The cashier was a teenage girl with dyed blue hair. She shot me a wry look when I placed all three pregnancy tests on the counter. I half-expected her to say something snarky, but all she asked was, “Did you find everything you needed?”
“Yeah,” I said, tapping my fingers on the counter as she rung me up.
“Are you a rewards member?” she asked, gesturing to the little keypad where I could enter an ID number for discounts.
I wasn't even sure which pharmacy I was in, and I couldn't remember if I had a rewards card with them. It was the last thing on my mind. I jabbed my finger on the “cancel” button repeatedly. “No. It's fine. Thanks.”
The girl shrugged, ringing up my purchase. She gave me the total. I grabbed my bag, throwing some money down on the counter and walking away without waiting for my change.
I started heading back to the office. Halfway there, I realized I couldn't walk in carrying a bag full of pregnancy tests. I had to take care of this before I went back.
There was a fast food place nearby. I went there sometimes on my lunch break. I headed inside, figuring I could use their bathroom even if I wasn't a paying customer today.
I locked myself in a stall and tried to pee. I sat there holding one of the tests in a shaking hand. After a few minutes of useless effort I gave up. I hadn't had anything to drink all morning, so I just didn't have to go.
I pulled up my panties, adjusted my dress, and headed out to stand in line. I bought an extra large soda, which was three times as much as I could normally drink. I sat at a table, gulping down Diet Coke as fast as I could. It made my stomach hurt to drink it so fast, but I kept forcing it down. It didn't take long before I could feel the urge to run to the bathroom again.
Sitting in the stall once more, I took the first test. I read and reread the instructions while I waited for the results. The package said it would take about two minutes for the results to show.
It had only been about ten seconds, but I couldn't resist looking at the little stick.
It had two pink lines on it.
"That can't be right," I muttered to myself.
I opened the second test, certain I had done something wrong. Maybe I had just looked at the test too soon. The results couldn't ha e been accurate if the test completed so quickly.
The second test made it even more clear. It was a digital one, and the word "pregnant" displayed clear as day on the tiny screen.
"Fuck."
Third time's the charm, I told myself, opening the last test.
It only confirmed what the first two tests had told me.
I was still sitting in the stall when my phone rang. It was Kelsey, my boss's assistant. Double fuck.
"Yes," I said, answering the phone while I fought off tears. "I'm on my way. Sorry. I'll be right there."
I was speaking in such a rush that Kelsey hadn't had a chance to get a word in. When she finally got the chance to speak, she asked, "Jillian, are you okay? Is everything all right?"
I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath. Everything was not okay. But I couldn't tell her what was going on. I didn't even know if I could tell Jack yet. Besides which, it wasn't as if Kelsey and I were friends. We got along well enough around the office, but she wasn't the first person I would have run to to talk about a problem as personal as this.
"Everything's fine," I told her. "Just a little under the weather. I'll be right there. I promise."
"All right," she said. "I'll tell Jack you're on your way."
She hung up the phone. I took a few moments to clean myself up, washing my face in the sink so it wouldn't seem like I'd been crying. I wrapped the pregnancy tests up in toilet paper and tucked them into my purse. Then I headed back to the office, trying to figure out what I would say to Jack.
How to tell my husband that I was pregnant.
I made my way down to Jack's office. I passed by Kelsey's desk on the way by. She looked up at me, opening her mouth to say something, maybe to check on how I was feeling, or to ask what was wrong. I moved past her as quickly as I could. I didn't want anyone in the office to know what was wrong.
In Jack's office, I immediately shut and locked the door. I turned to face him, bracing my back against the door.
He looked up at me, his expression a mixture of concern and bewilderment. He licked his lips, rising from behind his desk and circling around it to stand in front of me.
"Jillian," he said, looking me over. "Are you all right? You look flushed."
Part of me wanted to just blurt out, "I'm pregnant," and get it over with. But I was too scared. I'd only just learned myself. I hadn't had time to process it yet. I really just wanted to go home. To have some time to myself, to let the reality of the situation start to sink in. Being here within mere minutes after finding out, it was all too much for me to handle.
I tried to speak, but no words came. A slight whimper escaped my lips. Tears welled in my eyes.
"Oh, Jillian..." Jack came over to me, putting his arms around me. He stroked my hair, shushing me. I clung to him, sobbing against his chest.
"Jillian," he whispered in my ear. "It's okay. It's just a little bit of paperwork, and then everything will be over with."
I closed my fingers around the fabric of his shirt, holding on tight. He didn't understand. It wouldn't be over. If I signed the papers now, I would still be pregnant. And then I'd be raising a child alone, a single mother without a husband to help support her. Oh, sure, I knew Jack would pay child support. But that wasn't the same thing as being a father. As being my husband. Us being a family.
I needed to keep us together. I needed Jack to stay with me. Even if our relationship wasn't technically real, we had something between us. I'd felt a connection with him ever since that first night. Maybe, I thought, I could convince him to stay with me. Convince him that I was someone special, too.
I couldn't tell him I was pregnant. Not yet. I didn't know Jack that well, but I knew enough to know the kind of person he was. If he learned that I was pregnant, it would change the way he acted towards me. He would take care of me out of a sense of obligation, but that wasn't the same as loving me. I was certain that he would distance himself from me, offering me all the financial help I needed without letting me into his heart.
I didn't want my baby to have some long-distance dad who only sent checks and mailed gifts on Christmas. I needed my child to have a real father.
I kept my face pressed against his chest, thinking it through. It might have been wrong to hide the truth from him, but I had to take the chance. To try to convince him that I was the girl for him. Then, once I knew I'd won his heart, I'd tell him about the baby, and I'd be able to know that he was staying with me because of me, and not just because of a sense of obligation.
I looked up at him. He was still stroking my hair. He gazed into my eyes. I thought I saw something there. A touch of sympathy, to be sure, but maybe something more. Restrained desire.
“Jillian,” he said.
I stopped him from saying more by pressing my lips against his.
He returned the kiss for one sweet, wonderful moment. Then he tried to pull back. His face bore a mixture of confused emotions, lust warring with hesitation. Part of me almost felt bad, like I was pressuring him into something. But deep down, I knew he wanted it. He was only trying to resist because he felt guilty, because I was his employee.
But I was more than his employee. I was also his wife.
He opened his mouth to protest, but I cut him off by sticking my tongue down his throat. He gasped in surprise, nearly falling over. I slid a hand down towards his crotch, finding him already hard. That just told me what I already knew: that he wanted me, whether he was ready to admit it or not.
I broke the kiss, looked him dead in the eye, and said, “No talking.”
He opened his mouth.
I touched a finger to his lips.
My other hand kept rubbing his crotch, getting him harder.
Jack closed his eyes, giving in an
d pulling me in for another kiss.
I unzipped his pants. He ran his hands along my back, sending shivers up my spine. His hands reached lower, grabbing my ass. He pulled me in close, pressing his hard on against me. His lips broke away from mine, and he started kissing my neck and nibbling on my ear. I closed my eyes, whimpering softly. With every passing moment he was becoming more bold and aggressive, letting go of the inhibitions that had held him back moments before.
I undid his belt, dropping his pants to the floor. He reached up and unzipped my dress, letting it join his pants on the floor.
Jack stepped out of his pants, taking a step back and looking at me in my bra and panties. His eyes filled with lust and desire. He reached up and touched my breasts, squeezing them gently and rubbing his thumbs against my nipples. I reached behind my back to unclasp my bra, letting it fall away so he could have full access.
Jack fondled my breasts for a few moments, before scooping me up in his arms. I squealed, letting out a delighted laugh. I glanced at the door, fully aware that the entire office was right on the other side of that door, hard at work and unaware that I was in here with the boss, about to get fucked. But I didn't care. I needed Jack. I needed to feel him inside of me.
He laid me down on his desk, pulling my panties off. The desk was cold and hard, and being on top of it, naked, made me feel vulnerable and exposed. It was a rush. I braced my elbows against the desk, looking up at Jack with wide eyes. He pulled off his shirt and underwear, stepping between my legs. He grabbed my thighs, bracing my legs against his chest and shoulders. I looked down between my legs at his thick, hard cock. He started rubbing it against my smooth pussy. I bit my lip, whimpering. I was aching for it. I needed it inside of me.
“Please,” I whispered, looking up into his eyes.
“Please what?” he asked, grinning. I could tell he was enjoying being in control. He had me completely at his mercy. I might have been the one that initiated this, but he'd taken charge, and now he owned me.
“Please fuck me.” I tried to press myself against him, to get him inside of me. He only teased the head of his cock against my pussy.
“This is what you want?” he asked.
I nodded, pleading at him with my eyes. “Yes. I need it.”
“Why?” he asked, clearly enjoying making me beg.
I lowered my eyes, unable to respond. I couldn't tell him the truth, that I needed him because he was the father of my unborn child, that I needed us to be together. I had to let him think it was just about lust.
He touched a finger under my chin, forcing me to look up at him. He locked his eyes onto mine. “Why do you need it?”
I swallowed. I had to tell him something. I thought about what he would want to hear. I had so little sexual experience, but I knew enough from porn and from stories friends had told. I thought I knew what he wanted to hear.
“Because,” I said. “Because I'm a dirty little slut.”
He smirked, pushing me down fully onto the desk. His cock pressed against my opening, and he worked it in with a few quick, hard thrusts.
I held onto the edge of the desk, pressing my lips together hard to keep from crying out. Jack stood above me, fucking me hard. The father of my child was filling me up, giving himself to me, taking control of me, and it was all I wanted in the world.
“Take it, you little slut,” Jack hissed. He kept his voice low, but I worried someone would hear. I glanced over at the door, wondering if anyone knew. If someone could be out there, ear pressed against the door, listening, while I was pinned down on the boss's desk and used like a little slut.
The idea of getting caught thrilled me. I reached up and ran my fingers along Jack's chest, spurring him on. “Give it to me,” I whispered. “Please.”
“Tell me what you want, slut,” he said.
I swallowed. I looked into his eyes. He kept thrusting into me, his hardness filling every inch of me. “I want your cum,” I said.
I groaned in pleasure.
I told him again, “I want you to come inside of me.”
He fucked me faster, shaking the desk. A couple of pens rolled off and fell to the floor. My head bumped into his computer monitor. He didn't care, he didn't stop. He had what he wanted, and I knew nothing would stop him now.
I could feel the moment approaching. Jack's face was scrunched up, his breathing was growing tense. I nodded in encouragement, whispering, “Yes, yes. Please. Inside of me.”
He looked into my eyes. I saw conflict there. He let out one final grunt of pleasure.
Then he pulled out, grabbing his cock in his hand and pumping it to finish his orgasm. Hot, sticky cum spilled across my belly and chest. I gasped, shocked at the unexpected way he'd done it. I looked down at his cock as he continued coming all over me, making me a mess. It made me feel dirty. It made me feel owned.
Jack leaned against the desk, panting. As he slowly caught his breath, he reached up and touched my cheek. “If this is going to become a regular thing,” he said, “we need to use some kind of protection.”
I trembled. Tears started welling in my eyes. I climbed off the desk, turning away from Jack. He didn't seem to notice my reaction, as he was gathering his clothes.
He'd pulled out on purpose. Because we weren't using any protection.
Because he didn't want to risk getting me pregnant.
I knew that it was already too late for that.
With his pants back on, Jack handed me a towel. I wiped myself up, then quickly got dressed, avoiding eye contact with him. He watched me get dressed, a concerned look on his face. He could probably tell that something was wrong.
“Jillian,” he said, reaching out and touching my shoulder. “Jillian, this is what you wanted, right?”
I forced myself to smile. I looked up at him, nodded, and kissed him on the cheek. I pulled him close, whispering into his ear, “I want you. Every day I want you.”
He was tense for a moment, then he put his arms around me. I wondered if I'd made a mistake, confessing to him like that. Maybe it was too much. Maybe he was hoping just for a casual office fling, a girl he could fuck, then send back to her desk, still sticky with his cum. But even if he didn't know it yet, he had something more.
I just had to hope he would want me for more than just sex.
We kissed. He made me promise not to tell anyone. I promised, no more eager than he was to have the rest of the office find out what was going on between us. We finished getting dressed, I touched up my hair, and I left Jack's office.
On my way out, I passed by Kelsey. Her eyes locked onto me, her lips pressed tightly together.
I wondered if she knew. She was the closest one to Jack in the entire office. If anyone would pick up on it, it was her.
I walked past her, keeping my head down. But as I left, I could still feel her eyes on my back.
6
Jack
I leaned against my desk after Jillian left, running my fingers through my hair and adjusting my clothes. I had to look professional around the office, after all. I couldn't afford a scandal.
I hadn't expected Jillian to come in here and start touching and kissing me like that. It had been wonderful. Amazing, really. She was so beautiful, so eager to please. Part of me felt like it was wrong. She was my employee, and she was half my age. But I'd never felt so invigorated as when I was around her. I'd been with other girls before, of course, but it had always just been sex. I'd never had someone send such a spark through me before. I told myself that it was just the rush of doing it in the office, though deep down I knew there was something more.
I looked at the folder on my desk, containing my copies of the annulment paperwork. I'd meant to discuss it with Jillian, to ask her if she had any questions about the paperwork, or if she needed help filling it out. We hadn't even discussed it. Now I'd need another way to find time to talk to her about it.
Not at the office, however. This was the second time I'd called her into my office, only to have it end up
leading to a carnal act. I couldn't afford to keep succumbing to temptation like that.
There was a knock at my door. Jillian had closed it on her way out.
I checked myself over to make sure I looked presentable. I had to pretend that I hadn't just gotten laid, right here in my own office.
I cleared my throat and said, “Come in.”
The door opened. Kelsey stepped in. She shut the door behind her, something she only ever did when she had important or private business to discuss.
I moved behind my desk and sat down. I adjusted my computer monitor back into position, and straightened out the papers on my desk. They had been jostled quite a bit when Jillian was laid out on the desk. A few of the papers had sweat marks on them from where her back had been pressed against them.
I tucked those papers out of sight and asked Kelsey, “What do you need?”
She stepped over to my desk, drumming her fingers against the folder in her hands. She was silent for a moment, as if she were weighing her words.
A sense of dread filled me. She knew.
I waited for her to confirm it. If anyone would have picked up on it, it was Kelsey. She was the eyes and ears of the office. I ran everything through her. Truth be told, I couldn't have run this place without her. I knew more about software, and how to pitch a deal to clients, than I did about actually running an office. I didn't know how to organize workers, how to make things run more efficiently. I knew what I needed to have done, and Kelsey was the one who made sure that it happened. Technically, her title was my “assistant,” but she was the de facto office manager, and everyone knew it.
“Can I help you with something, Kelsey?” I asked. I set my jaw and sat up straighter, bracing myself for the conversation.
“Yes,” she said, drawing the word out, hesitation clear in her tone. “It's...it's not something I would like to bring up, you understand. But I feel like something needs to be said.”
Beautiful Mistakes: Contemporary Romance Boxset Books 1-4 Page 59
