Faded Realms

by C. R. Jane

  “A dead body that resembles Mason,” I say, my words coming out muffled since I’m pressed tightly against Damon’s chest.

  “You noticed that too?” says Mason, wryly.

  Damon gently releases me. “I’m going down there to see if there’s anything I can find out,” he says, walking towards the door.

  I’m suddenly filled with the irrational fear that if he walks out the door, I’m never going to see him again. My powers rush out slamming the door shut in front of Damon before he can leave.

  “Wow...baby, what was that for?” he asks, looking back at me in shock.

  I’m embarrassed by my reaction, but I don’t want him to leave. And where is Beckham? He needs to be here with me right now, so I can make sure that he’s alright.

  “Someone’s been watching me,” I tell them, my eyes focused on Damon’s since I know that he will be the one that is most upset by the fact that I haven’t mentioned it yet.

  Damon freezes, his eyes locked on mine, and suddenly I’m very nervous.

  “And how long has this been going on?” he says, his voice soft but so menacing that it’s as if he’s screaming at me.

  Mason takes a step towards me, but Damon holds up a hand, never taking his eyes away from mine. “Don’t touch her. She doesn’t get to be coddled when she’s been withholding something important once again,” he says to him. “How long, Eva?” he repeats, spitting the words out.

  “Almost since we returned,” I tell him, feeling the shame well up inside of me as I remember the conversation I just had with him about not keeping secrets. Even with this out, there’s still a major secret that I’m hiding, that no matter the consequences I don’t want to tell them.

  “I can’t even look at you,” says Damon, his face a mix of anger and pain. I take a step towards him, my hand reaching out to touch him and he steps back. Him stepping back hurts more than his words.

  “Stay with her,” he barks at Mason, who in turn looks offended that Damon thought he needed to say that. Damon then marches out the door, slamming it behind him.

  Mason and I stand in the room, both not moving or making a sound. Mason’s not looking at me and I can’t bear to see the condemnation that’s sure to be in his gaze, so I walk out of the room and go to my room, a room that I’ve never actually slept in.

  I pull out my phone to text Beckham, feeling the same urgency as I did right before Damon was about to leave that I needed to find out where he was.

  Me: Where are you?

  Beckham: Just got back to my place and missing you as always. Took forever to finish that last scene.

  I’m tempted to ask him to come over so that he’s under the same roof as me, but I hold in the crazy. I still am desperate to see his face even if I’m not going to ask him to come over though, and I press the video button on my phone so that I can see him.

  He answers right away and I devour his face. He’s already in bed and he looks like he was well on his way to falling asleep based on the exhausted look he’s wearing.

  “Hi, angel,” he says, and I close my eyes for half a second as the love I feel for him threatens to overwhelm me.

  “I just wanted to see your face,” I tell him.

  “I need some alone time with you,” he says, his eyes and voice full of longing.

  “Tomorrow night can you spend the night here?” he asks. Despite how this evening ended, and the fact that it’s wildly inappropriate considering there’s a dead body laying fifty stories below me, my body clenches up as I think about what a night with Beckham entails.

  “I’d like that,” I tell him, and Beckham’s face lights up. I feel a rush of regret. I haven’t been doing a very good job of balancing my time since we’ve gotten back from China. I need to do better.

  He gets a text as we’re talking, and I know that it’s about what happened tonight when Beckham’s face darkens.

  “Something you forgot to mention, Angel?” he asks.

  I reluctantly hurriedly tell him about the body that Mason and I saw tonight and about the fact that I believe that someone has been watching me for some time. He’s quiet after I finish except for the twitching in his cheek.

  “I’m picking you up as soon as my shoot is done tomorrow,” he says, and I just nod in reply.

  I’m surprised when Beckham spends only another minute more recovering before he starts telling me about his annoying director on the film, he’s making up scenes for. We talk for another hour before I hear the front door open and I can sense that Damon has returned. I want to go out and check on him, but I remember the look on his face before he left, and like the coward I am I stay in bed.

  I finally send Beckham to bed after he casually mentions his four A.M. wakeup call that’s coming in just a few hours. I lay there in the dark, scared to go to sleep since lately what waits for me in my dreams is everything I want to avoid. I finally fall asleep and just like I feared...I dream.

  He’s sitting on the edge of my bed when I wake up, and I’m horrified that Aiden managed to get in my room without me knowing. I thought that I slept too lightly to ever miss someone entering my room, but obviously I was wrong. How often has Aiden been in here without me knowing.

  “The guards have told me that you’ve been on your best behavior as of late,” Aiden says in a sweet tone as he admires me.

  I quickly pull up my blankets so that I’m more covered, feeling sick as usual with the way he looks at me.

  “You behaving sounds very much unlike you. Should I be concerned?” he asks with a sinister smile, in fact sounding very unconcerned.

  “I think I learned my lesson,” I tell him sarcastically, ignoring how my heart burns when I think of Mason. For a second, I let myself imagine what it would feel like to wrap one of the ropes of ivy I’ve learned to control around Aiden’s neck, but then I push the thought away. I’ve seen his power and he could easily counter anything like that.

  “I just want to remind you of something, just in case that remarkable mind of yours is planning anything that would be against your better interest,” he tells me, and I grow cold when he conjures some kind of bubble in the air in front of us. I’ve never seen anything like it, and I’m even more shocked when the surface of the bubble flickers and all of a sudden, I’m watching Beckham.

  I haven’t seen him in what feels like forever, and despite the fact that he looks gaunt and tired, with deep purple shadows under his eyes, I feel like I’ve just gotten a hit of my favorite drug. I’m so enthralled with looking at him that it takes me a second to notice that there’s a beautiful brunette female fae standing next to him as he talks to another courtier. I wouldn’t think anything of it except for the fact that she has her hand on his arm and it’s sitting there like touching him is no big deal, like she’s done it a million times before. When her arm starts to slide around his waist I look away, not able to continue watching because my heart feels like it’s failing. Aiden had mentioned to me that Beckham had moved on, but I hadn’t really believed it. Now I’m not sure what to believe.

  Aiden chuckles before moving the bubble back in front of my face with a lazy wave of his hand. I’m reminded of how much power he has and not for the first time I’m confused how he has managed to amass more power than me, the ruler of Fairie.

  As I’m forced to resume watching, I notice a dark shape standing in the shadows of a column behind where Beckham is standing. The shape moves, and I’m horrified to realize that it’s a person. When whoever it is moves again, I see the glint of a sword attached to the person’s hip as well as the glint of sharp teeth.

  “Oh good, you finally noticed my friend. He’s been watching Beckham for quite some time. He’ll continue to only ‘watch’ him if you begin to cooperate.”

  He waves his hand again and the bubble disappears. He then takes my chin harshly in his hand. “Do we have an understanding, my darling?” he asks in a calm voice.

  I shakily nod, hate pouring from my gaze.

  “Good,” he says happily, befor
e placing a firm kiss on my lips and standing up from the bed.

  I’m having trouble controlling my shaking body as I watch him leave the room. Unable to control the tide of emotion welling up inside of me, I run to the window and cry out as a bolt of energy that I’ve never seen before rushes out of my chest.

  Looking out my window to the ground below, I’m tempted to throw myself out of it.

  And then suddenly it’s not a temptation that I ignore, it’s something I have to do, despite the fact that I’ve had the same thought every day since Mason died. Feeling like I’m in a dream, I step onto the windowsill. Before I can think it through, I step off the ledge...and I begin to fall.

  Intrinsically I know that I can just shoot out my wings and save myself, but as I fall I wonder what the point is. I’m so tired. So tired of failing, failing Fairie, failing Mason and Beckham...failing myself.

  I see the ground approaching and I close my eyes, ready for all of it to end. All of a sudden two strong arms grip me, the person’s chest is so hard it’s like I’ve hit a rock wall and my breath gets knocked out of me. I open my eyes and find myself staring into familiar, brilliant emerald eyes.

  Damon’s eyes are scared and furious, and they remain locked on mine as we soar through the air. We finally land about a mile away from the castle. I feel his arms squeeze me tightly before he lets me go. I immediately miss the warmth of his body, but yet I take a few steps back, unable to allow myself to take comfort from this stranger.

  What almost just happened hits me and I collapse to the ground, my entire body trembling as tears stream down my face. What just happened? What did I just do? I look up at Damon through my blurry eyes. He’s standing there, fury blazed in his eyes as he stares at me. He takes a step towards me and I shrink back even more, unable to tear my eyes from him.

  Damon’s on me before I can react. He lifts me up, his lips crushing against mine. I can taste my sadness on his lips. His kiss wipes away all my thoughts. I’m intoxicated by him, my despair melting into desire as he slides a hand up to grip my neck. He presses me against a large rock and my legs wrap around his waist. I don’t want this moment to end. The thread that seems to connect the two of us strengthens until I’m not sure if I could even sever it if I wanted to.

  He pulls away. “What were you thinking?” he growls.

  His words make me sob even harder thinking of how much I almost betrayed Fairie, betrayed everyone I had been born to serve and protect. Fairie’s power would have died with me. Mason’s sacrifice for me would have been in vain. My sacrifice in letting Beckham go would have been in vain.

  Although I don’t have any answers, although my powers are still out of control, the land is still cursed, and Mason is dead. Although defeating Aiden seems almost insurmountable at this point...I will continue to fight. I will not abandon my people.

  Looking up at Damon I know I could very well be signing his death warrant. Despite that fact, I look up at his gorgeous face, my heart pattering with an odd mix of desire and resolution...and I ask him for help.

  Morning comes and my eyes open, remnants of the dream hovering within my consciousness. The penthouse is quiet, either everyone still asleep or already gone for the day. The sunlight streaming through the windows in my room make last night’s events seem like they happened long ago, or didn’t happen at all.

  But then I remember the vacant eyes of the man who resembled Mason, laying there in a pool of blood. I think back to the body laying by the front doors of the building and grimace at the thought of the blood permanently staining the concrete in front of the door.

  I still want to believe that the attack has nothing to do with me, that I wasn’t responsible for an innocent man’s death. It seems unlikely that I could be that lucky though.

  My phone chimes. It’s a message from Beckham asking me if I’m still his tonight. I text back “I’m always yours,” feeling cheesy, but not caring. I get out of bed, his message effectively chasing away my dark thoughts. I still don’t see a sign of anyone, but I can sense that at least one of the guys is still nearby. Not wanting to dredge up the events of the night before, I avoid trying to find them. Instead, I grab a poppyseed muffin and curl up on the couch, flipping through the channels until I find the Hallmark channel. Watching a Christmas movie under the twinkling lights of the Christmas tree gives me respite from whatever lays in wait for me for at least a little while.

  10

  The day passes agonizingly slow. I learn that it’s Damon floating around the apartment still when he comes into the kitchen after working out. His chest has that light sheen of sweat that I find so delicious and I swear he’s trying to torture me by coming in here with his shirt off. He doesn’t say a word to me, but the ever-present tension that exists between us heightens as he makes himself a protein shake. I pretend to ignore him right back, but I can’t prevent myself from glancing at him every couple of minutes.

  Once he leaves the room...still without speaking to me, I try to get some more classwork done. But since I’m practically ahead at this point due to how fast I absorb information now that my powers are developing more, there’s not much I can do. The thought of starting classes again next month fills me with both happiness and dread. While I’m excited at the thought of taking new classes, there’s no denying that I’m not the same girl I was when I first started the school year. I think it will be impossible for me to go back to pretending I’m a normal college student.

  I’m also dreading running into Selena again around campus. She had still been texting Damon so much that he finally just blocked her number. Sometimes she would text from other random numbers. I knew first hand that obsession like that never led to anything good. Before I had been taken by the Reverend, she had made it her personal mission to try and make my life miserable. At least now I knew that I could just blast her away if I needed to.

  I spend a few hours practicing my powers, trying to make things move around the room. The results are lackluster at best. My powers only seem to be heightened by strong emotions, and evidently conflicting emotions, like the ones I’m currently experiencing, don’t quite do it. I think of the gold cage I trapped Aiden in and it’s hard to comprehend that I actually was capable of that.

  When I first got back from China, I felt powerful, exhausted and malnourished, but powerful. As the days pass that sense of power evaporates especially because the guys, mostly Damon, continue to treat me like I’m incapable of doing anything. That will have to change.

  Beckham texts me that he’s just finishing shooting his last scene of the day, and I hurry to get ready. He told me to dress warm and casual last night when I was talking to him, so I get dressed in jeans and a tan, cowl neck sweater. I put a beanie over my head for good measure and turn to look at myself in the mirror.

  I still haven’t gained back all of the weight that I had lost, and there’s a haunted look in my eyes that wasn’t there before. Although all of my feathers have grown back on my wings from Aiden’s abuse, I haven’t tried them out yet. Every time I thought about it they would start to ache and I would remember how much agony I had been in when I first woke up from Aiden’s nightmare. It wasn’t a pain I wanted to experience again.

  My phone beeps with a text and once again it’s Beckham. He succeeds again in pushing away the dark thoughts that are always waiting for me. The text says he’s coming around the corner and even though I know that he will be up to get me momentarily, it’s suddenly urgent that I see him right away. I can’t wait another minute more.

  I rush out the door, yelling behind me that I’m meeting Beckham, knowing that Damon will hear me wherever he is. My abrupt appearance startles the guards that are never far away and although no one has said anything, I’m not an idiot that would assume the security guards were just a random safety precaution. If I was a betting girl, I would say Damon was the instigator.

  The elevator’s descent seems to take forever. I jog through the lobby and Beckham’s there, getting out of the car right ou
tside the lobby doors. I spare a quick glance at the ground, but there’s no sign of the dark, red stain from the night before. Beckham pulls me into his arms and although it hasn’t even been that long, reuniting with him feels like it always does, like I’ve come home. I take a look behind me right before we get in the car, and I’m not surprised to see Damon’s brooding angry gaze staring back at me.

  We get in the car and no sooner has the door closed than Beckham’s lips are crushing against mine with an urgency I thought existed only in the movies he makes. Strong arms coil around my waist, tightening possessively as he cradles my back. His taste is addicting as usual and I wonder if I’ll ever get enough. My lips part instinctively as his tongue slides into my mouth. His kiss is forceful-demanding- and I find myself slipping under his control, my body molding against his as I soften under the heat of our embrace. His tongue flicks lazily against my teeth, and my mouth spreads wider in welcome. He accepts, thrusting his tongue deeper, drawing my own into his mouth and capturing it with a languid suction. I buckle in my seat weakly, my body ready to sink to the floor of the car, but he pulls me closer to him, the hardness of his body bracing me. His hand slips from my waist to the hollow at the small of my back. The intimate gesture spurs me to life, and my fingers tangle into his golden, silky hair as I hold on to the kiss, certain I will fade to nothing without his body crushed against mine.

  When he finally releases me, it’s too soon, even though his hand stays on the small of my back, I almost fall off his lap. He holds me steady though, as if he’s anticipated my reaction. He probably did anticipate my action now that I think about it. He’s known me for so long, longer than I can even remember. He can probably predict most everything I do with ease.

  I sigh and breathe in his scent. I’ve missed him, just a day has gone by since I’ve last seen him, but he’s made me need him so much that I feel withdrawal whenever he isn’t near. I glance up at his eyes and see so much ragged passion burning in his eyes that it sucks the breath from me, and I can’t speak for a moment. My body craves the taste of him and I lean towards him, desperate for another hit.