Hate to Love You (Baker's Bunch Book 1)

by Lily Ryan

  “Speak of the fucking devil,” Doug says.

  My eyes follow his line of vision, just as Callie kisses COLE!

  HOLY FUCKING SHIT!

  Her mouth is on his, and the wind is knocked from me. I can’t swallow. I can’t breathe. My throat constricts. Sharp intense pain rips across my chest. It’s barren. Empty. My once beating heart has been ripped out. Forcibly removed. All that’s left is raw pain.

  I can’t move. I want to. I want to go rip every fucking hair out of her head, but I can’t force my feet to budge. She’s hanging on him like a pathetic fucking leech, touching him, reaching for him as he gets to his feet.

  “Sam?” I think I hear my name, but I’m not sure. All I hear is the blood pounding in my ears. “Sam, what’s wrong?” Abby asks.

  I hate Callie. I fucking hate her. But most of all, I hate the boy I thought I loved. The man I believed would be different from all the other scumbags in my life and never hurt me. I hate the fucking poser I handed my body and soul to. The jackass that promised to be true to me. I fucking hate, hate, HATE Cole Andrews!

  Chapter 11

  Cole

  I want to run to Sam, but I can’t draw attention to myself. Not from Tyler or Callie. Not before I talk to her. I extend each stride and move with urgency. I need to get to her.

  Sam’s headed toward the bathroom. No doubt to avoid me. I don’t care. I can’t let this go. We need to talk right now. If I don’t get there in time, I’ll wait by the door for her to come out. Maybe I’ll follow her in. This is too important. I won’t leave without making this right.

  Seeing the pain in Sam’s eyes sliced me open. Tyler’s not in the equation anymore. Not if it means hurting her. It doesn’t matter if he’s ready for this or not. I need to come clean about us.

  “Sam!” I call, once I’m close enough.

  She doesn’t stop or turn around.

  “Samantha, princess!”

  “Don’t call me that!” She spins on her heal and points at me. “I am NOT your princess. I’m not your anything!”

  Her green eyes are dark. Dangerous. Full of fire and fury. Anger contorts her beautiful face. I’ve never seen her look like this. Ever.

  I’m frozen in place. My voice wavers, “Sam, please, I can—”

  “What? Explain?” She asks in the nastiest, most condescending tone I’ve ever heard. “No. You. Can’t. There isn’t one damn thing you can say that would make me consider forgiving you. You’re a liar, just like my brother and Doug. And a cheat just like my father. I have no room for a piece of shit like you in my life.” She storms into the bathroom.

  I consider following her inside, but then what? She’s clearly not ready to talk, I need her to cool down so she can understand that I did all this, I allowed this to happen, so I could protect her. I did it all for her. For my princess. Losing her was never an option.

  I stand there, with my feet cemented to the ground. What the fuck do I do? I’ve never seen her so angry. I pull my phone out and send her a text message.

  Me: I’m sorry, Sam. Please come out so we can talk.

  There’s no response. I head into the men’s room because I’m afraid I look like some sort of pervert waiting outside the women’s room. I splash water on my face while I wait for her to respond. Nothing.

  I should go back out there, bust into the ladies room and tell Sam the truth. I need to set Callie straight, call her bluff. But then Sam may get hurt and I would have hurt her for no fucking reason. No. That’s not how this is going to go down.

  Callie hurt my girl, now I hurt her.

  *

  I storm out of the men’s room, and only take a few steps when I see Callie coming my way with a pissed off look on her face. She has got to be kidding. She’s acting like we’re a real couple and she’s a jealous shrew.

  Good we can have it out right here, right now.

  “What took you so long?” She asks, coming toe to toe with me.

  “None of your fucking business.”

  “You saw her didn’t you? That mousy little wench.”

  I grab Callie’s upper arm and back her up into the wall of the alcove where the restroom doors are. “Don’t you ever talk about Sam like that!”

  “What’s the matter? Your little fuck hole in a pissy mood because you’re here with me? With someone you’re not ashamed to be seen in public with?” Callie’s voice is loud. Too loud.

  “No worries,” Sam’s voice sounds from behind me. “I’m done with him. You’re more than welcome to my sloppy seconds. And I’ll make sure when I see Hunter tonight that I show him how much better I can make him feel than you can. After all, he thought a backseat fuck with me was worth more than anything you had to offer. In public or private.”

  Callie’s jaw drops. I’d like to say hers is the only one, but mine is on the floor next to hers. Sam’s going to see Hunter later? Who the fuck is Hunter and what the fuck happened in his backseat?

  “He wouldn’t be caught dead with you.”

  “Keep telling yourself that,” Sam shoots an evil smile at Callie. “You know how much he wants me, besides, you shouldn’t mind. You’re with Cole now. I made sure to send that message along to Hunter.”

  Callie lunges forward. I grab her around her waist to stop her from attacking Sam. Callie’s phone rings. She settles down and pulls it from her pocket. Twisting her mouth, she storms passed me with a shove to the chest and slams the door to the ladies room open while she greets whoever is calling.

  “Who’s Hunter?”

  “None of your fucking business.”

  “Don’t be stupid, Sam.”

  “Stupid? Really? Wow, do you have a lot of nerve.” She shakes her head.

  “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. This isn’t what it looks like.”

  “Of course it isn’t. It never is. I misunderstood her skanky lips on yours. That’s all it is, a misunderstanding.”

  Sam’s voice is cold and aloof. So different than the warm, caring girl I’ve known for years.

  “Come with me. You’re brother’s up front. We’ll go tell him. Right now. Then we can work on fixing this.”

  “Fixing this?” Her lips curl up in the corners. “Don’t bother. If you say anything to my brother at this point, all it will do is prove that you’re a selfish son of a bitch, just like every other man.”

  “Where is this coming from? Just a few hours ago you wanted me to tell him.”

  She nods. “A few hours ago I thought you were a decent guy. Thanks for proving me wrong.”

  “You don’t mean that. Once I tell him—”

  “Why would you do that? Why hurt him for no reason? My brother needs a friend. Someone he can count on. Too bad that’s you. You’ll only fuck it up.”

  “Sam—”

  She holds up her hand stopping me. “Don’t risk his progress because you think it’ll help your cause with me. It won’t. There’s nothing between us, Cole. There never was, and there never will be.”

  “That’s bullshit!”

  She ignores me as she pushes past me. I let her because I don’t know how to right this ship. She’s stubborn when she’s mad. I’ll wait her out until she calms down. That’s the only chance I have of reasoning with her. I’ll spend the night at Tyler’s place, and we can figure shit out together, the three of us.

  Callie comes out of the bathroom and narrows her eyes at me.

  “You cost me everything!”

  “Me? What the fuck are you talking about?” I need to set this bitch straight right now. “Until half an hour ago, I didn’t know you existed.”

  “We were working things out until that cunt got to him.”

  I advance on her. I’ve had enough of this bitch, and she needs to change her tune right now. “You do NOT talk about Sam like that. Do you understand?” I’m in her face and she looks uncomfortable. “You’re the one that started this. You and your fucking pictures. So here’s what’s going to happen. You’re going to give me your phone so I could del
ete them, and so help me if anything is put out anywhere, my response to Hunter and everyone in ear shot is going to be you were so desperate to fuck me, you watched and begged to be next. When I turned you down, you wanted revenge and circulated these pics.”

  “No one’s going to believe you.”

  “Really? I have a whole lot of witnesses here that saw you hanging all over me, not the other way around. Test me. I dare you. Let’s see who has the upper hand. Especially with Hunter.”

  Chapter 12

  Samantha

  Vibrations from the loud bass pound like an external heartbeat. I blink my eyes to clear my whacked out vision. It doesn’t help much. I can almost ignore seeing double. What I can’t ignore is the room spinning sideways.

  Maybe I should look for Abby. I agreed to come to the party, but I haven’t seen her since she introduced me to Miguel and Hunter approached me. She probably thinks Hunter is the best thing that could happen to me tonight. No one knows better than Abby that seeing Cole and Callie destroyed me. She’s only listened to me obsess over him non-stop for the last three years.

  Even my best friend doesn’t realize how deep a gash he sliced in my heart. As much as I wanted to confess every dirty secret I have about him and me together, I didn’t. Not out of some sense of obligation to the promise I made to him. That’s gone. I just don’t want my best friend to know what a gullible idiot I am.

  I believed him. I trusted him. And now I’m paying the price.

  Operation Move On has officially begun.

  Hunter hands me another red solo cup. My fifth of the night. I’m starting to think I should’ve stopped at two, but after the second, I still had flash backs of Callie and Cole kissing, and my chest ached with every breath.

  “I’m so glad you messaged me and offered to meet up. It was a nice surprise.”

  “Yeah, me too,” I lie. “I had no idea you even knew who I was until today.”

  “Of course I did,” he smiles. “I know all the beautiful girls. How are you feeling?” Hunter wraps his arm around my waist and pulls me close. It’s not hard to see why Callie’s attracted to him. Even through my crappy vision he looks adorable.

  According to Abby, he’s a half way decent guy too. He definitely has a top spot as one of Bakersfield’s most eligible guys. Abby claims, before Doug and Marcus’ little confession, she’d heard Hunter dumped Callie because he doesn’t want to be linked to her nasty-ass attitude anymore.

  “I’m fucking wasted,” Hunter says, before nuzzling the crook of my neck.

  His lips are foreign to me. I don’t lose myself to them the way I do with Cole’s. They don’t make me shiver and cover all over with goose bumps as they move over my skin. Hunter’s mouth grazes my collarbone, and I giggle instead.

  “I was right about you,” he pulls back and says, with a smile. “I knew you were fun. You just needed to let loose.” His hands slide under my shirt.

  I should stop him. This isn’t who I am, especially not in front of a crowd of people. But I want them all to see us together. I want that bitch to know we hooked up, and I want Cole to know he’s nothing special. Just another guy.

  Besides, Hunter’s cute and I’ve had his undivided attention for the last hour and a half. It’s nice to have someone show an interest in me with other people around, and not just when he’s ready to fuck. Best of all is knowing every time he touches me, it’s like throwing a dagger at Callie and drawing blood.

  Hunter is a good way to forget about Cole. The perfect way. To forget what it felt like to kiss him. To be touched by him. Nothing better than a new set of hands and lips to forget the old ones.

  “Body shots!” A voice in the crowd calls out.

  I look over to the group of guys cheering. A girl I’ve never seen before, stands in front of them in her underwear. She removes her bra with a teasing look and tosses it to the side. She’s left in nothing but a flimsy g-string.

  “Who wants to go first,” she says, not bothered at all that all the guys around her are gawking and closing in.

  A few guys shout “me” at the same time. I have no idea who said it first. I watch as she’s led to a card table a few feet away and lays down on it. The host of the party, Logan, pours brownish alcohol I think is rum, onto the girl’s naval. One of the onlookers joins the fun and licks it off.

  The girl cheers along with the group. Guys close in and I can’t see any more, but I’m intrigued.

  “Titty shots!” Someone from the crowd yells. Alcohol is poured over one breast, and then the other, as two different guys lick it off her.

  “Come on, I know you’re not into this,” hunter wraps his arm around my waist and takes a step in the opposite direction.

  “No. Wait. I want to watch.”

  “I think maybe you drank a little too much,” he says, taking the solo cup away from me.

  I shake my head. I’m starting to feel good. “I think I haven’t drank enough.” I take my cup back and down the rest of the piss-like beer. “How about you?” I ask. “You want to do body shots?”

  “Thanks, but I rather spend my time with you.” He speaks directly into my ear. I giggle in response. He takes this as an invitation to stick his tongue in my ear. I push him away playfully.

  “I was talking about me, silly. Want to do body shots off of me?”

  He narrows his eyes, “Are you serious.”

  “Dead serious.” I drag my teeth over my bottom lip.

  “Fuck yeah!” Hunter pulls me close and kisses me hard on the lips. His tongue pushes its way between them, and I meet it with my own. There’s no funny feeling in my belly. No racing pulse. But kissing him wakens a hunger inside me. So does the feel of his hands on my ass.

  I lift my shirt over my head. I don’t know if anyone else is looking at me, but Hunter’s eyes rake over me with hunger, and that’s all that matters. He doesn’t wait for something to be poured on me, he dips his head to the area between my breasts and drags his tongue down the center of my cleavage as his hands reach around back to the clasp of my bra.

  I close my eyes and savor the sensation. It feels good to be wanted. Until I’m pushed away and stumble backward.

  “What the fuck?” Hunter sounds pissed.

  “Dude, you need to walk away from her.”

  A tall, dark, and dominating figure stands between us. It takes me a few seconds to recognize Zane. We don’t talk much, so I’m not sure what he’s doing or why. With his back to me, he crosses his arms over his chest and waits for Hunter to respond.

  “Nah, man. You’re the one that needs to get the fuck out of here.” Hunter steps toe to toe with him.

  “C’mon, Hunter, I’m looking out for you.”

  “I don’t need you to look out for me. I need you to mind your fucking business.”

  Zane takes hold of Hunter’s arm. “I’m doing this as your friend. Look at her,” Zane glances over his shoulder at me. “She’s fucking trashed. You don’t walk away now, some things going to happen that she’s going to regret. Then what? Then she “Me too’s” you, and your life is screwed.”

  Hunter shakes his head. “She contacted me.”

  “It doesn’t matter. I know her, and this isn’t like her. If her brother hears about this, and that you took advantage of the situation, he’s going to come after you. He’s one of Austin’s friends, and super protective of her.”

  Fuck! I need to stop Zane before he scares Hunter off.

  “Go away, Zane.” I give him a little push, but he doesn’t budge and inch. “No one wants you here.”

  He ignores me, as if I didn’t say a word.

  “I’m not looking for any trouble.” Hunter sounds like he’s wavering. “I just want to have a good time.”

  “I get that. But I’m telling you, this good time is going to haunt you.”

  “What do you want, Samantha?” Hunter asks.

  “I want you.” I push around Zane and take Hunter’s hand. “I want to have a good time with you. If it’ll shut you up, you c
an party with us too,” I say, turning to Zane. He knows Cole. Anything I do that Zane sees will eventually get back to Cole.

  “See what I mean?” Zane says to Hunter. “She doesn’t know what she’s offering up, and I guarantee she’s going to regret it in the morning. Even if she initiates it, she’s drunk. She’s a virgin and sex with her in this condition will be classified as sexual assault.”

  Hunter looks uncomfortable and takes a step back.

  “So I walk away and you hook up with her?”

  “No. I’ll see to it she gets home safe. You could even come with. I don’t want her crazy-ass brother coming after me.”

  “Is he really that bad?”

  “I can handle Tyler,” I plead my case.

  The guys ignore me. It’s like what I have to say doesn’t matter. Like I’m not even fucking there.

  “When it comes to Sam, yeah, he is.”

  Hunter runs his hand through his hair and lets out a long sigh. Fuck! I can’t believe Zane messed this up.

  “I’m sorry, Samantha, maybe this isn’t such a good idea. Maybe we should, you know, get together another night.”

  “What? No!”

  Hunter kisses me on top of my forehead. “I’ll go see if I can find your friend. We’ll meet up in a day or two. I promise.”

  I watch Hunter walk away, and shove Zane’s chest hard.

  “Jackass!”

  “You’ll thank me for this tomorrow.”

  “No, I won’t.” The searing pain starts to sharpen again. “I know what I’m doing! I wanted to fuck him so I could hurt Callie and forget—” I catch myself before I say anything more. No one needs to know what an idiot I am for falling for Cole. For handing him my heart.

  Zane doesn’t push me for details. He hands me my shirt. “Put this on.”

  “I don’t take orders from you,” Shirt in hand, I give him a shove.

  “Okay, have it your way.”

  He picks me up and tosses me over his shoulder. I want to pound on his back and yell at him to put me down, but my stomach roils and the drinks I downed threaten to make their way up and out of my stomach. I’m afraid if I open my mouth I going to blow chunks.