His Secret Baby

by Jamie Knight

  My mother was the first person who I saw, sitting on a bench near the front door. She had been sitting on the edge of her seat, nervously wringing her hands, her neck crooked like a bird, looking in every direction for one glance at me.

  “Izzy!” she called out, her eyes lighting up, her voice strained and high.

  “Hi, mom,” I said, bracing myself for her hug. She pulled me to her, erupting in a fountain of dramatic tears, her shoulders shaking uncontrollably.

  “Oh, Izzy! We are so worried about you! What is going on? Why are they calling this meeting? Is everything okay?”

  She rapid fired her questions at me, shaking my shoulders so hard, I thought that my brain was going to rattle right out of my ears.

  “Stop shaking her, dear,” said my father. “You’re going to hurt her.”

  My mother let go of me and stood back, covering her face and turning away to bawl.

  “Can we just relax?” I said, trying to sound more calm than I felt. “I don’t know why they are calling this meeting. So, before we all get to freaking out, let’s just see what they have to say.”

  My words seemed to strike a chord because my mother calmed down long enough for us to make our way down the long hall of the offices in the administrative building. Unlike the other buildings, it wasn’t swarming with students walking to and fro. In fact, short of the occasional phone ringing and copy machine going off, it was relatively quiet.

  As we passed open doors of some of the offices, I would catch the eyes of its occupants, their quiet day interrupted by my mother’s loud outburst. Some were irritated. Some were curious, peeking their heads out as we passed like they were watching a circus procession. In many ways, they were.

  “Which way do we go now?” asked my mother frantically, since it looked like we had come to a dead end.

  “Who are you looking for?” came a woman’s voice with a country accent from behind us. We all jumped, surprised to see the skinny, pale lady with dirty blonde stringy hair behind us. She was short, wearing a floral dress with a white knit sweater and tennis shoes.

  “We’re looking for the Dean’s office,” I said, trying to calm my heart from the scare we’d just endured.

  “Oh, you must be Izzy,” she said, stepping toward me with her hand extended. “I’m Ana. We’ve been waiting for you. Right this way.”

  She moved in front of us, leading us even further down another hall, turning, before heading toward what looked like a bat cave almost. The door on the read in big, bold block letters read, “Belva Morris, Dean of Students.”

  I stopped breathing. I thought that I was going to faint. I was fainting.

  “Oh my God! Catch her!” cried my mother, her eyes open in horror as she watched me fall toward the ground. My father reached his arms out and caught me just before my head hit the floor. I was sure that I was going to be sick.

  “Call the doctor!” yelled my mother loudly to no one in particular. The thought of the doctor being called and possibly revealing the fact that I was pregnant to my parents was horrifying. It made me come to quickly, bracing myself against my father’s arms.

  “No, I’m okay,” I insisted, weakly. “I just… missed a step.” I stood up, shaking my head in hopes that I would make them believe my lie.

  “Let’s all sit down in the office,” said a voice from inside of the office.

  It was Belva, the woman that I had seen before. Her short, black hair was curled into a bob and she wore a blue skirt suit. She looked very polished and put together. She smiled at me sweetly, her eyes glimmering with a secret as she smiled.

  “Hello, Izzy,” she said, stepping from behind her large oak desk to extend her well-manicured hand toward me. “I’m not sure that we have ever been properly introduced. I’m Belva Morris, Dean of Students. We saw each other in passing the other day when you were with Dr. Rivers. Do you remember that?”

  All eyes were on me. I immediately felt like I had been put on trial.

  “Yes,” I said, my voice hoarse and low.

  Belva nodded slightly and sat back down behind her desk, her eyes down. She looked like she was lost in thought. Glancing up toward the door, she spoke to Ana.

  “Can you give us a little while here?” she said, her eyes fixed on Ana like she was trying to convey a deeper message than her words let on.

  “Okay,” she said, slipping around the corner, closing the door so gently, it didn’t make a sound.

  “Please have a seat,” she said, motioning toward two arm chairs that were across from her desk, angled toward each other.

  I didn’t see another chair, so I stood in the corner on the far side of the arm chair. Belva offered to have another chair brought in, but I declined, saying that I didn’t mind standing. I think part of me hoped that, if I didn’t sit down, this meeting might be over sooner rather than later. I shifted uncomfortably from foot-to-foot, eager to hear what this emergency meeting was about.

  The door creaked open and Jace walked in. He froze, fear plastered on his face as our eyes locked. My breathing grew shallower by the minute. My stomach dropped so fast and hard, I was sure that I was going to blow chunks all over her office.

  I turned to face the wall, willing myself to take long, deep breaths. Tears leaked from the corner of my eyes and I wiped them away, hoping that no one had noticed. I snuck a look over at my parents. My father was looking at Jace, a look of utter confusion on his face.

  My mother’s eyes were fixed squarely on me. She threw me a questioning look and I knew that she wanted to know what was wrong. I shrugged at her, putting a look of confusion on my face, too, turning my attention toward Jace and Belva.

  “Thank you for joining us, Dr. Rivers,” she said, her voice taking on a professional, formal air. “I’m sure you have some idea why you have been called here today…”

  Jace shoved his hand deep into his pocket, rocking on his heels, not leaving his place in front of the door.

  “Actually, I have no idea why I’m here, Belva,” he said cooly, interrupted her. “But I’m sure that you are going to fill me in.”

  Jace turned and nodded at my parents, greeting them politely.

  “These are Ms. Carson’s parents,” said Belva, her voice becoming more icy as she spoke, her hands in a tent in front of her face. “I have invited all of you here to discuss some allegations that have surface from a fellow faculty member. He should be here any moment…”

  No sooner than she had said that, Trent turned the corner, almost running directly into Jace. Trent almost lost his balance, pitching forward into Jace’s quick and steady hands.

  “Whoa,” he said, trying to keep his footing.

  “Trent, I’m glad that you could join us,” said Belva.

  Jace paused, firmly grasping Trent’s elbow, looking in his eyes. I could almost see the lightbulb go off as Jace understood what was going on.

  Trent righted himself, straightening the jacket of blazer.

  “Trent? You…?” said Jace, slowly.

  Trent smirked, confirming my fears: this was going to be bad. Very bad.

  “We just have a few questions and hopefully we can clear some things up and move on,” said Belva, ignoring Jace’s words, turning toward me. “There have been some allegations of Ms. Carson at your home, something that I know that you know is completely unethical and wrong, since we have discussed this topic ad naseum. Is this true?”

  She looked back and forth between Jace and I, waiting to see which one of us was going to answer. Jace didn’t say anything. Trent snickered, crossing his arms while he rested on the crutches.

  I wanted to deny it, tell her that she must have been mistaken. That maybe it was someone else. Or that I had been visiting someone in a different apartment. But then, I knew that they would ask questions that I didn’t have the answers to.

  And the way that Trent stood there, smugly smiling in our direction, I was almost sure that he had some kind of proof of me being there. He hobbled over to stand next to Belva’s desk,
smiling an evil smile.

  “I was there,” I said quickly. Trent almost fell off of his crutches and his mouth fell open.

  “Wha-what do you mean?” he sputtered.

  “Yeah, I thought that I saw you at the back door when I was out front,” I said, turning toward Trent. “I waved, but I thought that you didn’t see me.”

  “I-I…” Trent said, scratching his head and trying to keep his balance.

  “And what were you doing at his apartment, Ms. Carson?” asked Belva, standing up and putting her hands on her hips. She glared at me so hard, I thought that her eyes were going to shoot laser beams in my direction.

  “I’m doing an internship with Dr. Rivers and Mr. Vaanker. We had worked on an experiment and I was dropping of the test results. I know that Mr. Vaanker had been out because of his ankle and I wanted to make sure that I stayed on top of my responsibilities. Did I do something wrong?"

  “Oh, no. Not at all,” said Belva, her hand over her chest. She looked like she was sighing deeply with relief. Trent’s shoulders slump in defeat looking like he had had the wind knocked out of him.

  “But…but…” said Trent, a finger raised toward Belva. Belva put up her hand as if silencing him, staring squarely at Jace. Jace stood quietly watching, his eyes dancing between Belva, Trent, my parents, and me. His shoulders were tense and his eyebrows were furrowed with concern. I knew how he felt. Probably a lot how I did: in the middle of a tornado.

  “Well, is it true?” said Belva, her voice losing its professional tone as she badgered him curiously.

  Jace’s eyes landed on me and stayed there.

  “She was there,” he said, softly.

  He didn’t say anything about the test results. And Belva didn’t press. She seemed satisfied by his answer. She clapped and took a few steps toward the door.

  “Then, it’s settled,” said Belva loudly, visibly happy. “Now we can put all of this business behind us. I’m sorry to have wasted your time Mr. and Mrs. Carson.”

  My parents didn’t look nearly as relieved as Belva did. In fact, they looked like they had just witnessed a horrific car accident. They looked at each other, worriedly, their hands locked together like they were afraid that, if they let go, they might blow away.

  “It’s quite alright,” said my father, the calmer of the two. “I’m just glad that this was all just some misunderstanding.”

  Trent started huffing, his fists clenched by his side as he stared back and forth between Jace, Belva, and me.

  “Well, he… Dr. Rivers reinjured my ankle. Surely there’s got to be some punishment to him for that,” said Trent, the smug look creeping back on his face.

  Belva whirled around, sending a soft breeze through the room.

  “You attacked him?” she screeched. “Explain yourself!”

  “No, calm down, Belva. You have known me for… how many years? From when I got my start teaching at the community college, to when I worked my way up in general science courses, to now that I was sought out specifically to fill the opening for the more advanced Organic Chemistry course teaching position. Even when you might have thought that I have had reason to, I have never lashed out at a student, faculty, or anyone else. Ever. Trent here had come into my apartment and had had some unsavory comment about… someone… and I just told him that I didn’t appreciate that kind of talk about women.”

  “Well, what did he say?” asked Belva, her head cocked toward him.

  Jace surveyed the room, pressed his lips together, and stared at the floor.

  “I’d rather not say that in mixed company,” he said, leaning toward Jace, lowering his voice to a whisper.

  Belva turned and looked at my parents and me, smiling sheepishly and apologetically. I could only imagine what my parents were thinking, looking at the drama that we had been roped into.

  “I had simply suggested that he learn some manners and helped him out the door with a little shove,” said Jace, standing up tall, staring confidently toward Belva. My mother perked up at the display of manliness that he was giving. I had to hide a smile, impressed myself.

  Belva looked at Jace for a few moments, a look on her face like she was trying to decide if she should believe him or not. Her face melted into a smile and she nodded at Jace.

  “Thank you for your honesty, Mr. Rivers,” she said, her voice smooth and even. “I admire your chivalry and ethics. However, I will have to write you up for this. And absolutely no more students at your home again. For any reason. I’ll draft a contract outlining as much and I’ll put it in your mailbox for you to sign.”

  She headed over her desk, picked up a pen, and started scribbling on a yellow notepad that had been sitting on her desk.

  “I’ll look it over and let you know what I decide to do,” said Jace coolly.

  Belva’s head snapped up. She stared at him, seething.

  “What do you mean you’ll have to think about it?” demanded my father, startling everyone in the room. “This is not quite a discussion! What are you really up to?”

  “What I am or am not up to is not the topic of discussion that I wish to have with my employer, especially when it comes to what I do in my personal space,” said Jace, his voice firm and clear, staring straight at Belva. “When I took this job, I was assured that I would be able to live life as I saw fit without a lot of rules and regulations from the university. I signed one contract about my outside of work activity. What’s to stop an endless parade of contracts for me to sign? And I’m not saying that I won’t sign it. I am simply saying that I will look it over and let you know what I decide.”

  I couldn’t help but be turned on by how Jace stood up for himself. For us. It made me proud to know him, despite this uncomfortable situation.

  “Was there anything else that you needed from me?” I asked, my voice almost cracking, I was so quiet. I almost didn’t recognize my own voice. All of the eyes turned toward me again.

  “Oh, right,” said Belva, stepping toward my parents still sitting in front of her desk. “Mr. and Mrs. Carson, I thank you again for your time. You can leave whenever you are ready.”

  My parents stood up slowly, my mothers arm locking into mine. They said goodbye and pulled me down the long hallway, my feet falling over themselves as I tried to keep up pace with my speeding parents. I tried to ground my feet to a halt, but my mother was stronger than I thought.

  After a while, I just stopped fighting and tried to keep my balance as we made our way out the door and to their Volvo. My mother pushed me inside and got in beside me, not giving me a chance to get out. My father jumped into the front seat, started up the car, and pulled away.

  “What in the world are you doing?” I asked, staring at my silent parents as they both tried hard not to look at me. I could see the worry etched on their faces.

  “You’re coming home with us,” said my father.

  “What do you mean?” I said, starting to worry myself. “I have a lot going on and I just can’t leave right now.”

  My mother put a hand up toward me, signaling for me to stop talking.

  “Izzy, we were called down here as a sign,” my mother said, rubbing my cheek with the back of her hand. “There is too much going on here right now and you need to come home and regroup. You look terrible, like you aren’t sleeping or eating. No. No. You’re coming home.”

  My mother turned away from me to face the window, her arms crossed across her chest.

  I knew that was the sign that my mother had made up her mind and there was nothing that I could do to change it. Plus, I was tired and worried myself. Some time at home might give me a chance to clear my head and figure some things out so that I could deal with this whole mess between Jace and I, which seemed to get more and more complicated by the minute.

  “Or maybe we should think about nixing this whole college idea in the first place…” said my father.

  “No!” I yelled, protesting loudly. “I’ll come home now for a little bit. But I’m coming back. And that’
s that.”

  I crossed my arms, signaling that my mind had been made up. My mother turned and looked at me, smiling. She laughed, hugging my head against her chest.

  “Oh, of course you are, honey,” she said. “I want you to be happy.”

  “I do, too,” said my father, gruffly. “But, over my dead body will you be going back to that school! They need to get their affairs in order before they think that they are going to educate the likes of my genius daughter.”

  I laughed easily, watching the university and all its building disappearing quickly behind me. Worry started creeping up again. I wasn’t sure that I should have been leaving. But I also wasn’t sure what I should do. Should I go? Or should I stay?

  But I knew that how my parents were feeling, I would probably have to take a running leap out of a moving car to get out. So, I was going home.

  It might not be so bad to go home and be babied by my parents for a while. That way, I could just relax while I devised a master plan of how I was going to fix the mess that I was leaving behind.

  Chapter 15

  Jace

  Days whirred by as I tried to shake the cringy feeling that I felt from being in Belva’s room with Izzy, her parents, and Trent. It was like my worst nightmare realized.

  I felt like I had walked in on some sort of ambush and, even though things seemed to smooth themselves out right away, it left a bad taste in my mouth. That was certainly not the way that I had intended on meeting Izzy’s parents. And in a way that insinuated that I was anything less than a great teacher with the best of intentions for their daughter.

  And I had Trent to blame for all of it. Somewhere along the way between research and the internship, Trent had changed. Just thinking about his smug face standing there, thinking that he had somehow one upped me, made me want to find him and give him one good hit. It was probably a good thing that I hadn’t run into him since the meeting in Belva’s office.

  Izzy had been wonderful, though. She had handled it with so much maturity and ease. But, of course she did. She is a class act.