Less Broken

by Eve R. Hart

  I loved his breath?

  Who thinks that kind of stuff?!

  Well, at least I didn’t say that out loud.

  “What is this?” I whispered. I just needed a little confirmation that I wasn’t alone in these feelings.

  “I don’t know,” he said, his brow dipped low like he was just as bewildered by these feelings as I was.

  “But there’s something here, right?” I sounded needy and insecure, but for once, I didn’t care. I was safe with him to be me and that was something I couldn’t deny.

  “Yeah,” he said softly, a shy smile playing at the corners of his lips. “I’ve never…”

  “Same here,” I told him because I knew exactly what he was trying to say.

  Cade came into my life and hit me hard. I just didn’t realize what it was at first.

  “It’s a bit crazy, though, right?” My voice went high at the end, nearly cracking with the last word.

  Cade chuckled.

  “Probably,” he said with a tiny shrug.

  I reached up to cup the side of his face, my thumb stroking over the stubble along his jaw. I liked how it tickled my skin. I liked how it felt soft and rough at the same time. And I really, really liked how it made him look rugged and sexy. Well, he was rugged and sexy, but the stubble definitely helped with that.

  I didn’t think, I just moved. My lips met his softly and briefly. I forced myself to pull back before I could latch onto him and get carried away. Believe me, that was what I really wanted to do. Take him for all that he was worth and then some. Hop on and ride him off into the sunset… literally. I was all too aware of the dirty thoughts running through my head. Once they started, I couldn’t stop them. I mean, hello, I was in bed with this hot guy who was also sweet and caring. Protective and broken. He wasn’t perfect— neither was I. But something about that fact made him feel much more tangible, like maybe this could be real.

  “Tell me about you, Theon,” Cade said as he snuggled closer to my body. His arm easily slung over my side and I liked the weight of it there.

  I froze for a good long moment.

  This felt a little too familiar and it was all I could do to keep past moments with Perry from creeping into my head. It was times like this that I’d had with him where I spilled things I didn’t tell anyone. I’d been weak and, yeah, a little desperate too. I’d done it so easily without even knowing him.

  And here I found myself in the same position.

  I barely knew Cade— and barely was giving it too much credit. I knew he was a soldier. I knew… well, that was about it. His name. That he could lift a wallet smoothly. That he went through great lengths to get to know me. That he hadn’t even blinked an eye when I needed help. Oh, and he was still here.

  The longer I went on in my head, the more I started to see that he wasn’t Perry. This situation wasn’t the same though I didn’t know Cade all that well.

  Cade had a hard shell, but he’d already let me in. He’d already given me a peek at his heart.

  “I’m not him, Theon. I won’t hurt you,” he whispered and I came back to the world with a little nod.

  “I know. I’m sorry,” I replied. My hand moved away from his face, sliding down the side of his neck and around to his chest. I held on to his dog tags, which I’d noticed he hadn’t tucked back into his shirt.

  I liked the coolness of them against my fingers. The weight of them against my palm.

  “Tell me about the scars,” he said, causing my breath to get stuck in my chest.

  Of course he’d seen them in the hospital when I took off my shirt.

  I did my best to blink back the tears, but it was so hard.

  “Tell me, baby,” he urged.

  “The man that raised me… Carl,” I started. I took a deep breath and pressed on. I might have said I owed Cade after he’d shared such a big part of himself with me earlier, but that wasn’t exactly right. I didn’t owe him anything and I knew in my heart he’d never expect anything from me. But maybe, he deserved to have a piece of me too. “He never liked me. I guess I wasn’t what he hoped for in a son. And it became more apparent the older I grew.”

  I went on to tell Cade how Carl would take his anger out on me. Even going as far as to describe how he’d yank his belt off and hit me with it until I was bleeding and crying so hard on the floor that I couldn’t move.

  My mom had never been home when it happened and I’d always wondered if she suspected what went on while she was working. I tried hard to hide it from her because I didn’t want her to have another thing to worry about. She was already working so hard to take care of the family because Carl could never seem to hold down a job.

  Cade’s hand was reassuring and soothing as it rubbed lightly up and down my back. He didn’t look at me with pity but I could see how sad he was for me. How he wished I hadn’t had to go through any of it.

  It was written there in his beautiful eyes.

  And for once, I felt like everything would be okay.

  That I wasn’t the pathetic kid that took every ounce of abuse and never stood up for himself.

  Cade made me feel… well, unbroken.

  With one look in his eyes, I felt hope.

  “I know you don’t like it here, but is he the reason you’re going to college? To get away from him?” Cade asked and it was like he could see right into my soul.

  I nodded.

  “Yeah. A huge part of it. I had to get away, but I also want to make something of myself so that I can give my sister a better life. Maybe even take care of her.”

  “You have a sister?” His brows went up with the question but his voice oddly didn’t sound all that shocked.

  “Yes. Silvie— Silvia, but I call her Silvie. She’s seven.” I smiled wide thinking about her. “She’s so awesome. Total opposite of me at that age.”

  I let out a laugh thinking about how bubbly and friendly she was.

  When Cade asked me how, I went off talking about Silvie and her bright personality. It was so easy to talk about her and I was glad the conversation had shifted.

  “She sounds adorable,” he said and his smile was a clear reflection of the one that was stuck on my face.

  “She is.” I stopped just short of saying how I couldn’t wait for him to meet her. I was sure it was still too early for that sort of thing. “What about you? Do you have any siblings?”

  His head shook and he lost his smile.

  “It was always just me and my mom.”

  “Oh,” I said, getting the hint from his tone that he didn’t want to talk about it.

  Before I could think of something else to say, my phone vibrated loudly on the table beside the bed.

  I didn’t know the number but answered it anyway. With any luck, it was the police letting me know they’d picked up Perry and I could relax a little.

  “Hello?” I answered.

  “Is this Mr. Graham?”

  “Yes.”

  “This is Officer Hanks, we spoke last night at the hospital.”

  “Yes, hi. What can I do for you, Officer?” I looked at Cade nervously because there was something in the officer’s tone that had my hairs standing on end.

  “I just wanted to inform you that we have found Mr. Fisher.” His voice was flat but it didn’t really seem odd to me.

  “Okay, good. I mean, thank you.”

  “Mr. Graham?” he said like he was trying to stop me.

  “Yes?” I asked and I sounded shaky.

  “We recovered his body last night. He’d been shot once in the head.”

  Blood pumped in my ears. Whatever else he said, I didn’t catch a single word of it.

  Cade took the phone from my hand and then he was talking to the officer. I still couldn’t understand what was said, but I saw his lips moving.

  “Okay, I’ll let him know. Thank you, Officer,” Cade said right before he ended the call and handed my phone back to me.

  Perry was dead.

  Then something turned in my gut as
I looked at Cade.

  I shouldn’t have thought it, but it was there, nonetheless.

  Cade hadn’t been here when I woke up this morning.

  Cade was also deadly.

  I’d seen the look in his eyes when he found me last night.

  And I wouldn’t doubt that he knew how to kill someone. He’d been trained to, after all.

  “Time of death was last night,” Cade said and I could tell by his tone that he’d read my thoughts. I guessed it wasn’t hard to see from the look on my face what was going on in my head. “While we were at the hospital. We both have an alibi.”

  “I’m sorry,” I breathed out as my feet met the floor and I left the bed. I was ashamed for having those thoughts and there was nothing I could to do take it back.

  “It’s okay,” Cade told me with a sigh almost like he’d expected it.

  “So who killed him?” I said trying to move the conversation along.

  Something went wild in Cade’s eyes the same moment his body went rigid.

  “I’m going to get you out of here,” he said looking nearly frantic. “Something is going on. I’ve got to get you somewhere safe.”

  “Cade, I can’t go.”

  “Theon, this could be serious.”

  I had no clue what was going on. Perry was not a nice person and I wouldn’t doubt that he’d pissed the wrong person off. Surely, his death couldn’t be connected to me.

  But what if it is…

  A shiver ran down my spine and I felt real fear prickle my skin.

  “Tell me what you need and I’ll pack a bag,” Cade said as his eyes scanned every inch of my bedroom.

  When I didn’t move or say anything, he came around the bed and lightly grabbed my arm as if to guide me somewhere.

  “I’ll get you out of town until I—”

  “No!” I snapped and wrenched my arm out of his grasp. “I can’t!”

  He blinked down at me. I knew I had to explain my outburst, but I didn’t know how without telling him too much.

  “My brother is paying for everything. College. This apartment. Even the furniture… well, there was more, but that’s not the point. I can’t let him down. I don’t want to be a waste!”

  “Oh, baby,” he said as he gathered my sobbing body up in his arms. He held me tightly and I tried to ignore how right I seemed to fit against him. “You’re not a waste… Reed would never think that.”

  He realized his slip-up the same moment I did.

  I knew he had because his hold had stiffened around me.

  I pushed off of his chest and stumbled back.

  Reed.

  He knew my brother’s name. And I knew for sure, I’d never said it before in front of him.

  “Theon,” he said, his hands up in the air. A gesture that said he wouldn’t hurt me, but he already had. “Let me explain.”

  My body ached as I turned to run. I shook off the pain and made it as far as the kitchen. Cade walked calmly behind me. I was sure the reason for it was to set me at ease, but he reminded me more of a psycho killer from a horror movie.

  “Get out!” I screamed at the top of my lungs.

  A weapon.

  I needed something to defend myself.

  But I was frozen, only able to scream at him.

  Hey, it was better than nothing. It was more than I’d done with Perry.

  “Theon,” he tried again.

  “Get out! Get out! Get out!” The words felt as if they were being ripped from my chest.

  Then I remember the phone in my hand.

  “I’m calling the police,” I warned him. My hands shook. I couldn’t get my phone unlocked but I didn’t give up trying.

  “Okay,” he said with a defeated sigh. “I’m going. I don’t want you to hurt yourself. But I will be back and we will talk.”

  “Get out,” I said once more but this time, it held no strength.

  I closed my eyes. The tears fell freely.

  Once I heard the door close, I collapsed into a pile on the floor.

  There was no explanation he could give me that would fix this situation.

  I’d been all wrong about Cade.

  I’ll never trust again.

  17

  Cade

  A fucking week.

  It had been a whole week since I’d last touched Theon. Since I’d seen him up close. Since I’d kissed him.

  I was still watching him but this time, I made sure I stuck to the shadows. I didn’t dare show myself, no matter how much I wanted to. If he knew I was there, he acted like he didn’t. I caught him looking around whenever he left his apartment building or when he was walking about the campus. His eyes moved wildly but they never stopped in my direction. I knew he was looking for me, waiting for me to pop up out of nowhere, but I was giving him his space.

  Okay, really, I was lost in this situation.

  I didn’t know what I could do to fix this. It wasn’t even the fact that I knew his brother and had been sent to make sure he was safe. It was way beyond that at this point. I’d broken his trust and it would take a hell of a lot to earn it back. That was if I even could.

  This whole situation could have been avoided if I’d just told him the truth.

  After all, I had plenty of opportunities to.

  In a way, I’d messed up his life even more than Perry had.

  Theon had even stopped going to the coffee shop because of me.

  Yeah, I’d fucked up. I still wasn’t going to leave him though.

  I’d been trying to figure out how and why Perry had died. If it connected in any way with the shit Perry was trying to pull on Theon, then I needed to know.

  I might not have been able to get my hands on Perry, but I sure as hell wouldn’t think twice about taking out a new threat if it were to arise.

  I’d keep Theon safe at all costs.

  He already saw me as a monster, so why not give it my all. As long as he got to live his life in the end.

  Theon was tucked away in his apartment and I knew he wouldn’t be leaving for the rest of the night.

  He’d only left for class and once to go pick up some groceries. That had all been done in the daylight hours and now that the sun had gone down, I knew I could go.

  I didn’t want to, not knowing someone might be coming for him, but I had to take a break sometime. I figured if he was in the building, he could call out and someone would hear if he were in trouble. It was a comforting lie I told myself. All I had to do was look at what’d happened to him right there out in the open with Perry to know I was wrong in that line of thinking.

  I opened the door to my motel room, walked in a couple of steps, then froze. The door clicked closed behind me.

  I wasn’t alone.

  I could feel someone even before my head turned to the side to see an unknown figure sitting at the small table against the wall.

  “Who the fuck are you?” I growled, my hand reaching for the firearm at my back. I was met with silence, so I tried again. “I asked, who the fuck are you.”

  “Relax, Cade,” a familiar voice said from behind me, but it did nothing to set me at ease. “He’s with me.”

  I turned to face my friend and he did not look happy.

  “Never in a million years would I have thought that sending you down here would make the situation worse. Or rather, you would make it worse. What the fuck happened, Cade?” Reed’s voice held a mixture of humor and fury. Somehow. I wasn’t sure I understood it, but they were both there.

  “Still doesn’t tell me who this guy is,” I pointed out with a jerk of my thumb in the direction of the still-dark figure.

  “Jameson, Cade. Cade, meet Jameson,” Reed said, telling me absolutely nothing about why the guy was here or who the fuck he was. Reed rolled his eyes and his balled-up fists went to his hips. “He’s here to help keep an eye on Theon.”

  Reed jerked his head in the direction of the door.

  With sharp eyes, I watched Jameson as he rose out of the seat and walked in my
direction. The light from the bathroom caught on his face and I saw a recognizable hardness to him.

  He reminded me of myself, though I wasn’t happy to admit it.

  He held out his hand but remained silent as I shook it.

  There was a level of respect instantly.

  That said, I wasn’t sure I wanted him watching over Theon.

  “He can be there when you’re not,” Reed said and I knew the asshole had read my damn thoughts.

  “Right,” I mumbled out, and then Jameson was walking out the door without one fucking word said. “Doesn’t talk much, I take it.”

  Reed chuckled.

  “Not really,” he said.

  “Where’d you find him?”

  “We’ll talk about that later,” he answered with a nod. Then his face turned serious and I knew I wouldn’t be getting out of this without an explanation. “What the hell is going on?”

  “I fucked up,” I said flatly.

  “Got that much. What happened?”

  “I fell in love with your brother.” The words fell easily from my lips, though I hadn’t meant to say them. Now that it was out there, I felt a sense of relief.

  He looked at me with shock all over his face. It took a long moment for it to really sink in.

  I expected him to be pissed. To tell me that Theon was too good for someone as fucked up in the head as me. That I didn’t deserve someone as sweet and kindhearted as Theon.

  Which, I absolutely had no argument for. All of those things were true.

  “I knew there was something going on,” he said then blew out a breath. His hand went to his hair and he pushed the loose strands away from his face with one swipe. “Didn’t expect that, but okay.”

  “Okay?” I asked and now I was the one in shock.

  Reed shrugged and took a step closer to me. His hand went to my shoulder. He looked me in the eyes, a move that said he wanted me to really hear what he was about to say.

  “You’re one of the best people I know. Everything I would hope for my brother to find in a partner.”

  “Reed,” I said with a shake of my head.