Coming Up for Air

by Amanda Meuwissen

“Ah, I see. You believe them to be meeting there.” Tolly pointed through the many shipping containers at the meet-up spot.

  “Yeah, but if we make any noise or get seen, we’re screwed.”

  “I shall go alone, then,” Tolly said, and suddenly he was stripping, right there at the water’s edge.

  “What are you doing?”

  “I can listen more easily from the water.” He already had his jacket and sweater off, then kicked away his shoes and slipped his pants and underwear down his legs. “They will not see me. Trust me.”

  Leigh was at a loss for words, scrambling to think of something, anything to prevent Tolly from diving headfirst into the water, naked, in the middle of the day—but then it was over and Tolly was gone.

  What if he never came back? What if they saw him, saw what he was and….

  It would be crazy for Leigh to follow, so he ended up pacing back and forth between the crates for ten solid minutes before he started seriously considering jumping in after Tolly. When he heard a splash, he turned to see Tolly climbing up from where he’d gone in, looking satisfied and no worse for wear.

  “We are in luck,” Tolly said, casually returning to his clothes to put them on over wet skin. “They were talking about more than drug smuggling, as you had hoped. There was a Moretti informant present. He was concerned about the men who returned to their base injured with no memory of what happened to them.”

  The goons Tolly roughed up. Leigh should have expected that a concussion and a broken arm wouldn’t go unnoticed, but hopefully it just made things more confusing on the Moretti side.

  “They think it careless and dangerous to send anyone else after you for the time being, but Jake and Rosa are expected to meet with Vincent Moretti soon, within the week, once the umm… heat dies down, they said. They also mentioned another snitch, but I believe there is only one other.”

  “Who?” Leigh asked eagerly.

  “They did not say a name, merely mentioned a… runner. Not like you, someone inconsequential. This other person told the Morettis that you were alive and at your apartment. That is why those men came.”

  It wasn’t Selene or Mark, then. Had to be one of the nobodies hoping to rise in rank. That didn’t narrow it down, but it was a start. Leigh was going to have to get cozy with some of the lackeys.

  “Jake and Rosa were told to lie low and to wait for a message about when and where to meet Vincent Moretti. We must be vigilant, Leigh, but that would likely be your best chance to strike at him.”

  It would be. If Leigh learned about the meet-up in time, he could set the perfect trap. No one suspected they knew about the snitches. The only people who had any idea were Leigh, Tolly, and Alvin.

  “Did I do well?” Tolly asked once he was dressed, though he looked like a drowned rat and definitely in need of fresh clothes.

  “You did very well,” Leigh said. “But next time, no diving into the water without warning me.”

  LEIGH FELT comfortable returning home without fear of another ambush after Tolly’s eavesdropping, but he still listened to Alvin’s advice about the strip mall outside Sweeney or Moretti territory. Tolly was somewhat drier by the time they got there, though a few store clerks still shot them dirty looks.

  They didn’t spend an excessive amount of time, just enough to get Tolly the essentials. He looked like a kid at Christmas anyway, when Leigh told him he could choose whatever he wanted.

  Tolly had simple tastes but gravitated toward more color than Leigh, especially red. It was his color for sure, complimenting his dark hair and eyes. One signature piece Tolly fell in love with was a red bomber jacket with a black collar and cuffs.

  “Thank you,” Tolly said when they left, changed into one of his new outfits and the jacket while his wet clothes were in a separate bag. Somehow, like before, he didn’t seem in need of a shower after his dip in the river. He was fresh and clean, hair dried already into the perfect coif.

  “Don’t mention it.”

  “Why not? It bears mentioning since I am truly grateful.”

  “It’s an expression. It means it was my pleasure, so don’t get mushy about it.”

  Tolly tittered a giggle, which was almost as captivating as his singing. “Language is fascinating. There are always new turns of phrase to learn.”

  Leigh wished he had that sort of zest for life, but then, being around Tolly made it easier to appreciate the little things.

  When they returned home, there were a few Post-its on Leigh’s door, like usual, which he’d deal with later. He needed to clear his head first.

  “Leigh, can you elaborate more on what ‘juvie’ refers to?” Tolly asked after they had arranged his clothes into spaces in Leigh’s dresser and closet, which felt oddly intimate, but where else were they going to put it? “I know it is short for ‘juvenile hall,’ but I am not sure I understand.”

  “It’s jail for minors. Kids under eighteen who get in trouble end up there sometimes. Not a nice place really, since it’s meant to be a punishment.”

  “I see. The laws in your world are quite complicated.”

  “What, no baby jail for merfolk?”

  “No. If a child goes against their parents or merfolk ways, they are hunted and killed just like an adult.”

  Leigh froze with a fresh shiver clawing up his spine. He kept forgetting that Tolly’s people were dangerous and cruel, however beautiful they must be if they looked like him. He’d seen how strong Tolly was, but it was still difficult to picture his people as killers.

  When a knock sounded at the door, Leigh’s instincts were to tense before he reminded himself that they should be safe for now.

  It was Ralph he saw through the peephole. The kid didn’t look like he wanted to continue their fight from last night. Quite the opposite; he seemed cowed and nervous.

  “What’s your problem?” Leigh opened the door. “You get into trouble again?”

  “You’re home.” Ralph sagged in relief. “You weren’t here earlier.”

  “I have a life outside this place, you know. What were you coming around earlier for? Weren’t you at school?”

  “Most of the time.”

  “Ralph.”

  “I’m sorry I got bitchy last night,” Ralph said, pushing past Leigh into the apartment. “I was pissed and not thinking. But sometimes you rag on me even worse than my dad.”

  Leigh resisted the urge to fall into that compulsion now since this wasn’t the best apology. “It’s fine. But you get why I don’t want you turning out like me.”

  “I know. Just doesn’t seem like I got many options.”

  Leigh let the door shut behind him and looked Ralph up and down. He was a mess of tension in his gangly limbs. Must have had a rough day. “You like solving mysteries, good at sneaking around and sleight of hand. Doesn’t mean you have to be a thief. Might make a good detective someday.”

  Ralph finally looked Leigh in the eyes only to ooze cynicism. “My kindergarten transcripts said the same thing my teachers tell me now. ‘Does not respect authority. Does not play well with others.’”

  Sounded about right. Leigh’s would have said the same. “Who says you gotta work for anyone but yourself?”

  It might have been a romantic suggestion, being a private eye, but romantic was what Ralph needed right now, a bit of a dream to cling to, something to strive for that would ignite a fire in him to get out of this place. It seemed to work, too, because his eyes glittered at the possibility.

  “Hello, Ralph.” Tolly came out of the bedroom. “How are you today?”

  The way Ralph relaxed further at Tolly’s appearance said he approved of his continued presence. “Wired. But good. Nice jacket.”

  “Thank you. Leigh bought it for me.”

  “He did, huh?” Ralph said, returning to the mischievous shit Leigh was used to.

  “Mind your own love life,” Leigh snapped, then flushed when he realized what he’d said. He didn’t know how to handle the hope that filled Tolly’s eyes when th
at was the only way he’d ever let a phrase with “love” in it pass his lips.

  “Hey, Hurley,” Ralph said more quietly. “Are you still in deep with Sweeney?”

  “I don’t want you involved—”

  “I know, I know, just wanna be sure I don’t have to worry about you. Even if you do have a bodyguard around,” he said like he still didn’t believe that was Tolly’s function.

  “I got some reprieve, all right? No one’s gonna come looking for me for a while.”

  “Good.”

  There was another knock before Alvin called, “You guys having a party in there without me?” and barged in without waiting, carrying pizza boxes with a bag over his arm.

  “You got Tolly’s stuff already?” Leigh asked.

  “Nah, not till tomorrow, but I figured you could use a night to relax. Hey, Ralphy-boy. You eat? Got plenty. Plus RoboCop 1 and 2 from the bargain bin. You know you want to be educated tonight.”

  “Hell yes.” Ralph flocked to Alvin like the bad example he was. “All over the yes. I haven’t seen those yet.”

  “That’s because you’re still in diapers,” Leigh said, but he wasn’t against the idea. In fact, he almost wanted to hug Alvin for it.

  “The first one is quite violent for someone so young.” Tolly came forward to protest.

  “He’ll be fine. You’ve seen RoboCop?”

  “I prefer the second one.”

  Tamer and more tongue-in-cheek made sense coming from Tolly. “Pizza and mini movie marathon it is,” Leigh said.

  He was interrupted a few times to make good on those Post-it notes that had been on his door, but for the most part, Leigh got to relax, eat pizza, and watch flicks with his friends like someone almost normal.

  When he came back from his last house call about a third of the way into RoboCop 2, Tolly was on the sofa with Alvin, teaching him more signs, while Ralph remained glued to the screen, sitting probably too close to the TV.

  “How do you do ‘beautiful’ again?” Alvin asked, and Tolly fanned his fingers across his face.

  “Beautiful. See?”

  Alvin copied him. “Beautiful.”

  “I will teach you more. No need to rush. Simply be open with Cary. Talk to him. And when the time is right, you will woo him.”

  Leigh cracked open a soda he’d grabbed from the fridge, and Alvin turned to look at him.

  “You’re keeping this guy around, right?”

  Tolly’s proud expression made it impossible for Leigh to hold back his own smile.

  “Haven’t come up with a reason to get rid of him yet.”

  TOLLY WAS succeeding and it had only been a couple of days. He had until the next full moon to complete the pact, but the night he saved Leigh had been some days after the last full moon. Tolly could feel the time he had left almost like a ticking clock in his head.

  Twenty-four days and counting. It had to be enough.

  Trust and companionship had come easily between them, but Tolly needed more—he needed a true vow of love to stay with Leigh forever. It was no secret that Leigh desired him. Tolly could feel his gaze on him when Leigh thought he was not paying attention. He could feel Leigh’s desire in their connection, too, a spike of heat, of affection, but despite the lingering gazes at Tolly standing in his underwear at the edge of the bed that night, Leigh simply crawled under the covers and made no move to touch him or draw him close.

  Should Tolly make a move instead? He wanted to but feared scaring Leigh away if he pushed too much too fast. He had to be calculating and patient.

  That was difficult, however, when he could hear the steady beat of Leigh’s heart pounding so close to him, and when a mere glance afforded him the most gorgeous sight. Leigh’s expression while asleep was young and smooth and unencumbered. Tolly wanted to keep that sort of peace on his face always.

  Peace was difficult as well, it seemed, because Tolly woke the next morning to muffled whimpers and rustling of the sheets. He had burrowed down in his sleep again, curled up beneath the covers, but when he crawled up into the light, he found Leigh still asleep, gripping the sheets in clenched fists like he was having a nightmare.

  Merfolk did not dream. Perhaps that was why Tolly sought movies and other storytelling so often, because he had so few outlets to escape reality. He did not want Leigh to have nightmares. Dreams should be sweet.

  “Shhh,” he hushed him, crawling closer, bold enough to allow the lines of their bodies to become flush as he stroked a hand down Leigh’s cheek. “You are safe. Nothing can harm you while I am here. Be calm.” He hummed a quiet tune meant to soothe, and his magic entered Leigh with a relaxed sigh.

  Tolly smiled. He should have rolled away then, given Leigh space, but it felt good to be in contact with him, to touch his cheek and watch his face as his eyes blinked open to reveal that deep yet icy blue like an arctic ocean.

  For a moment, Tolly worried Leigh would pull away, but he understood that it had been Tolly who chased off his nightmares. Leigh had been so scared, like a shock of dread in Tolly’s chest through their connection. Now he was content and grateful for Tolly’s song.

  He lifted a hand to place over Tolly’s on his cheek, and Tolly felt that spike of heat again, of affection, of arousal. He could not deny how affected he was by it, drawn to Leigh because of their proximity and the surge of adrenaline still strong from the terrors in his dreams.

  Tolly wondered what the dreams were about, but he was far more interested in the bow of Leigh’s lips.

  He kissed him, a simple press like they had shared in the water, and Leigh’s hand moved to his wrist to squeeze in encouragement as he deepened the kiss with a subtle opening of his mouth.

  Leigh’s tongue felt wonderful against Tolly’s. He wanted to get closer and rolled on top of Leigh to straddle his hips, kissing back deeper still. Tolly wanted more and wanted it now with a hunger he did not think anything else could satisfy.

  Chapter 7

  LEIGH WAS only half awake, but even in his sleepy state, he knew he wanted this—Tolly and the comforting weight atop his hips while they kissed much more deeply than they had when Tolly saved him from drowning.

  Tolly had saved Leigh again only moments ago, his song chasing away the monster that plagued Leigh’s nightmares, because while at first the creature had been vicious and terrifying as it circled him in an endless ocean, Tolly’s song transformed it into something beautiful, elegant and ethereal, like Tolly himself with his glittering tail.

  Leigh had soon realized he was dreaming, eyes opening in the wake of that song to find Tolly against him, lean body pressed to his with a hand at his face. As he kissed Tolly now, slow and heated in the morning light, his mind and surroundings fuzzy, Leigh felt almost like he was still asleep, but this was much sweeter than any dream or monster that wasn’t real.

  He moved his hands to Tolly’s waist to hold him closer, and Tolly responded by grabbing both sides of his face. Scooting lower, he straddled Leigh and rocked his hips forward, brushing his underwear against Leigh’s sleep pants.

  While Tolly ground into him, he slid his hands from Leigh’s face down his chest to the hem of his shirt and pushed up underneath. Leigh’s instinctive urge was to flinch, but Tolly’s touch wasn’t harsh like the world around them; it was kind and giving, like a beacon home.

  They were both starved for contact, but even though Leigh usually shied from what was offered, Tolly dove in headfirst the same way he’d jumped into the river. Their connection—Leigh could feel it, the calm Tolly projected like his soothing song, contrasting the ravenous desire in him to get Leigh’s shirt off. He pushed it up Leigh’s chest as they kissed, but he didn’t want to break away so he drew one hand downward again and slipped beneath his waistband with tentative but curious fingers.

  “Tolly…,” Leigh panted.

  “I want to be inside you.”

  Whoa. “Uhh… Tolly….”

  “Or you inside me. I have no preference,” Tolly said, palming Leigh with only enth
usiasm pouring through their connection. It would be so easy to give in, but one of them had to think sensibly.

  “Hey.” Leigh grabbed Tolly’s wrist to stop him, and wow, did he look even more beautiful kiss-bitten. “There’s a lot of prep and thought and… and supplies we’d need. Plus, I don’t…. It’s, uhh… it’s been a while for me.”

  Tolly blinked as if not fully understanding. “That is all right. It has been forever for me,” he said and leaned in for a kiss.

  Leigh gripped his wrist harder to keep out of reach. “You mean you’ve never….”

  Of course he hadn’t. He hadn’t had legs until now, and he never would have been with one of his own. Leigh wasn’t even sure what Tolly’s anatomy was like when he had his tail out.

  “Does that bother you?” Tolly asked innocently.

  Innocently.

  “No, I’ve just never been with someone who’s… never been with someone. Even my first time, the other person was experienced.”

  “Oh,” Tolly said as though he must have disappointed Leigh. “I will do my best to please you. You can tell me everything you want me to do.”

  There he went sounding like a porno again. “I need to process this.” Leigh pulled Tolly’s hand out of his pants. “We shouldn’t rush, not when you’ve never…. Someone’s first time isn’t always special, but it should be.”

  Tolly sat back on Leigh’s hips with a pout. He had no idea how much that made Leigh want to throw him to the bed. “It would be special if it was with you. But we can wait for the right time if that is what you wish.” He chewed his lip like he needed something to bite to stave off his hunger, and slowly dragged his fingers to the edge of Leigh’s sleep pants again. “May I still touch you?”

  Clearly, Tolly had been sent here by the powers that be to torture him.

  Leigh should’ve said no, even if he desperately wanted to say yes. He didn’t want to take advantage of Tolly’s inexperience, but when Leigh didn’t respond, Tolly teased his fingers beneath the elastic like he very much knew what he was doing.