His eyes swirled blue, but not as deep as before. Slowly, his tail lowered, the threat no longer there.
“You’re hurt.”
He tilted his head slightly but failed to straighten it. Curiosity, without comprehension.
Tess dropped to her knees. “Come back to me, Damien. I promise, I won’t leave you this time.”
His wolf approached her, scenting her neck, her torso, and lower. It was purely animal in nature, but without threat. Damien was in there, somewhere, he had to be. She had to figure out how to reach him.
Tess sat on the cold, wet forest floor and continued talking to Damien, hoping her words would trigger a memory in him. After a long time, his wolf finally laid down in front of her. With a slow but steady hand, Tess sifted her fingers through his fur, inspecting his wounds. They weren’t healing, not as a shifter’s would. He was mostly wolf, now, and would heal slowly in the wild... as she would in the world of humans.
Long strokes from the top of his head down his back soothed him as he licked his wounds. More wolf than shifter, but not fully wolf, not yet, or he wouldn’t be sitting here with her. Hours seemed to go by as she recounted how they met, recited every conversation, and described each encounter she could remember.
A laugh bubbled up from somewhere deep within her. The wolf raised his head. She searched those blue-gray eyes for any sign of Damien.
“You’re trapped in there, unable to shift to human form, just as I’m trapped in human form unable to shift to wolf, Damien. Talk about not being on the same page. We really have to work on this timing business.”
Her laughter turned into crying, and Tess buried her head in the wolf’s thick, furry neck. “I never meant for this to happen. I was afraid I wouldn’t know how to love, how to be loved as incomplete as I was. The WSSO stole my ability to shift, but I’m the one who trapped myself with my own fears. And now you’re paying the price, stuck as a wolf. I’m sorry, Damien.”
“Shh…”
Tess froze as a hand smoothed the hair away from her face. She lifted her head and opened her eyes to see Damien in human form.
Gray eyes stared at her with the same wildness that she had seen in his wolf. “Damien?” she asked cautiously, wondering how much of him had returned.
With both hands he gripped her face. He plunged his tongue into her mouth and kissed her as if he’d never let go. Tess fell into the kiss and his arms, letting all the fear and guilt wash away as his tongue danced with hers.
When he released her, she ran her hands down his neck, over his back, arms and legs.
“I like where this is going,” he said, with a seductive growl beneath his words as he pulled her against him.
His cock was hard and pressing into her thigh.
“I’m looking for wounds. You were just in a fight.”
“I like the way you fight better,” he said, waggling his brows.
She struck his shoulder, and he winced. He twisted his head to see over his shoulder and glimpse the wound. “Just grazed.”
She hissed when she saw the where the bullet had grazed him. “Let’s get you back and clean that so it doesn’t get infected.”
“I can’t go back.”
“What do you mean? That’s your pack, your family.”
“My wolf is still fighting me, Tess. I don’t know how long I can maintain control. I’m not even sure how you pulled me out. It was like I was swimming in a bottomless pit of oil and mud. Every time I saw the slightest ray of light, I’d reach for it and get pulled back under.”
Tess withdrew her knife and sliced across her palm and then offered the knife to Damien.
His brows furrowed, and then he shook his head. “No.”
“What do you mean, ‘no’? It’s the only way.”
“My wolf is strong. We don’t know what a blood-bond would do at this point. He could rebel, try to kill you. And I’m not sure I’d be able to stop him.”
“Then what? Go back into the forest, lose yourself to the wolf for sure?”
With the pad of his thumb, he dried her tears. “It’s a battle I started a long time ago, and I plan to win it, but not with you here. I will not risk you.”
* * *
DAMIEN
“I was wrong to deny you the blood-bond. You, we, need to try!” Tess pleaded.
She couldn’t understand, and Damien wasn’t sure he could explain it. He only knew the truth of the matter; his wolf had grown too strong to control for long. His bridge between shifter and wolf had not been broken as some theorized happened to a shifter who went feral. It was controlled, guarded by the wolf, the wolf who trapped the shifter, forcing him to submit.
Damien was tethered to his wolf, who would pull him back and pin him down very soon.
“No, you’re not leaving me,” Tess said, before he could walk away.
She reached up and pulled his head down, covering his mouth with hers. “You will fight for me, for us, Damien,” she said when she surfaced for air.
Before he could object, her hand began sliding along his cock, building a pleasure he had not felt in so very long. Damien drew in air as he scented the length of her neck. A single lick down her throat, and his cock pulsed with need. It had been too long since he last scented her, touched her, tasted her.
Before long, he stripped her bare and eased her down onto a nearby patch of grass. His mouth found the junction of her legs and the source of that lovely scent that had imprinted on his brain and his soul long ago. When his tongue dragged through her plump folds, over her juices, she came alive beneath him. As he sucked on her enticing nub, her fingers dug into his scalp, pulling at his hair, claiming him, owning him.
His wolf did not agree; his wolf owned him. But for one brief moment, Damien’s wolf had slipped and let Damien seize control, control he could not maintain for long. With a growl, Damien rose above her, pinning her arms and legs with his torso.
He could hear the slight flutter of the vein at the side of her neck and the tantalizing smell her arousal. She held no fear of him or his wolf. She was his to claim, theirs to claim.
With one forceful thrust, Damien was inside of her, her wet heat sheathing him in a way that told them this was where he belonged. His wolf quieted, reveling in the claim. It was the first sign of compromise his wolf had afforded him in a long time.
Then Damien realized why. This beautiful woman beneath him was to be nothing more than another conquest to his wolf. He would have Damien force her into submission, as he had once before. Damien roared as his thrusts gained a frenzied pace. Her hips were rising to meet him. What he read on her face–trust, bliss, and hope–had no place here. His wolf would destroy her if he felt threatened. She shouldn’t have come.
She didn’t understand the battle within. Even now, dark thoughts swirled in his head as the wolf realized that she was a threat. If his wolf didn’t subdue her, she would tether him to his shifter side. His wolf demanded Damien strike her, kill her, do whatever was necessary to sever her hold on him.
Tess moaned as her legs wrapped around his back, allowing him to thrust deeper. Her moans called to Damien. No, he would not let his wolf hurt her. Damien struck out at his wolf, biting it in the scruff of the neck like one would a disobedient pup. It had to understand, no matter what happened between shifter and wolf, she would not be harmed.
As Damien sank into her warm flesh, he said, “You will leave.” His wolf quieted at his words. The treacherous beast wanted her gone.
“Not without you,” she struggled to say. He could tell she was so close, the orgasm was nearly within her reach, but she was holding off. In this too, she was waiting for him.
With his wolf momentarily and blessedly quiet, Damien took long hard thrusts, filling her to the hilt until finally she let herself tumble over the edge, taking him with her. As her walls squeezed him, he closed his eyes, enjoying the sensations, the ecstasy of being with her, being inside of and one with her. He would hold this moment in his soul for a lifetime. Even if his wolf
permanently forced him into submission, pinning him down so he could never rise, this moment would stay with Damien.
The sound of a knife pulling free of a sheath sounded unnatural out here in the tranquility of the woods, but Damien could not fathom what was happening until he felt the sharp blade tear through his right palm. Blood coursed down his hand and wrist, only to drop and pool in the grass below. Then her flesh slapped against the open wound, her strong slender fingers entwining his, as her fingernails dug into his skin.
A thud in the tender grass near her shoulder drew Damien’s attention. A bloody knife lay by an empty sheath that was attached to the jeans he had peeled from her body only minutes ago. Damien’s eyes flew to his right hand, locked together with Tess’s left. Blood dripped from her palm, down her wrist, and arm as well, mirroring his own wound. Palm to palm, wounds paired against one another, blood mingling.
A blood-bond!
His wolf roared in anger.
“No!” Damien howled, even as his wolf sank his teeth into Damien. Rage, pure unadulterated rage. Terror struck at Damien’s heart, his soul, knowing what his wolf would do to her if he forced a shift—when he forced a shift. His wolf would kill her!
“I’m sorry, Damien,” Tess said, with tears spilling from beautiful, green eyes. “I had no choice.”
That’s when Damien heard his wolf’s growl so deafening in his ears that he tore his hand from her grasp with brutal force. A sickening snap followed by her scream filled the forest as Damien broke Tess’s wrist. He had no choice! He had to get away from her; his wolf was taking control, and his wolf would kill her.
Chapter Twenty-Five
TESS
Damien was gone. She had performed the blood-bond without his consent, without the ritualistic words or witnesses. Two simple cuts and co-mingling of their blood. She had hoped it would work, and for a moment she thought it had. When he realized their bloody hands were clasped together, his anger had risen so swiftly, so completely, that she feared her blood, changed from the virus, had adversely affected him, that she had done more harm than good. Her instincts said to continue, to hold on to him until their blood stopped flowing, to give the bond a chance.
The anger in him doubled, tripled even, as the wildness returned to his eyes with a vengeance. She had lost him to the wolf again. He ripped his hand free of hers. She screamed from the pain as her wrist hung at an odd angle, broken.
Then he was gone. Nothing but a blur of silver fur running through the trees.
She had failed, utterly and miserably. She couldn’t save Damien.
Tears clouding her eyes, Tess made an attempt at getting dressed. Her shirt was on, possibly inside out. Her bra was somewhere. She didn’t particularly care where. The shirt would have to do. The jeans hung loose on her hips, too hard to button one-handed. Giving up didn’t seem right. After all, Damien had never given up. The pack believed he had given up and let himself turn feral, but she knew the truth. Damien had been locked in a battle with his wolf, and she had dealt him a blow by leaving him, but he had never truly given up.
Which is why she couldn’t either. She didn’t even know what that meant for her, except that she couldn’t stay here in the middle of nowhere. She’d go back to the pack, lick her wounds, or maybe just curl up under the covers of her bed for six months until she could finally accept that Damien was gone.
Between the pain in her wrist and the numbness that invaded her soul, she wasn’t sure she was even walking in the right direction. Thick clouds blocked the moon, leaving little light by which to walk. She stumbled and fell more than once. By the time she smelled the pungent ash of a fireplace, a patrol found her. One of the shifters tried to carry her, but she had growled at him. Yeah, she had been around one too many wolves today.
“Sorry,” she said, and he nodded, seeming to understand. That was the last word she remembered saying. The rest became a blur.
Hayden stood before her. Words… words… words. A question. About something she should know. More words.
Aloe now. Fewer words. An attempt to hug Tess, but she pushed Aloe away, too. No one should touch Tess. Only Damien. Damien who was gone and would never return.
“Gone.”
That was her voice. That one word started a whole new round of questions. Blade now. His words faded into the wind. He’d made it back… she wanted to smile, but couldn’t. And Frank. He said nothing, at least not with words. His face said enough.
Someone dared touch her long enough to move her in the direction of Damien’s… no, Hayden’s house, now. She really hoped that bitch wasn’t there.
So tired. This time when someone scooped her up, she didn’t fight. Her eyes closed, and she let her head fall against a heavily muscled chest, one that reminded her of Damien’s. She breathed in the shifter’s scent. Not Damien. Callen. Damien should be the only one carrying her up those stairs.
The bed Callen laid her on was familiar, too familiar. Damien’s scent still clung to the pillows.
More tears.
Then a shot in her arm. Words and more words. Why wouldn’t they leave her alone? Her wrist really hurt. If Pryce didn’t stop touching it, she’d punch him with her good hand. Luckily, she was a righty.
Her eyelids were getting so heavy. Soft lips kissed her forehead, and she didn’t fight this time because all she wanted to do was imagine that it was Damien kissing her forehead, as he had done so many times before. She let her eyes close and drifted off to the only place she could still be with Damien—in her dreams.
* * *
Tess slid from bed, feeling like crap. She hadn’t showered in… Hell, she didn’t even know what day it was. A fresh stack of clothing with a folded newspaper rested atop the dresser, reminiscent of her first days here, except no tall, handsome alpha sat by the window reading the paper.
She dragged herself over to the dresser, stretching sore muscles. As she reached for the paper, she discovered a blue, plastic cast on her broken wrist. Pryce had gotten to her, no doubt. Tess checked the date on the paper. August eleventh. Three days since she’d left Drake’s. Two since she’d found Damien and…
She tossed the paper into the garbage can. No, she wasn’t going to sit here and cry all day. At least she’d try not to. That meant getting dressed and going downstairs to start. She eyed the jeans, bra, and sweatshirt. Even with her wrist in a cast, the thought of dressing seemed so taxing and useless. Her stomach growled. Ah, the hell with it. Tess grabbed the robe and headed downstairs.
“Where’s the skank?” Tess asked as she entered the kitchen... an overly bright kitchen given the mood she was in. The sun was streaming in, which right now felt like a slap in the face. Clouds, rain… those would have been much more appropriate.
“Excuse me?” Hayden said as he poured a cup of coffee.
“Sorry, I shouldn’t have said that. I meant the woman that was here last time. You know, the one who called me ‘human trash’.”
“I thought it would be best if she went home while you’re here.”
“Again, sorry. I didn’t mean to upset your love life.”
He shrugged. “I’m not sure it qualifies as a love life. Tillie’s shallow and power hungry. It wasn’t going to last, anyway.”
“Good.”
“Excuse me?”
“You need to stop saying that. Tell me to stop being a bitch if you want, but stop saying that. It’s bad enough I feel like I’m seeing double. I don’t need to be hearing it, too.”
“What do you mean double?” Hayden pulled a chair out for her at the table.
“I don’t know. My vision’s a bit wonky. Like the rest of me. My wrist aches, my palm stings, and I feel like I’ve been beaten up.” Tess slid into the chair and propped her head up on her good hand.
“You look it,” he said. His expression was a mixture of confusion and regret. “Aloe and Pryce got you cleaned up and set your wrist the best they could, but he wants to take you to town to get an x-ray and have a… sorry, Tess… a human docto
r check your wrist to make sure it will heal properly.”
“I didn’t think I could sink any lower,” Tess said as she laid her head on the table.
Hayden petted her hair, and it reminded her of Damien. Hayden was all she had left of Damien, now.
“I should have left Drake’s pack on time. I should have insisted.”
“Drake wouldn’t have listened.”
Tess’s stomach knotted. Anna! Had they rescued her yet? She had told Hayden about her three days ago, time enough for him to launch a rescue.
“What about Anna?” she asked. Tess needed one positive thing to hold on to right now.
Hayden lowered his coffee. “We haven’t been able to get anyone over the border yet. Drake’s tripled the patrols, likely because of the trouble Damien’s been causing.”
“Damien?” she asked, hope flaring.
“Sorry, I meant his wolf.”
“Blade can go in. Damien always said he could infiltrate any building, any camp,” Tess said, trying to focus on Anna and not Damien’s wolf. At least he hadn’t been put down. She held onto that fact, and yet it didn’t matter. Even if Hayden’s trackers didn’t kill Damien, Damien was lost to her, to everyone.
“Blade is resisting. There’s bad blood between Blade and humans—”
“But Anna doesn’t have anyone else!”
“I’ll talk to Blade again, but I won’t order him in, not under these conditions. It’s too risky.”
“He’s going,” Tess said, not sure where that attitude was coming from. “I’ll see to it.”
“He won’t be easy to convince, especially when he hears you’re refusing to see a doctor.”
“Are you blackmailing me, Hayden?”
“Maybe. Look, Tess, we’ve all been through hell these past few weeks. And I have to do what’s best for the pack, and that includes taking care of each shifter here, including you and Blade. Blade’s not one to be forced, and he respected Damien.”
Damien’s Dilemma Page 34
