Lost Soul

by E. A. Copen

  “And you need to tell Emma what’s going on, whether my father wants you to or not.”

  “Hey,” I protested.

  She just kept talking over me. Not that she’d heard me, but that was beside the point. “Friends and family aren’t a weakness. Love doesn’t make you soft, and hope doesn’t just give you more to lose. It gives you something worth fighting for. I, for one, want to give Mask more fight than he knows what to do with. That means I want my future step-mother and all her fury here, fighting beside me.”

  Nate smirked and leaned toward me. “Lazarus, I think you were just overruled.”

  “Smart kid,” I said, smiling back. “Make it so, number two.”

  His eyes lit up. “I’m your number two? But you have too much hair to be Picard, and you’re not near as diplomatic. Or dashing. Or—”

  “Okay, Nate. I get it. Sheesh.”

  He laughed. “Well, anyway, I’m glad you both agree because I kind of already called her on my way here. I didn’t want to lie to her anymore. I just couldn’t do it. I asked her to meet me here. She should be here anytime.”

  I should’ve been mad at him for telling her, but it was water under the bridge now. We had more important things to be focused on. “It’s okay, Nate. Before she gets here, though, I wanted to talk to you about something else.”

  Paula slid two perfect over-easy eggs onto a plate with some buttered toast and put the plate in front of Nate alongside a steaming cup of black coffee. He picked up the coffee and took a loud sip before heaving a relieved sigh. “Don’t tell me coffee’s not the nectar of the gods, Laz. It’s as close as we humans will ever come.”

  Never thought I would miss coffee so much. I didn’t need it since I was just a spirit and spirits didn’t sleep, but there was nothing quite like having that first cup of the day. I resolved to enjoy a lot more coffee when I got my body back too. “I have no idea if such a thing exists, but I’d like to introduce you to someone. In fact, it’s someone everyone here should meet.”

  Someone rapped loudly on the back door. Everyone in the bar gave each other confused glances.

  Paula tossed the dishrag she was using to polish glasses over her shoulder. “This had better not be a trick of some kind,” she growled and went to the back to open the door. She returned a minute later, backing into the bar.

  Remy drew the sword at her side. “Paula?”

  “There is no cause for alarm.” Baron Samedi removed his hat and stepped through the doorway. “I’m on your side, sha.”

  I snorted and floated away from the bar. “When it suits you. Nate, tell them not to get all worked up.” Most fae tended to get antsy around anything associated with death, especially powerful supernatural beings. The Baron was certainly an imposing figure, but he was no threat to them.

  Nate shoved another forkful of eggs into his mouth before doing anything. “These are good eggs. Oh, Laz says don’t worry about him. He’s friendly. Mostly.”

  “Nice threads,” Finn said.

  Samedi tugged on his suit jacket proudly. “I wish I had the time to discuss the finer points of high fashion with the fae, but sadly I do not. My dealings with your people have been limited, usually through intermediaries. like my Horseman. Unfortunately, he is out of commission, which means it falls to me to be an ambassador for myself at the moment.”

  “What do you want, Samedi?” Remy asked. “Why are you here?”

  “I am here, sha, because I was invited. But more than that, I am here because, unlike some other Namers, I cannot allow Death to have a day off. The position is too important, especially with what you have planned. As such, I have asked Lazarus to put forward a temporary replacement.”

  More like I’d asked him if I could. I’d been tossed into the position of Pale Horseman without any training or idea of what I was getting into. I didn’t want that to happen to my replacement. But if he wanted to take credit for it, I wasn’t going to argue over something so minor. I was just glad the guy had shown up when I asked him to.

  “A temporary Pale Horseman?” Nate said with his mouth full of eggs and toast. “Who’s even qualified for that job?”

  Samedi’s grin widened. “According to Lazarus, you are.”

  Nate almost choked. He had to pound on his chest to get the food to go down, and even then he wound up doubled over, trying to catch his breath. “Me?”

  “It’s only temporary,” I added, hoping he wouldn’t turn it down outright. “And it means you’ll have to come with us when we go to liberate Faerie.”

  “Having the mantle there would be super helpful. We need every advantage,” Remy said, nodding.

  “You can still refuse,” I said. “I want to make sure you know what you’re getting into, even if it is only temporary.”

  Nate sat very still for a moment, his hands resting on his knees. Then he turned, picked up his coffee, and chugged the whole thing before asking, “Where’s the bathroom?”

  Not exactly the response we’d all been hoping for.

  Chapter Twelve

  The toilet flushed and the sink turned on, the sound muffled even through the bar’s thin walls. I paced in the hallway outside the bathrooms while everyone else waited in the bar for Nate’s response. If I’d had fingernails in my current form, I would’ve chewed them off.

  Nate emerged, running a brown paper towel over his fingers.

  “So?” I asked as he tossed it in the trash. “Did you decide?”

  “I think so.” He stopped as the door swung shut and ran his hands over his shirt. “But I have questions.”

  “I’ll answer them if I can.”

  He shrugged. “Why me? I’m not strong. I don’t have powers, other than being able to see you apparently.”

  I reached to put a hand on Nate’s shoulder before I remembered I couldn’t and quickly withdrew it. “Nate, you’re one of the strongest people I know. Having magic doesn’t make you strong, and sure doesn’t qualify you for this job. Not even temporarily.”

  “Then what does? I just don’t understand where this is coming from.”

  “A good, strong moral compass,” I answered. “Respect for both the living and the dead, unshakable conviction. But most of all, you need hope to be a Horseman.”

  He frowned. “Hope?”

  I nodded. “Hope that tomorrow will be better. Sometimes, that’s all that kept me going. As the Pale Horseman, I’ve dealt with a lot of crap. Things get dark. Scary. I won’t lie to you. When I took this job, I found out the hard way why most Horsemen don’t last very long, especially as the Pale Horseman. It can really get you down, seeing the worst in the world all the time. Some days, it was hard just to get out of bed and face the day, knowing what was out there. I held onto the hope that at the end of the day, my friends and my loved ones would be waiting for me. Even when I didn’t think I’d make it home, every choice I made was in the hopes that no one would have to lie at my funeral about me being a good person. More than that, though, hope is what will get you through when you’re beaten and bruised and you don’t think you can get up anymore. That and a healthy dose of stubbornness.”

  “Well, I have that down,” he said with a nervous laugh.

  “I know you believe in the good in people. I’ve seen it every time we’ve worked together. You’ll fight to protect them, and you’ll do it for the right reasons. That’s why I chose you.”

  Nate swallowed hard and looked down at his hands. “But that’s not why I’m going to accept the job. I’m accepting because I want to be there when they find Jessica, whatever’s happened to her. I want to be strong, and the good person you think I am. I don’t know if I am, but I want to try.”

  I was surer at that moment that I’d made the right choice than I’d ever been before. Nate was going to be perfect for the position, far better at it than I could’ve ever been.

  We went out to the main bar, and everyone stopped mid-conversation to stare at Nate.

  “I accept,” he announced.

  “Good
for you,” Ulmir grunted.

  Baron Samedi extended his hand. “Then take my hand.”

  Nate took Samedi’s hand.

  When I became the Pale Horseman, I had experienced every death possible in quick succession while standing at the bottom of a grave. My mind hadn’t been able to tell the difference between the magic coursing through my body and what was really going on. When the magic had let me experience the flesh melting from my bones in a fire, I’d felt every agonizing moment of it. I’d felt bullets tear me apart, explosions blow me to bits. My lungs had seized as the magic had convinced my brain I was drowning, and I had watched my body age and decay when it had told me I was dying of old age. Accepting the Pale Horseman mantle was one of the single most awful events of my life. I’d been so paralyzed by the pain and shock I couldn’t even scream.

  Nate managed a shocked gasp as soon as their fingers met. He sank to his knees and shook while tears streamed from his scrunched eyes. Teeth clenched, sweat-drenched, he accepted the power that had once been mine.

  What horror he must’ve been experiencing, dying over and over without any reprieve. I should’ve warned him, but if I had what difference would it have made? There was no way to prepare for that sort of magical onslaught.

  It took a minute, maybe two, though it felt like it took a lifetime. When Samedi released Nate’s hand, Nate collapsed to the side with a small cry. Remy went to kneel beside him, a sweating bottle of water in her hand.

  “It is done,” Samedi announced and turned to me. “You have only a few days left to finish your task, Lazarus. I cannot put off digging your grave forever.”

  “About that.” I avoided his quizzical gaze. “I found two pieces, and I know where a third is, but I have to fight this guy to get him to give me the last piece in a duel. I kind of promised you would referee for us the night after tomorrow at the Superdome.”

  “Couillon,” he muttered. “Very well, I accept. What are the terms of your duel?”

  “Well, I need a second and he really, really wants to punch my face in, so I figured we were just going to fight it out.”

  The Baron rolled his eyes, produced his cane out of nowhere, and leaned on it. “How very human of you. Well, make sure you bring your second with you to the duel. If you don’t, you’ll forfeit the match. Don’t expect me to go easy on you either. My job is to be fair and impartial. Besides, I think it would do you some good to have your face punched a little. Might improve your looks.”

  “Ha-ha. Very funny.”

  “Oh, I almost forgot.” The Baron snapped his fingers, and my iron staff appeared in his free hand. He carefully placed it on the floor in front of Nate, making sure not to bump Remy in the process. “A Horseman needs a badge of office, after all.” Samedi held out his hand, and his top hat appeared in his fingers. He placed the hat on his head before nodding to me. “Until tomorrow night, then.” He made a show of removing his hat to bow to both Finn and Remy. “Your Highnesses, it has been a pleasure. I wish you good fortune in your coming battle.”

  He walked to the door, opened it, and paused before stepping aside to hold it.

  “Thank you,” said Emma to the Baron as if he were any other man holding the door for her.

  Samedi smiled and lifted his hat before letting the door swing closed.

  “Oh, my God. Nate!” Emma hurried to Nate’s side as he was shaking the cobwebs from his head.

  “I’m okay.” He groggily accepted the water from Remy and swallowed a little.

  Finn loomed closer, arms crossed. “Better than okay. He’s the new Pale Horseman.”

  Emma looked up at Finn. “The new… But Lazarus is still alive, isn’t he?” She grabbed Nate by the shoulders. “Nate? Please don’t tell me that’s why you called me here.”

  Nate shook his head and blinked hard. “I’m tired. You’ll have to ask him for yourself. Talk to your fiancé, would you?”

  He reached out and took my hand. A shock of power surged up my arm and through my spectral body as if I’d just grabbed a live wire. Something invisible yanked on me. Although I didn’t physically move from one place to another, air rushed by and space shifted around me, colors brightening, lines sharpening as Nate hit me with just a small dose of the Horseman’s power.

  Emma’s eyes widened. She let go of Nate and slowly rose. “Lazarus?”

  I looked down at myself. My body wasn’t solid or as bright as the ghosts I normally made visible, but then I was a necromancer. Nate’s powers would be slightly different, more muted. “I think so,” I said, running my hands over my chest. “Most of me anyway.”

  Before I could stop her, she rushed forward to try to hug me, but even though I’d become visible, I still wasn’t solid. She caught only empty air before stepping back, eyes watering. With a deep breath, she composed herself and looked accusingly around the room. “How long have you all known he was like this?”

  “He made us promise not to say anything,” Nate said as Remy helped him up. He wasn’t steady on his feet, so someone brought him a chair.

  “I changed my mind, though. I remembered I promised I’d bring you in if there was any ass-kicking to be had.”

  Her eyes snapped the sword at Remy’s side, noticing it for the first time. “You’re going to fight Mask in Faerie.”

  I nodded. “Wanna come?”

  “I…” She hesitated, staring at me. I expected her to chew me out, but when she spoke again, her voice was softer. “Are you going to be like this forever?”

  “Not if I have anything to say about it. I’m working on fixing it. My soul shattered when…” I winced. “When I did what I did. It’s going to take me a few days to gather all the pieces and put them back together. As long as I do it in the next few days, though, I can come back. That’s what makes this trip to Faerie dangerous. If we’re gone too long…”

  “Then let’s not waste any more time. I’ll get my guns.”

  “Guns?” Ulmir stroked his beard. “As in plural? I like her.”

  A small butterfly fluttered in through the broken window and landed on Remy’s outstretched finger. She stared intently at it for a long moment before reporting, “The High Court’s forces have assembled, and they're marching toward the rendezvous point as we speak.”

  “Good.” Finn walked to the nearest shadow, reached into it elbow deep three times, and extracted the Speaking Stones he’d collected. “Now we just need Khaleda to come through with her forces, and we might actually be able to pull this off.”

  “Demons, fae, and humans fighting together.” Nate shook his head. “Never thought I’d see that happen. Of course, it wasn’t that long ago I was just a guy who cut open dead people for a living. Didn’t think I’d ever be the Pale Horseman either.” He stared into the distance for a few short breaths before his eyes widened and he looked at me in a panic. “Oh, no. What’s Leah going to say when she finds out?”

  “Well, considering you’re going to bring home your daughter, I hope she has a lot of good things to say.” My words didn’t seem to put Nate at ease, but they did give him something else to focus on other than his marriage.

  The front door opened again, and Emma came back in carrying a gym bag over one shoulder. She paused to look around. “Where’s Laz?”

  Nate frowned at me. “He’s still here. I guess I just need to recharge him so he’ll stay visible.”

  “Save your strength for now. Look what the cat dragged in,” she said and gestured behind her.

  Khaleda marched through the door, and my jaw almost hit the floor in true cartoon fashion. Not only had she had time to recharge her powers by feeding on some poor, unsuspecting schmuck, but she’d apparently also found time for a wardrobe change. Normally, Khaleda’s fighting outfit was a modified leather catsuit with lots of space for storing weapons. She’d traded that for a polished black breastplate with blood-red straps and a flowing cape with trim the same color. Bands of steel armor covered her shins and forearms while another band, this one made of gold, circled her fore
head. A collection of throwing knives rested in a belt around her hips where she also had two swords strapped.

  Finn gave a low whistle, which drew a warning stare from Remy. “What?” he protested and gestured to her. “Look at her! She’s super-hot!”

  “She’s your aunt!”

  “Give the kid a pass on this one,” Ulmir said. “He’s not wrong.”

  Khaleda ignored them both. “I see the rest of you are still just laying about. Meanwhile, I’ve ordered my troops through the portal toward the rendezvous point. We should go, or we’ll miss all the murder and mayhem.”

  “You mean liberating Faerie,” Remy corrected.

  The succubus shrugged. “Same difference.”

  Emma dropped her gym bag on the bar. “When the city went on lockdown, I raided Grammy’s emergency stash and added it to mine, just in case. I brought everything because I wasn’t sure what everyone would want.”

  She opened the bag and started taking guns out. At first, it was just small guns, regular pistols. The more she pulled out, though, the bigger they got. By the end of it, she had at least a dozen handguns, two rifles, and a pump-action shotgun.

  “I have ammo too,” she offered. “A lot of ammo. Oh, and there’s a grenade launcher in the car, but it’s got a Hello Kitty emblem on it.”

  Nate frowned. “Emma, why do you have a Hello Kitty grenade launcher?”

  She shrugged. “I saw it and I wanted it, so I bought it.”

  “If I wasn’t a disembodied soul, I’d be so turned on right now,” I said.

  Khaleda wrinkled her nose. “Gross.”

  Ulmir laughed and rubbed his meaty hands together. “I’ll take it.”

  “But you’re fae,” Emma said.

  “I’m a dwarf. A little iron never hurt me. Give us the big gun. I’ll put some holes in the walls for you.”

  I nodded, and Khaleda shrugged. “Laz says do it.”

  Finn finished his drink and hopped down from the bar. “Well, I think we’re about as ready as we’re going to get. Shall we go win you your kingdom back, Queen Remy?”

  Remy took a deep breath, stood up straight, and nodded.