Season of Hytalia

by Jennifer Arntson

  She stepped back into line, her hands folded at her waist, as the others did to her right and left.

  “You hosted a lovely party the other night,” I complimented them, unsure what to do with my soiled napkin. Still, they stared at my feet and said nothing.

  I looked down at my toes nervously. What were they looking at? My feet were clean. I stepped to the side assuming I stood somewhere I shouldn’t be, yet their eyes stayed fixed at the floor beneath me. I checked my feet again. Nothing.

  “What’s the matter?” I asked, but they didn’t respond.

  The situation dissolved from awkward to downright uncomfortable. They felt it as much as I did, I’m sure.

  Am I still a Scavenger to be ignored?

  How could I forget my status so quickly? I set the napkin on the table and apologized. My shoulders fell and squeezed together in delayed effort to minimize my stature.

  They are Citizens, and I am a Reclaimer.

  I had no right to address them; of course they would ignore me. They didn’t hide a mess, they stood to protect the perishables.

  I retreated, making sure to apologize loud enough for them to hear even though my breath had abandoned me. They stared at the floor, as I did.

  Evidently, my short time at the Resistance changed me. When did I become so comfortable talking with people I didn’t know? Their silence proved I was no more welcome among them than before the slide. Would they have me hanged for addressing a Citizen?

  Would they hang Calish, too?

  My gods, what have I done?

  Father warned me to stay clear of the valley unless claiming. Over the last season, I’d traveled recklessly and ignored the years of training my parents gave. The Resistance worked within the walls of their community, nowhere else.

  Foolish, foolish child!

  I could outrun the servants if I tried. Their ridiculous shoes would handicap any effort to chase after me. What about the guards, though? Would I make it through the gate? Probably not. Fighting back tears, I clutched the oversized band resting in my pocket, regretting my decision to come downstairs alone.

  A familiar hand on the small of my back startled me. “Why did you leave?” Calish yawned.

  Grateful to be rescued, I pulled the ring from my pocket, still hanging on the chain. “I wanted to return this.”

  He smiled and kissed my temple. “Of course you did,” he said taking it from me. “I believe this is yours, Qarla. Thank you for lending it to me. It played a special role.”

  The woman shook her head. “It’s the Lady’s now, my Lord.”

  She hadn’t acknowledged me at all, yet now she calls me a Lady?

  “It’s my pleasure and honor to give it to you both. I swear, my Lord, I would never ask it to be returned.”

  “The thought never occurred to me.” Calish took her hand, placing it in her palm before closing her fingers around it. “I suppose this is as good a time as any to introduce you to my wife, Una. Una, this is the house staff.”

  The two women and man bowed in reply.

  I bowed back relieved to be recognized in such a way that didn’t suggest I’d be executed shortly thereafter. Calish straightened be up, leaving his arm around my back while resting his hand on my shoulder. His expression didn’t feel loving, but rigid as if keeping me still.

  Am I not supposed to bow?

  Uneasy with his masked restraint, I shifted away from his hold. Calish glanced at me with warning as if I’d already overstepped my allowance. I rejected his effort and turned my attention to the middle-aged servant. “I put it on the necklace so you might still wear it without drawing any unwanted attention.”

  The three of them glanced at each other. “As you wish, my Lord,” she nodded.

  My Lord? I brought the ring back to her, not him. I added the necklace to keep her ownership of the band discreet. Why acknowledge Calish for my actions?

  “Have I done something wrong?” I asked softly.

  “You’ll have to excuse my wife, she’s new to all of this.” He rubbed my back and explained, “It’s disrespectful to me if they talk to you directly.”

  “Well that’s ridiculous,” I quipped, stepping away from his reach. “We all live under the same roof, yet we’re not allowed to speak to each other?”

  Calish laughed taking my hand instead, obviously amused by my confusion. “Una, first of all, they don’t live here. Second, you can address them whenever you please. It’s improper for them to address the Lady of the House.”

  “Wait, you three don’t live here?”

  “Here we go,” Calish dropped my hand. The staff remained silent.

  Already forgetting the social rules, I asked the servants, “Where do you live?”

  My husband, the Lord of the estate, answered on their behalf. “Elsewhere. They live outside the gates.”

  “In the shacks leaning against each other in the mud?” I clarified.

  “They live in town, yes.”

  “Is that what you call it? My gods, Calish, have you seen what’s out there? Why aren’t they staying here in this house?” When he didn’t answer quickly enough, I repeated the question to the servants. “Why don’t you stay here?”

  The man spoke, “There’s not enough room for all of us here, sir.”

  “Not enough...? That’s insane! This house is large enough for ten families!” I threw my arms out wide. “And for the sake of the gods, answer me, not him.”

  Calish took my arm firmly and less discreetly than his attempt to guide me in the moments before. “You’ve given Qarla back her ring. Now we’re done.”

  I yanked my arm from his grip and glared at him. “Please remember, sir, I am your wife,” I said clenching my teeth together in a forced smile. While we had enjoyed our uninterrupted time together, neither of us had ever had the privilege of laying around for days. Evidently our restlessness presented itself all at once.

  I refused to move until I felt like doing so. We began to quarrel, and it quickly progressed to a full-fledged dispute. Since we had an audience, we tried to argue as politely, but the attempt to didn’t last. Calish continued in a hushed, but abrasive tone, and mine grew increasingly loud and sharp. My palms moistened as my fingernails dug into my own palms. The muscles in my legs pulsed as if ready to lunge at him to end the discussion with violence. I felt the wolf spirit stir like a caged beast and I fought myself more than I fought Calish. I warned him to shut up, but I doubt he heard me. By that point, we had stopped listening. Our argument ran over the others noise until my husband gave up on winning. He couldn’t drag me away from the kitchen against my will. He tried. I wouldn’t let him.

  He wouldn’t fight me with anything other than words. Wimp.

  When my appeals to open our home for the staff failed, I dug at him personally. Marsh would have been proud. I taunted him. I don’t know why. Something about it felt good. Perhaps it was because I could see Calish’s face turn from anger to embarrassed.

  Yes. You don’t like that do you?

  You will lose this fight, My Lord.

  I poked his chest, and he stepped back. He ordered me to shut up, and when I wouldn’t he did something I never expected from him. With furry pouring from his pores, he tossed me over his shoulder to carry me away from his staff. My tongue instinctively felt the pointed tips of my canine teeth, and I looked for a place to sink them in his flesh. I clenched my eyes shut to control the urge.

  What’s happening to me?

  I buried the wolf deep inside my soul to reclaim my wits as my husband carried me away. Sobering quickly, I yelled at the servants. “I give you permission to speak to me whenever you wish!”

  I kicked and squirmed, but his hold held strong. As soon as we were out of their sight, he dropped me on my feet. He grabbed hold of my face and spoke so closely, I felt the heat from his breath on my skin. “Stop it!” he seethed.

  I snatched my chin away from him and took a more reasonable tone. “It’s not right, Calish. Those people in there have
a higher birthright than I do.”

  “Not anymore,” he pushed me up the stairs.

  Every time I tried to speak he roared, “Silence!” Pressing my lips together I stomped down the ridiculously long hallway toward our room. His room. If I slowed, he nudged me forward. I’d never seen him so angry. I’ll admit, I didn’t understand Citizen life, but I most certainly didn’t understand whatever this was.

  Once inside the master suite, I asked, “How can you, of all people, be accepting of any of this?”

  Calish glanced down the hall before closing the door behind us. Still smoldering, but at a controlled volume he said, “I’m not, Una. What you have to understand is that this is what they understand, and they find acceptable. Everyone out there, like Reinick and Noran, hold to the standard of class. This is their world, Una. They make the rules. We can’t go around just breaking them!”

  “Why not?”

  “Because if we do, we’ll be labeled as anarchists and cast out, or worse. You saw what they did to Hawk and his wife! If we start making waves and end up dead, what good is that?”

  How could Calish have so much power, and yet do nothing? With so many homeless, starving and orphaned people out there, why couldn’t he at least help the ones that worked in his house? “I know you took Reinick’s offer to protect me and the baby—”

  “And that’s what I’m doing!” Calish shouted. “But if you are not going to act appropriately, it won’t matter what I do, Una. There are rules for Citizens, just like there are rules for Scavengers. It doesn’t matter that you don’t know them, you will be expected to follow them. If you don’t, there will be unimaginable consequences. You can’t be rebellious and be married to the Junior Lord. You cannot behave the way you did with the servants. You cannot challenge me in their presence! And I swear, if you ever insult me like you did, I’ll—” He turned his back to me and paused.

  You’ll what?

  He ran his hand through his hair before resting his hands on his hips. When he regained control of himself he turned. His face full of regret, admitted defeat. “The only way I can truly protect you, is here in this neighborhood, guarded by the Authority. I don’t care how much you hate them. We need them.”

  He was so wrong, but I knew no way to convince him otherwise. We could leave; go to the Resistance or just disappear into the masses and become a refugee like everyone else. We’d survive. I knew we would. Even still, I couldn’t help but hope that Calish’s position would end up benefiting more than me and our unborn child.

  With his rant over, he straightened the blankets at the foot of the bed and sat, obviously troubled by his own thoughts.

  “We’re not the ones who need protecting, Calish. Not anymore. Who’s going to protect the people out there?”

  “I’m trying.” I heard the exhaustion in his reply. He reached out for me, and I came to him. “It’ll be easier to focus on their needs, now that I’ve accomplished my first task,” he slid his fingers across my arm where it showed evidence of his earlier grip.

  “Your first task?”

  “Keeping Blue from you,” he laid his palms upon my abdomen. “I’ll admit, it worked out better than I expected.”

  “Calish; what am I supposed to do here all day?” I asked. “We have one more day together, then you’ll be off working, and I’ll be left here with the servants. They can’t even talk to me. What am I supposed to do here?”

  “I’m sure you’ll have your hands full soon enough,” his thumbs caressed my belly. “I know it’s a big change, but you’ll get better at it. It took me awhile, too. Most days I feel like an imposter, someone who doesn’t belong here, but then I think about why I’m here.”

  He knew I wasn’t satisfied with his answer. He shook his head and sighed. “Fine, I’ll have a talk with the servants.”

  “Do you think they’ll talk to me like a real person?”

  “I’m sure this won’t be the first time they’ve been asked to do unlawful things. This is the Authority, after all.”

  Perhaps a woman’s role was to be a supportive wife. It’s not as if I’d been handed anything; ours was not an arranged marriage set up for a privileged Citizen girl with a celebrated crimson sash. I had scars and nightmares reminding us of our journey. No one would consider ours an easy path. My parents had spent years cultivating an arrangement to keep me from being sold at womanhood. Their plan took years of preparation, patience, and hope. Although their efforts failed, the results were a blessing beyond expectation.

  I studied the wolf’s bite marks on my hand as I stood lost in the bedroom that would become my new prison. If I knew the requirements leading to that very moment, would I have made the same choices? It’s hard to say. Maybe I’d suffered enough, and the gods would leave me alone.

  “Can we go back to sleep now?” he disrobed, and I succumbed to his invitation.

  I tucked myself under his arm, resting my head on his shoulder, with my hand casually on his chest. He made no attempt to seduce me. We didn’t even share a kiss. His words of the argument hurt, as I’m sure mine still did for him. Our pain remained as naked as we were, and the guilt coupled with indignant resolve prevented us from sharing love. I didn’t regret what I thought. I regretted saying it. How could we spew such cruel things at the one we love the most?

  Shut up.

  You weak and withered coward.

  Know your place.

  You’re pathetic.

  Damn you.

  I wiped the tear escaping the corner of my eye, but another fell quickly after onto Calish’s chest.

  He rolled onto his side toward me and brushed the hair from my forehead. His chin tight with emotion to fight back the pools forming in his eyes. “I’m so sorry I hurt you.”

  I scooted into his embrace and stopped fighting my tears. “I’m sorry I said all those awful things.”

  His arms squeezed around me and suddenly, I understood love and fear in a new way. On that first day of Toridia, I vowed to never push my husband to his limits, but to be the respite he deserved. We each had enough enemies. I would not be among them.

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  Coming Soon

  Start Reading

  Chapter 1 Chapter 2

  Chapter 3 Chapter 4

  Chapter 5 Chapter 6

  Chapter 7 Chapter 8

  Chapter 9 Chapter 10

  Chapter 11 Chapter 12

  Chapter 13 Chapter 14

  Chapter 15 Chapter 16

  Chapter 17 Chapter 18

  Chapter 19 Chapter 20

  Chapter 21 Chapter 22

  Chapter 23 Chapter 24

  Chapter 25 Chapter 26

  Chapter 27 Chapter 28

  Chapter 29 Chapter 30

  Chapter 31 Chapter 32

  Chapter 33

  Dedication

  Season of Toridia Sneak Peek