A Dish Best Served Cold

by T J Reeder

  Beth locked the breaks up and cut the wheel and slid to a stop in front of us. She bailed out and arms around my neck jumped up and wrapped her legs around me and said “ I’ve been bad daddy you need to spank me and laughed so hard she needed a pat on the back, they other two were standing there one on each side of the gun leaning on the roll bar with dirty faces and big smiles.

  God knows they are wild and crazy and may kill themselves at any moment but they will die laughing and trying to out do each other. I sat Beth down and said ok bail out you witches I wanna try it! Ralph was handing them belts of ammo when I climbed in. Beth got behind the wheel and after I was in the makeshift harness off we went, Sandy sitting with Beth in front and May standing by me to feed the belts.

  We roared down a dry wash and May pointed out the rocks that were pockmarked from their other runs, I opened fore and went wild! Before I knew it I was out of ammo, three full belts worth, May was a damn good ammo man, she linked the belts together while maintaining her balance and feeding the belt.

  We rolled back to the hanger which is a brush arbor and parked in time to be greeted by Harv with a bucked of cold beer, even the girls had one, Beth took some of mine then snagged a drink from her “ Sisters” or “co-wives” whatever. Sandy said get your own but Beth said this way I’m not really drinking I’m just sipping, Sandy smiled and said well shit have another sip!

  God they are a riot, tomorrow the jeep would be today’s toy and they would be getting into something else.

  I told them about the frozen busted beer and how that project was going, May, ever the engineer said well stack the beer close to the door and up on a shelf where the temp will be higher, I could only shake my head, so simple it takes a PHD to figure it out in 1.02 nano seconds.

  I could see I was gonna steal the information and look really good when I figured out the solution to the problem. But I forgot Harv was standing there, another good chance shot in the ass.

  I told them after they cleaned the gun and put it away and turned the brass and links over to the two old armory farts they could come have another beer, they said since I shot it last I could clean it, I reminded them I was the Elder and the Husband and the General! And got pelted with empth and not so empty beer cans. No respect. I helped them with the gun since none of them knew shit about it except load and shoot, that part they had down pat.

  It was bum at the fires night so off we went, our donation was buckets full of very cold beer, we were greeted with cheers. Life is good in the canyons, have I mentioned that?

  That evening before dark we walked up to the castle in the ridge and walked thru it. To say it’s beautiful would be an unforgivable mistake, it’s beyond that mere word. And it’s just a few days from being ready to move into, there are things like water but they have a plan, also furniture but they have another plan, and some lighting of some kind and they don’t have a plan for that. They say I need to contribute something to the place so lights is my thing. Sigh.

  We headed down to the camper and got our shower stuff since we were covered with dust from Rat Patrolling and off we went.

  Showering in a big shower room with several different heads is nice except they all have to crowd under the same one, but it makes showering very interesting.

  We used the propane stove in the trailer to make coffee and settled down for the night. Walker was crushing something in his jaws, Since the boys have been restricted from hunting within half a mile it opened up prime hunting for Walker, he don’t comprehend the term “Half Mile Safety Zone”. I went to sleep with my coffee on my chest and felt the cup being removed from my hand and that’s all I knew until daybreak.

  I woke up with one warm body in my arms, it’s fun to keep my eyes closed and to figure out who it is. Later Sandy and I joined the girls at the communal fires for breakfast. Oat meal with butter and brown sugar and a hand full of raisins for me, Beth and May will sometimes put raisins in their oat meal but Sandy will cut off her thumbs before she will eat one, she says they are decayed grapes which makes me laugh and the other people wanna stone her. Good breakfast talk!

  There is so much we need to start growing or trying to grow, grapes is one, and raspberry’s hell anything berry and fruit trees

  I guess we need a road that don’t involve killing people and burning down cities. A trip to gather things to grow, create life instead of taking it. I decide to have a talk with our resident green thumb, a lady named Mable. She’s black as the inside of a chunk of coal and has the greenest eyes I’ve ever seen, like a panther I guess, We got her away from slavers and she stepped right into the life style.

  She had many suitors but seemed to be waiting for Mr. right, she said she had a couple of Mr. wrongs and wasn’t going down that road again. She can grow anything so I’m gonna ask her, Beth came along with me but I told the girls they could jeep all they want but no more running thru 10,000 rounds of ammo.

  They fooled me, they were heading to the reloading dump to help reload their recovered brass. I reminded them that powder and primers and bullets aren’t being made these days.

  It’s a waste of time because they got an entire truck load from Barstow. I’m not sure what all they have since they are pretty close mouthed about it. “Their Trucks” are parked and covered and the mech crew in fear of their lives haven’t allowed anybody near them.

  Beth and I found Mable in her garden, talking to her plants, she also sings to them. We all love our Mable. She could make a rock smile.

  She took a break in the shade of a tree she waters every day and it looks like it’s happy as a clam at high tide. I explain what I’m thinking and she shakes a finger at me and says “Ain’t nothing like a good man finding out he gonna be a daddy to make him start paying attention to real life.” Beth laughed and I said “Oh shit Mable knock off the Aunt Jemima routine” which cracks her up but she settles down and then talks like the very well educated lady she is.

  She did say again that she was glad I was thinking with the big brain for a change, I sighed. Then we got down to it, she already had a list she had been planning to talk to me about between city burnings ( ha ha ha still being funny) She went for the list and showed me and I handed it to Beth who looked it over real close and asked a lot of questions about “Will this grow here?” or wow it would be great to have these growing!!

  My two bits worth was ok, lets go find this stuff, Mable said have you bothered to ask that bunch of land pirates hanging out in that prison? Head slap and a quiet under the breath “shit” ( stop cussing!!) Shut up!! ( giggles).

  Mable said them girls gonna drive you crazy if you don’t clean up your act John! I looked funny I guess and she said John everybody here know they in your head, My god boy when you gonna smarten up? Beth laughed and I sighed. I don’t understand it I said. Mable said well no shit John, nobody else do either but it don’t change a thing. I said uh your slipping back into the Auntie J routine again. She laughed and said sorry John but I love jerking your chaine too.

  So I was gonna get on the radio and see if we had any seed and other garden stuff. Mable said come on I’ll go along coz sure as god done made dem lil green apples you gonna screw it up, I swear white folks is sumptin else.

  Beth was laughing so hard she had tears, I was worried about her tummy jiggling too much for the baby. She patted my hand and said chill out white boy then her and Mable were off laughing again.

  Well once again I’m proving I’m not a leader. Not only is there like a ton of seeds at the fort, they have every fruit tree they can find planted and growing, I asked about winter and they said “ Uh green houses duh? I said we would be there tomorrow and signed off. I was feeling pretty stupid but Mable said John you have life and death problems facing you almost daily, how are you gonna think of everything?

  With those words ringing in my head I put out the word to all the people in all canyons to come to a feed and a meeting, then informed the ladies we were hosting a meal this evening. I think a few years ago they would ha
ve killed me, now they just wondered off talking about who was gonna do what. I really can’t believe the change in all of us.

  By late afternoon everybody was drifting in on boats of every type even those amusement park paddle boats where you sit and peddle like a bike. We find fun where we can.

  After we had eaten I stood up and explained how the day went with the gardening thing and how Mable had wanted to do this but didn’t mention it and I wanted to avoid this in the future, I explained that no one person can be in charge of everything and we needed a central place for people to bring their wants and needs or ideas so we could get to it.

  Beth spoke up and said since she was going to be moving slower pretty soon she would be the central fixer and that all they had to do was write it out and “FAK” it. That got their attention. She smiled and said “ Write it out and “ Find a Kid!” send it to me and I’ll get to working on it. Everybody was laughing and talking about “FAKing” but it made sense, the kids were all over the place so one could run or boat a message easy. And just like that another problem solved. By Mable and Beth.

  We sat around and shared some cold beers and talked until it was just light enough for folks to get home before dark, goodbyes and they were off.

  The girls were excited about learning to load ammo but they said they get it on wasting it after a day of working the presses.

  The girls headed for the camper and I sat with Joe and Willy for a while talking about nothing, Willy is worried about the plague, Joe’s wife told him today she’s gonna have a baby! Her and Beth about the same time, I asked why he was just telling us and he said they just wanted to have it to themselves a while. Me and Willy laughed at him but we both shook his hand. I swear he was red in the face.

  I guess I would have been but I was out for three days and got the news as a jilt to wake me up. But I knew how he felt, so I said Joe don’t worry, the world went to hell but we are rebuilding it and can you think of a better place to bring a baby into the world then right here? He agreed and did look relieved.

  I headed to the camper and wondered where I was gonna sleep since they were sprawled all over the bed but they did let me squeeze in. I waited a bit and said “ Joes gonna be a daddy. It was quiet for a moment and all three sat right up and turned on the 12 volt light and started pounding on me asking why I hadn’t said anything, I said coz I found out five minutes ago! Jeeze.

  Now sleep was set aside for plans for a “ baby coming party” I went to sleep, and woke up alone, I mean really alone, and feeling a bit hurt about it, then the door flew open and they all jumped on the bed and talking at once never noticed I was there. I thought of those old kings who had a hundred wives and five hundred concubines and wondered how they did it, They lived else where that’s how!

  We had to get moving because we were going garden shopping today so while I hooked up the gooseneck they went after Mable and then I realized we needed more room so Sandy and May said they would drive the jeep! Mable said she wanted to ride in the jeep so off we went, I made them stay in front of us so I could keep an eye on them. But they fooled me coz I saw May stand up and reach over the seat and raise up the M-60 and place it on the roll bar while Beth laughed, I said they had this planned didn’t they? She said yep and she was sworn to secrecy. I sighed.

  As I watched Mable stood up and placed the harness around her waist and swung the gun back and forth but I could see there was no ammo in it but I’d bet there was a mile of belted 308’s in the Jeep. My sweet little loving wives were ahead of me as usual. Beth said they just wanted to show it off to the Fort people, that I could understand, what’s the sense of women getting shiny’s if they can’t show them off?

  But a fkn m-60 on a jeep? Why not a ring or some other girly bling? Beth scooted over and leaned against me and said John they are just living the life they never could have had the lights not gone out. I knew and I often wondered how with so much death and misery all over the world from our stand point it was an improved world? That seemed so wrong in so many ways.

  I used to say that when any species over bred it’s habitat that Mother Nature would solve the problem and that mankind was there and Mother Nature was gonna shake us off one day. But we did it to ourselves. And this plague might be the icing on the cake. Time would tell.

  We got to the Fort and were greeted as usual like we hadn’t just been there a while back, the girls headed off looking for the storage crew to show them the jeep while Beth and Mable got with Mr’ wipple as I can only think of him. He took his papers and off they went in the golf cart with me following along.

  Suffice to say we made a haul, we had every fruit and nut tree known to man with burlap covered root balls and a ton of garden tools and a ton of seeds of every kind on the frigging planet.

  Mable was smiling from ear to ear. We even got a couple of big roto tillers and the promise of a new John Deere tractor if we wanted it with all the tools for working land. This was turning into a lot of farm work and as I know I pointed out I’m not a farmer.

  Beth patted my arm and whispered calm down love, Mable is the farmer, let her run free! And run free she did! One one of her trips she threw her arms around me and said OH John!! Thank you thank you!!! I didn’t know what to say so I just hugged her back. And she was gone again.

  The girls came back grinning and I got worried but they were just proud that they had the idea of getting a towing hitch put on the jeep and had found a 12 foot trailer to help haul stuff, I swear they are growing up! ( HA!! Watch it buddy!) shit ( stop cussing!) sigh.

  We settled in for the day and had a great meal. Mable had toured the entire place and glanced at the piles of gold and other stuff but spent hours going thru the green houses and gardens, I could see the wheels turning and before I could say a word Sandy said Mable guess what!!!??? Mable just shook her head and May said tomorrow the storage guys will be bringing your green houses over and will help set them up! I swear Mable almost cried. It’s good to make people happy and Mable loved her gardening but knew she needed more and now she had it! I smile!

  Next morning at breakfast Mable said well that’s the first time I slept in a prison next to a gajillion dollars worth of gold! Sandy said OH? Did you miss all the silver and diamonds and other stuff too? Mable just shook her head and went back to eating.

  We rolled out followed by the storage guys driving a big diesel truck pulling a big trailer. When we got home they asked Mable where she wanted her garden shed? She asked what shed? That one pointing at the 40 ft box trailer, They said they were gonna take the wheels off and drop it onto some beams they had, leaving her a super shed! They worked it out and with everybody helping out we got it done before dark. We did have to unload it first and stack things out of the way. When we got the green houses out there stood a small garden tractor with all the goodies to work small truck gardens. It was a Kubota with a diesel eng. Gardening had just gotten easier!

  Standing aside I whispered to Beth that I thought there might be some romance going on as one of the guys was really taking an interest in Mable as well as her garden. Beth said yep she had seen that too.

  I knew Willard was married but Wilson wasn’t, so maybe. After they were done Mable invited them to her fire for supper and Wilson jumped at the offer while Wilber said he was going to visit a friend so we took off and left them alone.

  I for one hoped the smoke had a tiny bit of fire under it, the girls said they knew Mable would make the right decision and it was her business, I said ok, I’ll shut up getting me smiles.

  To make a long story short, Wilson stayed to help get the tractor set up and working then to get the green houses set up and never left. Well he did go back to get his personal stuff but Mable went with him and they brought back a lot of things to make their plans go better.

  Everybody was happy for them and two weeks later there was a wedding Canyon style and a feast. Life is pretty good here in the canyons in case I never mentioned that.

  Oh, a word on canyon style weddings,
the happy couple simply stand and pledge to love and honor each other until they can’t or they die. We all know nothing is permanent anymore and people can either live with each other or not, but nobody wants to remain in a relationship if they are unhappy and here it’s not necessary. Yet with the easy out things seem to last, I think because the only “issues” are maybe getting killed in a fire fight, everything else is pretty well nothing. Plus there isn’t the push to be successful, just remaining alive is success enough.

  Plus we are surrounded with people who are true friends and who are where they want to be. I guess or at least that’s what I think.

  The mechanics had worked on the cooling system and found a way to turn the temp up some so now the beer was cold and nothing was freezing.

  Now we could hang a beef or deer and just use it as we needed it, one of the guys had some abilities as a meat cutter so he would cut up the meat in the proper manner and put it in pans on the shelves, the cooks just went in and got what they wanted. It works so it’s good.

  We pitched in and helped Harvey’s clan and the Bremmers with building their cold storage and now everybody has cold beer! Well and meat kept fresh until it was eaten.

  Harvey’s building crew decided to build entry ways into the cold rooms so you can go in and shut one door then open another thus keeping the cold in and the heat out, great idea. I was thinking a room off the cold room maybe a cool room with comfy chairs would be nice, a great place to drink beer and nap.