Falling for the Forbidden: 10 Full-Length Novels

by Jessica Hawkins

* * *

  I’m hanging out the laundry when a whistle catches my attention. The driver from yesterday enters through the courtyard door.

  “Morning.” He offers me an uncertain smile, eyeing my uniform. “How are you?”

  I don’t know what to make of his greeting, so I simply say, “Fine, thank you.”

  “I’m Quincy.”

  I tug a stray strand of hair behind my ear. “Hi.”

  When I resume hanging the washing, he cuts the small talk. “I came to warn you not to come outside before clearing it with the guard house.”

  “The guard house?”

  “We live in a staff house at the back of the estate. There’s a phone in the kitchen. If you dial the button marked guard house, one of us will pick up.”

  “Oh.”

  “Next time, if the door is open,” he motions at the garden access, “call before you come outside.”

  “Why?”

  “Gabriel keeps a guard dog. He patrols the garden, and we’ve had an accident before.”

  “Okay.”

  “Well then, have a nice day.” He must realize what a stupid thing that is to say, because his cheekbones turn a shade darker. “See you later.” With an awkward salute, he hurries away.

  Picking up the empty basket, I notice Marie in front of the kitchen window, watching me.

  * * *

  Sometime during the day, Gabriel and Magda must’ve left, because they’re gone when Carly comes home at five. Judging by her casual clothes and the late hour of her return, she attends a private school. Public schools require uniforms and are out before lunchtime. Marie has already left when Carly finds me ironing in the scullery.

  “Valentina, right?” She leans on the wall and bites into a peach.

  “That’s right.”

  “My dad didn’t say he was hiring a maid.” She regards me from under her lashes. “Can you bake?”

  “Yes.”

  “Will you bake me a cake for dessert? Marie made flan. I hate flan.”

  I crane my neck to check the time on the wall clock in the kitchen. I need to finish earlier tonight so I can do my homework, but I can fit something in if it’s not too complicated.

  “What do you like?”

  She swings the fruit by the stalk. “Anything with coconut.”

  I know a simple recipe for honey and coconut cake that doesn’t take long. The ingredients are common enough. The chances are good I’ll find everything I need in the pantry. I switch off the iron. “All right.”

  When the base cake comes out of the oven, I pour the melted butter, honey, and shredded coconut over the top, and caramelize it to a crispy brown under the grill. Carly leans on the kitchen counter as I remove the cake, her blonde hair hanging in a braid down her back. She’s a stunning girl. She doesn’t take after her father. Her mom must be gorgeous.

  Carly sniffs appreciatively. “That smells good. I’ll have a slice now.”

  She’s not a child, but I say what I’d say to Charlie. “You’ll spoil your appetite for dinner.”

  “Come on, Valentina.” She pouts. “My mom never lets me have sweets. It’s bad for my figure.” She motions at her body on which there isn’t an ounce of fat. “Daddy will be home any minute now, and I don’t want him to know I’m snacking before meals. I’ll never hear the end of it.”

  “You’re a big girl.” I push the cake toward her. “Don’t say it’s my fault if you’re not hungry for proper food later.”

  “Oh,” she winks, “I won’t.” She cuts a generous slice and bites into the warm cake, humming her approval. “Oh, my God, this is so good.”

  “I’m glad you like it.” I return to my work, happy that I pleased her. Instinct tells me getting on with Carly won’t be smooth sailing.

  Twenty minutes later, I’m folding the last of the ironed shirts when Gabriel’s thunderous voice bursts through the house.

  “Valentina!”

  Oscar scoots off the top of the tumble dryer where he’s been sleeping and escapes to my room. I jump, burning my arm on the still-hot iron. A second later, Gabriel storms into the kitchen, almost knocking me off my feet as I exit through the scullery door.

  He grabs my arm, his fingers digging into my flesh. His face is pale, making the red scars stand out more. “There’s a first aid kit in the pantry. Top shelf on the left. Get it and bring it to the television room.”

  Chapter Four

  Valentina

  I jump to execute the command, running through every lounge on the ground floor with a big screen in it until I find Gabriel on his knees in front of the couch in what must be the television room. Carly is lying on the couch, panting through an open mouth. Her skin is blotchy and puffy, and the glands in her neck are swollen. The sight shocks me to a standstill, but Gabriel’s calm, strong voice commands me.

  “Give me the epinephrine auto-injector. It’s a yellow and white box.” He loosens his tie and pushes a cushion under Carly’s head.

  I find the box and hand it to him with shaky fingers. Contrary to my trembling hands, his are steady as he opens the box and retrieves the injector. He removes the gray cap and pushes the red tip against Carly’s thigh, then counts out loud to ten. When he’s done, he checks that the needle has extended and caps it with the protective cover. I’m a vet student, not a doctor, but I know what epinephrine is for, and I know a severe allergic reaction when I see one.

  There’s underlying panic in Gabriel’s steady voice. “The ambulance is on its way, honey.” “Allergy?” I force from a tight throat.

  The only answer I get is his cold, frightening glare. I want to ask what she’s allergic to, but the ringtone of a phone cuts me short. A mobile vibrates on the coffee table. Gabriel holds out his palm in silent instruction, his eyes back on his daughter.

  When I place the phone in his hand, he glances at the screen, and answers in a flat tone. “The ambulance is on its way.” His expression turns hard as he listens to a reply. “Yes, I take full responsibility if anything happens to her, and no, now’s not the time to threaten me with sole custody. Come over if you want to see for yourself how she is or wait for us at the hospital, but stop calling every two minutes. It’s not going to change a damn thing.” He cuts the call and dumps the phone on the couch.

  Before I can get my bearings, the doorbell rings. I run to get it, but the door opens to reveal one of the men from yesterday, the one who shot Puff. He leads two paramedics pushing a stretcher inside. A private ambulance is parked in the circular driveway.

  “Where?” one of the men asks tersely.

  “Follow me.”

  I lead them to the television room. The medics go inside and shut the door on me. Puff’s killer gives me a hard look before he exits the house. While I’m pacing the corridor, a modelpretty woman rounds the corner and stalks my way. Her blonde hair is twisted into a French roll. A white two-piece suit clings to her body, defining her curves. There’s a striking resemblance between her and Carly.

  “Where are they?” she asks with regal calmness.

  I indicate the door. “Through here.”

  She opens and slams the door, causing it to shake in the frame. Through the door, I hear the heated tones of an argument, but I can’t make out the words. Carly’s mom must live close by to be able to get here so fast.

  Not sure if I should wait or leave, I decide to stick around in case they need me. Why didn’t Carly call for me? Maybe she did, and I didn’t hear. It can’t be the cake. Carly would’ve told me if she’s allergic to eggs or honey. It can be a bee sting. The sliding doors to the pool deck are open.

  Seconds later, the paramedics exit, pushing Carly on the stretcher. Gabriel and the blonde woman walk next to the stretcher, Gabriel’s face tense.

  At the front door, the paramedics stop.

  “Only one of you can accompany us in the ambulance,” the older man says.

  “You go.” Gabriel drags a hand through his hair. “I’ll meet you at the hospital.”

  When Gabri
el’s guard helps the men to lift the stretcher down the stairs, the woman I presume to be Carly’s mom turns to Gabriel. “I expect you to deal with this.” “I will,” he says tightly.

  She looks down her nose at me before clacking a path down the stairs to the waiting ambulance. At the bottom, she throws her keys to Puff’s killer. “Rhett, bring my car to the hospital.”

  Rhett glances at Gabriel, who gives a small nod. Carly’s mom gets into the back of the ambulance, and the door is pulled closed from the inside. As the vehicle pulls off with blaring sirens, Rhett gets into a Mercedes sports model and follows.

  We are alone in the entrance now, Gabriel and I, and fury replaces the coldness in his eyes.

  “You have a lot to explain.”

  Panic speeds up my breathing. “What?”

  “The cake.”

  To say I’m shivering in my shoes is an understatement. “Oh, no, Gabriel.” This can’t be happening. “I’m so sorry.”

  His eyes drill into mine. “Why did you do it?”

  “I just wanted to make something nice for dessert.”

  “Nice could’ve gotten her killed. Or did you know all along? How did you find out?”

  “I swear I didn’t know. I still don’t know! Was it the honey? The eggs?”

  “Carly is allergic to coconut.”

  “What?” My mind is reeling. “She specifically asked for it.”

  He looks at me with an expression that stops my heart before sending it into overdrive, the beat pounding in my ears.

  “If you’re lying, you’ll pay dearly.” He grabs my arm with such a strong grip it hurts to the bone. “You don’t want to know what I do with people who threaten my family, let alone try to kill them.” He shakes me hard. “Next time, stick to what’s expected of you and leave the menu planning to Marie.” He shoves me away and takes his phone from his pocket.

  I’m hugging myself while he barks out a command into the phone.

  There’s a dark threat in his words. “Stay with Valentina until I return.” After putting away his phone, he hisses, “Be very glad she’s not dead and be even gladder Magda is at a dinner party tonight.”

  A guard comes jogging up the path, an automatic rifle in his hands.

  When he reaches the porch, Gabriel says, “Don’t let her out, and if Magda returns, don’t let her near Valentina.”

  The guard nods, taking up a position by the door.

  I try to calm my breathing as I meet Gabriel’s livid stare. He has all the reason in the world to be angry, and the fact that he doesn’t hit me makes me fear him more. It means he has control, and men with control are the most dangerous.

  “Go inside.” The words sound like an ice lake cracking. “Don’t even think about running.

  The windows and doors are protected with an alarm.”

  I bite my cheek to still my chattering teeth and do as I’ve been told. I’m scarcely inside when I hear the tires of a car shooting up gravel. Through the lounge window, I see a Jaguar convertible clear the gates.

  I’m shaking all over when I get to my room. Oscar is my consolation, offering me affection as I sink down on the bed and sit in the dark until my breathing is more normal. As the minutes roll into hours, I try to calm my mind by studying, but I can’t concentrate on what I read. One hour becomes two, then three, four, and five. I don’t have the courage to shower or change. All I can do is wait for Gabriel and Carly’s return. Not able to stand the tension any longer, I take up a post in front of the window in the dining room that overlooks the street-side of the property.

  It’s almost eleven before the headlights of a car illuminates the gates. It can be Magda, returning from her dinner party. Relief washes over me when the Jaguar pulls up to the door. A haggard-looking Gabriel gets out and limps around the car to help Carly from the passenger side.

  With his arm around her shoulders, he leads her up the steps. I rush to meet them in the entrance. “Carly! Are you all right?” “She will be,” Gabriel says, moving past me.

  “I kept the dinner warm.”

  “I’m not hungry,” Carly says.

  “You need your strength, honey. Bring it up to Carly’s room.”

  He doesn’t spare me a glance as they make their way upstairs. I prepare a tray and knock on Carly’s door before I enter.

  Gabriel sits in a chair next to the bed, Carly’s hand clasped in his. He turns his scars away from me. “Leave it on the table. We’ll serve ourselves.”

  I obey and escape to the false safety of my room. I’m petrified Gabriel won’t believe me, but even more terrified that my mistake will cost Charlie’s life. ‘One wrong move,’ Magda said. I don’t get why Carly would do something like this.

  For another hour, nothing happens. Eventually, my tiredness wins over my anxiety. I have a quick shower and get into bed.

  * * *

  Gabriel

  In the solitude of my study, I sit down at my desk to contemplate my options. It’s a difficult decision. I watched a playback of the security feed from the cameras in the kitchen. Carly’s voice was clear when she asked for a cake with coconut. Valentina told the truth. With a sigh I feel all the way to my bones, I pour a shot of whisky and down it in one go.

  I don’t understand my daughter. I failed her. There’s a gorge so wide between us I’m afraid

  I’ll never bridge it. When the crack started, I can’t say. Was it during Carly’s toddler years, when

  I was always absent from home, the family business taking up my days and nights? Is it because Sylvia and I couldn’t make things work? If I can pinpoint when it started, maybe I’ll find the reason. Carly and I both know there’s a problem. We don’t acknowledge it, because it’s easier to skip the drama. If I believed Carly has a better relationship with her mother, I’d encourage her to stay with Sylvia, but she’s old enough to choose, and the fact that she lives here tells me enough.

  Despite being scum, I try to be fair. It’s the only shred of humanity that stands between the man and the monster, but in my business, fair only applies to family. Putting any staff member above family, right or wrong, won’t be tolerated. Such an act could get said staff member killed. Innocent or not, actions have consequences, and Valentina can’t escape taking responsibility for hers. Sylvia expects me to inflict suitable retribution. She’s not going to forget or let it go. If I don’t do it before Magda comes home, Valentina will die for what happened tonight. I don’t feel like punishing Valentina for something Carly should pay for, but I don’t have a choice.

  I refill my glass and shoot back another shot before I pick up my phone and dial Rhett.

  “Come to my study,” I say when he answers.

  The fact that something ignites in me, making me hard, when I think about what I’m about to do is proof of how far gone I am. It could be that the alcohol is fuel on my rusty inhibitions.

  Maybe it’s heredity, and it’s in my genes. I’m not a made monster. I was born one.

  The door opens, and Rhett enters. “You called for me, boss?”

  “Take Valentina to the gym.”

  The twitch that wrings his lips into a smile makes me want to break his nose. I add it to the mistake he made of shooting the dog. Deep down, I know it’s not Rhett’s fault. He never expected me to let the Haynes’ live. He did what he believed was right, but he caused Valentina suffering, and he’ll have to pay. Lucky for him, he leaves without question. I could do with another drink, but I won’t risk it. I have to be sober. I’ll need utter control.

  The house is dark and quiet as I make my way downstairs to the basement. It’s a windowless room where my guards and I work out, but it also serves as interrogation room when the need arises. For this reason, it’s soundproof. Carly can never know what happens in the depths of the house when she’s fast asleep upstairs.

  Chapter Five

  Gabriel

  I flick on the lights and walk around the room, trying to still the upsurge of regret that’s not powerful enough to wash out my e
xcitement. The exercise mat absorbs my steps, not giving sound to the unequal harshness of my soles.

  Regret makes me weak. Excitement makes me cruel. Anger makes me dangerous. I assess my state carefully. Anger is not part of my repertoire tonight. That’s a good thing, or I wouldn’t be able to do this. It would be much too hazardous.

  Rhett enters the room with Valentina, his hand folded around her upper arm. She’s wearing her nightgown, which exposes her toned legs. Rhett’s fingers leave white indents on her skin. It shakes up all kinds of sentiments in me, but they’re like shredded pieces of paper. I can’t make sense of anything, except that I want to chop off his hand and poke out his eyes.

  With a flick of my head, I direct him to the back wall. He knows what to do. Her eyes hold mine as he drags her past. The quiet kind of anger I often recognize in myself makes the brown of her irises sizzle with sparks. Within seconds, Valentina is strung up by her arms on a rope knotted to her tied wrists, facing the wall.

  “Go,” I say to Rhett.

  He gives me a questioning look. The surprise and disappointment on his face threaten to unleash my rage. I’ve never dismissed him when punishment or interrogations are executed, but this isn’t a goddamn show for his entertainment. Rhett knows me well enough to read the signs. With a last, confused glance in Valentina’s direction, he walks from the room, shutting the door behind him.

  When there are just the two of us, I breathe easier. The violence dissipates. It becomes something different, something that turns my already erect cock into a raging hard steel rod. I adjust the rope, stretching it gently through the eye in the ceiling until she’s barely touching the mat with her toes, and secure the cord to the hook on the wall. I don’t want her to struggle or move. It’s safer this way.

  She peeks at me from over her shoulder, her eyes big and her cheeks pale. “What are you doing?”

  It’s not an easy question. There are many layers to it. I unbutton first one, then the other shirt cuff, rolling the sleeves back as I contemplate the answer. I don’t lie if I can prevent it. I decide to give her the simple truth.