’d thought long and hard. The curiosity about what he wanted to say almost ate away my resolve. Did he want to apologize? Beg me back? Seduce me? Chew me out? For what, I didn’t know, but I tried to consider all the possibilities before I replied.
No. We can talk in the lobby. In public. Where people might actually see us. But I’m not a secret to be kept.
That didn’t mean that I hadn’t asked Conner how Mason was doing, trying to get a sense of why Hayden wanted to meet. He and his ex had issues to work through, and he was busy with the tournament. He shouldn’t have any business with me.
Since I had nowhere to drive, I ordered another beer. I’d nursed the first one for over an hour, but the story was half done and the night was still young. Going back to my quiet room to wonder what Hayden had contacted me about wasn’t an option.
A bewildered look crossed Tappen’s dad’s face and he stopped in the middle of his story. “Coach? Is something wrong?”
I froze. Coach? Which coach? Was everything all right? I looked over my shoulder and there was Hayden, in his gray slacks with his white suit shirt rolled up his forearms. His expression was serious, and his hands were stuffed in his trousers and bulged like they were clenched. He was looking at me.
“Hayden?” Now I was worried.
“I’d like to talk to you, Jess.”
The rest of the table fell quiet. This was going to be hard to explain. I was twisting in my chair to get out, but he withdrew a hand and held it out.
“No, this is fine.” His gaze touched briefly on everyone around the table, but his eyes hardened with resolve. “I talked to Mason. About you. About us. I said that I missed you and I cared about you. I told him that if he wasn’t willing to work through my relationship with someone else and still wanted to go live with his mother, then I’d be disappointed, but I’d support his decision. Because I want to be with you.”
My world stilled. My heart quivered like it didn’t know if it should pound because Hayden just outed us to everyone, or melt because he wanted me back and he was willing to work with his son on it—or not.
Grace’s whispered “Damn” reached me and jerked me into speaking. “But… What… I can’t just take you back after you dumped me.” I had no idea why I said that, but it felt important not to take a leap into his arms. It was one thing to break it off over his son, but another to do it because a hockey game was at stake.
“I don’t deserve you back. But, Jess, I never thought I’d meet anyone that I could see a future with until you walked into Mr. Westfall’s office. The last few months showed me how much I missed being with someone, but the last week has shown me that I miss being with you. And that you were right. Mason, Carrie, and I can still work things out without me giving up the best thing that’s ever happened to me since my son was born.”
The server slipped between us and set my beer on the counter. She looked at me, at Hayden, at the quiet table. “I’ll come back to settle the bill.”
“It’s on me.” Grace handed her a ten.
I was out of my seat and in front of him. “You came into the bar, the night before the deciding game for state, to tell me that you want to get back together?”
“Like I said, you were right. If we’d been honest from the start, Mason wouldn’t have felt so betrayed.”
“That’s on me too. I didn’t want to tell anyone at first.”
“But then you did.” He closed the distance between us. “Going to state is a big deal, but not more important than you. I don’t want a trophy keeping me warm at night. I want you.”
The only people talking in the bar weren’t part of our group. Anyone that was associated with the Snowbirds, or even who knew who Coach Lennox was, was watching us.
“I want to be with you,” I finally admitted. I gave him a little smile. “And I want that trophy too.”
A slow grin spread across his face, and he wrapped his arms around me, tugging me toward him. “I’m getting you both.” Dipping his head, he did what I never thought he’d do, and honestly, I still didn’t know if it was a good idea.
He kissed me in front of everyone. Not a little peck. Nothing chaste. The kiss was him, staking his claim and letting the world know I was his. Twining my arms around his neck, I kissed him back, soaking in his heat and how solid he felt in my arms.
A whoop went out that sounded like Laurie, and I didn’t know who started clapping, but I reluctantly broke away from Hayden.
“You’re also going to owe me a dinner. Conner’s been driving.”
His eyes crinkled, but he kept me tucked into him. “I think we should go tell him what’s going on.”
I nodded, unable to speak past the lump in my throat.
“I’ll find Mason and ask him if he wants to join us.”
I found my voice because we were going to do this right. “That’ll give me a moment alone with Conner.”
He released me, nodded toward my group and left the bar.
I collected my purse, my face flaming hot. “So, um…”
Laurie snorted. “I’d ask questions, but that kiss answered a whole lot. Sit by us tomorrow and tell us everything.” She must’ve seen the alarm in my eyes. “Okay, the abridged version.”
I looked at Grace. What would she think? I didn’t want to give up one relationship for another. Would she think that?
She grinned. “So, carpooling to games may be a no-go?”
“No, we’re on. So is our bridge group.”
I turned and left with Laurie’s question fading behind me. “What bridge group?”
Epilogue
One year lat
er…
“Where do we put this thing?” Hayden held the picture of the Snowbirds holding the state trophy they earned two months ago.
“Right next to the other one.” He’d done what he said. Last year, the team went to state and won big. They did the same this year, and the only big drama was that a late spring storm nearly kept Kyle and Carrie’s flight from landing in time.
We’d lived apart for the last year to keep from upsetting the boys by making them leave their childhood homes. Both kids were graduating at the end of the month. Then Conner was off to the University of Minnesota, and Mason had decided to take six months to stay with Carrie and Kyle. Conner was even going with him for the first month after they got their diplomas.
The boys had never been closer. It took some time. Hayden and I kept it slow, but we were clear about when we were seeing each other. Overnights didn’t happen until last summer when Conner and Mason not only started talking, but joking around with each other.
Kyle was true to his word, and so was I. The father/son relationship was repaired. The same went with Mason and Carrie. I was even astounded at how mature Carrie had been through the whole ordeal. We’d all needed a change.
Yesterday was move-in day. Today, we were unpacking, but it was also the eve of our wedding day. Hayden asked me to marry him on the same night of the sectional tournaments as he’d confessed his love last year. He wanted to make sure I knew that he wasn’t distracted by the trek to state.
He placed the picture off the side of the mantel, saving the middle for our kids’ senior portraits.
“I can’t believe we’re going to be empty-nesters before we’re forty.”
He chuckled. “The more pressing question is…what are you going to do with yourself without hockey?”
“So, um… Grace mentioned starting a women’s league. You know, one that’s just a whoever can show up whenever and we’ll scrimmage.”
Offsides (A Playing Hard Novella Book 3) Page 8
