A Little Bit of Karma

by ReShonda Tate Billingsley

  “Oh, I’m sorry, you’re just screwing someone else and you were so guilt-ridden over having sex with your still-wife that it ate you up inside,” I snapped. “Yet you have the nerve to tell me you don’t love her, that she’s irrelevant. You’re just willing to throw away your marriage for her, so obviously it is about her.”

  “Our marriage isn’t ending because of her,” Jay said. “Our marriage has been over for a while, and you know that.”

  His declaration stung, but I refused to give him the satisfaction of knowing that.

  “No, I didn’t know that. I thought we were just having problems like everyone else,” I replied.

  “Okay, that’s enough,” Quincy interjected, as the two of us shot daggers at each other.

  “Are you okay?” Nicole whispered, squeezing my arm.

  I glared at Jay as I fought desperately to keep the tears at bay. “No, but I will be.”

  “Jay, man, what’s going on?” Quincy eased toward Jay.

  Jay let out a heavy sigh. “You know what? This is just too much. I don’t want to risk what she might do. She can just lead the retreat by herself. We can tell people I have the flu or something. Shoot, she can have the Lovejoy franchise. I’d even be willing to step aside and let her have the radio show.”

  “Don’t do me any favors. He can do the retreat and I can go home,” I snapped.

  “See, this is why I wanted Quincy here. I just want to make it very clear to her that I will sue her if she further damages my reputation.” He turned to Quincy. “Please remind her of the defamation clause in our contract. She’s so full of anger.”

  My mouth fell open in shock. Less than twelve hours ago this man had been making mad, passionate love to me and now he was talking about suing me?

  “Oh, this is un-freaking-believable. Let me tell you and Quincy what you can do with that defamation contract.”

  “Would you two just stop!” Nicole said.

  “Yeah,” Quincy added. “No one is going anywhere. Or suing anyone. I don’t care if you two are fighting like Ike and Tina: you will work this out—at least for now.”

  We turned our fury on him. He seemed to forget he worked for us. “You have a contract,” Quincy explained. The firmness in his voice told us he was serious. “Not only for this radio show, but another book, public appearances… and, uh, most important, the more than three thousand people who paid good money to be here.” The expression on his face said he was mortified that we would even entertain the idea of bailing on this conference.

  “Let me remind both of you.” Quincy pulled his briefcase onto the table, popped it open, and began sifting through the papers. He found what he was looking for and slid it across to Jay. “The Family First Foundation has already bought airline tickets, ad time, and paid expenses. They have spent, to date, four hundred sixty thousand dollars.”

  “What?” Jay and I said in unison. Jay picked up the paper and started reading it over.

  “Yes, airline tickets aren’t cheap, especially for two hundred couples,” Quincy continued. “Then there are hotels and the conference center; when we changed the venue, we incurred additional costs, which they covered, not to mention the labor to set up, and, of course, the advance you guys were paid.”

  “Well, we’ll give our advance back,” Jay said.

  “I’m not giving back anything,” I declared. “We’re not canceling because of me. I know how to honor my vows.” We had been paid a hefty sum for our services and I had no intention of giving that back. The money was securely tucked away in our joint savings account and even though we would have to split it, I would still get almost one hundred thousand dollars. At this rate, I was going to need every nickel I could get to secure my solo future.

  Jay released a groan. “Then I’ll just pay back the full advance myself.”

  Quincy sighed. “Man, are you not hearing me? You’re really going to pay back the advance, plus the four hundred sixty grand they’ve spent on everything, plus whatever they sue you for breach of contract?” He stopped to try to get the emotion out of his voice so that he could reason with us. “There are no ifs, ands, or buts about it. You’re contractually bound to go out there and give these people a show,” Quincy continued. “Remember, also, you have all the other speakers who have committed. Canceling wouldn’t go over well with them. Iyanla turned down another major event. She would definitely sue. And what about the book deal? It’s a two-book deal. Not fulfilling the terms of this contract would garner some really bad publicity and your publisher could pull the next book and demand that you pay back that advance. So if you don’t give the people what they came here for, you might as well hang up your career. Not to mention the fact that it will bankrupt you.”

  The room was silent before Jay finally said, “Whatever. I’m good. I came here prepared to do what I had to do, so I’ll do it.”

  “Both of you need to be good,” Quincy said, looking at me. “Release the emotions and operate in logic. Suck it up and figure out how to get along, at least through the next week. You do what you gotta do when you get back, but at least for the next five days, the Lovejoys are still one happy couple.”

  Pain resonated through my body. I trembled as I nodded. “I told you before I came here that I’ll do this. So I’ll do it. I don’t know why Jay felt the need to have you come remind me of that.”

  I grabbed my purse. “Now, let’s go to this VIP meet-and-greet and fake it through the week so my husband can get back home to his mistress.”

  I slipped my glasses back on and strutted out of the door.

  seven

  Today had been a rough day. Between the meet-and-greet, opening workshops, and constant press, I was worn out. So much so that I’d hopped in a cab and gone over to Sebastian’s on the Beach. It was no Buccaneer, but their cosmos were world-famous and it gave me a respite from Lovejoy fans.

  All day long, I’d gone through the motion of existing, because despite my outside demeanor, the quiet reality tore at my insides. My husband no longer loved me. That revelation ripped at my core, and I had to leave before I had a complete breakdown.

  I was just about to turn up my third drink when I spotted Nicole standing over me.

  “Ummm, how did you know I’d be here?”

  Nicole dropped her purse on the bar, then slid onto the seat next to me. “It’s my job to know.” She smiled. “I hacked your iCloud account and did ‘Find my iPhone.’ ”

  “Remind me to change my iCloud password,” I said, taking a sip of my drink.

  Nicole placed her hand on my arm; her eyes were sympathetic. “How are you, really? I know today was hard.”

  I shrugged. I didn’t really want to talk about it. “I’m fine, I guess.”

  “Hey, it’s just me,” Nicole said. “You know you don’t have to play the hard role with me.”

  That was true. The two of us had been through every one of my trifling boyfriends, all my heartbreaks and heartaches, my triumphs and tragedies. Nicole had finally settled down and was happily married to a wonderful man named Emerson, who worshipped the ground she walked on. In fact, every man Nicole had ever dated had put her on a pedestal, and as far as we knew, was completely faithful. She’d never known the heartache of infidelity. Maybe it was her model looks, her gorgeous and fit size 6 shape, and her wonderful personality, or perhaps the fact that she absolutely, positively loved sex—and was open to any- and everything with her man. Whatever the reason, she’d never have to worry about her husband up and leaving. Still, if anyone knew my pain, it was her.

  I took a deep breath and finally let a tear fall. “What did I do to deserve this?”

  Nicole reached over to hug me. “Nothing, sweetie. This isn’t your fault, but I know it’s hard.”

  “You have no idea,” I said, lifting my drink to take another sip.

  “I’m so sorry you’re going through this.”

  “Me too. I just wish we didn’t have to do this stupid retreat,” I moaned. “I can’t believe I’m
going to have to be around him and just pretend everything’s fine. It was so difficult today. These past few weeks have been an absolute nightmare. I’ve never experienced pain like this. I just don’t think I can do this.”

  “Yes, you can,” she said. “Just put that facade on for the week and everything will be fine. You’re putting on a show, remember? A show for which you’re being paid very well. You do your thing; then at the end of the week you collect the rest of your money, get ready to collect half Jay’s money, and tell him to go screw himself.” She motioned for the waiter to bring her a drink. “Lemon martini, please.” She turned back to me. “Has Jay said anything about the other woman?”

  “Nope, nothing. In fact, he just keeps trying to play it down and says she has nothing to do with this. He claims he only admitted to the affair because he didn’t want to lie to me.” I took a gulp of my drink. “He’s been lying to me for months, but now all of a sudden he’s developed a conscience.”

  “Maybe he’s telling the truth?” Nicole said, nodding her thanks as the bartender set her drink on the bar in front of her.

  I swallowed hard. “And maybe I’m going to divorce Jay and marry the Prince of England.”

  “I don’t think they’ll let two black girls marry princes.”

  Nicole was about to say something else when her phone rang. She picked it up and looked at the caller ID. “Oh, shoot, this is the camera crew from the production company we hired here. We’ve been playing phone tag. Hold on… Hello… Hey… I can barely hear you. Give me a second.” She pulled the phone back and looked at it. “The signal is bad in here.”

  “Go out on the patio,” the bartender said as he wiped the bar in front of us. “It’s better out there.”

  Nicole turned to me.

  “Girl, go handle your business. Somebody needs to keep stuff together,” I said.

  She looked apprehensive, then finally said, “Okay, I’m just going to step out to take this call. I’ll be right back.”

  I held up my drink. “And I’ll be right here.”

  As Nicole took her call, I stopped the bartender before he walked away. “Another drink, please.”

  “A pretty lady like you shouldn’t be drinking alone.”

  I turned to the deep, sexy voice that was coming from behind me. My words took flight and I was left speechless at the sight of the fine specimen standing before me. He had the richest, darkest skin I’d ever seen and a smile that made my woman parts dance.

  “Hi, I’m Ivan,” he said, extending his hand.

  “Ummm, h-hi…” I stuttered. Ivan took my hand, squeezing it gently as he shook it.

  “Mind if I sit down?” he said, motioning to the empty seat next to me.

  I was still thinking about how soft his hands were when he said, “The seat?”

  “Actually, umm, well, my friend just stepped outside to take a call.” I glanced toward the patio. “She’ll be back in a minute.”

  He slid onto the barstool and flashed that dazzling smile. “Then I guess I have just one minute to convince you why you should have dinner with me.”

  Maybe it was the cosmos, but his boldness turned me on. Or maybe it was the way that the fabric of his shirt wrapped his chest, just enough to show off his toned body, but not so much that it was too revealing.”

  I laughed. “You’re cute.”

  He frowned. “I work out six days a week. ‘Cute’ is never what I’m striving for.”

  I smiled. “And you’re funny.”

  Ivan glanced down at my left hand. “Ahh, I missed that,” he said, noticing my three-carat princess-cut Tiffany ring. “I’m sure the man who bought you that would not like the idea of you going to dinner with another man.”

  Ivan didn’t realize it, but he’d just given me even more reason to entertain him. If Jay could get him something on the side, so could I.

  “The ring is just for show now,” I said, wiggling my fingers. “The man who put it there didn’t care about the vows that went with it, so why should I?”

  Ivan smiled just as Nicole approached us. “Ahem,” she said, clearing her throat. “Am I interrupting something?” She raised an eyebrow in my direction.

  I smiled as Ivan stood and introduced himself. Nicole was obviously mesmerized by his rugged good looks as well.

  “Is that real?” she said, touching his biceps.

  He flexed his arm. “One hundred percent real. The result of hard work.”

  Nicole removed her hand like she’d touched a hot stove. “Whew. Well, Mr. Ivan, whatever you’re over here talking about, I guess I have to say thanks, because I saw my friend’s grin across the room and it’s been a minute since I’ve seen her smile.”

  I blushed as Ivan softly caressed my hand. His touch sent shivers up my spine.

  “And what a beautiful smile it is,” he said.

  “Umph,” Nicole muttered, looking slyly at me. I noticed her expression and shook myself out of the trance Ivan was lulling me into.

  “Shannon, I’m gonna have to go back to the convention center. The production crew is having some issues and I’m going to have to take care of them.” She glanced back over at Ivan, almost as if she hated to leave. “So, um, are you gonna be okay? I mean, maybe you should come with me.”

  Ivan and I exchanged glances. I was enjoying our conversation and I could tell he wanted me to stay. And more important, I wanted to stay.

  “Nah, I’m good,” I said. “I think I’m going to stay and chat with my new friend.”

  “Are you sure?” Nicole asked. “I mean, you’re a little tipsy.”

  “I’m fine. These drinks aren’t strong at all. I’ll catch a cab back over when I’m done,” I said. When I saw the concerned expression on her face, I added, “I promise I won’t leave this facility.”

  Ivan pointed to the ceiling in the corner of the bar. “And there are security cameras everywhere.”

  Nicole bit her bottom lip. “Let me see your license,” she told Ivan.

  I expected him to protest, but he laughed as he pulled out his wallet. “Here you go,” he said, handing her his ID.

  Nicole took her cell phone, snapped a picture of the ID, and handed it back to Ivan. “A girl can never be too careful.”

  Ivan shrugged as he took the license and put it back in his wallet.

  Nicole was still hesitant but said, “Okay, I’ll call you later to make sure you got back safely.” She moved closer to me, then whispered, “Are you sure you’re okay?”

  I flashed a reassuring smile. “I am. I’m sure.” And as I gave the gorgeous man in front of me another once-over, I knew I’d never been more sure about anything.

  After Nicole left, Ivan and I continued our conversation. It had been so natural to talk to him. I probably overshared—I told him that I was going through a divorce, that I was hurting, that I didn’t want be here in the Virgin Islands with Jay. And Ivan had just listened.

  “Excuse me, it’s last call,” the bartender said just as Ivan said something to make me laugh. I was shocked that in the midst of my pain, this man was able to give me some momentary joy.

  “Wow, I didn’t realize it was so late,” I said. “You can close out my tab.”

  Ivan held up his hand. “Wait, I got it.” He slid a credit card across the bar.

  “Thank you,” I said. “You didn’t have to do that.”

  “I know,” he said. “I wanted to.”

  “I probably have talked you to death,” I said. I stood and had to immediately sit back down. “Oooh.” I was definitely feeling tipsy.

  “You okay?” he asked.

  “I’m good,” I said, shaking it off. “All the cosmos.”

  Ivan bit down on his bottom lip. “I enjoyed you.”

  “I enjoyed you as well. I hate that the night has to end,” I said.

  He paused, then said, “It doesn’t have to.”

  I felt my insides twitch, like they were trying to answer before my head did. Ivan sensed my hesitation because he said, “You
r husband is a fool. Any man who would choose another woman over you needs his head examined.”

  I paused as his words hung in the air. “You staying here?” I found myself saying.

  Ivan nodded. “Room five twelve.”

  Today was amazing. I will be dreaming about you inside me all night. I love you.

  The words of my husband’s mistress replayed in my head and I found myself saying, “You feel like company?”

  eight

  Heartbreak could turn you into a damn fool. I had no doubt of that fact as I assessed my current situation. I was really in a hotel room with a stranger. Even worse, I was really in a hotel room with a stranger, about to have sex.

  The battle between good and evil was raging inside me.

  “You’re better than this.”

  “You’re a grown woman. Do you.”

  “Jay doesn’t want you. Get with someone who does.”

  “What’s good for the goose…”

  I tried to silence the internal debate. Yes, Ivan was sending electromagnetic waves through my body that I hadn’t known were possible. But the fact remained that I didn’t know this man. Right now, though, my body didn’t seem to care.

  Common sense banged on my door, then kicked it in.

  “Wait,” I muttered as Ivan reached behind my back to remove my bra. Things were moving at rapid speed. “I… this…” I stopped his hands before they could get the clasp loose.

  “Shhh,” he told me, taking my hand and gently easing it off his. “Let me make you feel like you deserve to feel.” He kissed my neck. I moaned, and then he muttered, “But if you really want me to stop, I will.”

  “I… I’m not thinking straight,” I managed to say, my words heavy and hoarse.

  Ivan paused, then sat up on the bed. My insides screamed for him to keep going.

  “Look, I don’t want to take advantage of you but you’re a beautiful woman. And if your man couldn’t see that and appreciate that, you need to allow someone who does appreciate”—he looked at my body and licked his lips—“appreciate all of this.”