Don't Let Go (Hope Harbor Book 3)

by Ann B. Harrison

  “But what if you decide you want more?” Everyone did eventually. It was how relationships worked in the real world.

  A shadow passed over his expressive blue eyes and she felt a twinge of regret. “If it’s not what you want, then that’s how we’ll play it.”

  “It’s not fair on you. I know you want more from me but I can’t give it to you.”

  He rubbed his thumb over her knuckles sending all kinds of signals to her gut. “I’m a big boy. Old enough to decide what I want. I want you, Aggie. Anyway I can get you.”

  She desperately wanted to say yes but something held her back. Fear.

  Chapter 7

  Aggie wasn’t surprised to hear the knock on the bakery’s back door. When Liam dropped her home last night, he’d hinted that he’d be back at the bakery to help her and she didn’t have the heart to tell him not to bother.

  The reason why she’d been alone for the last couple of years had left her on edge more than she’d like to admit, but there was no way she was going to tell the family that. They’d rush around and make a fuss, something she didn’t think she could bear. At least Liam was being more casual about it even though she knew it cost him dearly. She’d seen the look of longing in his eyes more than once.

  She unlocked the door. “Hey.”

  He came inside. “Hey, yourself. Glad to see the door’s locked this time.”

  When he leaned forward to give her a kiss, Aggie turned and headed into the back room, trying to act casual. Truth be told, having him in her space was making her more nervous than she’d felt in a long time. Not bad nervous, but nervous just the same.

  “So, what do you want me to do first?”

  “You don’t have to stay with me, Liam. I’ve done this for two years on my own.”

  He stepped closer and put his hands on her arms. “Yes, but you don’t need to live your life being afraid anymore. I’m happy to stay with you until that fear goes away. I told you that last night. I hate to see that haunted look in your eyes.”

  “Look, we can’t keep doing this. Seeing how we work as friends and hanging out is one thing; being my assistant baker is another. You have a business and nobody wants to see their doctor falling asleep on his desk. Your focus has to be on your patients.”

  “It’s the weekend and I don’t have to work anyway, so stop worrying about it. I can take care of myself. Speaking of which, Ben told me to encourage every lady on the island to sign up for his self-defense classes. He’s doing his bit to empower the goddesses of Hope Island. His words exactly.”

  Aggie grinned. Typical Ben speak. “He said that?”

  “He did. It’s wonderful that you’ve stuck the posters in your window, but I think he was hoping for more. Not sure if I explained it before, but the women’s shelter asked him to line something up and we discussed what we could do. He came up with what he hopes is the perfect fit for the local girls and ladies. If you could take a few classes, it would be encouraging for the other locals. At least, I think that’s the general idea.”

  “I doubt people will care what I do.”

  He rolled his eyes. “You’re part of the founding family of Hope Island—of course people care what you do. Tell Gigi as well. I’m sure it can’t hurt for any of you to do it. If nothing else, it’ll increase your fitness and it’s only for eight weeks. I think Ben’s hoping he’ll get more signups for the martial arts classes when folks find out how much fun it is. Not that it’s the reason he’s doing this. But you know how he loves his fitness regimen.”

  “Yeah, I do, and it works for him being the island’s cop. You still train, don’t you? After all these years, the joy of it hasn’t worn off?”

  “No. I love it. After a busy day it’s what I need to help me unwind. Great place to take out my frustrations too. A punching bag isn’t judgmental.”

  Aggie tucked a strand of hair under her white baker’s cap. “I’ll think about it.”

  Liam grinned. “Awesome. But back to you. Once I see you feeling safe and happier, then I’ll let you work alone. Besides, you do have Lauren. When she’s here, I’ll sleep. Now, where do I start?”

  He got points for being as stubborn as she was. Still, it didn’t make it any easier for her to ignore him around when he was being so nice to her.

  “Let’s do the basic breads, and then I’m going to teach you how to make tiger bread. If you’re really good, we’ll make my famous tarts.”

  “Tiger bread? You mean you do stuff with stripes?” He glanced at the empty shelves as if looking for something to give him a hint as to what she meant.

  “Nope. Special recipe I found for making the most delicious crunchy topping ever. Easy as pie.”

  “Do I get to sample said loaf?”

  Her lips twitched. “Maybe.”

  Liam rubbed his hands together. “Right. Let’s get going then.”

  Aggie handed him an apron, doing her best to keep the smile from her face.

  * * *

  On Monday morning, Liam put the iced buns and a fresh loaf of tiger bread on the break room table and stifled a yawn.

  “You’re going to have to stop bringing goodies or I’ll blow up like a balloon.” April peeked into the bags and sighed. “I really don’t need these calories before the wedding.”

  “How much weight can you put on before the big day?”

  “You have no idea.” She sighed and rubbed her belly. “Thirteen days. Heck, that’s gone fast.”

  “It has but once it’s over, it’ll be worth what little stress it’s been.”

  April laughed. “Oh, I’m not stressed. Drew’s the one who’s panicking over every little thing. Who would’ve guessed he’d turn out to be the worrier?” She resolutely scrunched the bag back up and pushed it away.

  “I know. But add the baby into the mix and it’s no wonder he’s driving everyone crazy.”

  The man himself walked into the room. “Stop exaggerating. I’m not driving anyone crazy. I’m as calm as anything.”

  Liam and April shared a look and both raised their eyebrows at the same time.

  Drew wasn’t amused. “I saw that. More to the point, what’re your plans with my sister? And how long do you think you can keep up this double shift nonsense without falling asleep in your office?”

  Liam poured himself a cup of coffee. This morning, he’d managed three hours of sleep before dragging himself out of bed. He felt better than he did yesterday. Perhaps his body was becoming used to it. He’d read it took two weeks to recalibrate a person’s sleep patterns, and over the last week he’d spent more nights awake than asleep.

  He’d had horrible flashbacks of when he was an intern. Reminded him of being the lowest of all doctors in the hospital. They got the shitty shifts and the least sleep. He wondered what patients would think if they knew some of the doctors looking after them back there were so short on sleep that their mental acuity and reaction speed would register as bad as someone with a high alcohol level.

  “Well?” Drew prompted.

  “Until Aggie calms down and loses some of her anxiety.”

  “She’s been like that for two years, Liam. What makes you think you can change her?”

  “Ben has started a self-defense class and I’m hoping Aggie will take it. Might make her feel a bit more confident. Until then, I’ll be there for her.” He stared at Drew. “I’ve put up posters in reception, so if you get anyone asking about them, please be encouraging and try to get as many women to sign up as you can. I’ll tell Natalie too.”

  “Sure thing. Now back to my sister.”

  April raised her eyebrows and left the room.

  “She’s no help. My own dear wife-to-be, who knows what’s going on, seems to find it easy to slide out of the conversation at the most inappropriate time. She could save us all a lot of angst if she’d just tell us what she knows.” Drew grabbed a cup for himself and filled it from the pot.

  “You can’t blame her. I’d probably keep your secrets too. In fact, I have in the past.
”

  Drew scowled. “But this is different. It’s my sister we’re talking about.”

  “Probably all the more reason why Aggie doesn’t want you to know.”

  Drew paused mid sip. “What? Are you telling me that even if you find out what her issue is, you won’t tell me?”

  Liam thought about it for a moment. What if he did find out what was bothering Aggie and she made him promise not to tell? Would he risk it by telling Drew? Not likely. “Depends on what Aggie wants.”

  “Not sure I like that idea.” The corners of Drew’s lips turned down in a show of displeasure. “But, if you can make her happy, I guess I’ll have to suck it up.”

  Chapter 8

  The wedding day dawned bright and sunny, but Aggie woke with a pounding stress headache. She rolled over in bed and stared at the ceiling. April would be waiting for her but the last thing Aggie wanted to do was go and start making preparations without getting her head in the right place.

  Her bestie deserved every bit of happiness she could get, but it was going to take Aggie a moment or two to gather enough calm to put on her happy face. She wasn’t feeling jealous exactly, but more a deep pain that Aggie would never be able to expect the same level of love her best friend did. It left her a little bit anxious.

  The worst thing was that there wasn’t anyone she could talk to about it without telling them the whole story and that wasn’t going to happen. For the last two weeks she’d been tempted to talk to Liam about it but stopped herself just in time. It was amazing how easily they’d fallen back into their old routine, like they’d had before they’d left the island. She enjoyed having him with her and it would be too easy to get used to that.

  Totally unfair to him of course. He had his own job and despite his protests that he was fine, the dark shadows had started to show under his eyes. After the wedding was over, she’d tell him to stop coming. It was time to face her own fears. But not quite yet.

  A knock sounded on her door and then her aunt poked her head in. “I’m making you coffee so let’s get moving. April wants us at the house in just under an hour. Your beauty sleep is over.”

  Aggie groaned. She could do this. It wasn’t a big deal. A wedding. One day only. It wasn’t a lifetime commitment for her. Just get a grip and move yourself. She stumbled out of bed and went searching for the promised coffee.

  As if by autopilot, she drank the coffee, had a shower, and dressed in casual clothes while her aunt fussed around her. By the time they got to April’s house, her head was pounding. It wasn’t until she was dressed and ready that the girls had a private chance to talk.

  “You’ve got this. Stop looking so worried.” April stroked a curl behind Aggie’s ear.

  “Aren’t I supposed to be the one telling you to calm down?” Aggie’s nerves were shot. All she wanted to do was run a mile. Spending time with Liam in the bakery was one thing but at the wedding, where everyone was high on love, was a different matter. So many things could go wrong, including letting her defenses down.

  What if she forgot to be wary of him and enjoyed herself? In front of everyone! They’d all see it and get excited for her. Aggie knew her family and how they operated. Just look at how they’d ‘helped’ Hilary hook up with Arlo. Poor guy didn’t stand a chance once Gigi and Matt gave her a helping hand. Not that her brother was complaining now, but happy ever after wasn’t on Aggie’s radar. She knew better than to risk her heart and fall for Liam.

  Plus, if news of what happened to her got out, how could she call a halt to the relationship? And how would everyone else take it when she back pedaled? She’d come across as a real bitch. And even if she wanted to keep her distance from Liam, Aggie didn’t want him to think she couldn’t manage her own feelings. That would only complicate matters.

  “Normally, yes. But I’m good. It’s you I’m worried about.” April gave another glance in the mirror and adjusted the flowers in her hair. “I know you’re nervous.”

  “Don’t worry. I’ll be fine. I won’t let you down.” She swallowed, the panic bubbling slowly in her gut. Too many people and too many emotions. It was all going to send her into a meltdown if she didn’t stop and breathe.

  April turned and grabbed her hand. “Listen to you. It’s not a case of letting me down. I want you to enjoy the day. Nothing you do will make me love you any less. And I’m sorry being dragged you into my wedding makes you so stressed out. You don’t need to be. Liam will be there to look after you.” She smiled. “You know you can trust him, right?”

  Like she’d trusted him every night he’d helped her at the bakery? Yeah, the good times when she almost believed anything was possible when deep down, Aggie was just waiting for it to all explode in her face. It was only a matter of time until he found out what had happened to her.

  “Yeah, I know I can.”

  April smoothed down her hair and poked in another hair pin. “He told me about the classes Ben is running. You’re going to sign up, right?”

  “What is it with everyone wanting me to learn to defend myself?” She spat the words out before thinking, and only when a shadow crossed over April’s eyes did Aggie kick herself. Of course April would want her to do the class. It made sense. Even to her own stubborn mind it seemed logical.

  She’d given it plenty of thought over the last couple of weeks too. A few customers had asked about it when they came into the shop and said they were keen to sign up. They seemed to take it for granted that Aggie would be there since the sign was in her window.

  Really, what could it hurt? It might make her feel less nervous and give Liam a break from keeping her company at night. Not that she needed him there as much as he thought she did. Still, it was nice to know someone had her back. How far she could take that was the question.

  “Here’s Dad. You’d better get this started. I doubt Drew will appreciate being kept waiting.”

  Her father stood at the open door and stared at them with misty eyes. “Ladies, ay I say how stunning you both are.”

  Aggie nodded. “Is Deacon here waiting?”

  “He certainly is. Horses look so pretty all dressed up in their finery. They’ve both got ribbons in their tails and manes.” He stepped forward and held out his hands to both of them. “But not as beautiful as you two ladies. I’m truly blown away.”

  Aggie swallowed down her nerves but smiled anyway.

  “Guess we’d better get going or my son is going to be sending out the troops to find us.” He held both arms out for the girls to link theirs through. “Shall we?”

  * * *

  “Holy shit.” Liam was lost for words when the music started and Aggie stood at the door of the little stone church. His throat closed up. His stomach did a double somersault.

  “Man, you really do have it bad.” Drew leaned over his shoulder, and they watched her walk step by step down the aisle toward them.

  “Oh man. She’s gorgeous.” In her bridesmaid dress and with her hair and makeup done, she looked nothing like the Aggie he knew who had flour in her hair, cheeks flushed from the hot oven and hard work. This woman was all style and charm. The two sides of her made up the complete package he wanted permanently in his life. He couldn’t let her go without a good fight.

  “You really are gone on her, aren’t you?”

  Why it came as such a surprise to Drew, Liam would never know. He’d always been sweet on Aggie. Everyone knew that. As she walked down the aisle toward him, he barely managed to get the word out. “Yeah.”

  The tone of the music changed as Aggie took her place beside Liam and April appeared at the door on Atticus Hope’s arm. With no family of her own, it had seemed perfectly appropriate for Drew’s father to walk her down the aisle to stand beside her future husband.

  “Man, oh man. Here she is.” Drew sucked in a breath, but Liam only had eyes for Aggie standing beside him. And she blushed delightfully under his scrutiny despite the panic filling her eyes.

  He slid his hand down to hers and clutched her fingers.
“I’ve got you, Aggie. You’re safe with me. Just relax and enjoy the day.”

  She gave him a quick glance and then pulled her hand away, turned to April and waited to take the bride’s bouquet.

  Throughout the service, Liam kept his eye on her and watched the emotions running over her face. She went from joyful to despondent in minutes then back to happy. But he couldn’t deny the dreamy look on Aggie’s face as Drew and April said their vows.

  “April, I love you. To me, you are the most perfect woman in the world and I’m humbled that you have chosen me for your husband. I promise to love you, honor you, and take care of you until death do us part. You are my everything.” Drew raised a finger and stroked it softly down her cheek.

  “Drew. You are my everything. You’ve given me and my children something I didn’t think possible—unconditional love. I adore you and I can’t think of anyone I’d rather spend the rest of my life with. I promise to honor you, love you, and walk toward the golden sunset of our days together. I want you to be the first person I see when I wake in the morning and the last I see when I go to sleep. You complete me.”

  Liam stifled a sniff beside Aggie.

  It wasn’t until Father Richards pronounced them husband and wife that Aggie let out a shuddering breath and her shoulders relaxed.

  April reached for her flowers and winked at Aggie before taking her husband’s arm. “Thanks.”

  Drew gave his new bride a huge grin and started walking her down the aisle to the applause of everyone present.

  “Okay now?” Liam touched Aggie’s arm.

  Aggie gripped her bouquet tight, the lack of blood leaving her knuckles white. “Yeah. That was pretty intense.”

  “You did great. Now the fun begins. Let’s get ready to party.” Liam took her hand and followed the bride and groom out of the church, standing back far enough not to get caught up in the confetti. “I’ll give you a lift to the reception after we do the photos. You and I are following the bride and groom for a few wedding party shots, then Drew and April will have a private session. I promised Drew I’d look after you.”