Kiss Me There

by E. L. Todd

  Volt watched my actions, growing more interested.

  I came around the table and stood by his side. “I’m trying to get Natalie to go out and meet someone.”

  “Why?”

  “Because…” I nodded toward Jared.

  He followed my gaze and turned back to me. “Because?”

  “She’s into Jared, but he’s not into her. She looks desperate, you know? I can’t let her make an idiot out of herself.”

  He shrugged. “I don’t see how that’s your problem.”

  “She’s my friend.”

  “But you haven’t known her long.”

  “So? That doesn’t matter.”

  “I guess I could sleep with her.” He shrugged like he was trying to be humble when doing something heroic.

  I glared at him.

  “What?” he asked innocently.

  “You will not sleep with her.”

  “Why not?” he countered.

  “Because she’s your friend. You don’t sleep with your friends.”

  “I know but you want to help her out, right?”

  “I want her to move on and have a relationship with someone else. A night of hot sex won’t change anything.”

  He grinned like he was remembering a fond memory. “You obviously haven’t had any hot sex then.”

  “Yes, I have.” I sounded far more defensive than I meant to, and I knew that was because all I’d ever had was mediocre sex. Sometimes I would get off, but most of the time, I wouldn’t. I wasn’t sure if it was the size of the ship or the motion of the ocean. But whatever it was, it wasn’t working. Maybe it was me. Geez, I hoped not.

  Volt smiled like he saw right through my words. “I’m always at your disposal if you need to let off some steam.”

  “Don’t be gross.”

  “Sex isn’t gross.”

  “It is with you.”

  “What’s that supposed to mean?” he countered.

  “You probably have chlamydia or something.”

  “I always use condoms, and I get tested regularly—I’m good.”

  “Even so, I’m not interested.”

  “Whatever,” he said. “When you change your mind, just let me know.”

  I’d never change my mind. I liked him much more as a friend than a fuck buddy. I’d never sink that low. “Don’t hold your breath.”

  “So, when are we doing this?”

  “Doing what?” I hadn’t agreed to anything.

  “Finding your Prince Charming.”

  “I never said I was looking for Prince Charming. I just want a nice guy.”

  “In New York City, there’s no such thing. Maybe you should go back to Washington.”

  I would if I could.

  “You can come so I can prove how wrong you are.”

  “And how will you prove that?”

  “I’ll find a nice guy.”

  He chuckled. “Good luck with that.”

  “I’m serious.”

  “I’m sure you are.” He walked around the table like he owned the place and everyone in it. His arrogance was charming at times, but now it was just annoying.

  “My priority is getting Natalie out of her funk.”

  “She’s not your problem, Tayz. If she wants to follow a guy around, that’s her right.”

  “But I think she’d feel differently if she knew everything.”

  “Then tell her.”

  I couldn’t do that. She would be so humiliated she would never recover. “I think it’s easier if I just find someone else for her. She’s smart, beautiful, and really sweet. She deserves a man who notices her as much as she notices him.”

  He shook his head then lined up his next shot. “Why can you go out with her and but not with me?”

  “Why do you want to go out with me so bad?” I countered.

  “If I walk in with a woman, all the others will fight for me more.”

  “That doesn’t make any sense.” He should be off limits.

  “Women like a man they can’t have.”

  That’s disgusting. “I would never go after a man in a relationship.”

  “The rest of the world doesn’t share your morality.”

  Volt had a strange outlook on life. He thought everyone was innately evil and there were no good people in the world, which was strange since he molded the minds of young people and prepared them for the world. He told me not to analyze him, but I couldn’t help it. I wanted his secrets, answers to unspoken questions. “I think most people do.”

  He shook his head in response.

  “Friday night then?”

  “I’m down.” He hit another ball and sunk it into the corner. All that remained was the eight ball and some of my own solids. “After that, we’re going to teach you how to play pool—because you suck.”

  Chapter Six

  Volt

  Somehow, without even realizing it, Taylor became my friend.

  When I first met her, I thought she was some awkward woman, and then I got to know her better and I wanted to have a one-night stand. But then she told me off and demanded the respect I didn’t give her.

  And boom! We were friends.

  I’d never had a friend that was a girl. There was always sex involved, and if sex couldn’t be had, there were some decent hand jobs. Natalie and I were friends, in a way. But I viewed her as Derek’s sister most of the time.

  After I got off work, I was walking to my apartment when Taylor texted me.

  The Muffin Girl.

  She usually sent me these cryptic text messages, and it was my job to figure out what she was trying to say. Now?

  She sent an emoji of a blueberry muffin.

  That wasn’t too complicated to decipher. On the way.

  She sent me a picture she took of herself. She was shoving the entire muffin into her mouth like a snake that was swallowing a mouse whole.

  I chuckled and typed a reply. Damn, that’s sexy.

  Then she sent me an emoji of a hand flipping me off.

  I laughed then shoved my phone into my pocket. I walked to the bakery and spotted her sitting outside at one of the picnic tables. She wore a long pink dress with a purple cardigan over it, her usual classroom attire. She looked like a stereotypical schoolteacher, classy but also a little nerdy. Her long brown hair was in curls and she wore a large sun hat to keep the sun out of her eyes. She looked like she belonged at the beach—minus the cardigan. “When you start a dating profile, you should make that picture as your profile picture.”

  “So no one will be interested in me?”

  “No one is going to be interested in you anyway.”

  She gave me a playful kick under the table.

  “What’s this?” I spotted the coffee and muffin on my side of the table.

  “I figured you didn’t want to wait in line.”

  “But how did you know I would come?”

  She shrugged. “You don’t have any friends besides me so what else would you be doing?”

  She made me smile bigger when I didn’t think it was possible. “Touché.”

  “So, how was your day?”

  “Pretty boring. I was in my office the entire time.”

  “Looking at porn? Or working?”

  I chuckled. “I don’t watch porn.”

  She stopped in mid-bite and gave me an incredulous expression.

  “I really don’t.” I had no reason to lie—especially to her.

  She looked at me like she didn’t believe a word I said.

  “Why would I watch porn when I’m getting laid all the time? Believe me, I don’t need my hand for anything besides writing with a pen.”

  “I guess that’s true,” she said. “For a second, I thought you were lying because all guys watch porn. Shit, I even watch porn.”

  I was about to grab my muffin but stopped when I heard what she said. I immediately pictured her laying in bed with her hand between her legs. Her bedroom was dark and the light from her computer displayed her flushed ch
eeks and parted lips. She breathed deeply, moaning as she watched some man pound into his partner. Her fingers worked her pussy aggressively, bringing her to the edge of a powerful climax.

  “Volt?”

  I zoned out for a moment there, and I wasn’t sure how much time had passed. “Huh?”

  “You just got a weird look on your face.”

  Because I was picturing her masturbating—and I got a hard-on from it. “I realized I forgot something at the office.”

  Thankfully, she bought my excuse. “Work has been a struggle lately.”

  “What’s up?”

  “I’m having a hard time getting the kids to pay attention. The other day, I was lecturing and spotted them exchanging notes in the reflection of the white board.”

  “Did you say anything?”

  “No. I didn’t see the point.” She picked at her muffin. “I know kids aren’t going to be soldiers, but I expected more from them.”

  “Do you hold them accountable for bad behavior?”

  “Yes. When I’m not pretending I don’t see it…”

  “Are the assignments too much or too little?”

  “I thought I wasn’t challenging them enough, so I increased the work load and increased the difficulty of the content, but it doesn’t seem to have made a difference. They just aren’t interested—for whatever reason. These kids are future diplomats, physicians, and rocket scientists. I just assumed they would be eager to learn.”

  When it came to the culture of a classroom, there wasn’t any specific factor that determined how it would flow. “In my first year, the kids gave me a hard time. They knew I was a brand new teacher that was learning the ropes as I went. But when I became the wrestling coach, it really smoothed things over.”

  “What does that have to do with anything?”

  “I became a member of their community. I was a face they saw outside the classroom, and I had a respectable position within the school community. The more involved you are with the school, the more respect they’ll give you.”

  “Never thought about it that way.”

  “It really makes a difference.”

  “But what could I get involved in?” she asked. “I’m already teaching all day and preparing lesson plans at night when I go home. How would I squeeze in another activity?”

  “Maybe you could do a club or something.”

  “Eh.” She shrugged with disinterest.

  “Academic decathlon?”

  “God, no. That will take up all of my time.”

  “Did you play sports in high school?”

  “Does sunbathing count?”

  I laughed when I pictured her laying out on the school lawn. “I don’t think so.”

  “I guess I could find something… I just don’t want to take extra time out of my day. I have a million things to do as it is.”

  “It’ll help you get tenured quicker.”

  “It will?” she asked.

  “Yeah. The more courses you teach and the more involved you are in the school, the more likely it is they’ll want to keep you indefinitely.”

  She stared at me with impressed eyes. “Good thing I have a friend that can share all of his secrets with me.”

  “I don’t know if they’re secrets, but I’m a fountain of knowledge.”

  “Well, I’ll look into it tomorrow and see if there’s something I can get involved with. So these brats will start listening to me.”

  “I can sit in if you’d like.”

  “Sit in?” she asked.

  “You know, observe your class for a week and analyze it. It might be helpful.”

  “You would do that?” she asked incredulously.

  “Why not?” We were friends, right?

  “That would help me out so much. I need an expert to point out what I’m doing wrong and what I’m doing right.” She clutched her chest in gratitude. “Thank you so much.”

  “It’s really not a big deal. And I’ll definitely point out every little thing you do wrong.” I took a bite of my muffin and winked.

  She was so grateful with my offer that she didn’t seem to care. “I’ll get it cleared with administration.”

  “Don’t worry about it. I’ll take care of it.” It’d be a lot quicker if I did it on my end. I knew all the right people in all the right places, including my father.

  “Well, thanks for helping me out. I’m sure you have more important things to do.”

  “I really don’t mind. Besides, you bought me a coffee and a muffin. I have to repay you.”

  “I’m repaying you for buying that enormous bag of pastries that I didn’t need.”

  “Did you eat them all?”

  She looked away and avoided the question.

  “Seriously? You ate all of that?”

  “Not in one day,” she snapped. “And my friend ate some too.”

  “Your friend? I thought I was your only friend.”

  She threw a crumb at my face. “No, you aren’t. She and I have been friends forever.”

  “Is she cute?” I was always looking for new tail.

  “She’s not your type.”

  “Is she a man?”

  “She got out of a relationship recently and she hasn’t mended yet.”

  “Even better. I can help her get over her ex.”

  She rolled her eyes. “I’m keeping her away from you.”

  “Now that she’s forbidden, I want her more…”

  “Are you five?” she asked incredulously.

  I shrugged. “I’d say I’m sixteen—immature and just hit puberty.”

  “You hit the nail right on the head.” She finished her muffin then downed her coffee. “Well, I have to get going. I have shit to grade.”

  “Their work is literally shit?”

  “Unfortunately.” She patted me on the shoulder and walked off.

  I craned my neck uncomfortably and watched her walk away. She swayed her hips as she walked and her brown hair bounced as she moved. Her ass was decipherable in the dress, and I stared at it until she was out of sight.

  ***

  When I picked her up on Friday night, she was wearing one of her schoolteacher dresses. It was loose around her body, and had bees all over it. She wore a necklace with a dangling beehive and sandals were on her feet.

  “You’re going to change, right?”

  “What’s wrong with this?” She looked down at herself, having no idea what I was talking about.

  “We’re going to a bar. That’s not how chicks dress.”

  “But I don’t want to wear a mini skirt and a tube top. I can’t pull it off.”

  “What the hell are you talking about?” I checked out her ass the other day and it was perfect.

  “I’m twenty-seven years old. I’m ancient.”

  “And I’m thirty-two. What does that matter?”

  “I can’t dress like a twenty-one-year-old anymore. I don’t have the body for it.”

  It took all my strength not to roll my eyes. “That’s the biggest tub of horseshit I’ve ever heard of.”

  “It’s true. Plus, I’m a schoolteacher.”

  “That means you can’t have a life outside the classroom? You think you’re going to run into one of your students?”

  She crossed her arms over her chest, giving me a pissy look.

  “Let me prove it to you.” I walked into her apartment without being invited and immediately headed for the bedroom I assumed belonged to her.

  “Please, come in…” She shut the door and followed me.

  I opened her closet door and peered at my options. Honestly, there weren’t many.

  “Please, go through my things…”

  Her clothes were carefully coordinated by color and season. The back of the door held a jewelry hook, where her necklaces of the universe and animals hung. On the top shelf were her shoes, most of them sandals.

  I was looking into an old woman’s closet.

  “I don’t even own anything sexy so you’re wastin
g your time.”

  I moved her clothes over the rack and quickly browsed through them, searching for something somewhat sexy.

  “You’re wasting your time.” She sat on the edge of the bed behind her, her arms crossed.

  Tucked away in the back corner was a slender black dress. It was a tube top with a sweetheart shape in the front. When I held it before my eyes, it looked like a flimsy piece of material that would barely cover anything.

  It was perfect.

  “This.” I tossed it on her lap.

  She squinted as she examined the dress, like she didn’t know what it was. “I forgot about this. My friend got it for me.”

  “Because she knew you’d look hot in it.”

  “Like, three years ago.”

  “Shut up and put it on.” I rummaged through her closet until I found black heels that matched.

  She held the dress up in front of her face. “I doubt it even fits anymore.”

  She was slender so I was sure it was fine. “Just give it a try.”

  “I’m going to look ridiculous if I wear this. I’m going to stick out like a sore thumb.”

  “You already stick out like a sore thumb.” I set the shoes on the bed beside her. “Now get to it.”

  She sighed as she held the dress in her fingertips. Then she looked up at me, an expectant expression in her eyes.

  I didn’t know what the hold up was. “What?”

  “Do you really think I’m going to let you watch me change?”

  Wasn’t thinking. “I was hoping you would just go for it.”

  “Nope.”

  I left her bedroom then stood on the other side of the door. “I want to see it on you. Don’t you dare take it off before I get a peek.”

  “What if it doesn’t fit and it’s halfway up my thighs?”

  “I still want to see it.”

  “Believe me, you don’t.”

  “Stop talking and start changing.”

  She fumbled on the other side of the door, hopping around as she tried to get the skintight dress on. A few humphs and heaves reached my ears, and I expected the worst. It would be on upside down, or worse, backwards.

  “You done yet?” I leaned against the door with my arms crossed over my chest. I looked directly into her living room and kitchen, examining the way she decorated her home. Beige couches contrasted against the hardwood floor, and colored pillows were arranged on the cushions. Her kitchen table was made of black wood and it stuck out in comparison to everything else. It was elegant and sleek but it also had personality—her personality.