Wounded Souls

by R J Nolan

  Dale’s stomach rumbled.

  Logan laughed. “And here I thought you might still be full from all those pancakes.”

  Elbowing her, Dale said, “It wasn’t that many.” She turned serious as she met Logan’s gaze. “Did you get some rest?” Of course, she was really asking about a lot more than that but wasn’t sure Logan would respond now that they were at work.

  “Yes, I did. The time we spent together this morning…it helped a lot.”

  Dale’s heart fluttered at the openness and vulnerability in Logan’s gaze. She longed to pull her into her arms as she had on the beach and shield her from anything ever hurting her again. Even as she thought it, she acknowledged the impossibility. She settled for placing her hand on the small of Logan’s back, enjoying the warmth that permeated her palm.

  Logan hustled into the staff lounge at the end of the shift to pick up her jacket and backpack. She was eager to get to Casey’s, as she had not gotten to see Drake yesterday. By the time she had left Dale’s, Casey had already taken Drake to her parents’ home, where she would be spending the day. She’d had some reservations about that, but Casey had reassured her that she would keep a close eye on him, and it was much better than leaving him alone all day.

  The lounge door swung open, admitting Dale.

  “Hey, Logan. Could I interest you in going out to breakfast? I still want to introduce you to the omelets at Gina’s Café.”

  While tempted, Logan needed to be with Drake. “Sorry. I already have plans for breakfast with Drake and Casey.”

  A scowl flashed across Dale’s face before she abruptly turned away. “Yeah. Okay. Some other time.” She jerked open the door of her locker with more force than necessary.

  Taken aback by Dale’s sudden change in mood, Logan frowned. Did Dale think she was trying to co-opt her friendship with Casey? Logan shook her head. That didn’t seem like Dale at all. Unwilling to ignore the possibility, she approached Dale. “I’d like to have breakfast together. Why don’t you come with me to Casey’s?”

  Dale turned, her smile once again in place. “Really?”

  “Of course. Get your stuff and let’s go.”

  As she turned back to her locker, Dale felt like kicking herself for overreacting. Casey had told her that Logan had breakfast every morning with Drake. While she knew her jealousy of the time they spent together was ridiculous, she hadn’t managed to squash it.

  The ringing of Logan’s phone pulled Dale from her thoughts.

  Logan pulled the phone out of her pocket and glanced at the screen. “Speak of the devil.” She hit the connect button. “Hi, Casey. We were just getting ready to head your way. Dale’s joining us.”

  When the smile dropped from Logan’s face, Dale tensed. Had something happened to Drake?

  “I understand. Maybe tomorrow.” The disappointment in Logan’s voice was palpable.

  She moved closer to Logan. “What’s wrong?”

  Logan pulled the phone away from her ear. “Casey’s too tired for company.”

  Dale frowned. That didn’t sound like Casey. Something wasn’t right here. “Let me talk to her.”

  Logan handed over her phone.

  “Hey, Case. You okay?”

  “No biggie. Just tired after a day with the family.”

  Now Dale knew something was wrong. Casey loved the time she spent with family and always claimed it energized her. Aware of Logan standing close to her elbow, she held up one finger, and walked several feet away and turned her back on Logan. “Okay.” She lowered her voice. “Logan’s out of earshot. What’s wrong?”

  “Nothing—”

  “Don’t give me that crap.” Worry for her friend harshened her tone.

  “You are such a pain in the ass.”

  Dale let out a growl. “Casey.”

  Casey’s sigh filtered through the line. “Fine. Look, I developed a good-sized rub spot. I don’t want to take the chance of another infection; that last one was bad. I’ve already talked to Bob. He’s going to check my socket tomorrow and make an adjustment. In the meantime, I’m not wearing my legs.”

  Relief swept through Dale. This was something they both dealt with. “So why did you lie to Logan? She’d understand.”

  The silence dragged on for several long moments.

  “Casey?”

  “Logan doesn’t know.”

  Know what? Then it hit her. The question was—why? Casey never had a problem with anyone knowing about her amputations. Dale had been out in public with her plenty of times when she used her wheelchair or wore her stubbies instead of her full-length legs. She had always seen Casey as an inspiration and role model and hoped to one day be as comfortable with her own amputation.

  More confused than ever, Dale mentally shook her head. “Why not?”

  She was met with continued silence.

  “Why not, Casey?” There was more here than met the eye.

  “Remember the first day you brought Logan here to meet me?”

  Dale’s brow furrowed. “Of course.”

  “I looked out the peephole before I opened the door. You looked so nervous. Then, when I opened the door and you saw I was wearing my full-length legs and jeans, you seemed so relieved.”

  “Okay. So I was a little worried that Logan might not feel comfortable leaving Drake with you at first if she knew. But I figured by now—”

  “It wasn’t just that. At the VA, as soon as I talked about my work with amputees, you started looking stressed before I even got a chance to mention my own amputations.”

  Had she? Dale thought back to that morning. It hadn’t been about Casey, but about her own discomfort with having Logan there. While of course Logan knew the truth, she had still wanted Logan to think of her as whole. Having her see other amputees without their prosthetics and think of Dale that way had bothered her. Her stomach sank with the realization that Casey had done something she never did—hid her amputations—because of her. “I’m so sorry, Casey. I never meant for you to do that.”

  “It’s okay.”

  “No it’s not!” Dale realized her voice must have gotten loud when Logan laid a hand on her shoulder.

  “Everything okay?” Logan asked, low-voiced.

  “Everything’s fine. We’re going to Casey’s.”

  Logan raised an eyebrow.

  “Are you sure about this?” Casey asked.

  “We’ll be there in about forty-five minutes. Don’t do anything. I’ll make us breakfast.”

  “Ah. That’s okay. I can manage.”

  Dale grinned. Casey was well aware of her cooking skills or, rather, lack of them. “Better yet, we’ll let Logan make breakfast. She’s a much better cook than I am.”

  “You’re sure?” Casey asked again.

  “That she’s a better cook? Positive,” Dale said, knowing full well that wasn’t what Casey meant.

  “Dale.” Casey’s voice held a warning tone.

  “I’m positive. I’ll take care of everything.”

  “Okay. Let yourself in when you get here.”

  Dale said goodbye, disconnected the call and handed Logan her phone back.

  “What’s going on? I thought Casey didn’t want any company?”

  Dale needed to make this right. “There’s something I have to tell you before we go to Casey’s.”

  The lounge door swung open, and several nurses filed in.

  “Come on. We’ll talk outside in the parking lot.”

  Logan’s brow furrowed, but she followed Dale without comment.

  When they reached Logan’s SUV, Dale leaned back against it. “Looks like it’s going to be a beautiful day.” The storm clouds had cleared, leaving the sky a brilliant blue usually only seen on a picture postcard. She took a moment and closed her eyes before lifting her face toward the sun, soaking it in.

/>   “What’s going on with Casey, Dale?”

  Straightening, Dale jammed her hands into the pockets of her jacket. She wasn’t sure how to start this conversation. “It wasn’t because she was tired that Casey didn’t want you to come over.”

  Logan’s eyes narrowed. “She lied to me?”

  “Not maliciously. She has…I mean she is…”

  “Is she having problems with Drake?” Logan took a step closer. “Is he too much for her? Why didn’t she just tell me that?”

  “No. That’s not it.” Dale raked her hands through her shaggy hair. This was harder than she thought. Maybe she should have let Casey be the one to tell Logan. She shook her head roughly. She had caused this, and now she needed to fix it.

  “Whatever it is, just spit it out.”

  Oh great, now she was pissed. Dale was really screwing this up. Stop being a coward and tell her the truth. “She lied because of me.” She ducked her head as guilt washed over her.

  “Why would you want her to lie to me?”

  “I didn’t mean for her to.” Looking up, she blew out a breath, then blurted it out. “Casey’s like me. Only in her case, she’s a bilateral trans-femoral amputee.”

  Logan blinked rapidly several times, then took a big step back as if wanting to distance herself from Dale. “You didn’t trust me.”

  The hurt in her voice pierced Dale’s heart as painfully as an arrow. “At first, I was worried you wouldn’t think she was capable of taking care of Drake. I figured once you got to know her and realized she could, you’d be fine with it. But then she thought I still didn’t want you to know, so when she wasn’t up to wearing her prosthetics today…” It all sounded pretty lame now.

  Logan crossed her arms over her chest. “Right. Like I said. You didn’t trust me.”

  Regret weighted her shoulders. “I wanted to help you with Drake so much that I made a mistake.” Not to mention letting her own insecurities rule her. Yesterday had drawn them so much closer, and now she had probably ruined their friendship. And let Casey down to boot. “I should have been honest with you. I’m sorry.” She dropped her gaze and pushed away from Logan’s SUV. “I’ll see you tonight at work.”

  Logan caught her arm. “I thought we were going to Casey’s?”

  Hope flared. “You still want me to go with you?”

  Logan leveled a stern look at her. “On two conditions.”

  “Anything.” Maybe she hadn’t completely messed things up between them.

  “Give me the benefit of the doubt next time.” Logan poked her in the chest. “And don’t lie—even by omission.”

  Dale put her hand over her heart as she gazed deeply into Logan’s eyes. “I promise.”

  Her tense posture relaxing, Logan smiled. She laid her hand for a moment on top of the one Dale had over her heart. “Good. Thank you.” She pulled open the driver’s side door. “I’ll meet you at Casey’s.” She shooed Dale away. “Get your butt in gear. I’m hungry.”

  Laughing, Dale trotted toward her Jeep. The day was looking up after all.

  CHAPTER 27

  Logan pulled up in front of Casey’s house. She glanced in her rearview mirror, but there was no sign of Dale. She’d lost her two streets back when Dale had gotten caught by a stoplight. Her mind was still reeling from Dale’s revelation. After noticing Casey’s gait and the way she seemed to purposely set herself before doing anything physical, she had been convinced that she had suffered some type of injury. Never in her wildest imagination had she suspected that Casey was a double amputee. She had grown to like Casey at lot in the short time they’d known each other. And of course, she was grateful to her for looking after Drake. But now, she also respected and admired her for how she had reclaimed her life after a devastating injury.

  While she was ticked at Casey for lying to her, she understood why she’d done it. It didn’t have anything to do with Casey herself but with protecting Dale. Logan could understand the impulse. The fact that Dale hadn’t trusted her was what had really hurt. Especially after all they had shared yesterday. But the fact that Dale had come clean and her heartfelt apology had gone a long way in assuaging Logan’s hurt.

  A rap on her side window startled her out of her thoughts.

  Dale stood next to the SUV.

  Logan opened the door and got out.

  “So what are you making us for breakfast?” Dale asked as they walked toward the house.

  It had felt great to have Dale praise her cooking to Casey, but that wasn’t going to stop her from giving Dale a hard time. “Now I get it. You only want me for my cooking skills.” Logan flushed. That had not come out the way she meant.

  Dale’s eyes darkened, and she looked as if she was about to comment, then thought better of it. “I’ll cook if you want.” She grinned “But don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

  Logan elbowed her. “Never mind. I’m happy to cook for you anytime.” As soon as the words left her mouth, she silently berated herself. What do you think you’re doing? This isn’t a long-term deal. She had already become more attached to Dale—and Casey—than she should.

  Dale rubbed her hands together. “All right.”

  When they reached the front of the house, Dale motioned Logan to follow her. She walked over to the side of the house, blindly reached over the five-foot wooden gate to unlatch it, and headed into the back yard. As Dale tugged the sliding glass door open, she called out, “Good morning.”

  Logan followed her into the living room.

  Casey was sitting at the far end of the sofa, wearing sweatpants that had been shortened so that they just covered her residual limbs. Drake was stretched out next to her, hogging the rest of the couch. His big head was resting on her thigh. A wheelchair, with two padded rests extending from the narrow seat, stood next to the couch. She puzzled it out after a moment. They must be for Casey’s residual limbs so they didn’t hang down and swell.

  “Hey,” Casey said by way of greeting.

  Drake raised his head. His tail thumped against the arm of the couch, but he made no move to get down.

  Logan scowled. He knew he wasn’t allowed on the furniture. Her gaze landed on his shaved abdomen and long incision, and she relented. But she couldn’t let it go completely. She shook her finger at him. “Don’t get used to that. Once you’re healed, it’s back to the floor for you.”

  Drake woo-wooed as if contradicting her.

  Casey laughed and patted him. “You tell her, boy.”

  Logan turned her scowl on Casey.

  The smile dropped from Casey’s face. She pressed her palms against the cushion of the couch and straightened her posture.

  Logan marched over and stood directly in front of her. She glanced down at her legs, then back up. “I don’t appreciate being lied to.” She looked back at Dale for a second before allowing her expression to soften. “Don’t do it again.”

  Casey met her gaze unflinchingly and an unspoken understanding passed between them. She stuck out her hand. “Deal.”

  “Deal.” Logan affirmed and took her hand.

  Dale watched them shake hands. Once again, she marveled at Logan’s easy acceptance. There Casey was, sitting with two missing legs, and Logan hadn’t even batted an eye. Her only reaction had been being pissed at Casey for lying to her. At the reminder of Casey hiding her amputations because of her, guilt washed over Dale again. Logan wasn’t the only one she owed an apology.

  Her steps lagged as she moved toward the couch.

  Casey looked up at her.

  The look of understanding on her face was Dale’s undoing. “I’m sorry.” Unexpected tears stung her eyes.

  Casey opened her arms.

  Dale started to lean down, then stopped. Her gaze darted back and forth between Casey and Drake. Although she knew the dog was friendly, she still had some trepidation with getting so close to him.
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  Logan moved away from the couch. “Drake. Come here.”

  For a moment, it looked as if the big dog wouldn’t obey.

  Logan loudly cleared her throat.

  Drake got off the couch with surprising alacrity. As he approached Logan, he looked back over his shoulder and gave Dale a look as if he knew she was to blame for him losing his comfortable spot.

  Logan loved on him as soon as he reached her.

  Momentarily distracted by Logan, Dale turned back toward Casey. She slumped down onto the couch and into Casey’s arms. “I’m sorry,” she whispered again.

  “We’re fine.” Casey tightened her arms around her for a moment, then released her. “Everything is out in the open now.” She shoved Dale’s shoulder hard enough to knock her over. “So you’re throwing me over for a better cook, huh?”

  Dale laughed, grateful for the break in the tension. She sat back up next to Casey. “Wait ’til you taste her cooking. You’ll be the one begging her to cook for you.”

  “We’ll see about that.” Casey grinned at Logan. “Okay, Chef. What culinary creation are you going to make for us?”

  “Great. No pressure or anything,” Logan muttered.

  “Don’t listen to her. You don’t have to cook if you don’t want to,” Dale said.

  When she started to get up from the couch, Logan waved her back down. “It’s okay. I’m happy to cook, but I need to feed Drake first.” He looked up at the mention of his name and leaned into her.

  “Sorry. I already fed him,” Casey said.

  “No problem.” She eyed Casey and Dale. “What do you want for breakfast?”

  Casey waved her hand in the direction of the kitchen. “Have at it. Whatever you want to cook. Unlike Dale, I have a fully stocked kitchen and a refrigerator filled with real food.”

  “Hey.” Dale elbowed Casey.

  Logan nodded as if accepting a challenge. “All right, then. Breakfast…coming right up.” She patted Drake’s shoulder. “Come on. You can watch and make sure I get it right.”