Ash Bear (Daughters of Beasts Book 3)

by T. S. Joyce

  “Grip it tighter,” he murmured in a deep, gravelly voice that lifted chills onto her skin.

  She tightened her fist and stroked him faster, and he flexed with the pace she kept. She could imagine him coming if they kept going like this. She could see it in her mind—him yelling out and jets of cum covering his chest. She’d never been this turned on. She rocked her clit against him with the rhythm of her stroking his cock.

  The desperation to watch him finish warred with the need for him to be inside her.

  “Oh, fuck, it feels so good,” Grim groaned, his hands gripping her thighs, then her hips. He reached around and unsnapped her bra and yanked the thing from her arms. His hand was massaging her breasts before she even fully realized the relief of being out of the clothing. Grim pulled her forward and there was his mouth, clamped on her breast, his tongue licking her nipple until she was moaning over and over.

  The rattle of his growl vibrated right through her chest, and she couldn’t keep a single thought in her head. She was lost, on some high like she’d never been on before. Nothing in the entire world existed but her and Grim and the fire he was conjuring in her body.

  With a snarl, he sucked hard one last time on her breast and eased back just far enough to pop the button of her jeans. He shoved her feet onto the floorboard to straighten out her legs and shoved the stiff fabric down to her ankles, panties and all. Damn near giddy, she kicked out of the constraints and climbed right back up onto his hips. There wasn’t much room to move in here, but they were making it work fine. His dick touched her sex just right, and she rolled her hips against his erection. She was so wet, she slid right up and down him, and now he was kissing her again. Kissing and biting and nipping and kissing.

  Ash was ready, so she sat up a little on her knees, ignoring the dang seatbelt buckle digging into her skin. She reached between them and gripped his dick again, angling it straight up. And then she slid down him by a couple inches. She hadn’t been with anyone in a long time and should be rusty at this, but being with Grim was natural, like breathing or walking. Ash tensed her legs and pulled off him, then slid back down farther.

  Apparently done with the tease, Grim slid his hands up her thighs, gripped her hips, and slammed her down hard on his cock. He filled her all at once and she gasped out, “Oh my god.” It shocked her at how big he was. She could feel him stretch her insides. He stayed just like that for a few seconds, buried to the hilt inside of her, resting right against her clit. And then he pulled her off a few inches and yanked her back down. Then again and again. Her nerve endings were firing like crazy, and her entire body was tingling with how good it felt.

  “Please,” she whispered. Please what? She didn’t even know what she was begging for, but apparently Grim did because he started bucking into her faster, his arms encircling her as their hips crashed against each other.

  She was loud. She didn’t notice at first, but there was a second of clarity right as her orgasm built to blinding pleasure where she heard herself screaming his name and heard the snarl in his words as he demanded, “Louder! Come on, Ash. Tell me how much you love it.”

  He was warm and she was warm and the vent was warm, and was she on fire? Her skin was crawling, and there was so much pressure in her middle. Her moaning was only getting louder and everything was so bright and “Fuck! I’m going!” she uttered helplessly as she sank her teeth into his collarbone. She didn’t know what she was doing, only that her body was breaking apart in the best way.

  He froze, buried deep inside her, and his dick throbbed hard. And then her insides were hot, too, as they throbbed together, jerking with ecstasy. Her body tensed every time he slowly bucked into her.

  She tasted iron. Iron. Copper. Smelled like pennies. Oh no.

  Her eyes flew open, and she released his torn skin and gasped.

  Grim looked cocky as can be in the dim porch light that illuminated them from behind. His chest was heaving with his labored breath, and he had a thin sheen of sweat along his shoulders. A trickle of crimson snaked its way down his left pec, right over his heart.

  There was one good-sized space left where he didn’t have a tattoo filled in yet, right on his collar bone, and what had she done? Given him another gosh-dang injury! A mark!

  “I didn’t mean to hurt you!” she rushed out. Why was she still having an orgasm? She didn’t deserve the pleasure!

  “Oh, that wasn’t you that hurt me. That was your bear. You’re a little monster yourself, aren’t you? Listen to her.” His grin grew bigger and more sinful.

  Her throat was scratchy from the growl in it, and she swallowed hard. That didn’t stop the noise. “Oh, toot!”

  Grim looked scandalized. “What the fuck is a tewt?” he asked, putting a funny accent on the word. She would’ve laughed if she didn’t hate herself right now.

  “Well, I was trying not to cuss right when we were…you know…”

  “Say fucking.”

  “When we were fucking,” she whisper-screamed. “So I said ‘toot’ instead of ‘shit.’ You’re bleeding really bad!” She reached for her purple sweater and pressed it against the bite, but he swatted it away. She growled louder and put it back.

  “You’re going to ruin your sweater, and it’s fine. You really bit me, Good Girl.”

  “Why are you smiling like that?” she asked, utterly frustrated.

  Grim shrugged. “I dunno.”

  But he did because she could sense lies, and he hadn’t even tried to hide the lie in his tone.

  She sighed fast and heavy and patted the bite with the sweater, but she’d bitten him really bad. “It’s going to scar, and that makes me no better than the people who hurt you. I have some money in savings. I can pay for a tattoo to camouflage it. I’m so sorry!”

  All of her words tumbled out like she’d said one long word, but he seemed to understand her just fine because he said, “I’m not sorry.”

  Was she crying? She was so uncomfortable and tingly, and her body didn’t make any sense so she pressed her fingertips to her closed eyes but they came back dry. “You’re confusing me.”

  “Am I?”

  “Yes! And I…I…” Everything was so hot. Like someone had started a bonfire under the SUV. “I’m…burning up,” she punched out through her panting. “Feel my forehead. Do I have a fever? I think I need to…do something.” She couldn’t inhale a good breath. Felt like someone was standing on her chest while holding a mountain.

  Now Grim looked concerned, but she didn’t have time to make him feel better. She had to make herself feel better first. Her skin was crawling like there were ants all over her. She shoved open the door and poured out of there like a Jell-O casserole out of a mold. Ash hit the snowy ground on her hands and knees and the first snap of breaking bone was like a gunshot in the dark.

  “Oh, nooooo,” she murmured quietly as she realized the awful thing that was happening.

  The bear was coming. The bear was coming, and Grim would never forget this as the climax of their love-making and everything was terrible. She’d never figured out how to reverse a Change, though, and she couldn’t put her broken bones back together until the bear decided she could Change back to her human form, so she gritted out, “I’m sorry,” right before she stopped fighting. But the stupid Change was happening too slowly, so she rolled over onto her back and stared apologetically at Grim as he got out of the SUV.

  “Are you okay?” he asked.

  “Your dick is really pretty,” she whispered. Hurry up and Change! This hurts. “Oh,” she croaked out, “can you tell me if my bear is blue?”

  Grim was fighting a smile as he knelt beside her.

  “Be careful. I’m very dangerous.”

  “I think I’ll take my chances,” he said, moving her hair out of her face. “Why would you be a blue bear?”

  “Because that’s the real reason I let the hair school dye it blue, so I could see if I turn into a blue bear. I thought that would be kind of cool…”

  “Oh,
lord,” he said, laughing.

  “I’m very serious right now. Oooouuuuuhhhh,” she groaned, curling in on herself as her spine started reshaping. “Your dick did this to me.”

  Grim snorted, and then he was laughing way too loud and hurting her head. “This is all on you. Your bear is like a little wrecking ball. She bit me, and now she’s performing the slowest Change in the history of shifters.”

  “Everything huuuurts,” she said, gripping her stomach. “This is my punishment for hurting you. This is karma.”

  But Grim wasn’t laughing anymore, and when she looked up at him, he looked white as a ghost. “Grim?”

  “Ash, I think you should…” He buckled. Or imploded. She didn’t understand what her eyes saw. It made no sense to her brain. He was a tattooed, mohawked behemoth of a man, and then suddenly, he wasn’t there anymore. There was no transition; he was just a lion.

  The animal towered over her, and she froze. She was mid-Change so what could she do to defend herself? Nothing. Not a damn thing. She was dead. This was how she was going to die—butt naked in the snow. She was going to die before she found out if the blue hair dye worked. Before she got to eat Dad’s famous turkey-shaped pan of pizza rolls for Thanksgiving dinner this month. Before she had kids or even had sex a second time with Grim, and that part seemed just mean that she was going to be snuffed out before more Grim-dick.

  But when he looked down at her frozen body, he didn’t look pissed. Instead, his eyes were bright green.

  He curled his lips back from those long, razor-sharp teeth and arched his head toward the sky before he let off a low, steady roar. Then another and another.

  Something was happening to her body. The bear was reacting to the bellowing calls of the lion. Ash broke faster, Changed faster. Her bones reshaped and her muscles stretched and, in a flurry of pain and a smattering of pops, her bear came to be. She laid on the ground panting, eyes closed tight as the roaring died off. It echoed a few times through the mountains, growing softer and farther away with each one. Grim had called her animal from her. How was that even possible? He wasn’t her Alpha. She was still pledged to the Boarlanders, the Crew she’d grown up in.

  But here was Grim, doing Alpha shit, like prying a bear from her to stop her pain.

  The bite on his shoulder was still bleeding, and if she could blush in this body, she would. His entire hide was marked up with scars. He had a thick black mane, and his glowing eyes were steady on her. Every step he took toward her was pure power.

  Okay, if he bit her, she deserved it because she’d bit him first. And…karma.

  But when he pressed his face against the scruff of her neck, she didn’t feel the piercing of his sharp canines. No. He ran his tongue along her fur a few times and then sauntered off toward the woods.

  She stood and shook the final tingles of the Change from her fur. One peek at her black paws, and she grumbled a little growl. The blue hadn’t worked. She was still just a plain dark-furred grizzly. But bright side…Grim stopped up ahead and turned to look over his shoulder at her. I’m waiting for you. Come on.

  Ash trotted after him, happy that he was a book she could read when he was an animal, too. He was the best story. She bolted the last few steps and gave him a playful swat on his rump. He didn’t even hiss at her as he started stalking toward the woods again. His lion still felt like a dominant brawler, and his scarred-up body would probably be intimidating to anyone else, but not to Ash. She loved every single thing about him.

  This was the fastest any 10:10 wish had ever come true.

  She’d wished he would stay The Good, and look at his bright green eyes as he walked right beside her, completely calm, attention casting her way every few steps.

  10:10 really worked! Next time she would wish for more Grim-dick.

  Chapter Fifteen

  Ash couldn’t sleep.

  Beside her, Grim slept soundly, breath heavy and steady. He didn’t even twitch, probably because of how well she’d put him to sleep. They’d stayed in the woods for hours. It was one of those magical nights. The Reaper had never shown up. Only The Good. They’d played and hunted a little but hadn’t been serious about it. Mostly they explored together. And when they got sleepy, they made their way back to the house and Changed in the front yard. She’d gotten cold, but Grim had scooped up her naked body like she weighed no more than a bouquet of daffodils. And then he walked her right inside, got ready for bed, and then tucked her up tight against him.

  “Turn over,” she’d said, and he had. She’d ran her fingernails up and down his back until his body relaxed and his breathing deepened. He was hugging a pillow, and she hugged him.

  But even though the back scratches had relaxed her, too, she couldn’t make herself sleep because then she would lose minutes with him.

  He had booked a flight for tomorrow at 12:05 pm, and it scared her, the thought she might never see him again.

  He was already so important to her existence.

  He would leave tomorrow, and Juno and Remi would leave with their mates as soon as Rhett was done recording his album. Ash would be left here alone again, nursing a big empty hole in her heart. When people got left behind, they didn’t just cease to exist. They still had lives and hours to fill during the day, jobs and struggles. They still had sadness and joy. They still lived day in and day out, missing whoever had left them.

  She didn’t want to go back to that.

  Her eyes teared up, and she pressed her palm against his warm, strong back in the dark. She rubbed it in a gentle circle, just to remind herself that it wasn’t time for loneliness yet. He was here.

  “Come with me,” Grim said. But his voice was deep and dark and sounded like a demon.

  Ash froze as something heavy wafted through the air and settled onto her skin. It felt like darkness. Ash leaned up just enough to see his reflection in the dresser mirror across the room. All she could see was glowing gold eyes. The Reaper. He was awake.

  “I know you’re killing me,” he said.

  Ash snuggled her naked body right up against him and laid a soft kiss on his back. “I don’t want you to go.”

  A soft rumble vibrated against her cheek. “You don’t want Grim to go.”

  “No,” she whispered. “I mean, I don’t want to kill you. You’re important.”

  His growl was constant now. Soft but constant.

  “I love Grim,” she murmured. “And that means all of him. You included. I think he needs you and The Good both. It just hurts him when he only has you. When there’s no balance.”

  He swallowed audibly in the dark and a rough, calloused hand cupped hers, pressed it against his stomach.

  “If you kill me, it’s okay. I still want you to come.”

  “Reaper,” she whispered thickly, squeezing her eyes closed against the tears that wanted to come out. A strong man should hear when he’s doing right. “I love you.”

  Grim tensed, then his hand went limp against hers and fell back to the mattress. His breathing steadied out once more. When she looked back at his reflection, he was asleep again.

  With a sigh, she relaxed back onto her pillow, but she didn’t take her hand away. Grim was on a journey, and she had this instinct that things would change for him.

  He was growing, and she was going to miss it.

  She was going to miss the best chapters in his book.

  Chapter Sixteen

  A sick day. Nursing a broken heart counted as a sick day, right? Audrey had let her off the hook so easy, too.

  Grim was really gone. He’d had to be the Reaper all morning to prepare for a flight out to Tarian Pride territory, but she couldn’t Change again so soon. So she’d sat on the porch on this frosty morning she would never forget.

  She cupped her mug of hot coffee in her hands and shrugged deeper into the blanket. He’d said goodbye a half an hour ago, kissed her lots, but she was still here, stuck in a way, as her bear waited for her lions to come back. She’d done this for weeks when Juno had gone
, and the same happened when Remi left.

  Ash was careful of the people she chose, but when she picked one, her heart picked them for always.

  The sound of a truck engine rumbled through the woods, and she sat up straighter, listening. It wasn’t the SUV engine, though. It was another familiar man coming to see her. Bash Kane. That was the sound of Dad’s new Raptor. She was pretty sure he’d bought it so he could match Clinton. They’d been great friends for years. They fought like a couple of old sisters, but when push came to shove, they always had each other’s backs.

  Clinton had a white one, but Dad had gotten one in the same shade of gunmetal gray as the old Dodge sitting in front of her cabin. His favorite color was orange, but for rigs, he liked dark gray.

  He came barreling through the clearing like a bat out of hell (she’d never figured out what that saying meant, but Mom said it a lot) like he always did. He did three donuts in his truck, the tires spewing dirt and snow, and then he pulled up to her house and skidded to a stop.

  “I don’t know why I waited so long to get me one of these,” Dad said as he hopped out of the jacked-up truck.

  “Because they cost more than if you sold all your organs on the black market,” she reminded him, still unable to move from her seat. It was like her butt cheeks were frozen right here until Grim returned.

  Dad was a sight for sore eyes, another saying she didn’t understand. Sore eyes sounded like a terrible thing. He was tall and built like a brick house, and his hair was black like her natural color. Mom had always said Ash was the spitting image of him, down to her eye color and everything. Except Dad had a great big black beard and looked like a mountain man, and Ash sure hoped she didn’t look like a mountain man.

  Never the quiet person, Dad stomped right on up her stairs and took a seat next to her so hard, for a second she thought the swing would give. She’d reinforced it with double chains, but Dad was a very robust man.