Regrets & Revenge (Foster Family Book 2)

by Zavi James

  I flinched at the words. Luc had made his intentions crystal clear. Anyone who found Mia had explicit orders to bring her back to him and he would take the kill shot. There had never been an order Luc had given that made me reconsider my position in the family until that moment. I shouldn’t have worried though, since I was under strict instructions to keep clear of any business that concerned her. Luc didn’t trust me, and he had every right not to.

  I’d never be able to walk Mia to her sentence and watch as someone pulled the trigger. Just the thought of it made me nauseous. Mia hadn’t left out of malice; the Feds hadn’t knocked down the doors with search warrants in hand. She had every weapon in her arsenal to complicate our lives, to potentially bring us down. I wouldn’t blame her after what she’d experienced, and yet we continued to operate as if nothing had happened. Mia wasn’t Nero watching an empire burn. She had been spooked by the murder of her father, something I had tried to get Luc to understand, but he was so blinded by his rage that reason and logic were ignored.

  What worried me was the fact that no one had seen her or heard from her. We all knew she didn’t have the funds to start a brand-new life somewhere we couldn’t get to her. So, where the hell had she gone? With those thoughts in mind, I distractedly told Dom, “He doesn’t mean it. He’d never hurt her.”

  Dom let out a bitter laugh, a sound that brought me back to the present. He spun around again, leaning back against the counter. “Dante, I know he’s your brother and you love him, but I wouldn’t put anything past him anymore. He killed Emanuel and Cecilia because they let her go.”

  The two members of Luc’s staff who had been the last people in the family to speak to Mia, to allow her to leave, had been the first to face his wrath. In Luc’s eyes they had made an unforgivable mistake. I wasn’t sure he’d even thought before he pulled the trigger.

  “You saw what he did to me because he thought I knew where she was,” Dom continued.

  I’d walked into the house the day Luc had turned his attention on Dom. All of us thought that Dom might have an idea where Mia went. They had been thick as thieves, whispering and giggling over jokes only they would understand, but seeing the way his mood had fallen confirmed that Dom was as in the dark as the rest of us. At least, to everyone but Luc. He believed he’d be able to beat the truth out of Dom. I was surprised when Dom returned to work, bruised and broken, but loyalty to the family ran deep.

  “He fired Lydia and he shot you,” he completed to the list.

  “Shot at me,” I corrected him.

  Dom ignored me, not interested in the technicalities of the matter. “Luc doesn’t care anymore, Dante. The greatest gift you can give Mia is peace. Wherever she is, whatever she’s doing, pray she stays hidden, because Luc’s not joking when he says he’s going to kill her.”

  My prayers couldn’t have been more different. I didn’t ask God for much. Religion had been a requirement of my mother’s and it maintained a place in my life now thanks to my other family. Still, I hoped He listened when I asked for help to find Mia. People would probably have an easier time believing if He just answered a few more prayers here and there, gave us a miracle or two.

  The front door slammed shut, causing us both to jump. “I’m not asking you to do anything more than keep an eye out for her. If you see or hear anything, let me know.” Luc came into the kitchen, talking down the phone. “I’m asking you as a friend… Fine! Forget it!”

  “Anything I can help with, boss?” I asked as he threw the phone onto the island. It skittered across the worktop and stopped, balancing precariously at the edge.

  “People are starting to show their true colors,” Luc said, staring at the phone, and I wasn’t entirely sure if he was talking to me. “Loyalty means nothing these days.”

  “Boss?” I tried again.

  Luc’s eyes snapped up to me. Looking at him now was like being transported back five years ago. His eyes were dead and empty, much in the way they had been when Charlie died. The only difference between Luc then and now was that back then, he had withdrawn from the family, and now, he was full steam ahead to prove a point. And Xavier’s crooked hand was guiding him in an integral decision. “Don’t you have a home to go to?” he asked, eyes narrowed.

  From the corner of my eye, I caught Dom leaving the room. Ever since Luc had fired Lydia, after she’d told him without fear exactly what she thought of his behavior, Dom floated around the house like a spirit trying not to wake the beast. I didn’t blame him after the state Luc had left him in following his interrogation.

  “I thought this would always be my home,” I said. Those were the words Charlie had once told me and after he had died, Luc repeated them. He wanted me to know that my ties with the Foster family didn’t end just because Charlie was no longer here, but there had never been any doubt in my mind. “Who were you on the phone to?”

  Luc crossed the room and pulled a bottle of water out of the fridge. For a moment, I thought he wouldn’t answer my question. It wasn’t unusual for him to ignore me, only answering when his mood teetered on the edge rather than swung into full blown psychotic. There was a beat of silence before he said, “Emilio Diaz.”

  I tensed at the name, hoping he didn’t notice. “What did you need Emilio for?”

  Everything I did these days was scrutinised by Luc. Every movement, every breath raised a suspicion in him. He closed the fridge, surveying me as he uncapped the bottle of water and took a drink. “I wanted to see if he could lend a hand in helping to find her,” he responded coldly.

  “I take it he said no.” The way my heart hammered in my chest made me think I should book myself in for a medical. That it might burst out and mimic the way Luc’s phone had hopped across the worktop before unveiling all my secrets.

  A muscle near Luc’s jaw jumped as he clenched his teeth. “No,” he snarled. “Apparently, Emilio has enough on his plate at the moment.”

  “Understandable,” I answered, maybe a little too quickly, but Luc didn’t say anything about it. “He and Carmen have a newborn,” I reminded him. The golden Diaz couple had welcomed their newest addition, Javier, three months ago.

  Obviously, I had said the wrong thing. Luc took no joy in the news of the birth, in the fact that life went on even when all of ours, and particularly Luc’s, had stuttered and stalled in unimaginable ways. To him, it was unfair that joy still existed when he had been robbed of his. “I’m not in the mood for company,” Luc told me, pushing away from the counter and making a move toward the door.

  Our relationship had deteriorated so severely that I felt like a leper rather than his brother. I had always believed there was an unbreakable bond between us, cemented after we lost Isa and Charlie, two events that should have torn us apart, but made us grow stronger. Now, I worked with a stranger. I no longer recognised Luc as the man I’d been raised alongside in blood and honor. “No,” I said, following him out of the room. “Not unless it’s Xavier’s.”

  There were times when I couldn’t hold my tongue. Usually, the offhand comments weren’t worth the response, but Luc turned on his heel. “What is your problem?”

  The past few months had seen me work overtime cleaning up the aftermath of what I had termed affectionately as Hurricane Luc. Every decision made in anger meant a rapid cover up, and although I would do it without question, it was becoming tiring and I missed the days my boss, my brother, let the sliver of humanity he possessed guide his actions.

  “I never had you down as a puppet, Luc.” It was a low blow. It hadn’t gone unnoticed that Xavier had taken an uncomfortable shine to Luc. He’d hovered after Mia left, but Luc’s grief at the unexpected loss saw him turn everyone away. It was only when it had transformed fully into rage and Luc began to settle back into the family business that Xavier lurked again, dripping poison into his ear.

  There was a beat of silence before Luc spoke. His words were low and dangerous. “Do you want to say that again?”

  May as well go all in. The worst he coul
d do was kill me and death was an inevitability, so that fate had never scared me. “I’m all for following the family hierarchy but it’s gone a little too far now, don’t you think?” Luc had become so desperate to right his reputation that he had taken Xavier’s word on this matter as gospel, the ridiculous notion of putting a hit out for Mia. Luc would never have come up with something like that on his own. “I didn’t expect you to become a lapdog who fell into line because Xavier clapped his hands. Charlie would be mortified to see how you’re dealing with this.”

  A step too far. I’d taken it a step too far. Charlie had been our idol and raised us to be part of the family business. Luc had always wanted to take the best of his Dad and cultivate it in his own personality, but I could never imagine Charlie behaving the way Luc had lately. He may have been Xavier’s closest confidant, but Charlie was still his own man, conducting his own business with his own morals. Nothing could have swayed him from his beliefs.

  “Get out.” Luc grasped the bottle tight and water threatened to slosh out over the lip.

  “Luc…”

  “GET OUT!” The veins at his temple and neck protruded from anger and turned him red in the face. I didn’t risk another word before I slipped past him, lucky to have gotten away with nothing more than a verbal response. Just as I opened the front door, I heard a crash and the splatter of water as Luc took his anger on yet another inanimate object. Slamming the door shut behind me, I stumbled down the stairs hastily and slid into my car. Dragging in deep breaths, I rested my head against the steering wheel.

  A vibration from my pocket caused me to raise my head and fish out my phone out. Emilio’s name was displayed across the screen and I swiped to answer the call. “Emilio?”

  “Can you talk?” he asked, not bothering with the usual pleasantries.

  “Yes.”

  “Is Luc with you?”

  “No,” I said, looking at the house in front of me where Luc was likely to be destroying anything in sight. “No, I’m good. We can talk.” The adrenaline flooded my body and I felt lightheaded with anticipation. I had been waiting impatiently for the last week to hear back from Emilio. A mixture of excitement and fear rolled in my stomach until I leaned back in my seat and closed my eyes, calming myself as I waited for him to break the silence. When he did, he said the words I had prayed for.

  “I’ve found Mia.”

  Chapter Three

  Mia

  Tap.

  Tap. Tap.

  Tap.

  The sharp, short pattern of knocking caused me to lift my head. Out of habit, my body stilled, and I quietened my breathing, waiting a moment to see if there would be anymore.

  Tap. Tap.

  Tap.

  That was the confirmation I needed. Placing the book face down on the sofa, spine earning yet another crease, I stood up to answer the door. Carmen had a specific knock that I adhered to and everything else went unanswered.

  “Sorry, Mia,” Carmen said, as I opened the door. She stood at the threshold of my tiny apartment with a pram in front of her and Santiago hanging onto her hand. He was the best dressed three-year-old I knew. Just behind her was the looming figure of Giovanni, who I had learned followed Carmen around like a silent and lethal shadow. “Apparently, neither of my boys could do without me today.”

  “Don’t apologize.” I brushed her off, moving aside so she could make her way into the apartment. Santi immediately let go of his mother’s hand and ran at me, grin plastered on his face. Someday, Santiago Diaz would be a complete heartbreaker with that bright smile and blue eyes. He’d inherited everything from his mother. “Santiago! Careful!” Carmen scolded him.

  Laughing and with a slight wobble, I crouched down, hugging him close and placed a kiss his cheek. “Hello, Santi.”

  He suddenly became shy and retreated. Carmen removed Javier from the pram carefully. The smallest Diaz was wide awake and looking around the room before letting out a yawn that made my heart tug.

  “How are you feeling?” she asked, taking a seat on the couch and narrowly avoiding the book, which I pulled out of the way last minute.

  “I’m fine. Tired but okay,” I responded. “You can take a seat if you want, Gio.” The mass of muscle gave me an uncomfortable look before shaking his head, taking up his customary position against the wall in a laughable attempt to blend into the background.

  “Suit yourself,” I mumbled before sitting beside Carmen and tossing the book onto the coffee table. Santi had joined Gio and I turned my attention back to the baby in my friend’s arms. “He’s grown so much.” Javier wasn’t as tiny as the initial pictures Carmen had sent me, slowly losing the newborn features that made him indistinguishable from every other baby and taking on subtle Diaz characteristics.

  “Mmm,” she hummed, gazing adoringly at her baby son. It was a look that held so much love that it made me ache for my own mother, a yearning that seldom occurred when I hardly had any memories of her. “You have to enjoy every minute with them. They grow up in the blink of an eye.” Carmen looked up at me and asked, “Would you like to hold him?”

  I raised my hands up in front of me as panic flooded my system and shook my head. “He looks content with you.”

  Carmen looked as if she wanted to say something but held back and I was grateful. This had been her first visit in months. She’d understandably had her plate full with the new arrival and family visiting. Her replacement had been her stoic bodyguard who appeared with the necessities or to accompany me to appointments before leaving without a word. I tried not to take it personally. Gio only had a soft spot for Carmen and even that would go unnoticed by an untrained eye.

  “Mia,” Carmen said after a few moments of silence that was broken by Santi asking Gio questions. I knew what was coming. We’d had several iterations of this conversations over the course of the year. “Are you sure this is what you want?”

  There had been many times that Carmen’s lilting accent and soft-spoken words had almost lulled me into changing my mind. On the days where it all seemed too much, when I felt that life had tested me to my breaking point, I wanted to give in and walk back into the family fold. I longed for someone to make the decisions for me, because every time I settled on a path it felt wrong. But it was impossible. When Carmen had arrived with the news that Luc had put out a search for me with a hefty bounty on my life, I knew there would never be a way of returning to what I had turned my back on.

  Numbly, I nodded my head at my friend, even though my heart weighed heavy with regrets. “It’s the only way,” I told her.

  “You know that isn’t true.” Carmen placed a hand over mine and I swallowed hard to rid myself of the lump in my throat. Her ring finger bore an impressive set of rings, engagement and wedding band, and my own finger felt bare. “Emil and I can speak to him. He’ll see sense, Mia.”

  “You know it’s not just Luc.”

  “If you told me the full story then it would be easier for me to help.”

  I pulled my hand away and shook my head. Carmen had spent a lot time at the beginning trying to coax from me why I’d left Luc, but I couldn’t tell her the truth. I had seen first-hand what Xavier was capable of, and I refused to put Carmen and her family in danger. She had already gone above and beyond for me. The topic had been dropped when I’d mentioned that the truth would risk her family. We may have been friends, but I fell beneath her family in the list of priorities.

  “Okay,” she said quietly. “Gio, hand me my bag.” Gio peeled himself away from the wall and handed Carmen the designer bag that matched her outfit perfectly. She dipped a hand inside before presenting me with a manilla envelope. I took it from her, dragging my index finger under the seal and peering inside.

  “Carmen,” I breathed, seeing a tidy bundle of notes inside. “I told you I only needed—”

  “I know what you told me, Mia,” she cut me off. “But you can’t start fresh on nothing but a hope and a dream. I’m not sending you out there with nothing. This is the last t
hing I can give you, so please.”

  Tears burned my eyes and I blinked rapidly to stop them from falling. “Thank you.” I reached into the envelope, hand sliding past the money to pull out the other items I had requested from Carmen. The passport felt heavy in my hand, filled with the possibilities of a new life. Flipping open the pages, I stopped when I came across a picture of my face staring back at me. This was taken months ago. My face was gaunt and hair shorter than it was now, the Mia of a past life. The details next to the image were completely fake. The name Mia Griffin would no longer belong to me and it would be easier for me to hide.

  Carmen had assured me that none of this would be difficult for her to achieve. She hailed from a family of business moguls and had inherited more than a pretty face. Her skills, and that of her family, lay in technology and surveillance, and my survival was single-handedly thanks to her expertise. She’d almost relished in proving that there was more to her than the title of Emilio’s wife.

  I stuffed the passport back into the envelope alongside the money, papers and tickets and looked up at her.

  “It’s a shame,” Carmen said quietly, stroking the soft fluff of hair on Javi’s head. He had fallen asleep somewhere in our exchange with no concern for what was happening around him. “You were proving to be a good friend.”

  “In another life,” I replied.

  In another life, in an alternate timeline, my days would be filled with people I loved. My father would be alive and happy, there would be no deaths resting on my conscience, and I would not be embarking on this journey alone. But life had other plans and it did me no good to waste time away thinking of what could have been. I had to focus on my future, and that meant letting go of everything from my past.

  “You truly weren’t meant for our world,” Carmen muttered sadly.

  Every time I heard that phrase, my stubborn spirit wanted to prove them wrong. It wanted to dig its heels in and show them I could fit the mold as well as the rest of them. I wasn’t able to, though. I’d failed to keep a lid on my emotions and let grief coax me away, and although the pain had faded and the fog that once clouded my mind had lifted, the damage was irreversible.