Caelen's Wife, Book Three

by Suzan Tisdale

  He was glad she was barren. A barren wife meant he’d never have to worry himself into an early grave, worried that she’d die trying to bring his child into this world. Nay, a barren wife was a safe wife. That was one secret he was quite happy to keep to himself.

  She continued to weep against his chest. He knew how much she would have loved to give him a child, how desperately she wanted a child of her own. The more she cried, the more his heart ached for her and the more he was willing to say or do anything to make her feel better.

  “Mayhap we could adopt a child,” he said, hoping it would help her feel better.

  “But yer afraid of children!” she said, her tears ebbing just a bit.

  He laughed. “I be no’ afraid of children. I do no’ ken where ye get the idea.”

  “Burunild says ye refuse to hold anyone’s babe, because ye be afraid.”

  He laughed again. “Burunild does no’ ken as much as she likes to think she does,” he said as he kissed the top of her head again. “I do no’ hold anyone’s babes because I never got to hold me own. I felt as though I was betrayin’ me son by holdin’ someone else’s.”

  That made her cry all the more. “That be so sad!” she cried. His tunic was getting quite damp.

  He began to feel quite lost not knowing if there was anything he could say or do to make her feel better. He’d never seen this side of her before.

  “Wheesht, lass, wheesht,” he whispered.

  “I love ye, Caelen, with all me heart,” she said between sobs.

  “And I ye, wife. With all me heart.”

  He held her for a long while, until she had no more tears to shed. Finally, she looked up at him, her nose red, her skin blotchy and wet. “Do ye think ye might regret marryin’ me someday?” she asked hesitantly.

  He threw his head back and laughed. Once he got his laughter under control, he looked into her eyes and said, “No’ bloody likely.”

  Epilogue

  Fiona had never seen her husband looking quite so terrified before. Not even nine months ago when a little girl named Aingealag clung to his neck, refusing to let go. Nay, that was nothing compared to what he looked like at this moment.

  His skin was ashen and dark circles lined his usually bright brown eyes. He hadn’t truly slept in months, even less so since yesterday when her pains started.

  Now, he sat on a chair next to Fiona’s bed, holding her hand as she tried to hide the pain. Knowing all that she knew about her husband, and the guilt he’d suffered through for sixteen years before meeting her, Fiona could say unequivocally that this was truly harder on him than it was on her. His sole worry, as always, was over her safety. He wouldn’t truly rest until their child was born, he’d told her weeks ago. To which Fiona had had no choice but to laugh almost uncontrollably. “Ye think ye do no’ sleep now? Wait ’til this babe is born,” she’d warned him. He swore he had no idea what she meant. Of course he didn’t, for he had no experience with bairns, weans, or children younger than five and ten.

  Isabelle and Mairi were here, to offer their support and encouragement. They had travelled to the McDunnah keep a week ago, even though Mairi was heavy with her second child. Mairi had told Collin that he could either bring her here to be with Fiona or she’d walk, the choice was his. Collin relented and brought her.

  Isabelle had given birth to a daughter a few months ago. They’d named her Fiona. She was a sweet, beautiful little babe with dark hair and eyes that very much resembled her father, William. Conner and Maggie were very proud of their little sister. Though Maggie still did not speak, she now participated and engaged in activities, albeit silently. Isabelle and William were raising the two orphaned children now, and treated them as if they were their own. When Maggie smiled for the first time — upon their arrival and because Burunild gave her a sweet cake — Isabelle cried tears of joy. There was hope. Always hope.

  William and Collin were below stairs with Kenneth, Phillip, Burunild, Brodie, Andrew and Seamus. Richard had not joined the trek to McDunnah lands. He chose instead to watch over the McPherson keep.

  Brodie was here for two reasons. One, he wouldn’t miss his sister’s special moment and two, he was married to the woman helping Fiona bring the reason for that special moment into the world. He and Nola married three months prior and had made their home at the McPherson keep. But Fiona wanted Nola here, at the McDunnah keep, to help when her time came.

  “Ye can push now, Fiona,” Nola told her after checking her progress for what seemed like the hundredth time in the past few hours.

  Fiona let out a relieved breath, glad that the time to push had finally arrived. Nola had prepared her mentally for the agony that lay ahead. Some women found relief in pushing, others screamed out in agony. Each woman was different Nola told her and they would simply have to wait and see. Fiona did not care whether it hurt or not. Soon, she would hold a babe in her arms. Since she’d been convinced she was barren, this was an auspicious moment in her life. Though Caelen worried and fretted, Fiona refused to be anything less than ecstatic. She’d waited too many years to feel a babe kicking against her belly to worry over what might happen.

  Whilst most men chose to leave the birthing process to the women folk with a come and get me when it be over attitude, Caelen refused to leave Fiona’s side. She knew why and loved him all the more for it. ’Twas the lingering guilt he’d carried with him all these many years for not being there for his first wife when she needed him most. She had died trying to bring his babe into the world. The poor little boy never drew a breath. Caelen had been off fighting the English at the time. He’d never truly gotten over it.

  “Try no’ to scream when ye push,” Nola told her from the end of the bed. “Just bear down and push, Fi.”

  ’Twas God-awful hard work, this birthing business. Fiona felt some measure of relief in pushing. Her pains didn’t feel quite so intense.

  “Och!” Nola smiled. “I can see the head!”

  Caelen sat on the edge of his chair, holding Fiona’s hand, unable to offer any real words of encouragement. He leaned in and kissed her temple and whispered, “I love ye.”

  She could not respond at the moment for another pain hit and she was busy with pushing his child out of her body.

  “Good, Fiona! Keep pushin’ and ’twill all be over soon,” Nola said, encouragingly.

  “Aye,” Isabelle said as she stood at the end of the bed with a blanket for the babe. “Ye be doin’ a right fine job.”

  Six pushes later, little Anna McDunnah came screaming into the world.

  Cheers went up around the room.

  For the first time in months, Caelen McDunnah actually smiled.

  “I have a daughter!” he proclaimed proudly. “Ye did it, Fi! Ye did it!”

  Fiona fell back against the bed as Nola placed the screaming babe on Fiona’s belly, tied off the cord, and set about with tending to everything else that happens after a woman gives birth.

  Isabelle wrapped the babe in a blanket, whilst Mairi went racing to the stairs to let those below know that the babe was here and ’twas a girl.

  Isabelle wiped a warm, damp cloth across the babe’s face and lifted her up. She walked around to Caelen, who was planting much relieved kisses all over his wife’s face. “I love ye, Fiona, I do,” he told her between kisses.

  Isabelle cleared her throat. “Sit, Caelen McDunnah.”

  He didn’t bother asking why. He sat back in the chair, still smiling from ear to ear.

  Without warning, Isabelle placed the babe into his arms. At first, he tried to protest, but she gave him a look of warning that he was quite certain she had learned from his wife.

  So he sat, in the quiet hours of the night, holding his precious daughter.

  The fire crackled in the hearth, people were busy about the room, but Caelen paid attention to nothing but his daughter. Though he was beyond joyful at holding his child, secretly, he prayed he’d never have to live through another tormenting time like the one he’d been livi
ng through ever since the moment Fiona had told him she was with child. ’Twas more frightening than any battle he’d ever endured, including the one where he’d earned the scar that lined his face and side.

  She was a sweet, tiny babe, with soft wisps of hair, a perfect little nose and a perfect little mouth. Though he had previously agreed to naming her Anna, after Fiona’s mother, he now thought she should have a name that personified perfection. He wouldn’t even bother with sharing his thoughts with Fiona. She’d likely pin him to the wall if he decided to change her name at the last minute.

  “Might I hold her?” Fiona asked.

  Caelen looked up from his daughter to his wife. God’s teeth but the woman was beautiful. Even more so now that she’d given him a child, though he had convinced himself he never wanted one.

  Carefully, he stood and placed their daughter in Fiona’s arms. Tears of joy streamed down Fiona’s face as she softly caressed her little cheeks. “She be beautiful, aye?”

  “Aye, the most beautiful babe ever to grace God’s earth.”

  Fiona smiled and placed a soft kiss on Anna’s forehead.

  “I have a daughter,” Fiona whispered as if she couldn’t truly believe it.

  Caelen climbed into the bed beside his wife. “Part of me wishes she looked more like me,” Caelen said. “Then I’d no’ have to worry about lads chasin’ after her.”

  “Do no’ worry over it husband,” Fiona told him. “Fer I shall teach her how to use a sword, knife, and bow and arrow.”

  Deciding now was not the most appropriate time to argue over such a thing, he simply smiled at his wife. No’ bloody likely.

  Also by Suzan Tisdale

  The Clan MacDougall Series

  Laiden’s Daughter

  Findley’s Lass

  Wee William’s Woman

  McKenna’s Honor

  * * *

  The Clan Graham Series

  Rowan’s Lady

  Frederick’s Queen

  * * *

  The Mackintoshes and McLarens Series

  Ian’s Rose

  The Bowie Bride

  Rodrick the Bold

  Brogan’s Promise

  * * *

  The Clan McDunnah Series

  A Murmur of Providence

  A Whisper of Fate

  A Breath of Promise

  * * *

  Moirra’s Heart Series

  Stealing Moirra’s Heart

  Saving Moirra’s Heart

  * * *

  Stand Alone Novels

  Isle of the Blessed

  Forever Her Champion

  The Edge of Forever

  * * *

  Arriving in 2018:

  Black Richard’s Heart

  * * *

  The Brides of the Clan MacDougall

  (A Sweet Series)

  Aishlinn

  Maggy (arriving 2018)

  Nora (arriving 2018)

  * * *

  Coming Soon:

  The MacAllens and Randalls

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  About the Author

  USA Today Bestselling Author, storyteller and cheeky wench, SUZAN TISDALE lives in the Midwest with her verra handsome carpenter husband. All but one of her children have left the nest. Her pets consist of dust bunnies and a dozen poodle-sized, backyard-dwelling groundhogs – all of which run as free and unrestrained as the voices in her head. And she doesn’t own a single pair of yoga pants, much to the shock and horror of her fellow authors. She prefers to write in her pajamas.

  Suzan writes Scottish historical romance/fiction, with honorable and perfectly imperfect heroes and strong, feisty heroines. And bad guys she kills off in delightfully wicked ways.

  She published her first novel, Laiden’s Daughter, in December, 2011, as a gift for her mother. That one book started a journey which has led to fifteen published titles, with two more being released in the spring of 2017. To date, she has sold more than 450,000 copies of her books around the world. They have been translated into four foreign languages (Italian, French, German, and Spanish.)

  You will find her books in digital, paperback, and audiobook formats.

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