Kit: Carson Brothers #1

by Dyble, S R

  I was pregnant with Kit’s child and if that wasn’t enough, being around him hurt with every shred of my soul and now seeing him flirting with another girl hurt like nothing I’d ever experienced. Just as Chris turned back to face the class, I rushed past him with my bag firmly over my shoulder and I stared at the floor as I felt tears threatening my eyes.

  I wasn’t going to cry, I wasn’t going to give him that. I was going to go home and cry there like a big girl. When I heard fast footsteps behind me followed by the commotion in the class, I knew Kit was following me and I picked up my pace to avoid being the talk of the class.

  “Eve!” he called after me but I wasn’t going to let him see me, because my hormones had gotten the better of me and I felt the one tear rushing down my face. I quickly swiped it away and headed for the stairs when I felt Kit grab hold of my hand and he turned me around so he could stare me straight in the face.

  “Get off me,” I said, trying to pull my arm back.

  “Is everything okay?” We both heard Chris and I saw Kit’s eyes darken with a form of anger I’d never seen before.

  Without looking around or taking his eyes off of me, he bit his teeth together and said, “We’re fine."

  “Eves?” Chris asked after me and it made me close my eyes with regret because I wanted him to leave just as badly as Kit did.

  “What the hell do you think I am, man?” Kit turned quickly and faced up to Chris.

  “She deserves so much better than you.” Chris threw back at him and it made me shoot forward and stand between the two of them.

  “You think I don’t know that, you fucking prick?” Kit said back to Chris, only this time he couldn’t get closer because I stood between them both and placed my hand on Kit’s chest. The touch alone made me look up into his eyes because it sent a wave of longing over my body and I knew Kit had felt it too. He looked down at me and into my eyes and his face settled, almost, as if he was in that moment with me. I made sure to break the connection quickly and I looked away.

  “Chris, please go,” I said, looking around.

  “You need to get away from him, Eve."

  “I swear to God, Chris.” Kit warned and I felt him pushing against my hand.

  “She’s my student, I won’t have you harassing her.” Chris sounded like an actual teacher for once but neither one of us bought his bullshit.

  “Really? So, it has nothing to do with you wanting into my girl’s pants?”

  Before I could answer he jumped back in. “She’s not your girl anymore."

  I felt Kit move quicker than I could have anticipated and in a very skilled way, he managed to scoop me to a side without hurting me. I yelled at him to stop as I turned around and saw him pinning Chris to the wall like he was about to strangle him.

  “You fucking dare come near what’s mine and I swear to God I’ll fucking kill you!” Kit was like I’d never seen him before and as I stared at him and Chris within Kit’s red knuckles, I saw a part of the man that I’m sure had come from somewhere in his past. He looked scary, and although I knew he’d never hurt me, I feared for Chris at that moment.

  “Kit!” I screamed at him, knowing full well that If I didn’t do something fast then he was likely to do something crazy.

  Kit looked at me, still like a crazed man and it wasn’t until he saw me crying that his hands loosened around Chris’s collar and I made quick work of wiping away each tear but more just kept coming.

  I was surprised that the commotion hadn’t brought the class from their seats but we were around the corner and past a set of doors and I was thankful for it.

  “Stop,” I said simply and it was as if I’d got past his wall of fury and he looked back at Chris who was now gripping at Kit’s hands, trying to loosen them from around his collar.

  Kit let go of Chris then and took a step back as if he couldn’t believe what he had almost done.

  “Chris, please, just leave,” I said as he eyed Kit up and down.

  I’d give him one thing, he wasn’t prepared to back down even if Kit did have the upper hand.

  Chris stared at me and I could see in his eyes that he thought I wasn’t worth it, and he was right.

  He left then and I closed my eyes, trying to gather myself after the adrenaline had just spiked my hormones to the max.

  “I’m sorry,” I heard Kit say as I stared at the floor and as he neared me, I looked up at him, knowing I had to tell him.

  “I’m not yours, Kit,” I told him, staring him in the eyes.

  He shook his head in total denial. “You are."

  It made me shake my head and I started to cry again.

  “What If I’m pregnant?” I blurted out.

  It was pure word vomit and it hit Kit like it too, the pure shock coated his face as I continued what I had to say.

  “Will I be yours then?” I questioned him with my face serious, but I got nothing in return.

  Kit just stared at me like I’d smacked him with my words and it hurt so bad to not know what he was thinking. It terrified me and I didn’t know what to do so I did the only thing I knew how to.

  I ran.

  I turned around and full on pelted it down the steps and outside.

  I gulped in mouthfuls of air as I ran faster around the side of the building until I could run no further. I brought my hands to my knees and wheezed in air as I bent over and cried.

  Thankfully the street was empty, which meant my dramatic scene couldn’t be seen by passers-by and I was about to pull myself together when I heard Kit roaring my name.

  Oh no.

  Did I run more or face him?

  Remembering his face moments earlier, I decided I wasn’t ready to face him again today and as I settled on the fact that I was about to run, then I felt his arms wrapping around me and I yelled for him to let me go.

  “Stop running from me!” Kit ordered but it was no use. I fought him with everything I had until Kit pushed me against the wall so I was encased there.

  “Stop it, Eve!” He turned me around so that I was facing him and he gripped hold of each side of my face between his hands so that I was looking at him.

  “Stop it,” he said more calmly as I still fought against him, but it was useless. Kit had his body pressed against mine which meant I was encased between him and the wall behind me.

  “You’ll hurt the baby, calm down,” he said more calmly.

  Hearing him referring to the baby made me stare at him.

  “Don’t act like you give a damn about the baby,” I bit back, trying to move his hands away from my face.

  He didn’t let my face go though, instead, he brought his forehead to mine and closed his eyes.

  “I’m so sorry,” he said then and it brought tears back to my eyes.

  “Don’t you dare say sorry for my baby, don’t you dare say it like they’re a mistake."

  Kit opened his eyes then and moved his head back so he could look me in the eyes.

  “I’m sorry for everything, Eves, I’m not saying sorry for the baby we’ve created."

  I didn’t know if I should have believed him or not, but I had nothing to say to it and silence lingered as Kit used his thumbs to remove the tears from beneath my eyes.

  “We need to talk,” he said then.

  I just shook my head, but it was purely because I was in the frame of mind to fight him on everything. I couldn’t trust Kit, even though everything was yelling at me to. It didn’t make any sense to me.

  “I deserve that much,” he said more seriously and it made me glare at him.

  “You don’t deserve shit."

  “Eve, forget about everything between us for five minutes. You’ve just told me you’re pregnant, I deserve the time to talk to you about it. Are you going to give me that?”

  Kit was staring me in the eyes.

  He may not have deserved it, but my baby did. And I agreed at that moment for my baby’s sake because I wanted their father to be in their life.

  I nodded and clos
ed my eyes before looking back at him.

  “Good, my car’s parked over there."

  I didn’t look at where Kit was pointing, because I already knew where he’d parked his car. It was always in the same place and I headed that way without waiting for Kit to follow me.

  We were silent in the car, totally silent. Not a word was spoken and I dared to glance over at Kit who was staring at the road but his fists were clenched tightly around the steering wheel and he looked lost in thought. I knew it was because of the news he’d received, he was in complete shock.

  I allowed the silence to linger all the way to Kit’s bedroom where I sat on his bed and watched as he stalked about the room and disappeared into the bathroom.

  The intense anxiety I felt was unreal, even after losing my parents and having anxiety attacks constantly. I’d never been so nervous in all of my life and it wasn’t helping that I felt sick to my stomach. It was an early pregnancy symptom that I was still getting used to.

  Holding my hand to my throat I stood up, feeling the familiar sensation building in my throat before I was about to be sick. Sometimes it would pass and I prayed that today was one of those days but as Kit came back from the bathroom and looked at me he knew as well as I did that this wasn’t going to pass and I rushed past him and fell to my knees in front of the toilet before throwing up.

  I wafted my arm in the air and told Kit to leave me alone, I didn’t want him to see me being sick.

  “The fuck am I going away,” I heard him say back and shortly after Kit scooped all of my hair out of my face and held it up whilst I gagged some more.

  “When did you last eat?”

  I shook my head because I really didn’t want to talk.

  “Eve, when did you last eat?”

  “This morning!” I yelled at him, hoping to God he’d leave me alone and that the convulsions in my throat would go away.

  “What did you have?”

  “What are you, my frikkin’ dietitian!”

  “Eve, for God’s sake.” He was losing patience with me so I gave in.

  “A slice of toast, I haven’t had an appetite, okay?”

  “You’ve had a slice of toast all day?”

  I shook my head and got up after the sickness ended and made my way to the sink where Kit filled a cup of water and handed it to me.

  “You need to be eating regularly, you’re eating something, now,” he said and watched as I downed the full glass of water.

  I didn’t get a chance to shake my head because Kit got hold of my hand and took me downstairs with him before I could object.

  “Oh, hey cutie,” Jax greeted me as if he couldn’t believe I was here. Had Kit told him everything? It made me wonder then who all of Kit’s brothers were, did they all know about my dad and what Kit was doing whilst I sat here with them? Kit left me beside the kitchen island and headed to the fridge.

  I gave Jax a small smile as he eyed me and Kit’s back. Kit was on a mission and didn't even register his brother.

  Jax finished his coffee then and placed his mug in the sink just as Kit came back to the counter with a sandwich on a plate.

  “I’ve gotta go to work, see you both later,” Jax said and I turned to say bye before eyeing Kit and the plate of food he was expecting me to eat.

  “Eat,” he said, resting against the counter.

  I shook my head, feeling queasy just looking at the sandwich.

  “Jesus, Eve, please eat."

  I stared at him, wondering if I dared deny him again.

  “You need to eat,” Kit then said, looking at my stomach and I knew he meant for the baby’s sake. He was right and I stared at him as he looked at my stomach, wondering if he genuinely cared for this baby.

  “I can’t eat whilst you’re staring at me,” I said as I took a seat at the kitchen counter.

  He nodded and turned around to make a drink, and instead of staring at me he stared at the wall with a drink in his hand.

  My mind was running as I ate the sandwich Kit had made me.

  I couldn’t believe I was back in his house after everything had gone on and as I stared at the back of his head, I thought about how he knew my dad and everything we’d been through. As much as I wanted to talk out my baby’s future out with him, I wasn’t sure I was ready. I was falling apart in his company and having to force down a sandwich wasn’t helping.

  “You want another?” Kit asked as he turned to see I’d finished the sandwich.

  I shook my head and brushed the crumbs off of my hands onto the plate.

  “I think I need to go home,” I said honestly, I wasn’t strong enough to deal with this yet.

  Shaking his head Kit rounded the counter and turned me on the swivel chair I was on so that I was facing him.

  “You can’t, we need to talk.”

  Kit was far too close and I had to push him back. I hated the way it made him look at me but I had to remember that despite being pregnant, Kit wasn’t someone I could get close to again. When the time was right, I would have to face him to talk over our baby but for now, I needed to be away from him because this was too painful.

  “I don’t need to do anything, I need more time…” was all I said before I got up and headed for the door.

  “Eve, no.” Kit came around me and stood in front of me as I panicked.

  “Kit, get out of my way!” I ordered but he wasn’t going to move.

  “Will you stop acting crazy and just talk to me?”

  Calling me crazy made me see red and I glared at him as we both heard someone coming down the stairs.

  “Dude, never call an angry woman crazy.” Jason offered some brotherly advice which made Kit hiss.

  “Shut up!”

  With his hands in the air and smiling, Jason headed to the kitchen as Kit stared at me.

  “Eve, baby, please,” he begged and I had to look away from his face.

  A face like that was my undoing and it was precisely the reason why I had to get away from Kit. I had to become stronger if I was going to stay away from him.

  “You’ve got five minutes, then I need to leave,” I said, giving in.

  He nodded “I’ll take anything right now."

  I let him lead the way to his room where it’d be private and away from his brothers’ listening ears.

  Each step Kit looked around to make sure I was still behind him, I think he thought I was going to make a run for it whilst he wasn’t looking and I felt guilty for it.

  I took my original seat on Kit’s bed and watched as he closed the door and approached me.

  “I’m keeping it, Kit,” I told him straight out. “I’m keeping the baby."

  “Good,” he answered quickly.

  “Good?”

  I wasn’t sure I was expecting such a straight answer.

  “You think I’d want you to abort our baby?” He stared down at me as if he couldn’t believe that I’d ever think that way.

  “Let’s be honest, I don’t really know you at all, do I?” I looked away from him, afraid of crying again.

  When I looked back at him, I saw his face was set deadly serious and he continued staring at me.

  “You got the real me, Eves. Everything that happened with us was me, it was genuine."

  “I can’t believe a word you say,” I concluded, looking away but Kit knelt in front of me so that he could see my face.

  “Yes, you can."

  I had to stop staring at him, I knew if I stared at him too long that I’d end up believing him.

  “I was sent to protect you, Eves, to get close to you. I never planned on falling for you."

  I shook my head and tried to get up but Kit got up and held me there.

  “Don’t push me away, Eves, I love you."

  Again, I shook my head as tears threatened once again.

  “Stop,” I begged him, it was too much and I was about to cry when Kit pulled me towards him and to my shock captured my lips with his.

  It was a pure moment of weakness on m
y part and for the second that our lips met I wholeheartedly loved every second of feeling his soft lips against mine but so much hurt and hatred brought me back to reality and I unlatched my lips from his and pushed him back, only for Kit to grab both of my hands so I couldn’t fight him.

  “I love you,” he said again as I got so frustrated and started crying.

  “Yeah?” I stared directly at him. “And what about my baby? Will you love them?”

  “Our baby,” he corrected me and stared me down so that I knew it.

  “You’ve gotta let this sink in, Eve,” he said after a moment of silence.

  “I’ve only just been told I’m gonna be a daddy, I didn’t plan on having kids for years, if at all."

  “You’re not expected-”

  “Stop,” he cut me off.

  “I never planned on having kids, but the prospect of having them with you makes it all different. I want that with you, even if it’s a lot sooner than planned."

  “You want this?” I asked after letting it sink in.

  “I want you. I’m not losing you so forget it. We created a baby and as terrified as I may be, I’m still here, I’m not going anywhere."

  Without even meaning to I was crying again like a damn tap stuck on go.

  “Stop pushing me away,” he said quietly and I shook my head in anger.

  “Don’t tell me not to push you away. You broke my fucking heart! You promised me you wouldn’t hurt me. You sat with me talking about my dead parents and the whole time you knew him and what happened!”

  It was all too much, I’d gotten what I needed from Kit. I’d told him about me being pregnant and I’d gathered that he wanted our baby but that’s all I could handle. It was too much to do this with Kit and I broke free from his hands and headed for the door only for him to encase me there.

  I sobbed harder as I told him to let me go. I pulled at the door handle and cried more but it was no use. Kit had it pushed shut and in one swift move he turned me around and captured me against it.

  “I love you so much, Eves,” he said against my neck as he buried his face there. It was as if he was begging for me to stay, to give him another chance.