Whatever It Takes: A Highland Springs Romance (Whatever Series Book 4)

by Leigh Fleming

  “Maybe it’s not too late for me.”

  Darla’s eyes stung with the thought she would soon meet her daughter—her daughter. She actually thought of Meghan as hers, but would Meghan come to think of her as Mom? Would she let her be a part of her life? Fear shivered down her spine. What if Jason had only found her because Meghan was sick? Had he told her everything? What if Meghan hated her for giving her up? They might not have searched for Darla if it weren’t for her illness. Could she blame them if they wouldn’t have? She never planned to look for her daughter and shouldn’t have expected them to be any different.

  Hours rolled by, blinded by the bright headlights of passing cars and mesmerized by the white lines on the highway. Darla practiced what she would say to Meghan when she woke up. She hadn’t given her up because of anything she had done wrong. She was a little baby who needed a mature adult to raise her. Yes, she had tried to forget her baby and think of her only as an object, but if Darla was honest with herself, she had thought about her little girl every day since giving birth, wondering what her life was like, whether she was she happy, healthy, and loved. Those moments when she allowed herself to dream she craved her little baby and wished she had held her before letting her go.

  The loud blast from a car’s horn made Darla swerve. She had drifted into the passing lane, so caught up in her thoughts of meeting her daughter. If she didn’t stay focused, she’d end up in a wreck and might not get the chance.

  An hour later, Darla walked down the dimly lit hallway, passing rooms of sleeping patients. Visiting hours were over, but she had received special permission to go to Meghan’s room. The door was ajar when she arrived, so she took a moment to take a deep breath and say a brief prayer. She pushed open the door and found Jason dozing in the chair beside her bed. Rather than wake him, she tiptoed around the other side of the bed and looked down at her daughter. If it weren’t for the machines and IVs, one would never know anything was wrong.

  Meghan’s long, dark hair fanned out over her shoulders, and her thick lashes feathered her high cheekbones. She was pale, making the smattering of freckles stand out across her nose. Her lips were full and pink, her hands were long-fingered, and she had a mole on her neck in the exact spot as Darla. This was her baby, all grown up, and looking so much like her. There wasn’t a trace of Clyde Fletcher—thank God.

  Darla collapsed in a nearby chair and buried her face in her hands, muffling the sobs that racked her body. How could this be happening? How could her baby be sick, perhaps dying, before they got the chance to know one another? She had so much to tell her, so much to explain. She couldn’t lose her now, she just couldn’t. Meghan had to know that it was out of love she had given her up. She may have been unplanned, but she wasn’t unloved.

  A strong set of hands squeezed her shoulders, and she glanced behind her to find Jason. She hadn’t heard him get up from his chair. He pulled some tissues from the box on the side table and handed them to her.

  “Come out in the hall with me,” he said as he held her arm, lifting her to her feet.

  Darla followed him into the empty hallway and glanced up through watery eyes at the tears forming in his. If she was this heartbroken, how must he feel? He blinked a couple of times, and Darla couldn’t take it another minute. She reached up and wrapped her arms around his neck, cupping the back of his head and pulling him down. He leaned into her embrace and cried so hard, both their bodies shook. She had only just met this man—they were practically strangers—but it felt like she’d known him forever as they shared in each other’s grief.

  “She’ll be okay. We’ll find a way,” she said.

  Jason finally pulled back, covered his eyes with his hands, and turned his back to Darla. “I’m sorry.” His voice was thick with emotion.

  “It’s okay. You’ve probably held it in way too long.” She handed him a few dry tissues over his shoulder. “Here, now it’s my turn.”

  They shared a laugh, his face red with embarrassment as he turned to face her. “It just kills me to see her like that.”

  “How many times has it been? That she’s been here?”

  “This is the fourth time in as many months. I’m not sure how many more times she…” He glanced off toward Meghan’s room.

  “Hey…” She laid her hand on his arm. “We’re going to find an answer. We’ll find a specialist.”

  “Who? Where?”

  “We won’t stop until we find the best doctor in the country—the world. We’re going to get our daughter well again, do you hear me?”

  “Our daughter?”

  She dropped her hold on him and took a step away. “I’m sorry.” It had slipped out before she realized what she was saying. “I shouldn’t have said that. She’s your daughter.” He grabbed her hands and pulled her toward him.

  “Let’s not argue over semantics. You’re here. Meghan needs you.” Jason brushed Darla’s damp cheek with the back of his hand. “And I’m glad you’re here.”

  EIGHT

  Darla awoke alone in the waiting room to the sound of metal carts, clicking down the hallway, and the smell of food and coffee. Her dry eyes burned as she slowly opened them to the bright, fluorescent lights overhead. She rubbed the stiffness from her neck as she fumbled in her purse in search of her glasses. What time was it and where was Jason? They had talked long into the night in the waiting area down the hall from Meghan’s room, filling each other in on the last eighteen years.

  “Jenny and I dated all through high school and got married when we were twenty. Too young. Neither of us had even finished college.” Jason had rested his elbows on his knees, rubbing his thumb over the finger that once held a wedding band as he recalled his failed marriage. “We had broken up and got back together so many times, we thought getting married would keep us together.”

  “I guess that didn’t work?” Darla sat beside him with her hands gripping the arms of the chair.

  “Guess not. She dropped out of school to help support us and wanted a baby right away. I tried to talk her out of it, but she was hell-bent on getting pregnant. After a year without a baby, she got tested and found out she couldn’t conceive—some abnormality.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  “She wanted a baby so badly, she immediately looked into adopting. Her dad knew a guy on the board of Catholic Charities, and they made an exception for our age. They moved us to the top of the waiting list for available babies.”

  “How old were you when you adopted Meghan?”

  “We were twenty-four. I’d been working at a bank for a couple of years and just started graduate school. We hadn’t even bought a house yet, but I couldn’t slow her down. She wanted a baby, and that was all there was to it.”

  “So what happened?”

  He leaned back in his chair and winced at the memory. “They found us Meghan. We brought her home when she was just five days old. I thought Jenny would finally be happy, but she wasn’t. She complained about being tired, that the baby cried too much, her arms hurt from holding her—you name it. Jenny did nothing but whine from the time Meghan came home. It made no sense.”

  Darla crossed her arms and closed her eyes, holding back a scream. How could a woman who wanted a baby so badly act that way? It broke her heart to know Meghan hadn’t been received by a loving mother.

  “We fought all the time. She just never bonded with Meghan. If it weren’t for my mom stepping in to help while I was at work, I don’t know what kind of care she would’ve received. Honestly, sometimes I was afraid to leave her alone with Jenny.”

  “Please tell me she didn’t hurt her.” Darla gripped his arm, as panic pressed heavy on her chest.

  “No, she didn’t. I’m sure of it.” He sighed as he placed his hand on Darla’s. “I would’ve never let her hurt the baby, not physically, but I’m sure her leaving has hurt Meghan at some level.” Her breath hitched as his beautiful, blue eyes met hers. “I loved her the minute I held her. I didn’t want a baby yet, but from the moment I laid
eyes on her, she was mine.”

  “You have no idea what that means to me to hear you say that.”

  “I was grateful Jenny left when she did. At least Meghan has no memory of her and had formed no attachment.”

  “You said she left when Meghan was one?”

  “Right before her first birthday. Mom called me after I got to work one morning and said when she got to our apartment, Meghan was asleep in her crib and Jenny was gone. She left me a note saying she couldn’t be a mother or a wife right now.”

  “Oh my God, did you have any warning?”

  “No, other than I knew she wasn’t happy. A few months later, I was served with divorce papers. She gave up her parental rights, giving me full custody of Meghan, and I haven’t heard from her since.”

  “You have no idea where she is?”

  “Last I heard, she was living in Nevada somewhere. I haven’t really made an attempt to find her.”

  “Oh, Jason.” She shifted in her seat and took his hand between hers. “You’ve had it rough, raising Meghan alone, but she’s so lucky to have you.”

  “No, I’m lucky to have her.”

  Their gazes locked and he pulled his hand from between hers, brushing her hair off her shoulder. Darla’s breath hitched as he leaned in as if he wanted to kiss her. They hardly knew each other, but from the moment she met him, she felt a magnetic connection. She was disappointed when he pulled back, thinking better of it. Clearing his throat, he’d perched his elbows on his knees again. “So what about you? Want to tell me how you ended up pregnant at fifteen?”

  Did she really have to tell him the horrifying details? It was humiliating enough to have a baby at such a young age.

  “It’s a long, awful story that I’d rather not—”

  “We have all night.”

  “The thing is—”

  “Was he your boyfriend?”

  “No. He was older.”

  “How much older?”

  Darla had jumped from her chair and rushed across the waiting room to the large picture window. She hugged her arms around herself, hoping to settle the nerves racking her body. She’d spent so many years trying to forget those horrible months, praying she’d never have to relive them. What would he think of her if he knew the truth?

  “Darla.” She jumped when he placed his hands on her shoulders, and his warm breath tickled her ear. “I won’t press you. I’d like to know what happened, but obviously, you’re not ready to tell me.”

  When she turned around, he stepped back, dropping his hands, but she desperately wanted his touch. They were making a good connection—something she’d never felt with another man—and she didn’t want to jeopardize it by telling him her story. She grabbed his hand before he could walk away.

  “The thing is…” She tugged him around to face her, and he took her other hand in his. “I just don’t want Meghan to know. It’s bad enough that she was given up for adoption and Jenny left her, but for her to know the circumstances of her conception. Well…”

  “I won’t tell her. Only you can share the story.”

  “I don’t want you to think less of me.”

  “You were fifteen. We all did stupid things when we were that age.”

  “No, you didn’t. Not like this.”

  They’d been interrupted by a nurse who gave them an update on Meghan’s condition—unchanged. Jason had left the waiting room, seeming to need solitude, leaving Darla alone to battle her demons.

  Now, still surprised at how close she’d come to revealing her story, she slipped the tortoiseshell frames on her face and the hospital’s morning activities came into view. Patients were receiving their breakfast trays, and her stomach growled in response. Her mouth was dry, her neck was killing her, and she desperately needed to find a mirror. Jason couldn’t see her like this. He’d been so kind to her last night, not pressuring her to share her story. His opinion of her mattered.

  She rushed down the hall to the ladies’ room and caught her reflection in the mirror. The mascara smudges under her eyes made her look like a raccoon, and her matted hair would make a fine bird’s nest. She belonged in a forest rather than a hospital. Running her brush through her hair and popping a mint in her mouth, she touched up what little makeup was left on her face and left the restroom, ready to find Jason. He met her halfway to Meghan’s room, a little sleep deprived, but still so handsome.

  “There you are. Meghan’s awake. She regained consciousness a little while ago. Ready to go in?”

  “I’m not sure. I wish I could get a shower, change into something else, touch up—”

  “You look lovely.”

  Warmth spread from her heart to her head. He just called her lovely. What a sweet thing to say.

  “Come on, Meghan’s been asking for you.” Or was he just saying it to move her along to Meghan’s room?

  “How did she know I was here?”

  “I told her this morning when she woke up. She’s concerned about her appearance—like mother, like daughter.”

  “Oh that’s silly.”

  “Exactly.” His smile melted her heart and boosted her confidence. She was about to meet her daughter. What would she feel when they met? Could they form a bond after so many years? She prayed that after Meghan’s curiosity had been satisfied, she’d want to get to know her better. She wasn’t sure she could handle a rejection. She stopped in the middle of the hallway when panic took over her body.

  “Darla? What’s wrong?”

  Not far from the door, she whispered, “What if she doesn’t like me? What if after we get to know each other, she has no interest in pursuing a relationship? What if…”

  He held her shoulders in his hands and dipped down to her eye level. “She’s wanted to meet you for years. She’ll like you as much as…” He cleared his throat and looked away but kept a firm grip on her shoulders. “She wants to spend time with you, get to know you. Don’t worry, it’ll be fine.”

  “I’m afraid. What if she’s angry?”

  “There’s only one way to find out.” He wrapped an arm around her shoulder and led her into the hospital room. Unlike last night, Meghan was sitting up in bed without the oxygen mask, holding a piece of toast in her hand. She dropped it on the plate as they walked in.

  “Hi,” Meghan said as a smile spread across her face. Darla stumbled back against Jason’s arm. If he hadn’t been there, she may have dropped to the floor. She had looked so much like Meghan at that age; it was like seeing her own reflection. She could barely get the words out from the emotion clogging her throat.

  “Oh, look at you.” Darla rushed across the room, leaving Jason standing in the doorway, and gathered her daughter in her arms. Her bony spine poked through the thin hospital gown—she was much thinner than Darla had been at eighteen. She held her so tight, she was afraid she’d break her. Slowly, she eased back and captured Meghan’s face in her hands. “You’re so pretty.”

  “Thanks.”

  “I thought we’d never meet.”

  “I knew we would.”

  Shock vibrated through her limbs and tears flooded her eyes. She had done everything she could to forget her child, but Meghan had never forgotten her. Guilt and shame swallowed her as she dropped to the chair beside the bed, burying her face in her hands.

  “Dad?” Darla barely heard her daughter’s voice through her tears.

  “It’s okay, Meggy. Darla just needs a minute.” He stuffed a handkerchief in Darla’s hand and rubbed his hand over her back. “She does this a lot.”

  She fell back against the chair and burst out laughing. What a sight she must be. Meghan will think she’s crazy, crying one minute and laughing like a fool the next. “I’m sorry,” Darla managed to say through her tear-stained laughter. She blew her nose, wiped her eyes, and took another look at the beautiful young lady she had created.

  “I’m just overwhelmed, that’s all.”

  “You’ll get used to it, Meg. I have.” Jason chuckled and gave her neck a tender
squeeze before he went around to the other side of the bed.

  “Oh, don’t listen to him.” Darla waved the hanky at him. “I’m not usually this emotional.”

  “So she says,” Jason said, peeling the lid off a cup of orange juice on the breakfast cart. “She’s cried at least once every day since we met.”

  “It’s all your fault.” She caught Meghan glancing back and forth between the two of them with a curious look in her eyes. “I’m sorry, Meghan. I just fell apart when I saw you. It’s the first time I’ve ever seen you, except for last night and the pictures your dad showed me.”

  “And the day I was born.”

  “Well, actually, no. I didn’t see you the day you were born.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “I…well, I…”

  Jason stepped in when he sensed her distress. “Better eat up and gain back your strength.” He handed her the juice, and she drank it without protest. “Finish up your eggs before they come take the tray away.”

  “But I want to hear about the day I was born.”

  “Maybe it’s best if you wait a little. You’ve been through a lot the past twenty-four hours and just met Darla. Wouldn’t you like to get to know one another first?”

  “Dad.” Meghan’s brows drew together, and Jason surrendered to her plea.

  “Fine. I’ll leave you two alone.” He kissed Meghan on the forehead and pointed at Darla. “You, no more tears.” He smiled as he circled the bed. “And make sure she eats every bite.”

  “I’ll do my best.” Darla’s gaze followed Jason from the room, and she drew in a breath as she turned back to Meghan. She stood up and leaned against the metal guardrail. “You better eat if you don’t want to get me in trouble.”

  “I’ll make a deal with you. You answer all my questions, and I’ll clean my plate.”

  So her daughter was a master negotiator. She must have inherited that trait from her.

  “Deal. What do you want to know?” The bed rail provided necessary support as her knees threatened to give out.