Now and Again
Page 18
Mike realised his mistake. ‘I didn’t mean it like…’
There was a knock at the front door. They both looked toward it, visible from the kitchen. ‘Better get that,’ she said, putting her mug down on the side. She walked through and opened the door. ‘Amanda?’
Amanda looked hassled. ‘Thank god you’re here. I’ve left Mike, I’m starting on my own, and I need you to come back!’
Juliet struggled to form a response. ‘Errr….’
‘Amanda?’ Mike said, appearing behind Juliet.
Amanda’s eyes went round. ‘Mike? What the hell are you doing here?’
‘I’ve come to get Juliet back,’ he told her.
‘What do you mean, you’re getting her back? I’m getting her back! She can work for me wherever I land up now.’
‘No… I’m getting her back. For us. I’m fixing what I did!’
Amanda, livid, walked right into the house. Juliet simply stood aside.
‘Mike, if you thought this would fix everything, you’re wrong. It was the last thing, that’s all. This - you and me - doesn’t work. You don’t want to be married. We got pregnant, and we tried. But this isn’t for you. You don’t know how to be with someone like that. And I can’t have Mia being around it anymore.’
Mike looked as though he’d been slapped. ‘You’re the best person I’ve ever known.’
Amanda was unimpressed. ‘If that were true, you’d be kinder to me. You’d treat me like I was special. But you don’t do that.’
Juliet felt a bit embarrassed to be watching this. But what was she supposed to do? This was her sister’s house; she couldn’t just leave. Actually, yes, she could. She went to the door, saying, ‘I’m gonna leave you to it. Let yourselves out when you’re done.’
Amanda turned. ‘No, I’m not here to talk to him, I came to talk to you!’
‘Amanda, just hear me out,’ Mike begged his wife.
‘Call me later, you’ve got my number,’ Juliet said. She didn’t address it to anyone, in particular, she wasn’t sure who to say it to. She opened the door.
But lo and behold, standing in front of the door was yet another Powell. ‘Hi,’ said Riley, sounding nervous.
Juliet felt a truckload of emotions dumped onto her at the sight of Riley. She couldn’t deal with it. ‘Why are you here?’ she snapped.
‘Umm, I came to talk to you,’ Riley said, looking flustered.
‘Riley?’ said Amanda and Mike in unison from the room behind her.
‘What the fuck?’ Riley exclaimed as her father and stepmother appeared at the door behind Juliet.
‘Why are you here? Are you trying to hire her for Mia too?’ Mike said, baffled.
Amanda tutted at him. ‘That’s not what this is, Mike.’
‘Then what is it?’ Mike asked.
No one answered him.
Juliet looked behind her and in front of her. ‘I don’t know what’s happening, but I’m leaving. And then I need to have a word with whoever keeps giving this address out. Lock the door behind you, someone.’
‘Hold on, I need to speak to you,’ Riley begged.
‘You can have her after me,’ Mike said. ‘So, will you come back?’
Juliet turned around to Mike. ‘Well—’
‘He doesn’t need you, I do. He’s only gonna look after her at weekends,’ Amanda said. ‘Which will make a bloody change,’ she added bitterly.
Mike sighed.
Riley said, ‘Juliet, can we—’
‘Right!’ Juliet said sharply. ‘We’re not doing this on the doorstep! Riley! Get in the house.’
Riley stepped inside, and Juliet closed the door. She looked at the three of them, all awkward and out of place. ‘Everyone sit!’ Juliet commanded.
Everyone looked around them and perched wherever they could. Mike and Amanda at either end of the sofa. Riley in an armchair.
Juliet was surprised at how quickly they’d all done as they were told. She supposed kids never grew up, forever responding to the person in the room who took charge. But now she had everyone sat and quiet, she didn’t know what to do with them. ‘Would everyone like a cup of tea?’
‘I’ve still got one in the kitchen,’ Mike reminded her.
‘I’ll bring it through,’ Juliet told him. ‘Well? Riley? Amanda?’
‘Sure,’ said Riley. ‘OK, thanks,’ said Amanda.
Juliet went into the kitchen and got a tray of tea assembled, including one for herself. Extra sugar. She needed it. She took the tray in and put it down on the coffee table. Everyone took a mismatched mug.
Juliet blew on her tea and took a sip. ‘Right, so I guess… Look, Mike? Amanda? Clearly, there needs to be a conversation between the two of you before you can hire Mia a nanny. But whatever happens… I don’t think I can come back. I love Mia, and I miss her. But the situation has changed. I’m not a private nanny anymore.’
Mike and Amanda swapped a look and then turned back to Juliet. ‘What?’ Amanda said. ‘Why would you stop? You’re fantastic at it.’
‘I broke her,’ Mike moaned. ‘This is what I do.’
Riley looked at her father in mild horror. ‘What the hell’s happened to you?’
‘Amanda left him,’ Juliet informed her quietly.
Riley looked at Amanda. She nodded. ‘Shit,’ Riley exclaimed.
Mike began to cry. No one in the room responded for a moment, too shocked. Riley eventually said, ‘Jesus, Dad.’
‘What?’ he asked, snot bubbling.
‘You didn’t cry when gran died.’
Mike wiped his nose across the back of his very expensive sleeve. The room shuddered. It was then Juliet understood how truly at sea he was. The Mike she knew wouldn’t have done any of this. But the sleeve? He was in pure crisis.
‘Mike, are you alright?’ Amanda asked him tenderly, despite herself.
Mike, still crying heavily, said, ‘No! I’m losing it! Or I’ve already lost it. Both my daughters, my wife. I’ve lost everything.’
Riley, though she looked uncomfortable, said, ‘You haven’t lost your daughters. Not yet. But you have to do better.’
Mike managed to stop blubbing. ‘I haven’t?’
‘I mean, don’t get me wrong, you’ve been a real dick.’
‘Yeah,’ Amanda agreed.
Mike looked hopefully at his wife and daughter. He nodded. ‘I know. I have. But, I’ll… I’ll go into therapy. Today. I’ll get myself… I’ll sort it.’
Amanda started coughing. ‘You’re going to therapy?! You!’
‘Do you think there’s no point?’ Mike asked his wife.
Amanda didn’t answer. Neither did Riley. For some reason, Mike turned to Juliet. ‘Is there no point?’ he asked her.
Juliet looked at the room and then back to Mike. ‘It’s not for me to say.’
Mike began to cry fresh tears. Juliet, despite how much she resented what was happening, knew what she had to do. She went to Mike and put a hand on his shoulder, deciding for him, if that’s what she had to do. ‘I think if you want to change, you will.’
Riley nodded slowly. ‘Maybe she’s right. If you want it, maybe you can. Maybe change can happen.’
Everyone looked at Amanda to see what she thought. She nodded. ‘Yeah. You have to want it. But I think it’s possible.’ Mike dried his eyes, new hope in them. Amanda added quickly. ‘That doesn’t mean anything for you and me, necessarily. But maybe we could talk. In a few months.’
Mike nodded like an energetic puppy. ‘That’s great, that’s… that’s all I need. Just to know there’s a chance.’
‘I’m not promising anything,’ Amanda said sternly.
‘I understand,’ Mike said.
Amanda looked from her husband, from Riley to Juliet, took a sip of tea, and put the cup on the table. ‘Right, we need to leave, Mike.’
Mike, wiping up his soggy face, said, ‘What?’
Amanda was on her feet, getting Mike on his, shoving him toward the door. ‘I haven’t finished my t
ea…’ he said as he was bundled out of the house. The door closed and then opened. Amanda’s face reappeared. ‘Thanks, Juliet. I haven’t given up on getting you back, just so you know. I don’t think anyone in this family has.’ The door closed again.
Juliet frowned at the closed door, confused. She looked back to Riley, the last of the Powell clan left. ‘What did that mean?’
Riley was struggling to look at Juliet. ‘It means Amanda’s a nosy mare, that’s what it means. She’s also right,’ she added. ‘I fucked up. I don’t know if it’s too late for me either. Maybe a decade too late. But I came to explain some things. In the hopes… Well, I’ll explain, and then you can decide.’
Juliet gripped her tea. ‘OK,’ she said, feeling nervous for reasons she couldn’t understand.
‘You were right about India. She did it. She pushed you in that pool on purpose.’
Juliet didn’t quite know how to react to that, but she was not exactly ready to forgive or forget. ‘I’m well aware of that. I didn’t need you to confirm it.’
Riley sighed. ‘You’re still angry.’
‘No shit.’
‘Is it weird that I find that encouraging?’ Riley asked.
‘Encouraging how?’ Juliet snapped.
‘I probably shouldn’t have said that,’ Riley said with a nervous chuckle. ‘I’m just kind of… I’m having to retcon some of my life, and it’s putting me in a real spin.’ She shrugged. ‘But you don’t… You don’t care about that, do you?’
‘Care about what, Riley? You haven’t told me anything… except what I already knew. But if this is an apology, just…’ Juliet slumped down in her chair. ‘You know what, I don’t need any more apologies. Just get on with your life and consider me dealt with.’
‘No, no, I don’t…’ Riley stood up. ‘I don’t want to consider you dealt with. I’ve had this…’ Riley took a gulpy breath and looked at the floor for a moment. Then she gave Juliet a very hard, focused look that caused several goose bumps to pop on her arms. It pissed her off, but she couldn’t fight her own body.
Riley started talking again, in a great, panicked rush. ‘Shit, I’m just gonna go for it. I’ve had this mad crush on you since I was eighteen. I don’t think I ever got over it.’
Juliet felt several things at that moment. Some of which were entirely antithetical. Excitement and anger. Rage and joy. Hope and despair. She didn’t know what was going to win until she stood and said, ‘Don’t you dare!’
Riley looked slightly frightened. ‘What?’
‘Do not come into my home, well, my sister’s home but kind of mine for the moment, and plonk this load of crap on me! Because I’ve been chasing you for months, despite the bloody horrid way you treated me when we were young—’
Riley stood excitably. ‘No, wait! That’s the other thing! You’ve got that wrong! We both did.’
It was a good start to a story that lasted several minutes and included several apologies. Juliet was flabbergasted, not just by Riley’s admissions of guilt, but by how much of it relied on Juliet’s shortcomings. Riley had made mistakes, but so had she. They’d both been lied to, but both had been all too ready to believe the lies.
Juliet understood, at last, that they were both, well, total fucking idiots.
‘So, you never told India anything I told you?’
‘God, no,’ Riley said. ‘And you thought I saw your, erm, chest? That I was laughing at you?’
‘Yep.’
‘Well, I didn’t,’ Riley assured her.
‘I know. No one saw it, I found that out later, but then India…’ She trailed off. No point going back over it.
Juliet didn’t know what to do. So she sat back down and sipped her tea. ‘Fuck,’ she muttered into the mug. ‘That’s… What… How… What do we… I mean, what does this…’
‘Do you think I’m just like India?’ Riley asked suddenly.
‘What?’
‘Because that’s been making me sad for a decade now. Not completely because of you, but somewhat. I just need to ask you if you think I’m just some spoiled, boring daddy’s girl. That’s the most real thing I know how to ask right now, and it’s horrible to actually say the words…’
Juliet put her tea down, open-mouthed. ‘Riley? Are you… Have you fallen on your head? You’re the most…’ Juliet paused and thought and understood what this meant and why it was being asked. She couldn’t bear Riley to go on under this misconception for a second longer. ‘I know why you’re asking that. Because I’ve said some things to you in anger because I was hurt back then. And now. But…’ Juliet put her hand on her heart while she caught her breath. ‘You’re it to me. You always have been. Nothing about you ever bored me for a single second.’
Riley’s expression went quite beyond relief.
Juliet put her tea down, stood, and went to Riley. She knelt in front of her and softly took her hand. ‘You’re Riley Powell. You’re not like anyone else. Not anyone.’
Riley squeezed her hand and pulled her in, and it was happening. Lips, hands, warm, fervent, everywhere. Nobody knocked on the door, or walked into the room to interrupt, or pushed anyone in a pool. So it kept happening. And happening. And happening.
Ten whole years they’d waited for this, and it was worth it.
Twenty-Eight
TWO MONTHS LATER
‘Mia! Mia! Slow down!’ Riley said as her sister fled across the lawn on her ride-on Porsche. The thing was going quicker than it had a right to. Mia was headed for a rosebush at the end of the garden. It was Amanda’s favourite. ‘Mia, put the brakes on!’ Riley screamed. But Mia wasn’t listening. The plant was done for.
But the car screeched right into a pair of legs at the end of the garden. ‘That’s your mother’s favourite plant!’ Mike said to his youngest daughter with fondness. ‘Do I have to take that car away before you destroy the whole garden?’
Mia looked up in horror. ‘No, Daddy! Don’t take my car!’
‘Then listen to your sister when she tells you to stop,’ Mike said, bending over and switching off the car.
Riley had caught up with the car by now. ‘Dad, is this your day? I thought you had her tomorrow?’
‘Not officially, but Amanda said I could have an hour with her,’ he stated, picking Mia gently out of the vehicle, balancing her on his hip. She put her arms around him and leaned in, quite drained from the big getaway. ‘Is Amanda here?’ Mike asked, cuddling his youngest daughter.
‘No, that’s why I’m here. She got called into the office an hour ago, so she gave me a shout.’
‘On a Saturday? They’re taking advantage of her good nature. But anyway, she could have called me; I’d have been straight over.’
‘Aren’t you working?’ Riley asked.
‘It’s a Saturday,’ Mike said. Riley was tempted to mock him for suddenly deciding weekends were a thing, but decided to let it go. She was trying to do that a lot lately. If he wanted to change, she had to let him.
It took some getting used to, how much her dad had turned around in the last few months. Before, he was never here, even when he was. Now that he didn’t live here, you couldn’t keep him away. Amanda hadn’t taken him back yet. She didn’t think he was ready. She told Riley that she wanted to see if the changes would, ‘Really set in.’
Riley supposed it was a bit strange being such buddies with her stepmother, but they were too close in age to be anything else. So Riley ended up hearing quite a bit about her father’s second marriage and she agreed that if they ever got back together, it needed to be taken slowly. Her dad had to know he couldn’t go back to his old, cold, closed-off self. But when Mike Powell took on a task, he put himself into it completely. For a change, it had worked in his favour. He was trying, everyone could see.
It did Riley’s heart good to see it. To see that growing up, growing better, was possible. If even Mike didn’t have to be Mike, then Riley was free to be whoever the hell she wanted to be too. She didn’t have to be stuck in old ideas.
Riley had a look. ‘Yeah, Dad. I think it’s very Amanda.’