The Only Reason: A Novel (Trident Trilogy: Book Two)

by Donna Schwartze

“I don’t want you to leave me alone. It’s not like it’s all okay—because it’s not, and I’m not sure when it’s going to be—but I don’t want you to leave me ever again.”

  “I will never leave you again, Millie. I swear. And I will do absolutely anything you want me to do. You get to make the decisions from this point forward.”

  “I want to go to Aza’s funeral. She’s going to be buried next to her husband in Sarajevo. I only knew her a few hours, but she gave me my mom. All the stories she told me . . . it made Mom a real person to me.”

  “Are you sure you want to go back to Sarajevo? Chase told me everything that happened to you there.”

  “I’m sure. Will you come with me?”

  “Yeah, sweetie. I will,” he says, squeezing me tighter as he kisses my forehead.

  “I want to see Mom’s grave, too. And the place where you found me when I was a baby.”

  “Are you sure you want to see all that? You’ve been through so much.”

  “I want closure on that part of my life, and I think that’s how I’m going to get it.”

  “I’ll show you whatever you want to see if you think it will help.”

  “It will. And then I want to go home—to San Diego,” I say, looking up at him. “Are you coming there with me?”

  “Do you want me to live there?”

  “Yeah. That was our plan, right?” I say, reaching for his hand. “We just added nine years to my countdown calendar.”

  “Yeah, Mills,” he says, letting out a long sigh of relief. “That was our plan. How about we finally make it happen?”

  Epilogue

  Millie

  Sarajevo, Bosnia

  2020

  Dad woke me up this morning to tell me he was going to the hotel restaurant to have breakfast. I almost had a panic attack. We’ve been in Sarajevo for two days, and I haven’t let him leave my side. I still can’t sleep. When I close my eyes, I think I’m going to wake up and he’s going to be gone.

  We’re scheduled to stay a few more days here, but I think it might be time to go home. Maybe getting back to my routine will help calm my nerves a bit. In the last two days, we’ve gone to Aza’s funeral, visited Mom’s grave, and seen the building where Dad found me. I even showed him where Yusef and Fareed kidnapped me. I think I’m done with Sarajevo now.

  When I walk into the restaurant, I see him sitting in the corner at the perfect table to have a complete, unobstructed view of everyone in the room. Mason always chooses that table, too. I guess some SEAL habits never die.

  “Hey, I ordered my breakfast already,” he says as he motions the waitress back over. “Do you want a hard-boiled egg and fruit?”

  “I’ll have three pancakes,” I say to the waitress in Bosnian. “With strawberries and powdered sugar on top—no syrup. And lots of coffee. Thank you.”

  As she turns away, I look back at Dad. He’s shaking his head.

  “I still can’t believe you speak Bosnian,” he says, smiling.

  “Yeah. And Pashto. And Spanish. Some Farsi and Bari and a little bit of Urdu.”

  He looks at me, speechless with his eyes wide.

  “I’ve acquired a lot of new skills since I was sixteen.” I reach across the table to hold his hand.

  “I see that,” he says, squeezing my hand. “I feel like I don’t even know you anymore.”

  “You know me,” I smile as the waitress puts my plate in front of me.

  He looks down at my plate and laughs. “Extra fluffy.”

  “It’s the only way to eat pancakes. You know that.”

  “I definitely do.”

  “Hey, Dad, I know we have two more days scheduled here, but are you okay if we leave today? I think I’m done.”

  “Of course, honey. Back to San Diego?”

  “No. Virginia Beach first. Mason is there for a few more weeks. And Chase is still there getting debriefed.”

  “Do you want me to change the plane tickets?”

  “I already did. We leave in four hours.”

  “Still independent and bossy.”

  “You have no idea,” I say, smiling at him as I stuff more pancakes into my mouth.

  When we’re done with breakfast, I call Mason to tell him we’re coming home. I pack but decide to leave all the clothes Alex bought for me behind. I hope someone gets good use of them, but I never want to see them again.

  Our cab driver is particularly chatty. I talk to him the entire way to the airport—in Bosnian—about his family. Every time I look at Dad, he’s shaking his head and smiling at me. I’m not sure he knows how to deal with adult Millie yet, but I know he’s so happy he gets to try to figure it out.

  Dad’s been lecturing me since we got to the airport about buying first-class tickets. As we walk into the plane, he looks around uncomfortably at the passengers sipping on cocktails and lounging back in their luxury seats. “Are you sure you can afford these first-class tickets?”

  “They’re on Camille. I told you how much money I got on her house sale,” I say as I look for our seats. “The money is really yours. She would have left it to you if she knew you were alive.”

  “No, it’s yours. I’m sorry you had to deal with finding your grandma dead. I should have been there for that . . .” His voice trails off for a second. “I should have been there for a lot of things. I’m sorry.”

  “You have to quit apologizing. I told you I’m not mad at you.”

  He nods as he grabs my roller bag and lifts it to the overhead storage. As Dad turns around, he sees the man across the aisle from us leering at me. He’s been staring at me since we got on the plane. I notice he already has an impressive display of empty liquor bottles in front of him. He taps Dad on the leg.

  “Damn, man,” he slurs as he looks at me with disgustingly appreciative eyes. “You married up.”

  Dad instinctively steps in front of me to block his view. “She’s my daughter, asshole. And keep looking at her if you want to lose both your eyes.”

  The man’s focus drops immediately to his phone. Dad stares at him for a second longer before he sits down next to me.

  “Dad, I thought we agreed you didn’t get to do stuff like that anymore. Remember? I’m an adult now.”

  “Did we? I’m getting older. My memory must be starting to fade.”

  “Dad.”

  “Millie,” he says, taking my hand as he looks at me with his gentle eyes. “I know this is going to take time for you. I’m not expecting it to be the same as before, but I’m still your dad. I can’t turn that off and I don’t want to. I’m still going to protect you from assholes.”

  I take a deep breath. “Fine. But you need to lay off Mason. He’s not an asshole.”

  “That’s still being determined.”

  I roll my eyes as I reach down to my backpack. The plane is freezing. I put on my fuzzy socks and Mason’s fleece and then cover myself with the blanket out of the seat pocket.

  Dad grabs his blanket and puts it on top of mine. “I’m assuming you want my blanket, too?”

  “Of course. It’s good to know you haven’t forgotten everything about me.”

  “I haven’t forgotten anything about you,” he says, taking off his jacket and wrapping it around my feet. “Including that you like a separate blanket wrapped around your feet because they get the coldest.”

  “Still true,” I say, focusing my adoring eyes on him.

  He smiles. “Why don’t you try to get some sleep? You said you haven’t slept really well in days.”

  “Yeah. Every time I close my eyes, I’m worried when I open them, you’re going to be gone.”

  “I’m never going to be gone again, Mills,” he says, kissing me on the forehead. “Close your eyes.”

  I take a deep breath and close my eyes as he starts quietly singing.

  �
��‘What’ll you do when you get lonely . . .’”

  My eyes snap open as I look up at him.

  “What? You think I forgot your favorite lullaby?” he says, smiling. “Close your eyes, sweetie.”

  “‘And nobody’s waiting by your side? You’ve been runnin’ and hidin’ much too long. You know it’s just your foolish pride. Layla . . .’”

  Epilogue

  Mason

  San Diego, California

  2020

  When she comes into the bar, I’m sitting by the pool table in the exact place I was when she walked into my life a little less than a year ago. I remember when I saw her that time—it was like someone shined a flashlight right into my eyes. It’s happening again. She finally sees me across the room and comes flying at me full speed.

  She jumps up and wraps her arms and legs around me tightly. I close my eyes for a second and inhale the sweet smell of her hair. When I open my eyes, Mack is standing about ten feet from us, looking like he wants to try his right hook on me again.

  “Your dad is staring at us,” I whisper in Millie’s ear.

  She laughs, not loosening her grip on me at all. “Does that make you nervous?”

  “A little bit.”

  “Well, I’m sure I can find another guy in the bar who’s not intimidated by my dad,” she coos as she brushes her cheek against mine. “I mean, Butch is looking pretty cute with his new haircut.”

  “I think I’m going to be fine,” I say as I kiss her softly. “And please don’t ever even joke about finding Butch attractive again.”

  She whispers in my ear, “Do you want to go out to your car for a second?”

  “Yes, I do. And it’s going to take more than a second.”

  I put her down and divert my eyes from Mack’s as we walk past him.

  “Where are you going?” Mack says to Millie.

  “We’re going outside for a second. I’ll be back.”

  Mack grabs my arm and glares at me. “Hell no.”

  “What?” Millie looks at him innocently.

  Mack keeps his eyes fixed on me. “You want to take my daughter outside for a second? Hell no.”

  “Dad,” Millie says, rolling her eyes.

  “What’s happening here?” Chase says, spinning around on his bar stool.

  “Mason wants to take my daughter outside to the parking lot,” Mack says.

  “Oh yeah,” Chase says, looking at me. “That’s not going to happen.”

  “No!” Mille says, pointing at him. “Dad’s been gone nine years. You’re on Team Millie now.”

  “I’m on Team Marsh, and I’m going to have to agree with the elder statesman on this one,” Chase says, patting Mack’s shoulder.

  Millie walks over and stands right in front of Chase. “Yeah. You don’t get to have an opinion on my sex life for reasons I’m sure you don’t want Dad to hear about. Or would you like me to tell him about the shower incident?”

  “What’s this now?” Mack says, turning to Chase.

  “Take a pass on this one, man. Trust me,” Chase says, turning back away from us. “You’re on your own, Mack. I’m out.”

  “Mills,” I say, putting my arm around her, “let’s hang out here for a while and then we can go to the hotel.”

  “Don’t let him bully you,” she says, looking at me. “I’m not sixteen anymore. I’m a grown woman. I can do what I want.”

  “I’m going to take the path of least resistance on this one,” I say as I signal to Pete for a drink.

  “Wise choice,” Mack says, looking from me to Millie.

  “I have to go to the restroom,” she says, pointing at Mack. “But this isn’t done.”

  “Love you, honey,” he says, blowing her a kiss.

  She scrunches up her face as she tries not to laugh. I don’t think I’ve ever seen her look this happy. It seriously sends a warm feeling all the way through my body.

  A few minutes later, I see Millie pulling a guy by his hand through the bar. I tap Mack and nod toward them. He hits Chase, and we all turn around on our bar stools as she pulls him forcefully up to us.

  “Brian, this is my boyfriend, my dad, and my best friend,” she says as she drops his hand.

  Hawk and Butch come up and stand behind her.

  “And I don’t even know what they are,” she says, waving her hands back at them.

  “We’re her backup singers,” Butch says, putting his head on her shoulder. “Millie and the Frogmen. Look for our new album to be released around the holidays.”

  She pushes Butch’s face away with her hand and looks back at Brian. He’s already starting to take a few steps back. “You have two choices,” she says to him. “Quit harassing me or leave the bar with a few broken bones. What’s it going to be?” She waves her hand toward us like she’s offering him a choice of which door to open.

  Brian does a quick sweep of the eyes that are now all fixed on him. “I think I’m going leave you alone now,” he says as he turns around and walks away quickly.

  “Good choice, Bri,” Chase says at his retreating back. He turns to Mack. “Apparently, they’re getting smarter.”

  “Unbelievably, it would seem so,” Mack says as they turn back toward the bar.

  I pull Millie between my legs. “So are you finally starting to embrace the protection of others?” I say, laughing.

  “I’m accepting the inevitable. With Dad back, I can’t fight the tidal wave anymore.”

  Butch walks up behind us. “Y’all want to play pool? Millie still owes me some money.”

  Mack turns around as Millie says, “Dad, this is Butch. He’s on Mason’s team.”

  “It’s my pleasure, Mr. Marsh,” Butch says as he reaches out to shake Mack’s hand. “I know your daughter very well. Of course, not in the biblical sense like Mason does.”

  I shove him toward the pool table and start to follow him.

  Millie grabs my arm. “Wait, aren’t you going to be my partner?”

  “Sorry, babe. Butch is my pool partner. You need to find someone else.”

  Butch turns around. “I’m willing to share, though—maybe a three-way?”

  “Pass,” Millie says quickly.

  “I don’t know, Mills,” Butch says. “Watching you shoot that gun in Pakistan kind of turned me on. You want to go out sometime or something?”

  “Are you going to stuff me in a duffel bag if I say no?” she whips back at him.

  “You know, if that’s what turns you on, we can talk about it.” Butch laughs as he grabs his pool stick.

  Mack has that deadly look again. I pat him on the shoulder. “Mack, if it were possible to shut Butch up, I would have done it years ago. Believe me, your daughter can more than handle herself with him.”

  Butch looks back. “Millie, who’s your partner?”

  Millie looks at Mack. “Are you any good at pool?”

  “Are you?” He looks surprised.

  “I told you, Dad. I’ve picked up a lot of new skills since you’ve been gone.”

  “Why doesn’t that make me feel any better?” Mack slides off his bar stool and accepts a stick from Butch.

  I hand Millie a stick. “Your dad breaks. I’ve seen what happens when you do. We’re not falling for that hustle again.”

  She smiles innocently at me. “Aww. That’s so sweet. Are you scared of me, babe?”

  “Absolutely. I’m not even trying to hide it.”

  As Mack breaks, I pull Millie to me. “Are you happy, babe?”

  “For the first time in a long time, I feel almost perfect.”

  “Almost? What’s it going to take to get you all the way to perfect?”

  She snakes her arm around my waist and whispers, “Maybe we can brainstorm ideas when we get back to the hotel tonight.”

  “Yeah. I’m su
re we can think of something,” I say as I pull her in for a kiss.

  The End

  Thank you for reading The Only Reason. If you have a few seconds, will you please leave me an honest review on Amazon? It helps me more than you will ever know.

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  If you haven’t already read the first book of the trilogy, Eight Years, you can buy it on Amazon. The third book will be published in 2021. Stay tuned to my social media pages for updates.

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