Ruined Mercy

by Brook Wilder

  She was going to be the fucking death of me. “I don’t like it.”

  “I don’t care,” she laughed, pushing her hair out of her face. “This is what I want to do. I’ve already told my parents. They took it like I had imagined they would, but I really think they are interested in what I am going to be learning.”

  “What about your college?” I forced out. “Don’t tell me you are giving up on that.”

  Sabrina shook her head. “I am going to finish my degree, just online. After all, I can’t help if I’m in another city.”

  My jaw was clenched so tightly I thought it would break. “I don’t have a say in this?”

  Sabrina placed her hand on her hip, looking at me with those wide eyes of hers. “I don’t know. Do you think you should?”

  I wanted to tell her yes. I wanted to tell her I hated that she joined the club, that she would be in danger more times than I could protect her.

  But then it hit me what she was asking, and an altogether different feeling crossed over me.

  Sabrina was asking me if I wanted to be in a real relationship with her.

  This Sabrina. Not the woman I had taken out of that house weeks ago. This Sabrina had grown stronger, more confident, and now she was going to be a Hell’s Bitch.

  I couldn’t believe it. “Why are you doing this?” I asked instead. “Why are you prospecting when we’re the ones that caused all of this in your life?”

  Sabrina heaved a sigh. “I don’t know. I did a lot of thinking while you were lying in here.” She laughed. “Don’t think I joined because of you. I’m not one of those crazed stalkers.”

  I grinned. “I don’t think you are.”

  She reddened and for a moment, I was able to see through her bravado. Yeah, the other Sabrina was still in there somewhere.

  “Okay well, I realized I don’t have anything in my life outside of my parents and my college education. I have no friends, no one I call up or even see on a regular basis. These past few weeks, they have shown me what I am missing in life.”

  I could hear the emotion in her voice as she spoke about our club. I wanted to say I felt the same way about her, but I was fucking scared shitless to do so.

  On the other hand, I didn’t want to live without her. There wasn’t a bone in my body that believed I could honestly look at the woman at my bedside and tell her to walk away.

  Because if she did, I wouldn’t be able to breathe right.

  Now I had to tell her. “Sabrina,” I started, my voice harsh even to my own ears. “You got someone now. You got me.”

  “Do I?” she asked softly. “Do I really, Harrison?”

  I gave her a crooked smile. “Yeah, you do. I don’t want to watch you walk away from me. I want to go home after they let me out of this joint and know you are waiting for me.”

  Tears glimmered in her eyes. “Oh Harrison.”

  But I wasn’t finished. “I’ve led a rough life. I lost someone years ago and I’ve blamed myself ever since. I can’t give you the life you deserve, but I can give you a happy one.”

  A tear slid down her cheek and I wanted to wipe it away, but was afraid to move lest the bulldog nurse come charging in. “Damn, I want to touch you.”

  Sabrina reached out and touched my hand, wrapping hers around it. “I’ll help.”

  I held her hand. “So, you will stay?”

  “I’ll stay,” she answered, wiping the tears away. “But I’m going to need you to get an apartment. Kristina, ah, Widow Maker says you can’t stay in the rooms anymore.”

  I chuckled then groaned, feeling the pull on my chest. “Damn, that hurts.”

  “You’re not supposed to be laughing,” Sabrina said with a smile on her face.

  I squeezed her hand, wishing I wasn’t in the position I was in currently so I could show her how I really felt. “You just wait until I’m seventy-five percent, princess. I’m gonna fuck the daylights outta you.”

  “Harrison,” she whispered, looking around the room. “Oh my God. I can’t believe you just said that out loud.”

  Yeah, my nerdy little princess was still in there. “You better get used to it. I won’t be holding back any longer.”

  “You were holding back?” she asked. “I don’t believe it.”

  I grinned, rubbing my thumb over hers. “Just wait and see, princess. Just wait and see.”

  Chapter 21

  Sabrina

  One Month Later

  “Are you sure this is fucking okay? Maybe I should have worn the green one.”

  I smiled at Harrison, taking in his blue shirt, one that brought out the little blue flecks in his normally golden eyes. “You look fine. They are going to love you.”

  He snorted, clenching my hand in his. “That I doubt. I’m not exactly the type of guy you should be bringing to meet your parents. Besides, I am the one who kidnapped you in the first place.”

  He had me there. “Well I just know, okay? Just, can you make sure you curb your swearing in front of my mom? She doesn’t like most of the words you say.”

  Harrison burst into laughter as he pulled the truck into the driveway. “Which ones? Fuck, shit, or damn?”

  I rolled my eyes. “All of the above. Please? For me?”

  Putting the truck in park, he looked over at me. “Only if you say all of the above when we are back home.”

  “You are such a funny man,” I answered, reaching for the door handle. He liked to tease me about my vanilla vocabulary, though I had learned quite a bit from living with him for the last month. “Come on. Mom likely has dinner ready.”

  Harrison let go of my hand and I climbed out of the truck, adjusting my dress so that it fell gracefully around my ankles. Today I was the daughter my parents knew, leaving my club persona behind.

  Not that I was a bad club biker by any means. I had spent the last month understanding what being a Jester was all about. The first day I picked up a gun, I thought Harrison was going to have a heart attack right then and there.

  It probably didn’t help that I had pointed it at him without thinking. I had learned really quickly not to point at anyone I didn’t want to kill.

  That wasn’t all, though. I had taken the old computer system for the Jesters and revamped it, coming up with ideas to run past Chains about how to collect the inventory and document the cash flow coming through the club. So far, he seemed excited about my ideas.

  And Harrison. Oh my, he had been unbelievable.

  I walked around the front of the truck and he grabbed my hand again, pulling me close to brush his lips against mine. “If I start swearing, that means I’m done.”

  “You are going to be fine,” I said, resting my forehead against his briefly. “Are you trying to tell me that a big bad enforcer can’t handle meeting parents?”

  “I’m telling you that this is probably the scariest thing I’ve ever fucking done.”

  Laughing, I pulled away from him, tugging on his hand to start up the sidewalk. “Come on you big baby. You are making this harder than it really is.”

  “I’ll tell you what’s hard right now.”

  I ignored him, though inside a thrill shot through me like white lightning. It had taken some getting used to, having Harrison in my bed constantly, especially for the last three weeks. He had been put on light duty by the doctor, which meant he couldn’t do anything he wanted to do. I had put him on apartment duty, taking the small apartment we had found together and making it into a home.

  A home. I had a home with the man I was rapidly falling in love with. I was learning more and more about Harrison and who he really was. Now I couldn’t imagine the man who had broken into my parents’ home and kidnapped me. Harrison had grown softer around me, taking any and every opportunity to just be in my presence whenever it was just the two of us.

  I had even gotten him hooked on a few primetime TV shows, curled up against him as we watched them together like a normal couple. He liked to say he didn’t watch them, but I knew he was lying to me and
himself. He secretly enjoyed it all.

  Which made me unbelievably happy. It was crazy how much my life had changed, but I remained the same on the inside.

  That and Harrison wouldn’t hear of me not finishing my degree, even helping me study for my online classes. Of course, there wasn’t a lot of studying that ended up happening when he helped, but I was grateful, nevertheless.

  My life was great.

  We reached the door and I knocked, looking around the neighborhood. The police had put my mom and dad in witness protection until they could ensure their safety from the cartel, which meant a two hour drive from Castillo to see them. I knew it was for the best right now, but I still missed my childhood home and seeing them every day.

  The door opened nearly immediately, and my mom was throwing her arms around me, hugging me tightly. “You’re here! I’m so glad to see you.”

  Tears pricked my eyes as I hugged her back, her familiar smell settling me. “I’m glad to be here, Mom.”

  She pulled back, wiping at her eyes. “Well, you look lovely Sabrina. Your father will be so happy to see you. I’ve made your favorite.”

  I reached for Harrison’s hand, pulling him close to me. “Mom, this is Harrison Parker.”

  She eyed him, no doubt taking in his tall form, the hint of his tattoo on his neck, and thinking how her daughter had gotten involved with someone who was so completely different than her. I hadn’t told them too much about how we had met, keeping the fact that he had been my kidnapper completely out of the picture.

  The less they knew, the better it was for everyone.

  “Harrison,” she finally said. “It’s nice to meet you. Won’t you come in?”

  “Yes ma’am,” he answered as she turned and walked away. “She fucking hates me already.”

  I laughed, tugging on his hand. “She might, but I don’t, and that’s all that matters.” It was all that mattered. My feelings for Harrison were hard to explain, but I knew I couldn’t live without him in my life. I didn’t want to think about what was going to happen when he went back to the club full time, but for now, I was content to live in our own little world, making a life together.

  What happened in the future, well, only time would tell.

  ***

  It was well after dark by the time we got back to the apartment, Harrison unlocking the door and letting me step inside the cool interior. I kicked off my shoes at the foyer, padding across the floor while pulling my hair down. The visit had gone surprisingly well, my parents keeping their conversation with Harrison light and friendly, and well away from the fact that he was in a biker club.

  And Harrison. He had been awesome. I had never seen my mom so enthralled with someone before, but he had won her over before we even finished dinner.

  I was a lucky, lucky girl.

  “God, I am stuffed,” Harrison said, rubbing his stomach. “Your mom, she’s a fucking awesome cook.”

  I placed my purse on the counter and turned to face him, giving him a grin. “See? You asked me where I had gotten my skills from.”

  “I believe it,” he answered, walking toward me. My pulse fluttered uncontrollably as he trapped me between his body and the counter behind me, the smell of his cologne nearly driving me wild. “Now, there’s only one more thing I want.”

  I sucked in a breath. “What’s that?”

  “You.”

  Reaching up, I encircled my arms around his neck. “Well then, I’m guessing that I want you, too.”

  His grin was wolfish. “Good answer, princess.”

  I stood up on my tip toes and brushed my lips over his, hearing him groan in response. I would never get tired of kissing him, touching him like this. Harrison deepened the kiss and I hung on for dear life as his tongue tangled with mine, sending shivers down my spine at what was going to happen next.

  But Harrison didn’t undress me. Instead he pulled back, his breathing harsh. “I gotta say something.”

  Surprised, I let him go. “Okay.”

  He seemed to struggle with getting his words out and I grew concerned, worried that my happiness was about to be cut short. Had I been wrong in taking him to my parents? I had just wanted to show them that I was happy with Harrison and that they didn’t need to worry about me.

  Now, my plan might have backfired.

  “I love you.”

  Stunned, I tried to register his words. “What?”

  He hung his head. “I love you. I know it’s soon to be saying that shit, but hell, Sabrina, I can’t live without you. I’ve never felt this way before, and before I start back at the club, I wanted you to know.”

  My heart crumbled in my chest and I threw my arms around him. “I love you, too. I was so scared to tell you, not wanting you to think I was moving too fast.”

  The rest of my words were cut off by his rough kiss, pushing me against the counter. His tongue thrust into my mouth and I whimpered, my hands already pulling the dress shirt over his head. I wanted to touch him, to make sure I wasn’t dreaming up this moment in my life.

  Harrison loved me.

  He tore his mouth from mine long enough to pull the shirt over his head and I did the same with my dress, our bodies coming back together in a frenzied rush. Harrison’s hands were all over my body, cupping my breasts as he kissed a path down my jaw to my neck. I arched against his touch, giving him better access to the sensitive skin there, my hands roaming over the chest I had come to know so well.

  My hands found the waistband of his jeans, making quick work of his button and freeing him.

  “God,” he said against my collarbone. “Touch me, Sabrina.”

  So, I did. I grabbed the length of him in my hand and stroked it lightly the way I knew he liked, feeling him shudder in response.

  “Hell yeah,” he said, bracing himself against the counter. “Like that, princess.”

  I grinned as I explored every inch of him, feeling my own body respond in kind. When Harrison slid his hand into my underwear I moaned, knowing he would find my aching wet center ready for his touch.

  He did that to me.

  “Damn,” he whispered, his finger doing delicious things to my clit. “I want to be in there.”

  I dropped my hand, pressing my body against his. “Then let’s make that happen.”

  With a growl, Harrison pulled me down the hall to our bedroom, kicking off his shoes to remove his jeans. I pulled my underwear off and squeaked as he slid into me, filling me to the core.

  “Is this what you want?” I asked softly, my hands playing over his broad shoulders.

  “Yeah,” he said, moving inside me. “Now I want you to scream my name, Sabrina.”

  I swallowed. “Demanding, aren’t you?”

  “Very.”

  I closed my eyes and concentrated on his movements, feeling my body winding tight in anticipation. I loved this. I loved what Harrison did to me, how he made me feel.

  I had come so close to losing him but now I had no intentions of letting him go.

  Because if something did happen, I would be losing a part of myself.

  The orgasm hit me by surprise, and I did cry out, sobbing Harrison’s name as he picked up the pace, pounding into me and shaking the entire bed. When the next one hit, he stiffened, pouring into me with a hoarse shout.

  It wasn’t until I had drifted back down to earth that Harrison pulled out of me, falling onto the bed next to me.

  “Damn.”

  “I take it that’s a good damn?”

  His chuckle filled the air. “I fucking love it when you swear.”

  I grinned in the darkness as the sweat on my body cooled. “I know. That’s why I don’t do it often.”

  His hand found mine and I intertwined our fingers together.

  “This is good, right?”

  I couldn’t even count how many times he had asked me that one question, as if he expected me to up and leave him at a moment’s notice. It was amazing, really, that someone as tough as Harrison would be worried about
losing someone like me. “Yes, it’s good. It’s great. I love this thing with you.”

  “Good.”

  EPILOGUE

  Somewhere near Castillo

  I ran my hand over the large gun, feeling the cool steel prickle my skin. Touching a gun, even a large one, held the same appeal for me as it always had. For years, I had done exactly what I was doing now, learning all there was about weapons before my deployment to Afghanistan. When I joined the Jesters, it hadn’t been hard to give me my name.