Their Family Blessing

by Lorraine Beatty

  “I’ve already been through grief counseling.”

  “This is different. This is for widows who are further along on their journey and struggling with life alone, or coping with children, and sometimes learning to let go and love again. Mainly it’s a place to go where we have others who really understand our situation. Here.” Ashley scribbled on a piece of paper and handed it to her. “I’ll tell Nina about you and if you feel you’d like to come, then give her a call.”

  “I don’t know. I’m not going to be here long enough to get much out of it.”

  “You might be surprised. Just think about it.”

  They talked awhile longer, then Carly finished her shopping and left. However, the conversation kept replaying in her mind. Not only the mention of the widow’s group but the comments about her and Mack. There had never been anything romantic between them. Oh, when she was younger she’d idolized him, the older boy who helped around the lodge. They’d become friends; at times she’d shown him how to do many of the tasks around the campgrounds.

  Later, when she was older, she’d had a crush on him, but she’d gotten over that. Hadn’t she? Carly slid behind the wheel of her car. Truthfully, her feelings for Mack had always been complicated. Her attraction and admiration had warred with her resentment and hurt. Her young heart had found him handsome and exciting, but when she’d realized her father seemed to prefer spending time with Mack rather than with her, her feelings turned sour even though she couldn’t completely evict him from her heart.

  She’d come back that last summer, partly because she had to as a condition of the custody agreement, but she also wanted to see Mack again and sort out her feelings for him. He was the thread tugging her back, and she’d never be free of the lodge unless she could understand her feelings. But her visit had ended in more pain and confusion, and she’d hurried back to her mom and never looked back.

  There was nothing left at Longleaf for her. And the sooner she and Ella returned to Atlanta, the better.

  * * *

  Mack listened to Lucy’s prayers, gave her a kiss on the forehead, then tucked the cover in around her little form. “Sweet dreams, pumpkin.”

  “I love you, Uncle Mack”

  “Love you, too.”

  “Do you think Ella and her mom will stay here a long time? I like having a best friend.”

  “I don’t know, but I hope so, too. Miss Carly was always my best friend.”

  Lucy smiled up at him, sending a warm ring of happiness that encircled his heart.

  Downstairs Mack poured himself a cup of coffee and went outside onto the deck. The weather was staying warmer into the night. May was always the perfect time of year in Mississippi. Not too hot, not too cold.

  His gaze lingered on the lake and the reflection of the full moon on the water. He loved it here. He hadn’t realized how much until he’d heard the terms of the will and the threat of losing the lodge forever had become a real possibility. If only he could find a way to reconnect Carly with this place.

  Out of the corner of his eye, movement drew his attention to the garden swing at the edge of the lake. Something was on the swing? Had an animal curled up on the seat? The shadow moved and he realized the critter was a person. Carly?

  Concern lanced through him, and he set the coffee cup aside and hurried across the lawn. The sounds of sobbing reached him as he drew near. Carly never cried. Ever. He halted, considering his next move. Should he speak to her or quietly back away and leave her alone?

  Before he could move, Carly glanced up and saw him. The look on her face broke his heart. “You okay?”

  She shook her head, then shrugged, then swiped at her eyes.

  He persisted. “Do you want some company?”

  She shrugged again. And sniffed.

  He sat down beside her, waiting for her to speak. He remembered that you couldn’t rush Carly. When she was ready to share, she would.

  “Was he sick for long?” she asked him.

  Mack studied her a moment. Was the lodge starting to penetrate the thick wall of anger? “No. It all happened pretty fast. He got the diagnosis, and two months later he was gone.”

  “Did you see him?”

  “I did. I came up to see him when he was in the hospital. Wade didn’t want anyone to know he was sick. When he went into the hospital, Dwayne thought I should know. He asked to see you.”

  “He did? I didn’t even know he was sick.”

  “Dwayne called your mother, but she refused to give him your number. He tried to track you down, but he didn’t know where to look. The last contact he had was with Troy, but he couldn’t locate you that way, either. There were a dozen Troy Hughes in Atlanta.”

  “Why did he do this?”

  “What’s that?”

  “This crazy will thing. Why not just leave the whole place to you?”

  “Why would he do that? You’re his daughter. He should have left it all to you.”

  She shook her head. “No. He always loved you more.”

  Mack couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “What are you talking about? That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard. I was just an employee. You’re his only child. He loved you more than anything.”

  Carly shook her head, pulling herself into a tighter ball. “No. I realized he didn’t when I was sixteen. That was the year he chose you over me. It was my sixteenth birthday. We were going to go to a movie and then to dinner. It was our yearly ritual. That year he was going to take me to a fancy place in Hastings. But he went somewhere with you instead.”

  Mack struggled to remember a time when he and Wade had ever gone to a movie. “No. We never did that.”

  “I saw you out by the cart shed. You came up to him and said something, and he literally dropped what he was doing and hurried off with you. He patted you on the shoulder and left his arm around you as you walked away. He never came back. I got dressed and waited and waited, but he never came back. My mom was gone—she’d taken a vacation or something—and I really wanted some special time with Dad. But he had chosen you over me. He tried to explain to me later, but I was too upset.” She wiped her eyes again. “Mom came back the next day, and she and Dad fought worse than ever. Then we left.”

  Mack’s heart had twisted as he listened. He remembered that day well. “Carly, you’re wrong. That wasn’t what happened.”

  Carly looked away.

  He wanted to pull her close to comfort her but didn’t dare. “I remember that day clearly. I came to your dad for help. I’d gotten a call from my mom’s neighbor. She’d found my mom unconscious on the floor. I was terrified. Your dad took me home and stayed with me when the ambulance took Mom to the hospital and stayed there until we knew she was going to be all right. He was helping me, Carly, not choosing me over you.”

  Mack studied her a moment. She didn’t react or speak, so he had no idea what she was thinking. Maybe she didn’t believe him. “Your father loved you more than anything. No one could ever take your place. Yes, we were close. He was my mentor and I loved him, but I could never be more important to him than you. Maybe if you’d let him explain what had happened, you would have understood.”

  “No. It wouldn’t have changed anything. Mom came back the next day and told me the truth. Then we left.”

  “What truth?” There was something more. Something she wasn’t telling him, and his instincts told him it had more to with Carly’s deep-seated anger than her believing Wade cared more for him than her. Carly remained silent. There was nothing to be gained by hanging around. He stood, resisting the urge to touch her. “I’m sorry you felt that way, but there was no reason to. You were Wade’s precious child, and nothing or no one could change that.” She didn’t respond. “Are you coming inside?”

  “Not yet.”

  “Okay. If you want to talk, you know where to find me.”

  His hea
rt was heavy as he started back to the lodge. Her confession shone a light on many things that had puzzled him over the years. If he looked at things objectively, he could see where Carly might have misinterpreted his and Wade’s relationship. Mack ached for her, all these years believing that her father didn’t care.

  He glanced back over his shoulder at Carly. She was still huddled in the swing. She looked so sad and alone. He wished she would let him comfort her, be a friend again. He knew one thing for certain. Before she left here, he would make sure she understood how much her father had loved her.

  Chapter Four

  Carly stopped outside the door of the psychologist’s office and inhaled a deep breath. Ashley smiled over at her.

  “You’re not going to an execution, sweetie. It’s only a therapy group.”

  She grinned and nodded. “I know I’m acting ridiculous, but I’m just not sure how this will help me with the will situation.”

  “It probably won’t. But it might help you in other ways, some you may not even know you need help with.”

  Carly shook her head. “Now you’re just talking nonsense.”

  Ashley opened the door. “We’ll see.”

  The inner office was a soothing space of muted colors and comfy furniture. Several ladies were already there, helping themselves to soft drinks at a small table near the window. Carly’s anxiety downshifted. Maybe Ash was right. Maybe it would be good to talk to other women who had been through the experience of widowhood.

  “Good evening, ladies.”

  An attractive woman in her thirties entered, a warm smile lighting up her face. Carly had expected a more matronly type, not someone near her age. She made a beeline toward her.

  “Carly, right? I’m so glad to meet you and that you decided to come. After our brief phone call the other day, I was afraid I might have scared you off.”

  “No, not at all. Besides, Ashley has sung your praises and that of the group.” She had questioned why she should attend the sessions. Other than the situation with the will, she was doing all right. Ella was completely healed from her heart surgery, she loved her job, she had a nice apartment, and somehow she’d find a way to deal with all the debt hanging over her head. Then Mack had found her on the swing, crying like a two-year-old, and he’d explained about the day her dad had stood her up.

  That revelation had turned her world upside down. All her assumptions about her father and his relationship with Mack were suddenly in question. Her dad had tried to tell her why he’d missed her birthday outing, but she’d been so angry and hurt she’d refused to let him explain and hidden in her room to nurse her disappointment.

  Nina called the group to order and they settled in. Carly was surprised to find how comfortable the group was. She listened as they each commented on their week. Paula, Charlotte, Jen and Trudy had been with the group a long time. Ashley and a woman named Donna were relatively new. All the women had challenges that they were struggling with in their lives, and each comment touched something deep inside Carly.

  When it was her turn to speak, Nina told her she could wait until she felt more comfortable, but something about the women here gave her courage and the security to open up.

  “I wasn’t sure I wanted to come here. I didn’t think I really had anything to work out. My issues are all current and have nothing to do with being a widow. But now I’m wondering if there might be something I’m missing.”

  Paula chuckled. “She’s a quick learner, this one.”

  The others joined in the teasing.

  Charlotte leaned forward. “So what’s going on that you wanted to join our group? I think I can speak for all of us when I say we came here for one reason and found out there was something totally different at work.”

  Carly took a moment to consider her words before offering a quick explanation about her father’s quirky will and the resulting complications. “I just want to sell the place and get on with my life.”

  Trudy pushed her glasses up on her nose. “Are you sure that’s what you want?”

  “Yes. Of course. I have no good memories of the lodge.”

  Jen raised her eyebrows. “Really? Whenever I hear a declarative statement like that it sends up red flags, which usually mean the person is in serious denial.”

  Nina nodded. “Not always, but many times it’s a clue as to what’s really going on.”

  Carly shook her heard. “I’m not. I want to sell the lodge and go home. Nothing complicated about that.”

  “I know I’m new here.” Donna scooted forward on the chair. “But I think they may have a point. You say you grew up at this lodge and you have no good memories, not even one. I find that hard to believe. Sounds to me like you’re avoiding something.”

  Caught like a fish on a hook, she stared at her hands a long moment. If she were perfectly honest with herself, she was full of good memories. It was just the few bad ones that had blacked them out. “I suppose there are good memories. The truth is, I need the money from the sale to pay off my daughter’s medical bills. She had a serious heart surgery, and the expense was more than my insurance would cover. Way more.”

  The sympathetic response from the women brought tears to her eyes.

  Jen spoke up. “I’m a nurse and I know of some organizations that can help with those kinds of expenses. If you’d like, I can put you touch with them.”

  “That would be wonderful, thank you.”

  Paula chuckled. “One problem solved. So what’s the next bugaboo you’re trying to avoid.”

  Carly cringed. There was no way she was going to bring up all the issues with Mack. “Not a thing. Thanks to this group I won’t even have to come back next week.”

  Charlotte laughed. “Right. Trust me, you’ll find a whole boatload of reasons to come back. I’ve been coming for years. Paula is one of the original members.”

  Carly studied the older woman.

  Paula grimaced. “Don’t look at me that way. This isn’t a one-size-fits-all kind of group. I have a lot of issues to work through. Being a widow isn’t like having the flu, you know. It’s a chronic condition. You never completely recover.”

  When the meeting ended and Carly was on her way home, she replayed all the comments the women had made. Each had a different story, a different journey, but she’d identified with each of them. The thread of widowhood connected them all.

  Pulling up to the lodge, the glow from inside gave the old home a welcoming feeling. She remembered coming home at night and seeing the lights and the sense of being home that had warmed her.

  Sometimes she’d enter the living quarters from their side of the porch, other times she’d enter through the main room so she could see all the guests. They always looked so happy and friendly. It made her proud to be the owner, knowing she was partly responsible for their visit to Longleaf.

  So how did she allow all the good things to resurface when the last ones marred everything that had come before?

  Perhaps the ladies were right. She might have many more reasons to attend the meetings.

  * * *

  Mack watched Carly’s car pull up the long lane to the lodge and park at the side where the living quarters were located. Thelma had told him she had a meeting of some sort with a widow’s group, but he suspected her motivation was something else entirely. The four of them were supposed to sit down tonight and finalize the priority list of the necessary repairs. It didn’t take a psychologist to realize Carly was avoiding making those decisions.

  From where he sat on the corner of the wide wraparound porch, he could see Carly as she walked toward the main door. Her gait was slow and labored, as if she was deep in thought. He wished he could ease her sadness somehow. She stopped and stiffened. Mack froze. Had she sensed his presence?

  “Mack?”

  He inhaled a slow breath. He really didn’t want to confront her tonight. “Yea
h.”

  She walked across the porch and stopped a few feet away. “Are you keeping tabs on me?”

  He smiled. “No, Carly. I was merely enjoying the warm evening. How was your meeting?”

  “Fine. Sorry I wasn’t here to talk about the lodge plans. Maybe we can go over everything in the morning.”

  “No need.” He stood. “We went ahead without you. We can’t afford to waste any time.”

  “Why would you do that? I have a say in this, too.”

  “You do. But you weren’t here. Besides, I can fill you in right now. Bottom line is we can’t open in a week. There are too many repairs to make and not enough employees available. We’ve pushed the opening back another week, but even that’s doubtful.”

  Carly rubbed her temple. “But Thelma and Dwayne were so sure we could open quickly.”

  “That was before we knew the extent of the repairs, and they were working on the assumption that many of the former employees would return to work. I know this has put a crimp in your plans, but it’s only a small setback.”

  Carly shook her head. “No. It’s not small at all. At this rate I’ll never get back home.”

  “This is your home, Carly. It always was and always will be. You can deny it, you can lie to yourself from now till the end of time, but you can’t run from it.”

  “You don’t know me anymore, Mack.” She squared her shoulders and met his gaze. “Whatever was here for me was destroyed long ago, and nothing can repair it. If you’ll excuse me, I have to check on my daughter.”

  “Lucy and Ella are curled up with my tablet watching Annie.”

  Carly grinned. “Which means they’ll be singing ‘Tomorrow’ all day.”

  “Or ‘Hard-Knock Life.’” Mack slipped his hands into his pockets. “Thelma is waiting to talk to you. She wants to do a walk-through of the lodge rooms and take inventory on what needs to be done before we open.”

  Carly crossed her arms over her chest and set her jaw. “It’s late, maybe we can do that in the morning.”