Guarding the Truth

by Becca Jameson

  Parker moaned and hung his head. “I’m sorry. That was uncalled for. You don’t deserve it, and none of this is your fault. I’m just tired and…and I need some sleep.”

  She didn’t know what more he may have been about to say in the pause, but she felt bad also for her name calling. It wasn’t in her nature. At least it hadn’t been before her entire world had spun on its axis and dumped her out into the universe.

  “I’m sorry too,” she mumbled, barely audible, she knew, but her head was downcast, and she didn’t feel like looking him in the eye. The mixture of hurt and desire written on his face was killing her. She sagged her shoulders.

  “Let’s eat. And get some sleep. You might not be tired, but I have to sleep so I can figure out our next move tomorrow with a clear head. You could watch TV or something if you want. It won’t bother me. I can sleep like the dead.”

  “I know.” The intimate admission slipped out of her lips before she could stop it. And she busied herself serving them each a slice of pizza on stiff motel tissues.

  “Thanks.” He was nothing if not polite. Why did she never notice he didn’t act like a young college guy? Hadn’t he always handled her like a queen since the day they’d met, all proper and gentlemanly? Nothing like a young guy would probably act, but what did she know about it?

  Wait. Did he say… “You don’t have a plan? You don’t know where we’re going?”

  Parker laughed around a bite of pizza and then spoke through it with his mouth full. So much for her assessment of him as refined. “Don’t look so horrified. I have a general idea. I have a few connections.”

  Madeline’s mind raced as Parker climbed into his side of the bed and hugged the edge. Now there was the gentleman she’d been pondering earlier.

  Madeline turned out the lights and headed for her own shower. When she returned shortly, the grime of the day’s adventures rinsed away, Parker was sound asleep, still maintaining his distant spot on the bed.

  Chapter Ten

  Parker awoke with a start. His watch read six fifteen, but he was rejuvenated and had slept hard. It was time to get a move on. He wanted to be sure to stay one step ahead of the enemy.

  Gently, he rolled over and laid his hand on Madeline’s slender shoulder. She made a small noise and moved to snuggle deeper into the covers. He didn’t have the heart to rouse her yet.

  In the darkness, Parker dressed in new jeans and a gray T-shirt and slipped on his tennis shoes. As he leaned over to tie the laces, Madeline whimpered in her sleep and thrashed about under the blankets. His heart ached for her. She obviously was having a nightmare, probably brought on by the reappearance of her assailant. He padded over to her side of the bed and sat alongside her warm body.

  “Madeline, honey, wake up,” he softly implored while stroking her cheek with the back of his hand.

  To his surprise, she reached up and placed her soft delicate hand on top of his burly rough one and held it there. She inhaled and asked, “Is it morning?”

  “Not quite, but we’re going to get on the road. I don’t want to risk hanging around too long here.” She didn’t mention the bad dream, perhaps no longer aware of it.

  “Okay, give me a minute.” After letting go of his hand, she rolled away and headed for the bathroom. The retreat of her warmth saddened him, and once she was out of the room, he leaned over and laid his head on her pillow to soak up some of the heat she left behind and inhale her sweet scent.

  God, he had it bad. Would she be able to forgive him?

  * * *

  Once they were on the road, they resumed the silence of yesterday, but it wasn’t nearly as strained. It reminded Madeline of the kind of quiet experienced between two people who had been together for many years and were simply comfortable with the lack of noise.

  Had her parents enjoyed such moments? Or was her father always the way he was now, uptight? Maybe the death of her mother had changed him in some way, scared him into being overprotective to keep from losing his daughter to the same fate.

  “Do you need to stop? Or do you want to grab some granola bars from the back seat?” Parker’s voice broke the reverie.

  “No, I’m fine. I’ll see what I can rummage up back there,” she stated as she turned to dig through the bags of items in the back of the car. “Want a bottle of water?”

  “That would be great, thanks.”

  As she handed him the water and snacks, their hands touched and reignited the flames that had been not quite extinguished a short twenty-four hours ago when all hell broke loose.

  As much as she wanted to remain angry, she could not bring herself to continue the farce. She was in love with this man. Deeply and irrevocably in love with him. And she had no doubt he was too. But would the lies between them be insurmountable or could they somehow jump the void and land together on common ground when this was all over? Would they even be alive?

  “Tell me about yourself,” she requested. It was a start.

  “Okay, hmmm. Well…”

  She watched him ponder what to say.

  Finally he began. “I was born in Milwaukee. My father was a firefighter. Some of his friends were cops. I always knew I wanted to be involved in law enforcement somehow. It was in my blood.”

  He glanced at her with a smile. “My mom, she was a housewife until I was in high school, and she took a job as a secretary at the local elementary. They’re both retired now. They weren’t young when I was born. Typical childhood. No big incidences to mention. I have one sister, younger. She and her husband live outside Milwaukee, near my parents.”

  “How old are you, Parker?” She’d realized at some point yesterday that he was not in his early twenties as she’d previously assumed.

  “I’m thirty-one. But age is just a number.” He grinned over at her. She tried to return the favor, but knew it was somewhat forced.

  Wow, thirty-one.

  “After high school, I went to the University of Wisconsin with Mark. We roomed together and both graduated with a degree in criminal justice. Mark went on to the police academy, and I went to graduate school for two more years and then entered a program with the Special Forces. I was trained as a spy early on, but soon realized I was better suited protecting people. I seem to have a talent for spotting what no one else can see.”

  “Apparently so, or I wouldn’t be here now,” Madeline stated matter of factly. She watched the expressions on Parker’s face as he told about his life. He was comfortable with himself, proud.

  Parker nodded. “That’s partly true, though I do wish I’d been more diligent yesterday morning. I knew Jones was out there somewhere. I shouldn’t have let you waltz over to the window. I let lust cloud my judgment. It won’t happen again. I promise.” He was dead serious, and his gaze darted back and forth between the road and her face.

  “I know you won’t.”

  “Anyway, I’ve spent the last several years as a private agent hired to protect lives. Usually government officials on business or wealthy men who’ve pissed off their mistresses.” He was trying to lighten the subject and he chuckled.

  “Or snobby, naïve, rich girls whose daddy wants them to stay out of trouble.”

  “Madeline, don’t be so hard on yourself.” He reached over and grasped her hand. The personal space they had adapted in the last day shrunk. Had it only been one day? One day since Madeline’s world changed forever? Again.

  She allowed him to continue holding on to her. It felt like a life line. Perhaps she wouldn’t keep falling into the dark hole in front of her if he would hold on to her hand. Thankfully he did. She felt more relaxed when he was touching her. Warm. Cherished.

  “If it makes you feel any better, I never once thought of you as snobby or rich, naïve maybe.” He chuckled and squeezed her hand a little tighter. “But not stuck up. You’re a breath of fresh air. A blank canvas waiting to be painted on. I hope you’ll be able to forgive me and allow me to be the artist of your future.”

  His soft genuine words were like p
oetry. How could she deny him? She felt tears well up in her eyes and looked away, out the window on her side of the car. He left her alone with her contemplation until she finally mumbled the words she knew were necessary, “I’m sorry.”

  “For what?” He reached cautiously for her face and turned her cheek toward him. He abruptly let go, though, to pull over to the shoulder and put the car in idle. Then he resumed his position with his hand lightly on her cheek and faced her fully.

  “Sweetheart, please do not shoulder the responsibility for this…breach of trust. I had no business treating you the way I did. I never should’ve so much as laid a hand on you, and I went so far as to take complete advantage of your youth and trust. Hell, Madeline, I slept with you. You were a virgin, and I took that away from you without thinking. I was insensitive, and I’m ashamed of my behavior. My job was to protect you, not take you to bed and devour your innocence.”

  She cried silently, tears flowing down her cheeks and over his hand. The air from the car vent blew across her face, creating a chilled path where the lines of tears lay untouched.

  Parker never looked away. “If I could take back what I’ve done, I would do so in a heartbeat if I thought it would stop your hurt or prevent you from being in danger, but the truth is I’ve totally fallen for you, so much it hurts.” She watched as he laid his free hand over his heart. “I pray you can forgive me or at least move on with your life after this is over and not hate me for what I’ve done.”

  Parker gently pulled Madeline toward him and wrapped his arms around her.

  He loves me. That’s all that matters. We’ll get through this. She prayed this awkward thing that had settled between them would alleviate itself in time and they could start over.

  “I’m still sorry,” she finally managed to express against his chest, “for my part in all this. I feel bad because I knew I was not the woman you thought you were dating, albeit incorrectly, and I kept on, dragging you into my fake world. A world I had no intention of staying in. I was lying to myself and you, and it was wrong.”

  She could feel the vibrations of his chuckle deep in his chest. “Can we agree we were both wrong and start over then? Maybe we’ll learn to like the real us, together, as a couple.”

  “I’d love that.” Her smile was genuine. For the first time in a month, she was being her true self. And it felt good. Right.

  * * *

  “We have to exchange this car, and we’re out of gas again.” Parker was in a world all his own. Madeline could practically see the gears grinding in his head. He was coming up with a plan. They’d been heading south now for quite some time, judging by the angle of the sun.

  “Okay, what can I do to help?”

  “Sit there and look pretty so the guy at the car lot will give me a deal?” She was going to love watching him smile like this someday. Hopefully with more frequency. But for now, he was extremely preoccupied and usually had a scowl on his face while he sorted out their predicament.

  “I can do that.” She struck a pose of what she hoped was subtle flirtiness.

  His smile came out again. “Yes, you certainly can.”

  They pulled into a lot in a small town on the western side of New Mexico, hoping to trade their current car for something else without arousing suspicion. Not to mention avoiding a repeat of yesterday’s bubble girl performance when the cash came out. They didn’t need the police on their tail. They were getting too close to wherever they were headed, according to Parker’s latest infrequent pronouncements.

  Fortunately the salesman was congenial and easy to bargain with. He showed them a few cars, seemed to buy their story about not liking the smell of cigarette smoke in this old used car, which was true, and took their cash right out of Parker’s hand without batting an eye.

  In no time they were back on the road, now sporting a run-down, forest-green Jeep Cherokee that had seen better days. Nothing like the previous car.

  Madeline felt freer than she had in two days on the road. The tension ebbed away as they took on a new identity of sorts. Surely they could stay one step ahead of this madman. But for how long? And how long was Parker willing to run? What if her father demanded her return and stopped paying him? Would Parker let her go? A chill ran down her spine at her wandering imagination.

  “You okay? You look like you saw a ghost.” Parker was one uber-observant guy, but then, that was his job.

  “No, I’m fine, just cold.” It was a lie, and he had to know it. Even the frame of the car door was hot to the touch in the afternoon heat.

  “Two more hours and I promise we’ll be at a nice safe refuge.”

  “Where’re we going?” She’d tried not to ask this too often, but the suspense was building.

  “You’ll see.”

  Madeline drifted off and spent the last bit of sunlight dozing. The last thing she remembered was Parker’s amused snicker at her inquisitiveness.

  * * *

  “Madeline, honey, we’re here.” Parker hated to wake her again, but wanted to get her inside and in a more comfortable position.

  “Hmmm. Where’s here?” She roused herself and sat up straight. Parker opened the driver’s door and pulled her over and out his side, steadying her sleepy form.

  “Welcome to Wikieup, Arizona. Well, near there, anyway.”

  The front door of the quaint cottage in front of them opened, and his long-time partner and sometimes lover bolted out to greet them. “Parker? Parker Phillips? Is that you?” It had grown almost dark, and in the lingering twilight, he knew Christine could barely see him. He was surprised she recognized him at all, considering how long it had been since he’d last seen her. “I can’t believe it’s you. Come in. Come in. It’s hotter than hell out here, even in the evenings. Weird for this time of year.”

  Christine Jacobs was no longer with the force, or any force, for that matter. She’d changed her course in life after a close call when she got shot in a raid, and if his recollection was correct, was now reclusively writing a novel, one she never seemed to finish last he heard. It didn’t matter. Her severance and hazard pay would enable a lifetime of relative comfort.

  It had been about three years since he’d even spoken to her. He felt a twinge of guilt at showing up on her doorstop like this, but he needed help, and he knew she would come through for them.

  They entered her humble home, and Parker sensed immediately the love she’d put into every detail. The entire bungalow was decorated with brown and rust colors. The plush carpet and enticing beige, leather couch invited one to sit, stay a while, or never leave. The walls were covered with desert paintings of landscape and Native-American art. The air was filled with the scent of pine, which he inhaled deeply.

  “Christine Jacobs, meet Mad…well, never mind. Better if you don’t know her name.”

  Christine didn’t even flinch at the preposterous suggestion. She knew Parker well. She looked healthier, happier than he remembered. Her blond hair bounced freely instead of pulled into the tight bun she used to wear. Her pale skin was tanner than before.

  “Welcome. Sit.” She took Madeline by the hand and led her over to the sofa covered with plump pillows in a variety of autumn colors. Madeline looked relaxed enough, but Parker knew she was chomping at the bit.

  “Can I get you guys something to eat or drink? You look like you’ve been traveling for…wait…let me guess. Two days? One stop briefly at an out-of-the-way hotel?”

  “You nailed it.” She still had it.

  Christine made a short hop and clapped her hands together in front of her. “It’s been so long since I analyzed a situation. I don’t get many visitors out here.” She addressed this last bit to Madeline. Always the hostess, Parker thought as he recollected their earlier days.

  “But, no. We’re fine. We stopped to grab a burger recently.” Parker paused, not sure where to begin, and glanced over at Madeline, hoping to express his love and alleviate her discomfort with a look. She seemed satisfied, if her blush was any indication.
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br />   “So, you need a place to hide out for a while and some supplies, I presume?”

  “Nailed it in one again.” He was pleasantly surprised by how much she still knew him after all this time.

  “Can you afford to sleep here for the night? Or do you need to move on right away?”

  “No. I think we’re okay for now. But I don’t want to risk endangering your life. We should leave before dawn to be safe.” Parker hoped she wouldn’t be frightened by his admission, and she didn’t disappoint. Not even a flinch.

  “Okay then. I’ll show you to the guest room so you can freshen up, shower, or whatever you need, and then get some rest.” She was still so sharp she could easily sense this was no average girl he was protecting this time, but a lover.

  “That would be great. But I’m hoping I can impose on you for one more favor.” Parker was hesitant about his next idea, but thought it was worth a try. He was counting on her previous intricate knowledge of computers to help them out.

  “Anything. You know that.” She was the most generous hostess, even to these extremely unexpected guests. But then, everyone he’d graduated from the force with would do the same for any one of them. It was not in their blood to deny any one of their brethren.

  “I’m hoping you may have the means to circumvent any lines of communication on the computer so we might get word to a few people that we’re okay.” Parker saw Madeline visibly sit up straighter at the possibility of getting word to her father.

  “I think I could arrange something. Let’s see what we can come up with. Follow me.” She motioned for them to accompany her and led them to a tiny office she clearly used to do her writing when she wasn’t entertaining unexpected guests.

  Christine sat at the little desk chair and typed with so much speed, accuracy, and assuredness that Parker thought the little machine would start spinning and shoot off through the roof. The only sound in the room was the clicking of her fingers running rapidly over the keys.

  She announced, after what seemed like only a brief pause, “Done, you can rest assured anything you say on this frequency will be scrambled and untraceable.”