Absolute Shopping Addict- Volume 1

by Way Woo

  “Also, one of ours down in production forgot the bubble wrap,” another analyst added. “We gave the buyer our standard compensation package. Thirst for Power is what we reward customers who spot packaging mistakes.”

  By now Keldarian had gotten over his anxiety attack.

  “We goofed,” he admitted. “With those hidden stats and the Thirst for Power, he’d double his defense and be able to get the Werecrocodile and its escorts to focus on him while his fellow adventurers picked them off.”

  “The questions now become, how did we get into this situation, and how do we get out of it? We can’t go around spoiling our adventurers and make them think they can turn this game into a damned power fantasy!”

  “Well, sir, based on the purchase logs, this player was focusing on package deals and those 72-hour events we were doing a dry run on our test server,” the analyst added.

  “Think about it,” Keldarian said. “If this is him at the black label, imagine him if he gets to the gold label, or heaven help us, the diamond label! If the membership level goes up too, what next?”

  “Then what can we do? Block his access?”

  “If we do that, the Bureau’s going to be on our ass like white on rice. That’s not OUR job.”

  “What about his purchasing pattern? Anything that stands out?”

  “The sample size is too small to make any useful analysis, sir,” the analyst replied, “but when I looked at what he bought so far, he tends to favor event items that have a limited run."

  “Okay. Okay. I got it,” another analyst added. “I think we can fix this problem, cut it off at the pass before it becomes a catastrophe. Let’s keep going with the limited run events, and keep the prices high.”

  “Are we talking about items that need a lot of points to buy or things that require other conditions aside from points?”

  “Exactly!” the analyst said. “What do you think? Is it a good idea?”

  “Okay. If he does make the time limit, price, and other conditions, what then?” Keldarian asked.

  “If he does? We continue and escalate if we can. Right now, we have to pretend that nothing amiss is going on right now. We’ll need to write a petition to the administrators that someone gained access to our Hero Shop test server when we haven’t even given out the access code yet.”

  While Keldarian was enumerating the things he needed to do and his assistants were writing them down, the analysts were having their own conversation while looking at the anomaly they just discovered. “You don’t think this will cause us to go out of business, right? I do not have any money saved,” an analyst began.

  “And that’s why we have to come up with a good event,” the other analyst said. “An appealing and functional event, one that will be hard for this guy to achieve.”

  “Exactly,” Keldarian said, having finished his plan. “But remember this -- it’s important to make it look like he can achieve it. That is one of the secrets of making a good event. If the event’s circumstances are too ridiculous, he’s not going to bother. If it’s too easy, we’d be shooting ourselves in the foot. Do you know what to be planning for now?”

  “Yes, sir!”

  “All right. Hand in your proposals to my assistants before this day is over. Chop chop, people!”

  ***

  Although the event that will hinder Jake Smithson from his passion has begun, the back office of the Hero Shop in Nohas has yet to plumb the depths of his desire for, and addiction to, shopping.

  In other words, they ain’t seen nothin’ yet!

  Episode 11

  ***

  The man known as Jake Smithson opened his eyes to see the beautiful blue sky of Nohas, only to notice the nonstop arguing that had roused him from the sleep he needed after giving that Werecrocodile the beating of its short life.

  “What were you doing while we were fighting for our life, then?”

  “Are you blind? We were on the other end of the battlefield and kicking more ass than you were! “

  “Right, kicking ass while running around, ‘fiercely’ trying to survive.”

  “Are you trying to tell me something?”

  “I don’t know, you tell me!”

  Despite Jake coming across as a bit of an eccentric, he did have a good insight on human nature – he wouldn’t have lasted that long at his job if he hadn’t.

  And his insight was proving correct as he tuned out the arguing, proving a hypothesis in his head correct. As he looked at the corner of his eye to see the notifications he missed while sleeping off the backlash of the energy drink he took to help with that boss fight, he carefully thought about the events of the previous day.

  Despite his hobbies and eccentricities, Jake had been gifted with a good eye for people, and it served him well as soon as he figured it out in middle school, high school, college, employment, and now this.

  The way his observations were right on the money nearly every time unnerved him. “You don’t really know who are until all hell breaks loose,” he muttered, still amazed at his accuracy.

  While the first battle was where it all began, it was during the second invasion and the Werecrocodile showing up that the facade of civility that the adventurers were wearing fell off, revealing their true nature.

  And now everything changed.

  This wasn’t a play fight anymore, this was a battle of survival… and in times of crisis, expediency ruled.

  After putting those thoughts away, Jake focused on starting his day by reading through the notifications and the bargains he’d be going for today.

  All right, I’ve gotten quite the haul from the Werecrocodile. I still need quite a bit of points to get the package – might as well go and ask the store where to go next.

  It was just typical of him to consider the adventurers becoming territorial with a bit of indifference, as there was something just a bit more important to him right now than other adventurers’ human nature making themselves known.

  After all, those sweet Black Label Hero Shop deals won’t buy themselves.

  Unfortunately, halfway through his browsing, he saw a group of adventurers making their way towards him, prompting him to recall another bit of wisdom: “sometimes you don’t need to go and look for trouble – trouble will go out of its way to look for you.”

  ***

  “What were you doing by yourself?”

  “You’ve got some information that only you know, why don’t you share it?”

  “What were you doing when you went out of town?”

  Jake had to resist rolling his eyes at the makeshift inquisition he was being subjected to.

  Typical, he thought. People only have the guts to say what they want if they have the advantage of numbers. And those who weren’t there when the Werecrocodile was around are in my face and thinking I didn’t do anything.

  Or maybe they were too busy looking at that punk Liam.

  Maybe I can just chalk it up to them being that forgetful and stupid.

  And stomping his way to the forefront of the group of adventurers was a very familiar knight.

  This guy again.

  Meanwhile, Seamus the knight was giving this guy another appraising glare while his guild companions were peppering him with questions.

  This guy’s strong, but he won’t do anything while others are watching.

  I have to figure out how this guy got stronger. Otherwise, he’s going to be untouchable.

  Liam’s different. It’s like he was made for this type of adventure: powerful, confident, talented.

  Like those once-in-a-generation geniuses, Liam went to this world ready, and gained a lot of followers due to his skills.

  Let’s see here… Seamus thought as he discreetly used his status screen to take a look at Jake’s stats. Looks like he raised a lot of stat points. Strength and agility improved a lot. Is avoiding damage one of his skills?

  He’s gone a long way from when he picked up a rock and went after those goblins.

  An
d the time an arrow going at full speed only inconvenienced him.

  Nothing about this guy makes sense. He doesn’t have the equipment to be great. Just a bat. Some defensive skills. So how did he get this strong, this fast?

  Seamus had a hunch about how this happened based on the times he saw Jake leave town while others were panicking.

  Was there something out there he acquired to become that much stronger?

  Internally, Seamus seethed. He would not let this upstart hog this secret for himself.

  And then Jake opened his eyes and gave the people asking him a barrage of questions a bored stare.

  “Is this really important that you have to bother me this early? I don’t remember borrowing anything from any one of you,” he replied absent-mindedly, all the while leafing through the catalog of the Black Label Hero Shop at the corner of his eye.

  The knight made his move, and raised his hand, shushing the impromptu crowd. “We’ll have a better chance of surviving if we all become stronger, wouldn’t you agree? If you know something about getting stronger that we don’t, please share.”

  After the battle with the Werecrocodile, the impression the adventurers had of Jake changed: from looking at a strange guy, they were now looking at a scary strange guy.

  Jake took a moment off browsing to look at the adventurers gathered, and noticed the fear in their eyes they were trying to cover up by the endless questions.

  Something else was there, too: curiosity. They also wanted to hear the answer to Seamus’ question, and the knight was milking the moment for all he was worth.

  I’ve run into too many people like you not to notice, Jake thought, seeing through the ruse.

  Even then, he gave the best answer he could, completely ignoring the fake smile and the obviously leading question.

  “There are more monsters around here besides the ones that are attacking Brino,” he said. “If you want to get stronger, go out and hunt them.”

  Get stronger. Ha. Fat chance. I just go out of town because I need to buy shit more than I do anything that’s not eating, drinking, sleeping or breathing.

  But, of course, I’d be an idiot if I said that aloud.

  Judging by their reactions, I made it sound just cool enough for them to give it a try.

  “There’s a wide world outside Brino,” he said, before standing up and turning towards one of the alchemists giving away free potions in celebration of their victory against the Werecrocodile. “If you want to hunt together, be my guest. I do my best work alone.”

  He turned away from the crowd, his path moving away from most of the other adventurers. Jake already set a destination for himself – he saw his next task laid out for him.

  Mount Mushin, where the Iron-Beaked Fantails made their nests.

  The directions in the Black Label Hero Shop were clear.

  To purchase the package Jake wanted, he required not only points, but something else, too.

  He needed a certain amount of these birds’ beaks – only then would he be able to make the purchase: oh, and what a package it was.

  [Swiftstone Sword Package

  Swiftstone Sword – Contrary to popular belief, Swiftstone weapons are not solely made of this extra-terrestrial iron. All Swiftstone weapons are based on an alloy mix of Swiftstone Iron and Sheerdark Steel, put together by our talented group of artisans to produce a weapon of extraordinary power, durability, and weight.

  Great Sword Mastery – A combat manual that allows the user to wield Two-Handed Swords, Great Swords, and Giant Swords. A must if you want to wield the Swiftstone Sword to its full potential.]

  Jake read up that the reason the Iron-Beaked Fantails acquired the taste for flesh was because their beaks evolved to concentrate the Swiftstone Iron within, gained from the plant life growing on Mount Mushin.

  Which meant that the beaks had the Swiftstone Iron needed to make the Swiftstone Sword… and that should he gain enough of those, he would trade in the beaks for a finished weapon, which the artisans would use to make the next one.

  Just before he turned in for the night after the Werecrocodile battle, he was in awe at the description of the Swiftstone Sword – all of these items would be personalized, hand-crafted, and signed by the lead artisan who forged it.

  Jake fell asleep and dreamed of wielding the weapon, saying out loud in his dreams that “This is my sword. There are a few like it – but this one is mine.”

  The fact that the bundle cost only 22,000 points while the sword and the manual separately cost 15,000 points each also helped. With the reward for defeating the Werecrocodile reaching 10,000 points, well… those items were expensive.

  But the discount. He could not say no to an 8,000 point discount.

  And thus, the fate of someone living from moment to moment, discount to discount was sealed…

  He looked in the distance, saw the mountain shrouded by fog, and his determination to get the package deal, come hell or high water, grew even further.

  ***

  As he began making his way out of town, some adventurers were still badgering him with questions.

  “There are monsters outside Brino?”

  “Why didn't you tell us? Were you trying to keep them all for yourself? “

  “How easy were they to hunt?”

  Jake tuned them out easily, but the nagging feeling going over him saying that he had to at least say something to these other adventurers grew unbearable after a while.

  “If you guys work together, you can hunt stronger monsters. Just don’t stray too far away from town and you should be okay.”

  The now-mollified and red-faced adventurers took his advice and quickly left to their respective guilds, no doubt in order to organize a hunting party for themselves.

  Someone else, though, was continuing to follow him for far less noble reasons.

  ***

  The Iron-Beaked Fantail looks harmless from a distance.

  But the closer you get to it, the more you realize.

  This isn’t just a pigeon.

  It’s a giant pigeon, with an iron beak, a wingspan larger than a man’s… and a taste for flesh.

  If you know what it is, it’s already scary enough.

  However, it’s the beak that makes it dangerous.

  Since it looks more like a pigeon, adventurers tend to ignore the beak… except at the moment when arms and legs are torn off due to the innate sharpness of the Swiftstone iron the beaks of these birds are made out of.

  It was armed with this information that Jake stood close to the foot of Mount Mushin, looking upwards to where the fantails were circling the peak.

  Groovy.

  Ten of these birds’ beaks.

  Let’s get this grind going.

  Jake could start hear the coos of the Iron-Beaked Fantails half an hour away from Brino, and now that he was this close, he could hear the gigantic pigeons cooing and grunting that much louder.

  It sounded like the roar of challenge to someone like Jake, who was now coughing up lyrics as he slowly made his way up the mountain path.

  Keep my mind on the money, money on my mind.

  Got my fingers on the bat and staying on the grind.

  And when I wake up in the morning I have to check my bit,

  Saw my ten thousand and counting points as I set up my kit.

  A third of the way up, and Jake was met with no warning before a gray flash sped in front of him.

  Only the luck he had prevented him from being sliced open, a cut in his shirt revealing that yes, the Iron-Beak Fantails had found him, and they were giving him a royal welcome.

  “My defense is pretty high, but that would have wounded me pretty badly,” he said out loud. “It stands to reason, since these guys’ beaks are being used for that weapon.

  “I think I might have to burn some capital and invest in myself a bit further,” he added as he moved towards a nearby rock, hiding in its shadow to stay out of another fantail’s line of sight.

  When he s
aw the coast was clear, Jake moved on.

  Thankfully, at the end of the path, there was a small cave that gave him a little respite from the Fantails, and allow him to access the Hero Shop.

  With practiced ease, it took him less than a minute to get to the Hidden Stats department, and saw that there was another special.

  “Physical Defense Manual costs 4,500 points. Magical Defense Manual costs 4,500 points. If you buy both, your next purchase of a Physical or Magical Defense Manual will only cost you 1,000 points,” the shop said.

  “Two Physical Defense Manuals and one Magic Defense Manual it is, then,” Jake said sadly. He couldn’t help but let out an annoyed breath because this was his share of the earnings from taking out the Werecrocodile boss.

  But a few moments later, Jake decided that this was one of those times where “you have to spend money to make money”, and he pulled the trigger on the deal. It WAS an investment, so he told himself.

  His mood quickly went back to its usual status as soon as he saw the magic message.

  [Your item has been successfully delivered. Please check your inventory.]

  He quickly opened the package, read the manuals, and left the cave, moving up the mountain and wishing he had some way of reaching flying opponents other than baiting them to dive towards him and hitting them as they pass by.

  ***

  Some distance away and further down the mountain, a group of adventurers led by Seamus were pursuing Jake to find out the secret of his power.

  “Of course! That guy knew something!”

  “I know, right? He never stopped for any reason on his way to the mountain. There must be something in that mountain!”

  “He’s trying to get stronger by himself and then he’ll make his move: dominate and rule over us. We’re here to make sure that will never happen.”

  “If he enters the mountain, we'll follow him in.”

  This was what they were saying as Jake left the village and made his way to Mount Mushin to hunt the Iron-Beaked Fantails, so convinced they were that Jake knew something they didn’t, which was why they were in the mountain, trying to find the thing he was hiding.

  And when they’d find it, they’d gain what he had, too.