The Howl (By Kiss and Claw Book 1)

by Melissa Haag

  “Mom?” I called softly.

  One of the men lifted his head.

  “Tell her I need her,” he said tiredly. “I ache for her. I need to please her and hear her sweet cries of pleasure.”

  I looked at him with pity.

  “I’ll tell her,” I said. “Go back to sleep so you’re ready for her when she returns.”

  He nodded and rested his head back on the woman’s thigh.

  Leaving them, I went downstairs and found Mom sipping coffee in the dining room. She gave me a small smile as I joined her at the table.

  “I thought I might need to corner you this morning to get you to talk to me after yesterday.”

  “No. I think I’ve been cornered enough, don’t you?”

  “You came home pretty late last night. Did you do anything interesting?”

  “I hung out with some friends. You know, healthy socializing.”

  “That’s great, darling. You look a bit more energized this morning. Did you feed while you were out?”

  The memory of last night’s dream rose to mind. I’d gorged on cakes in the woods again. I highly doubted that Mom would count that as feeding, though.

  “Speaking of feeding,” I said without answering her, “one of your humans is aching for you. He could barely keep his eyes open as he begged me to find you and ask you to return to him.”

  “Don’t worry. I told Anwen they were almost used up. She’ll find me some replacements today. This batch will be mind-wiped and returned to their lives.”

  My stomach turned at the thought. They’d go back to their lives but always feel like something was missing. They’d crave what they couldn’t even remember. I didn’t see how that was any better than what she’d done to my dad.

  “I love you, Mom. I just wanted you to know that,” I said, standing.

  “I love you too, baby. Everything I’m doing is because of just how much I love you. Do you want something to eat before you go?”

  She slid a plate I hadn’t noticed toward me. I glanced at the large slice of triple chocolate cake and shook my head.

  “Thanks, but I’m not really hungry. I better get going. I want to get to school early.”

  I went to the kitchen and made myself a quick sandwich for later then headed out the door.

  The pool was quiet when I entered the room and started across the tile. The humidity reminded me of the hot springs. Leaving the caves hadn’t been as fun as going to them. With wet hair and damp skin, it had been a trial to redress in the cold. My teeth had been chattering by the time I’d gotten my jeans up. Fenris had to help me with the button, but he hadn’t lingered or commented about my glowing line. I’d seen his amusement, though.

  He and Jenna had both offered to carry me back. But not trusting myself, I’d walked on my own. Overall, it’d been fun. And relaxing. It was definitely something I wouldn’t mind trying again. Alone.

  Drawing close to the bathroom door, all my tension returned. Doubt and fear pulled at me. Was I doing the right thing? I thought of the man in my mom’s room. If I didn’t stand up for what I wanted, how long would it be until I had an exhausted group of people in my bed?

  The druids looked up from their places on the floor when I entered. Ashlyn, who stood near the side, slightly hidden by the paper towel dispenser, waved at me.

  “Perfect timing,” the leader said. “We just finished setting everything up.”

  They’d drawn a circle of runes on the floor. I recognized a few of the gods’ symbols but nothing else. Just outside the runes, there were several bowls that held different objects. One looked like a bowl full of ash. I hoped it wasn’t human remains.

  “What do you need me to do?” I asked.

  “You and the human should stand off to the side.”

  “Ashlyn,” I said. “Her name is Ashlyn.”

  “Great. This is Meg—,” she pointed to thick hair, “—Anne—,” she indicated glitter makeup, “and I’m Lauv. We’ll do the spell, and when I point to you, you’ll need to speak your mother’s name. That’s it. Nothing to it.”

  “How many times have you successfully performed this spell?” Ashlyn asked.

  “More than a dozen times inside the barrier. Finding volunteers with a mark to travel outside the barrier is a little harder.”

  “So never?” Ashlyn pressed.

  “The spell is the same,” Lauv said. “It’s just the location that changes. Are you changing your mind?”

  Ashlyn and Lauv both looked at me.

  “No. I’m not changing my mind.”

  “Good. Ashlyn, you’re heavier than Eliana. Go stand against the door so no one interrupts.”

  Ashlyn moved past me, but not before giving me a warning look. That she was against what we were about to do was clear. That she was still here for me despite that fact said a lot.

  I took her spot by the paper towel dispenser and waited.

  The trio of druids positioned themselves so they were cross-legged, knee to knee within the circle. Lauv took a larger, empty metal bowl and set it in the center. Anne grabbed a handful of small twigs from outside the circle and placed it inside the empty bowl, starting a fire with a single word.

  They began chanting and speaking syllables that didn’t make sense to me. As they spoke, they added objects to the flames so that the color changed from orange to red to purple then blue.

  Then the chanting stopped, and Lauv nodded at me.

  “Wait, put the ash in,” Meg said.

  “The hell? Shut up,” Anne hissed.

  Meg grabbed the ash and tossed it into the flames. There was a burst of light, and Lauv gestured at me again.

  “Nicolette Lynn Barchim,” I said quickly.

  All three stared at the flames for several seconds.

  “It should have flared again, shouldn’t it?” Meg asked.

  “Who knows,” Anne said. “You opened your noisemaker when you weren’t supposed to. You know how exact these things are.”

  “So it didn’t work?” I asked.

  Lauv shrugged.

  “We won’t know until we know, you know?”

  I wanted to roll my eyes at her. Instead, I looked at Ashlyn to see what she thought. However, the space by the door was empty.

  “Where did Ashlyn go?” I asked, looking around the bathroom.

  “She probably bailed when the flames started turning colors,” Lauv said. “Most humans don’t like magic. Weirds them out.”

  “She was born and raised here. I doubt she was weirded out,” I said, already sending her a text asking where she was. “How do we know if the spell worked?”

  “Call your mom,” Anne said.

  “Don’t be stupid,” Meg said. “If she calls her mom just after her mom is transported, her mom is going to know it was her.”

  “You’ll find out when you go home tonight,” Lauv said. “Until then, play it cool and don’t acknowledge us if you see us in the hallways. Got it?”

  “Yeah, sure.”

  I left the bathroom while they were still cleaning up the remnants of the spell. There were more mermaids in the pool now, but none of them paid me any attention as I hurried away.

  The halls were only slightly crowded as I made my way to the first-hour session. A few people gave me disappointed looks, but no one commented on my clothes or lack of makeup. I’d never been more grateful to resume my unremarkable existence.

  Sliding into my chair, I waited for Lucas to begin the Human Studies lecture. Yet, it was hard to remain focused on his words once he started. My mind kept going to Mom, wondering if she was standing outside the barrier in her robe. I hadn’t thought about that and hoped she wasn’t cold. Surely, the liaison would notice her on her rounds and give her a ride somewhere. What if the liaison reported what happened to the Council and the Council invited Mom back in?

  I wanted to groan and hoped that wouldn’t happen. It would unlock a new level of hell in my life. There’d be an investigation. I’d have to come forward just to protect
the druids. I should have listened to Ashlyn.

  No. I’d done the right thing.

  My mind went back and forth the remainder of the hour. When the bell rang, I was the first one to escape the room. I needed to talk to Ashlyn.

  However, when I entered the self-paced study’s room, Ashlyn wasn’t there.

  Yanet was, though. She watched me enter with a slight look of disappointment.

  “I made you something,” she said, reaching into her pocket. She withdrew a diamond ring.

  “I can’t take that, Yanet.”

  “I know. Just thought I’d show it to you in case you wanted to go home and put something nicer on.”

  “Um, no. I think I’ll stay like this. Thanks.”

  Her gaze swept me head to toe, and she stuffed the ring back into her pocket. It was almost laughable if it wasn’t so sad. Her attitude wasn’t solely the fault of the clothes and makeup I’d been forced to wear. A good portion of what she’d felt had been from me. My natural lure had kicked in with the right clothes. The same lure that should have kicked in last night when I’d been with Fenris. Was he actually immune?

  The bell rang, and I turned to the front of the room.

  Ashlyn still wasn’t there.

  A thread of worry wormed its way into my middle and only grew as the minutes slowly ticked by without any word from Ashlyn. I needed to talk to those druids and figure out what they’d done. Ashlyn didn’t just not show up. Okay, she’d done it once, but she’d left a note that time.

  I could feel my panic spiraling, and I was once again the first one out of the room when the bell rang. I jogged through the halls, threading my way through my peers while looking for any of the three druids. The halls started to clear without any sign of them.

  Ignoring the bell, I went back to the pool bathroom. It was empty. I hurried out, ignoring the heckling calls of the mermaids, and went to my third-hour session, unsure what to do.

  I opened the door to a nearly empty room. Fenris straightened in his chair at the sight of me.

  “Didn’t think you were going to show,” he said.

  “What? Why?” I asked. Could he smell the smoke on me? Did he know what I had done?

  He grinned.

  “Relax. Your heart is going to jackrabbit right out of your ribcage. Last night was no big deal, and I’m glad you’re not avoiding me because of it.”

  “Right. Last night.”

  I realized he was talking about how I’d almost fed from him and quickly took my seat.

  “So, what are we supposed to be doing today?” I asked, changing the subject.

  He shrugged.

  “Discovering ourselves, I guess. How are you feeling? You look a little flushed.”

  “I’m fine. How are you?”

  He leaned back in his chair and considered me.

  “What’s going on? You weren’t this tense even before the hot springs.” He started to look troubled. “Did something happen that you didn’t want to happen? Something we should talk about?”

  I swallowed hard against the fear squeezing my throat.

  He knew.

  Chapter Seventeen

  “Look, I’m sorry about last night, but you looked miserable.” He leaned forward in his seat, almost angrily. “And I couldn’t just leave you alone like that. I had to stay and help you. I needed to.”

  Of course. Last night. I wanted to smack my forehead. Instead, I took a calming breath and offered him a grateful smile.

  “No, you were right. I did need the hot springs. And I’m sorry for what happened, but you were great. Not many people would have had the sense to turn me away like that.”

  “Hot springs. Right.”

  Confused by his annoyed tone, I watched him wearily lean back in his seat.

  “Is something wrong? Girl trouble?” I asked, realizing he might have problems of his own that he was dealing with.

  “You could say that. I don’t think this is the right time to talk about it, though.”

  “Okay.” I looked around the room, trying to think of a suitable subject change. One came to mind, and I wrinkled my nose.

  “Do I smell any different today?” I asked.

  His expression lost a little of its dejected cast.

  “Different how?”

  “You know, is the brownie batter smell gone?”

  A slow grin spread across his lips, and he crooked a finger at me.

  “Come on. Let me have a smell.”

  I got up and crossed to his desk. He turned in his seat and tugged me closer so I stood between his knees.

  “I could smell the soap when you walked in,” he said. “But is it covering up your little friend’s present, or did it remove it?”

  “Just get on with it already,” I said impatiently.

  His hands settled on my hips, and my pulse hitched. When he leaned in, my insides went hot. It was a dumb idea to have him smell me. As dumb as asking the druids to get rid of my mom. When was I going to learn?

  Yet, seeing his dark head so close to my chest made me hungry for so much more. I lifted my hand, itching to run my fingers through his hair.

  The door opened, and LuAnn poked her head in. Her glance caught it all. Fenris’s nose planted between my boobs. My hand hovering inches from his hair. My black eyes.

  “I wasn’t going to touch him,” I said quickly, pulling my hand back.

  “It’s okay if you do, dear. I’ll leave you two to it.”

  The door quickly closed.

  Face flaming, I glanced at Fenris. His grin was so wide I was pretty sure I could see his molars.

  “You weren’t going to touch me, huh?”

  “Shut up, Fenris.” If possible, my face grew warmer.

  “Oh, now I gotta know where.”

  “Nowhere.”

  I tried to step away, but his hands stayed firmly planted on my hips.

  “Hmm, let’s see. It’s snowing outside, and ‘tis the season...were you thinking of my jingle balls?”

  I wanted to disappear, but his hold wouldn’t allow that. Staring down into his thoroughly amused gaze, I wrinkled my nose at him.

  “I’d like to unfriend you now.”

  He laughed then leaned in to sniff my chest again.

  “It’s still there,” he said after a moment. “Try wiping it with lemon juice tomorrow. The acid might help cut some of the smell. And the glow.”

  He released me and leaned back.

  “This whole thing just made your day, didn’t it?” I said, noting his unrepentant grin.

  “You have no idea just how much.”

  “Well, I’m glad you’re amused.” I returned to my chair with a scowl. “No doubt LuAnn will report this to Adira, and that giant pain will find some new way to twist our lives around because of this.”

  “Would it be so horrible if she found ways for us to spend more time together?” he asked. Though he was wearing his usual smile, I could sense the hurt I’d inadvertently caused.

  “No. Of course not. I do like spending time with you, Fenris. I just don’t like being forced to do anything. No one does.”

  Once the bell rang and the distraction that was named Fenris wasn’t in the immediate area, I focused on finding Ashlyn. The druids were nowhere to be found during lunch, and Ashlyn’s car was still in the parking lot when I checked.

  Debating my options for only a moment, I sent Adira a text.

  Ashlyn wasn’t in second session, but her car is in the parking lot. Should I be worried?

  I’ll look into it. Focus on your studies.

  I rolled my eyes and went to the next session, watching the clock until the final bell rang. When I went out to the parking lot, Ashlyn’s car was gone.

  Breathing a sigh of relief, I went home. It wasn’t until I pulled into the driveway that I remembered Mom.

  I parked in the garage and turned off the car but didn’t go in. I stared at the kitchen door and tried to sort through what I felt. Yes, I was sad. I wished my mom hadn’t sided wi
th Adira’s crazy idea that I was dying and needed to hop in bed with someone to save myself. But mostly, I was relieved. It was hard enough fighting Adira’s manipulations, but facing Mom’s disappointment and worry day in and day out would have been too much. I would have given in eventually and hated myself for it.

  It was better this way.

  I repeated those words in my head as I left the car and made my way into the kitchen. Mrs. Quill was by the fridge and turned at the sound of the door.

  “Eliana,” she said with a smile. “Dinner will be ready at six. I’m making something special to celebrate.”

  “That sounds good. Thank you, Mrs. Quill.”

  I managed a return smile, and as I hurried away before she could say more, I told myself her excitement was a good sign. It meant everything had a chance of going back to normal. But why did her good mood make me feel like I was on the verge of tears, then?

  The house seemed so empty as I made my way upstairs. Too quiet.

  I’d barely had the thought when I heard a laugh ahead. My steps slowed. Further down the hall, the steady, familiar beat of music started.

  “Mom?” I called in disbelief.

  She stepped out of her room and came to me with arms wide.

  “Baby, you’re home.”

  Stunned, I didn’t fight her welcoming hug.

  “I’m so proud of you. I knew the moment I smelled him in that restaurant, he would be just what we needed to tempt you from your hunger strike.”

  I pulled back in confusion.

  “What are you talking about?”

  Mom smoothed her hand over my hair, still smiling at me.

  “The lusty werewolf boy that Adira paired you with in your Self-Discovery class. Was he able to walk after your feeding?”

  I jerked out of her arms.

  “Fenris? You think I fed off of Fenris?”

  “Didn’t you?”

  “Of course not. I wouldn’t do that to him.”

  She sighed.

  “That’s disappointing, but don’t worry. I’m sure things will go better tomorrow. And if not him, maybe I’ll find someone else whose scent is a little more potent. The way you avoided eye contact, I thought for sure he’d be the one.”