Forbidden Hunger (Forbidden #8): Siya & Ram

by R. L. Kenderson

  It wasn’t a threat; she was only trying to make a point. But Saxon must’ve taken it as one because he started growling low in his throat.

  Demi put her hand on her mate’s arm. “Saxon, Siya didn’t mean it that way.” She moved closer to him and lowered her voice. “She just doesn’t want to sleep in Ram’s room.”

  Saxon was a great sentinel, from what Siya had heard, and he loved Demi very much, but relationships were not his forte. Because he opened his mouth and said, “Why? I thought she liked him?”

  Ram shifted beside Siya, and she began to regret her decision to come and stay with the cat-shifters. The amount of humiliation she felt at that moment was probably way worse than letting Ram drink her blood.

  Meanwhile, Demi hadn’t given up on trying to explain the situation to Saxon. She sighed and whispered in his ear.

  Siya couldn’t hear what was being said, but that didn’t mean Ram couldn’t. His hearing was far better than hers, and she feared that she was going to have to bury herself in a hole to hide for the rest of her life.

  Saxon leaned back. “What the fuck?”

  “Now, do you understand?” Demi asked.

  “Yeah. But you’re still sleeping with me.”

  Demi put her head in her hand and shook it. “You make my life very difficult.”

  Saxon grinned at her.

  Demi turned away from her mate and back to Siya with sad eyes. “I’m sorry. I tried.”

  As a human, Siya thought Demi should’ve stood up to her mate more, but she understood that cat-shifters had different relationships. Plus, while Demi didn’t want her to suffer, she probably still wanted to sleep next to her mate at night.

  Siya understood. If she had a mate who looked at her the way Saxon looked at Demi, she’d want to sleep next to him, too.

  But that still left Siya wondering what to do.

  Maybe I should get out of town for a while.

  Saxon looked at her as he put his arm around Demi. “Yeah, sorry, Siya.”

  Demi smacked his chest. “No, you’re not.”

  Saxon chuckled. “You’re right. I’m not sorry. But I do feel bad. However, you have no better protector than Ram. Not only did Vance assign him to take care of you, but also, Ram actually wants to. And the fact that he doesn’t want to screw you will only help you stay safe.”

  “Oh, Saxon,” Demi groaned and pinched her nose.

  “What? It’s true,” the male shifter said.

  Siya wanted to disappear right about now. The heat from embarrassment flooded her face, and she had no doubt that Ram noticed it. Usually, her dark complexion covered up her blushing pretty well, but Ram had once told her that as a vampire, he could sense the blood flowing into her cheeks.

  She needed some fresh air.

  “Excuse me,” she muttered and hurried outside.

  Not wanting to face anybody, not even Demi, she took off for the trees before her best friend could come after her. Thankfully, the sun was up, so she didn’t have to worry about Ram coming outside. She simply needed to be alone for a few minutes.

  She found a tree under some shade and sat down on the ground to lean against it. She closed her eyes and tried to think happy thoughts. She pictured the last time she had gone to visit her parents in India. She never had any urge to move there. Her parents had immigrated before she was born and then moved back several years ago now that their parents were getting older. But right now, she missed her mother, even when she constantly asked when Siya was going to find a nice Indian boy to marry.

  She snorted at the thought of her mother meeting Ram, a vampire.

  Her eyes flew open, and she sighed.

  She had done a good job of forgetting about him the last few months, and she didn’t pine for him, but it sure had been humiliating for Saxon to tell everyone that she liked him and that he didn’t like her, especially when she had liked him. Had. As in the past.

  She was already a human, which made her feel inferior. She didn’t need everyone to feel sorry for her because of this, too.

  She sensed someone even before she heard them getting closer. She figured it was Demi and lifted her head to tell her friend she needed a few more minutes, but it wasn’t Demi.

  It was Ram.

  Siya scrambled to her knees. “What are you doing out here?”

  He sat down beside her and pulled up the bill of the baseball cap he was wearing. He was also covered in clothes from head to toe, but she didn’t know how well that blocked out the sun. “I came to check on you.”

  Hope rose inside her even though she hadn’t wanted it to. Is he worried about me?

  “You shouldn’t be out here alone. I doubt Monica would dare come this close to our home, but you shouldn’t take any chances.”

  And poof. Just like that, her hope was gone. He was worried about her but not in the way she wanted him to be. He was worried about her well-being, not how she felt. She had tried to tell herself to not get excited.

  All this did was tell her that maybe her feelings for him weren’t so in the past after all. Not that it really mattered. He didn’t like her, and everyone back inside knew it, too.

  Siya rolled her eyes. “Right now, you’re in more trouble than I am. You shouldn’t be out in the sun.” She lifted her chin. “You should go back inside.”

  “I’m not going to go until you do.”

  For the love…

  She was tempted to sit out there all day and let him suffer. But she’d have to suffer along with him.

  “Fine. We’ll go inside.” Hopping up from her spot on the ground, she took off, not bothering to wait for Ram.

  “Siya, wait.”

  She ignored him and kept going. He was a big, strong vampire. He could catch up to her without any trouble.

  And that was exactly what happened less than five seconds later.

  He grabbed her arm and spun her around. “What is your problem?”

  She scoffed. “My problem?” She clenched her jaw. “You men are all the same, no matter what species you are.”

  “What the hell does that mean?”

  Siya closed her eyes and drew from her nurse patience. What would she say if Ram were a patient? Taking a deep breath, she raised her eyes.

  Since everything was out in the open, there was no point in beating around the bush.

  “Not only have I been forced to leave my home with all my things, but I’ve also been forced to come and stay here with a bunch of strangers. Way too many strangers. Could you pack any more bodies into one house?”

  Ram scratched the back of his head. “Not everyone stays here all the time. Many have their own places. And they’re not strangers. You’ve already met everyone.”

  She would give him that. “Okay, you are right, but besides Demi, they are acquaintances at best. It’s still awkward, and it’s very hard to relax.”

  Ram’s voice lowered along with his eyes. “What about me? Am I just an acquaintance?”

  Siya crossed her arms over her chest. “No. You’re the guy who led me on—for who knows what reason—and then rejected me when I took you up on your offer.” She pointed toward the house as Ram’s head flew up. “And now, all those people in there, who I don’t know very well, know I was rejected. So, not only do I feel like a fish out of water, but I also feel like everyone pities me. It’s embarrassing.” She jerked her head in the way only a woman could. “Does that explain my problem well enough?”

  Ram just stared at her silently. She was so done with this conversation. She was going inside, and she’d look for Monica herself. The sooner that was figured out, the sooner she would get to go home.

  She turned to head inside, but Ram grabbed her wrist and yanked her toward him. She hadn’t been prepared and couldn’t stop herself from running into him.

  She looked up into his yellow eyes. They were so bright during the day, even shaded under a hat, and she almost forgot she was upset with him.

  “I didn’t reject you.”

  “Come on, R
am.”

  “I didn’t reject you,” he said again through clenched teeth.

  “It’s just you and me. You can admit it. No one is around to witness it. Besides, the damage has already been done.”

  That must have really pissed him off because he bared his teeth at her. He seemed so mad. He looked like he was going to yell at her, but he shocked her when he wrapped his arms around her and kissed her instead.

  Her lips parted of their own accord, and his tongue swept into her mouth, as if to claim it as its own. She whimpered and tried to lift her arms to reach for him.

  But that was as far as it went.

  Just as quickly as he’d grabbed her, he let go. “I didn’t fucking reject you.”

  And with that, he grasped her hand and led her back to the bunkhouse.

  Ten

  Ram stood in the doorway, watching Siya’s brow furrow as she concentrated on something on her laptop. She had her legs crossed underneath her as she sat on his big, stuffed chair. When he had gotten his own room, it was the first thing he’d bought since there was only one bed now. He loved that thing because it fit his body. She looked like she was drowning in it.

  It had been hours since he’d fetched her from outside. When he’d kissed her.

  He ran his thumb over his bottom lip, as if he could still taste her there.

  He should forget it’d happened.

  The two of them hadn’t said two words to each other since then. She’d gone right to his room and not come out since. He had tried to leave her alone as much as possible, but he needed sleep. He’d been awake for almost thirty hours, and the sun had stolen quite a bit of his energy.

  He was going to need blood soon. Normally, he could last another week or two, but after being outside so long, he was going to have to feed in the next couple of days instead.

  But that was something to worry about later. His body required rest first.

  Maybe he should have let someone else talk to her after she ran out of the house. Many had offered, but he had insisted it should be him. Either way, what was done was done. He couldn’t go back now.

  Ram cleared his throat from the doorjamb, and Siya’s head popped up.

  For a second, she looked like a deer caught in headlights, but it was gone before he could really assess it.

  “I need to sleep.” He looked at the bed. “Will that bother you?”

  She winced. “No, it’s fine. I should have known. It is daytime after all.” She closed her laptop and went to grab the notebook sitting beside her in the chair.

  He held out his hand. “You don’t have to get up. It won’t bother me if you stay.” He looked away, almost embarrassed to admit the next part. “In fact, it might be easier if you stay.”

  Siya bit her bottom lip as she considered it. “Are you sure?” she finally asked. “Because it’s kind of loud out there. It’s much quieter in here.”

  “I’m sure.” He pulled his shirt from over his head as he said, “All the rooms have some soundproofing. Not completely, but more than regular bedrooms. It can get pretty noisy otherwise.”

  “Huh?”

  He looked over at Siya. She looked lost in thought.

  “What did you miss?”

  She shook her head. “What? Oh. Nothing. Yes. Soundproofing. That makes sense.”

  Lifting his brow, he asked, “Are you okay?”

  “Yep. I’m just fine.”

  “Okay.” He turned his back, shucked off his pants, and flipped back the covers as a loud crash sounded behind him.

  He spun around, ready to fight anyone who might have broken in to hurt Siya.

  But she wasn’t in trouble. She was bent over, picking up her computer.

  “Sorry. It slipped off my lap.”

  He chuckled. “No worries.”

  A second later, it occurred to him that he was still naked, and now, his dick was facing her way. He quickly turned back around and got under the covers before she could see his junk.

  “Are you working on something?” he asked as he rolled onto his back.

  “Kind of,” she said. “But nothing for actual work. This is just for fun, I guess.”

  That reminded him…

  “When are you supposed to go to work again?”

  “Tomorrow.”

  He braced himself for what was going to come next. “You know that you can’t go back to work at this time, right?”

  She sighed. “Yeah, I know.”

  Ram was taken aback. “You do?”

  She smiled. “Yes. Even though I still think everyone is overreacting, Monica knows where I work now. I’m probably not safe there.”

  “Wow. I didn’t think you’d accept that so easily.”

  “Why? I’m not unreasonable.”

  “Yeah, it’s just that you insisted on finishing work last night.”

  “That’s because Monica would have been really stupid to come back last night. She had no idea who was waiting for her. And I’m sure she had other things to do once she escaped. Like taking Emery somewhere.”

  “I suppose that is true.”

  “Thanks, I think.”

  “What are you going to tell work?”

  “I already called them and told them something personal came up and I needed time off. I had to send out some text messages to get some of my shifts covered at the last minute, but I have PTO—paid time off—so they let me use it.”

  “That’s good.”

  “Yeah. It’s not really what I would like to spend my vacation time on, but here we are.”

  “We don’t have to stay in the house all the time,” he offered. “You can’t go out alone, but I’m willing to take you places.”

  She perked up. “Like my house?”

  He narrowed his eyes. “The last time you left when your life was in danger, your car blew up.”

  “Technically, yes, that was my car. But that bomb was meant for Demi.”

  “Still proves my point that someone can easily find where you live.”

  She sighed. “Yeah, you’re right.”

  “I promise we’ll keep you safe.”

  “I know. It’s just…I don’t think I’m in any real danger. It’s not like Monica let me know where she’s staying, and all her paperwork at the hospital was fake. Plus, I already told Vance, you, and the others about her. What would killing me do?”

  “She might do it out of retaliation. Revenge has no logic.” Ram cleared his throat. “Or she might not kill you.”

  Siya’s brow furrowed. “What would she do then? Just hurt me?”

  “She might kidnap you and use you.”

  A horrified look crossed her face, and then much to his surprise, she burst out laughing.

  Flying into a sitting position, he barked out, “Why is that funny?” Someone forcing her to have sex so they could make money made him sick.

  She bit her lip to stop herself from laughing and held out her hand. “I’m sorry.” She waved her arms back and forth. “And in no way am I laughing at the trauma Monica has caused anyone.” A sad look crossed her face. “In fact, I can’t get Emery out of my head. I wish I could have helped her.” She shook her head. “But I was given the backstory. She goes after young girls. Which makes sense. I’m way too old to be of interest to Monica or her clientele.”

  “You don’t know that. Not everyone likes barely out of their teens women.”

  “Yeah, well, I’m not even in my twenties anymore. Plus…”

  “Plus what?” he asked when he knew he shouldn’t have.

  “Plus, I’m not exactly the most beautiful woman in the world. I’m pretty, but I have big hips and a tummy. Monica would lose money, kidnapping me. I’d eat more than she’d make on me.” Siya started laughing again. “That would be kind of funny though.”

  He balled his comforter into his fist. “Enough.”

  She blinked at him a couple of times. “Excuse me?”

  “Stop talking about her kidnapping you. I—I can’t—I can’t handle it, okay?�
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  Her big eyes were wide now. “Okay.”

  “Thank you,” he said, exasperated.

  “You are one strange man.”

  “I’m not a man. I’m a vampire.”

  “Fine. You’re one strange male then.”

  “I’m not strange. I’m a vampire, and I don’t like the thought of my—” He clamped his jaw shut.

  Where the hell did that thought come from?

  Tilting her head to the side, she asked, “You don’t like the thought of your what?”

  He had actually thought, I don’t like the thought of my mate being kidnapped. But why that particular phrase had come into his mind, he didn’t know. They were so far from mates that it was almost funny.

  “Nothing.” He fell back down onto his bed.

  “Okay. Fine. But are you sure you don’t want to talk about it?”

  “No,” he said and rolled over, putting his back to her. “And you’re fucking beautiful, so stop saying you’re not.”

  “Yikes. You sure are moody.”

  Moody was an understatement. He was worried, he was horny, and he was mad that they didn’t know where Monica was. He was also tired. Hopefully, when he woke up, he’d be in a better mood.

  Eleven

  Hot. She was so hot.

  Raven shook off her sleep and kicked the covers off her overheated body. Next went her clothes, but it wasn’t enough. She was on fire, which meant only one thing.

  Her heat was here.

  She rolled over to grab her medicine off her nightstand, but it wasn’t close enough, so she scooted closer. She was almost there when a cramp in her womb caused her to seize up. She whimpered out at the severity of the pain.

  It had never been this bad. Not once, and she had been through this numerous times.

  She buried her nose in the pillow in hopes that the pain would pass enough for her to be able to move again, but a scent caught her attention.

  It was Ranulf, and she remembered him helping her to bed.

  Is that why I hurt so much?

  It seemed odd that his residual smell on her sheets would affect her that much, but another thought occurred to her.

  She forced herself onto her back and lifted her nose to the air.