Darkened Soul (When Watchers Fall)

by C. G. Blaine

  I take it and am about to close my eyes.

  “Hold the fuck on.” He turns and yanks Hannah toward him, his mouth colliding with hers.

  Rosdan sighs from beside me. “Jesus Christ.”

  When they break apart, Cass shrugs. “You’re still better than the light.”

  She laughs, and he holds his arms out.

  “Let me have it,” he says to me.

  I’ve only sensed his light once, but I locate it rather quickly. I reverse the process, giving him back his divinity, and his palms spark.

  He smiles, and I think I’ve finally redeemed myself.

  “You ready?” he asks Rosdan.

  Rosdan snorts. “To ruin Abaddon’s day? Always.”

  Cass drops Hannah across the hall with the twins, and I tighten my hold on the Dimming Blade. “Will I be able to get to Chaz if he’s already in the cage?”

  Rosdan quits inspecting the already-fading scar on his side. “You’re not coming with, Nyx. We’ll get him and bring him back here.”

  I open my mouth to argue, but Cass reappears.

  “I’ve got Chaz’s blood at my apartment. We can figure out where he is from there.”

  “But—”

  Rosdan cuts me off with a shake of his head. One I’ve gotten before from Chaz, and I know I’ll have the same results, so I don’t bother trying.

  “Don’t forget the blocker bag when we leave,” Rosdan says, and I nod, heading toward the kitchen.

  But when they disappear from the living room, I stop.

  I wait a few seconds to make sure they aren’t coming back before I grab my phone from the table. With the blade in one hand, I scroll through my contacts until I reach NEVER ANSWER.

  And I’m not going to, but I will call.

  “About damn time, love,” Hex says when he picks up. “Finally come to your senses?”

  “Can a demon track another demon?” I ask, unsurprised that he clearly already had my number. “Say I needed to find Abaddon, would any asshole Upper be able to help me?”

  A deep sigh comes through the speaker. “Under normal circumstances, no. But this one might have a few tricks up his sleeve.”

  “And can you find me?”

  The question barely finishes before he appears, stepping through a portal in front of me.

  He holds the phone away from his ear and smirks, spotting the active blade and then looking up. “We’re going to save your dark angel then?”

  Ten minutes. The demons chill on the cliff for ten damn minutes without moving a muscle. If not for the Uppers, Abaddon and I would have portaled out and continued our conversation elsewhere, but they would only track us. So, we enter into one of those notorious demon standoffs. Each side waiting to see who can last longer. It’s almost as if they were compensating for something.

  Finally, our friends teleport into a loose formation in front of us.

  Abaddon’s already shuffled against the boulder when he hisses out a command. “Get him to the cage.”

  When the three Lowers move toward me, I bring the amulet out from my pocket. It still emits light as I hook it around my neck, sending them retreating. Abaddon realizes my smuggling scheme, and more of him than usual beams red. We don’t get a chance to talk it out before the opposing team launches the first round of fireballs. Whether we like it or not, Abaddon and I are each other’s only option for survival at this point.

  “Stay behind me, facing the other way,” I tell him, stuffing the necklace down the collar of my shirt.

  Surprisingly, he listens and then spouts an order of his own. “Keep inside the ring.”

  Before I ask, he blinks to the side of the boulder. He takes a knee, lowering the blue flame in his hand, and the ground ignites on contact. It races away from him and curves to form a massive circle around us, burning demons on its trip to the other side of the boulder, where it stops.

  The fucking theatrics never end with him, but at least this one benefits me.

  All the demons fit inside the ring with us. After the initial shock wears off, the unburned Lowers resume their sad attempts at an organized attack. I easily teleport out of the way of one fireball and duck to miss another. The amulet roars to life, crackling around my neck. With the crystal against my chest, the light surges down my arm, and a bolt shoots out of my hand. God, I’ve missed that. The demon I aimed at crashes into another one, and it strikes them both.

  Even with close to forty of them, I fall into a rhythm, anticipating their repetitive moves—pitch a fireball, teleport here. Fireball, teleport back. At this point, I could lob light over my shoulder and still land it. If threatened, they scramble or misfire at each other, doing the job for me.

  “No strategy.” I catch one with a streak of light, careening him into a group. “This is why you guys never win.”

  Abaddon snarls behind me. “We are at a slight disadvantage, given you can’t die. Well, you couldn’t,” he adds, a whole lot of smugness to his tone, considering he’s fighting for his own life right now.

  I alternate between shadows and light, slowly making headway. The farther back in the line we get, the smarter they are, and keeping up becomes a little more of a challenge. When I glance over my shoulder, Abaddon’s drifted across the circle from me.

  “Donny, what the—”

  He zeroes in on something behind me, and I jerk around to Braxis barreling toward me. Divine light strikes the Upper square in the chest, flinging him in the opposite direction. Except the light wasn’t from me, and it sure as hell wasn’t from Donny.

  I smile, even before lightning flashes overhead—twice—and then my bright-as-fuck brothers dive down, white wings spread. Their impact blows back a cluster of Lowers. They fold in their wings and drop, one appearing on each side of me.

  “Screw you,” Cass says, raising his glowing palms. “Leaving me more Nephilim.”

  Rosdan brings his up as well. “You’re officially prohibited from making fucking plans from here on out.”

  “Not like you followed it anyway,” I shoot back.

  We all arc bolts at the frontline of demons before Cass tilts his head toward me and cocks an eyebrow. “The hell we didn’t.”

  The fuck they did. Unless…

  I aim my shocked-as-hell look at Rosdan, but before he can confirm, Abaddon teleports in behind me. Not wanting to spoil the surprise, Ros only gives a slight nod. They’ve figured out how to reverse the blade. I’ll have my light again. Although the immense relief coursing through me has less to do with what I’ll get back than what I won’t have to lose.

  “Why are they retreating?” Abaddon hisses.

  The Lowers are falling back to the fiery edge with Braxis and Zagan. Tension floats between the four of us while we try to figure out the play. I see it first and point to a spot near the Uppers.

  “There,” I say.

  An open portal, just inside the flames.

  “Another one.” Rosdan juts his chin to the opposite side of them, the air rippling from more than heat.

  Abaddon curses and adds five feet of space between us and him. “They’re trading out.”

  As he finishes, Lowers begin filing into the second portal, and new ones funnel out of the other one. They’re switching the injured for fresh ones, and Cass groans as they advance.

  Zagan leads the charge this time. He blinks in front of us, his army of dark following him. Rosdan and Cass meet them head-on while I hit the periphery. So much of the Lowers’ defense relies on sensing divinity that I skirt the edges nearly undetected until the crystal kicks on, and by then, I’ve already struck. My brothers and I fight the way we have since our beginning. We know each other’s moves and seamlessly assist in banishing darkness.

  As we’re warring our way through the horde of rats, Braxis targets Abaddon. I teleport to Donny, grabbing him by the collar to bring him back over with us, but he shoves me off. Rather than bother with saving his life—which goes against everything I stand for anyway—I move to what’s threatening him. />
  Once I pop up in front of Braxis, the amulet discharges stronger than ever. The energy and heat surge from my palms and trap the Upper in divinity, not giving him a chance to escape. His black pupils spread while the darkness searches for a reprieve. With all the power coursing through me, the static is almost more than my own shadows can bear.

  Finally, I have to teleport away, so I can breathe. And then Rosdan drops to where I was with Cass right behind him, both of them clasping on to Braxis’s already-wilting shoulders. They bombard the demon with light, and in only a few seconds, his head tips back, and the darkness pours out of him.

  His lifeless body collapses between them, and then everyone branches off again like we didn’t just take out one of the more powerful Uppers in existence. Zagan’s fallen behind the protection of what’s left of his army, either calculating his next attack or an exit strategy. The count of Lowers covering the ground outnumbers those still fighting, so I’ll bet he jumps on the latter.

  My control over the amulet seems to have increased, and I impale demons with lightning while hovering ever closer to Abaddon. Partly so he doesn’t get himself killed, but mostly, I’ll need to snag him as soon as Zagan retreats. Our roles reversed when I found out I was getting my light back. He just doesn’t know it yet. But if he figures it out, he’ll bolt, and Donny the Destroyer is nearly impossible to find down in the pits.

  Out of the corner of my eye, I catch a new source of darkness. I rotate toward the rock formation, ready to light up a demon until my heart thrashes in my chest. Nyx smiles when I look up. She’s holding the Dimming Blade—my light in her perfect fucking hands. But I’m more stuck on the hands, the legs, the face I expected not to see for decades.

  I’m not even paying attention to the arm Hex has around her when I blink onto the boulder next to her. My mouth covers hers before she even realizes I’m there, kissing her like it’s already been a lifetime. Fuck, I wouldn’t have lasted in that godforsaken cage without this.

  Since we’re still technically in a battle over my life, I break away from her. Hex hasn’t moved his arm from around her yet, and I’m about to explain why he should when I’m blindsided. And not with a fireball or a flame, but fucking Donny himself, using his body like a battering ram to knock me off the rock.

  We crash to the ground inside the burning circle. I blink to the center with him right behind me, and a guttural sound rips through me as I stalk toward him. A Lower gets between us, and I toss him into Cass’s line of fire. Donny barely moves more than his arm to clench another around the throat—with the same look he had while his grip tightened around mine.

  He lets the body fall once I reach him, and I step right into his face, but he refuses to back down as the two of us seethe at each other, almost nose to nose.

  I’ve wanted to look him in the eye while he dies since I got out of his fucking cage. Now, we’re finally here after all this time, and I won’t lay a finger on him. Other than to shove him into the same barred prison I called home for centuries.

  After one last crack of lightning, the air stills, except for the crackle of flames surrounding us. The fighting has stopped, and Zagan and whatever Lowers remained are gone. Leaving only one last order of business to take care of before I get my light and life with Nyx.

  Donny’s minions appear at his sides, and I sense Cass and Rosdan drop in behind me. I step backward, falling into line with them. Cass shakes his head when the Upper stretches his hand. The three demons flanking him give the three of us a scan before they share a silent exchange. Their self-preservation kicks in, and once they teleport, it’s just us and the Demon of Destruction.

  I notice the spelled chain piled nearby, and Abaddon’s throat jumps in a hard swallow when I move toward it. Throwing a look over my shoulder, I catch a glimpse of Hex teleporting himself and Nyx down in front of the boulder. As I pick up the links, she starts for me.

  “Shit,” I say. “One of you might have to deal with Abaddon.”

  Cass shakes his head but surprisingly smiles. I make a mental note to ask what the hell they did to their charges to have their powers for so long, but right now, I have a woman with a blade to tend to. Cass steps toward me for the chain, but when I look behind him, it falls from my hand. The metal clinks, hitting the ground, and Cass’s head jerks to what Rosdan and I are already staring at—everything back to shit in an instant.

  Nyx isn’t running toward me anymore. She’s not running at all.

  I hold out a hand and take a slow step. “What the fuck?”

  Hex grins from behind her, his arm across her chest. “Small change of plans,” he says, clutching the Dimming Blade. “I’m going to need you to kill Abaddon.”

  She struggles to get away from him, but he only holds her tighter against his chest.

  “I will,” I say. “The next time Nyx dies, she’ll unbind us. I’ll even invite you to the banishing.”

  “Now, I’m afraid.” Hex slides backward, dragging her farther away from me. “See, if it’s my plan that kills him, then I’m responsible for his death, and his title transfers to me.”

  Donny teleports closer to me, his flame out. “You ungrateful—”

  Cass cuts him off with, “And if we don’t?” He and Rosdan are facing each other with their sides to me, and I see his hand flexing, ready to strike the demon down if given a chance. “If we decide to stick to our plan, are you going to kill her?”

  “Never. Well, never again,” Hex corrects. “If you refuse, then I disappear”—he tilts his head to talk to me—“with your girl and your light.”

  As long as I’m mortal, the Uppers will come for me—for my brothers’ charges and Kai and Avery. It wouldn’t even do me any good to go in the cage. Not to mention, Nyx would be condemned to two lifetimes of being held by him.

  “We’ll track him,” Rosdan says.

  “He won’t hurt her,” Cass adds. “She’ll be safe until we find them.”

  But while my brothers are looking at me, I’m tracing every inch of Nyx’s face. Her eyes fill with tears, and her fingers pry at Hex’s forearm.

  She starts shaking her head when I rub at the chain around my neck. “Chaz!”

  It might take longer than a century for her to forgive me for this, especially if I’m not around to beg, but my thumb catches, and I pull the amulet from under my shirt.

  “Don’t you fucking dare,” Cass barks at the same time as Rosdan says, “Brother…”

  Nyx is fighting even harder against the demon’s hold and cries out. Like what happens next is even a choice—our messy ending. Just not the one either of us expected.

  “Chazaqiel,” Abaddon says from beside me, his voice cracking.

  I roll my head toward him and shrug with my hands. “What did I tell you, Donny?” My fist tightens around the crystal, heating by the second. Samy always did have a thing for self-sacrifice. It burns a brand into my palm as I look back and smile at Nyx. “Love will kill us all.”

  “Wait—”

  That’s all Abaddon gets out before the amulet detonates.

  The flash of divinity illuminates the night sky with the two of us at the center. For every second of calm and peace the white light brings me, the darkness inside screams. Shadows flood out of the demon beside me, his head thrown back. They scratch and claw around my chest with both of us dropping to our knees at the same time.

  But it’s not Donny I’m watching. I’m not sure if it’s because we’re within the light, but I see everything on the outside perfectly. My brothers’ shocked faces, Hex with the dagger by his side. And then her.

  A part of me has always been mildly curious about what it would be like to die. To be a mortal and have your soul leave the body and float up to the beyond or whatever, not quite sure what comes next. The bright-light bit I buy—wanting to go toward it even if it means leaving everything else behind. For as long as I’ve been deprived of the divine light, if it were to shine on me again, like they claim, I would have expected my incorporeal ass to sprin
t toward it—until recently. Now, I realize I was a fucking idiot for ever wondering. Screw the light, the afterlife, my eternity, all of it. None of it matters at this moment.

  Dying fucking hurts. And I’m not talking about the physical pain.

  The real torment is the last of my soul feeling ripped apart—courtesy of the look on her face as she watches it happen. But if I could have picked the last thing I wanted to see, it still would have been her. It would always be her.

  The last of the light hasn’t even faded yet when I break away from Hex. Tripping over demon corpses, I fall more than once as I struggle to get to Chaz. And then I collapse to the ground for an entirely different reason.

  “No, no, no.” I say it so many times, like a word can undo any of the mayhem from the past thirty seconds.

  I kneel beside him, pushing his shoulder and arm over and over, begging him to move. But he stays perfectly still, not a scratch on him. With each shove, the amulet shifts on his chest, its crystal split in two. Abaddon lies feet away, his body burned and no darkness inside him anymore. No life.

  “Fuck!” Cass shouts from behind me, and then Rosdan appears at my side.

  My breaths come fast as I glance up at him. Everything spins—my head, the world.

  “Is he…”

  “Dead,” I choke out. Tears spill down my cheeks, but I swallow them back. “He’s dead.” My voice is stronger the second time. More resolute.

  I sniff and swipe under my eyes, forcing measured breaths to calm myself. Then I knock the amulet away, pushing up his shirt, and I place my hands flat on his chest.

  Here’s another thing about death: it’s not over until it’s over. I just have to start before he finishes.

  Blowing out one more exhale, I focus deep inside myself. Somewhere under the skin and muscle and all the rest of the junk is what really separates us from death. And I grab on to it with everything I have, dragging it from where it should reside and putting it where I need it to be. Inside of him. Not a month or a year. All of it.

  A chill starts in my hands and feet, slowly creeping its way to the center. I feel the life draining from me, my heart pounding harder but slower. Each breath grows longer and less effective while my muscles ache and tire. After a few seconds, I can’t hold myself up anymore.