Mere Phantasy

by Ashley Lauren

  Zane tiptoed over the creaking wood floor of the Jolly Roger and sat next to my barred doors. His legs folded Indian-style as he watched me pretend to sleep. But with my eyes closed, I was wide awake, listening to his shallow breathing and trying to block out any feelings of pity or regret or whatever else would benefit him. I hated him, hated him.

  But I didn’t hate him, despite the mantra in my head.

  I just didn’t particularly like him either.

  He knew I wouldn’t talk if I actually was awake, so he started a conversation with himself, even after I decided to open my eyes and sit up slowly, grimacing in pain.

  “Are you hungry? Man, I’m starved. Hook won’t feed me. Says I need to ‘fulfill my punishment.’ Do you want me to find some water? It can get pretty dry down here.” He watched my face hopefully.

  I tried hard not to show emotion, hugging my legs to my chest and staring right at him.

  “Lace, c’mon,” he urged, scooting as close to the bars as his long, bony legs would let him. “Don’t be this way. I already told you so many times he tricked me. He told me you’d be safe, that you just needed to tell him a few things and you could come right back to me and Lox. I—” He let out a defeated breath and ran his hands over his face. “What do you want from me?” His eyes searched mine. “I can’t say sorry anymore without it losing its meaning, love.”

  “Don’t call me that,” I said abruptly, surprising us both.

  Instead of seeming happy about me speaking up, Zane frowned sadly and pulled at his hair in frustration. “Please, Lacey. Just say what I need to do to fix this.”

  “There’s no fixing what’s already done,” I croaked, my throat and lungs still horribly sore after almost drowning a second time.

  Zane looked pained by that comment, trying to reach through the bars to grab my hand. Jerkily, I pulled away so he couldn’t touch me.

  After a few minutes of silence, he offered, “Well, at least let me get you something. Is there anything I-I can get you? I just want to help.”

  My mind actually thought this over for a second despite the anger I was enveloped in. What did I want? Water, yeah. Food? Yes. But neither thing was available at the moment.

  Then, glancing into the corner of the brig, a littering of supplies and shining metals caught my eye, and memories came flooding in from the last predicament we shared here in this dark, desolate place.

  “The picture,” I murmured, but he didn’t hear me fully, tilting his head to the side like a curious puppy.

  “What?”

  “Go get that picture, Zane,” I ordered more sternly this time.

  The look on his face told me he knew exactly what I was talking about and also showed his surprise that I was concerned about it. As far as I knew, Zane’s things were still here on the ship. That picture was still here. And I wanted answers, all of them, if I was stuck with him down here.

  Zane stayed for a few more moments and then bowed his head in defeat. He walked to the other corner of the ship’s lower deck and picked up a sack. I was surprised he’d been able to hide his belongings here without Hook finding them. Unless Hook already knew and just didn’t care.

  “I forgot they were even here.”

  As Zane pushed the bag through the bars, I leaned over and quickly snatched it from him. He started to say something but stopped and frowned, watching me.

  I pulled out the picture frame and held it up for Zane to see. After a few moments of silence, I spoke solemnly. “Who is that?” I pointed to the baby in the arms of the pretty lady in the picture. Zane pursed his lips and didn’t answer. “Tell me, Zane.”

  “It’s me.”

  I raised an eyebrow and studied the baby. I could have sworn it looked a lot like me and nothing like Zane. He had brown eyes, not light ones.

  “No, it’s not. That baby has light eyes, not brown.”

  “It’s just the picture that makes it look like that. It’s me. I swear.” He sighed and looked me straight in the eyes. Frustratingly, I believed him.

  But if Zane was the little baby, then who was the other boy in the photo?

  “And this is…?”

  A long breath escaped Zane’s lungs. “It’s Peter.”

  The answer hit me like a ton of bricks. If I didn’t have my back against the wall for support, I might have fallen over. Zane moved forward, wanting to help me, but he was on the other side of the bars and too far to catch me anyway. Luckily, I put my arm out to steady myself.

  “That is not Peter Pan.” I pointed to the stone-faced boy in the photo.

  “It is.”

  How was that even possible? Peter Pan never had a sibling. At least, not in any story I’d known about him. Lox had never mentioned it. Not even Peter himself. Zane had kept me in the dark the whole time.

  I felt my cheeks get warm as I watched him steadily.

  His jaw clenched. “I’m the youngest, Lacey, and Peter has no idea I’m that baby. I was born after he left for Neverland.”

  “But how are you older now? How was this picture even taken?”

  “Because…” Zane began. “I grew up in the Mainland while Peter stayed the same age in Neverland, but I was born here. My parents had wanted to be close to Peter after they lost him as a child, so they bartered their way here from London, and back, all before I was old enough to remember any of it. I was fifteen before I found out Peter was my brother. But by then, I’d already found my way to Neverland, after our parents died…” He cleared his throat, watching the ground. “This was taken the day they moved back to the Mainland, with me in my mother’s arms and Peter about seven. The next night, he just… left again, claiming he’d been forgotten long ago. They never saw him again.”

  I didn’t say anything. That was a lot of information. And was it true? This guy had blatantly lied straight to my face multiple times. What if he was making this all up as he went to get me to trust him again?

  Zane continued. “When you first came to Neverland and before we escaped together, H-Hook had found me in an old bar in Neverland. I got a ride over here from a dingy merchant who bartered his way to the second star before its portal was closed. I was out of my mind, yapping about… about who I’d met when I got here and what I’d experienced. Hook offered me a job, to get back at Peter for all he’d done to me and my parents.

  “Once I was here, he told me if I didn’t work with him and help him on this plan that he would kill me, and it was too late by then to go back. So I did it, saved my own skin over yours… because I thought it would get back at Peter. I thought, for once, I would have the power and luck he had.” His eyes glistened; he clutched the bars of my cell so hard his knuckles were white. “Hurting you was like stabbing myself in the gut multiple times without ever dying. It was agonizing, Lacey.”

  “You lied to me. What makes you think I’d ever want anything to do with you ever again?” I didn’t sound angry, just sad.

  “I-I know I ended up putting you in danger, Lacey.” He grabbed my hands through the bars, holding on to them tightly, looking into my eyes. “But you were just a stupid random girl when I made the deal. I hadn’t gotten to know you then. Hook was going to leave me for dead, but you took me in just because that’s who you are. You aren’t like everyone else here, including me. You’re kind, only trying to do what’s best for everyone and yourself. Not one single part of you is dark.” Shuffling closer to me, his breath fanned over my bruised knuckles, sparking goose bumps down my freezing arms. The softness of his eyes was almost inviting as he whispered, “You came in and lit up this place, princess. And that means me, too.”

  I thought his words over, staring right back at him. No one had ever said something like that to me before; no one had ever bothered enough to care. I was just the girl who vandalized and hadn’t grieved over her murdered mother correctly, not all these things Zane claimed.

  He breathed raggedly. “Forget the stupid treasure; I don’t want it anymore.” He shook my hands for emphasis. “I just need you to for
give me so I can make things better again. Please.”

  Zane didn’t blink, staring at me with those stupid, deep-brown eyes. I wrapped my fingers around his palm and squeezed.

  I didn’t trust him.

  But I didn’t hate him either.

  I was the dumb girl who thought, Well, he didn’t actually get me killed, so that still counts as something good, right? And one who foolishly believed in second chances.

  That was just who I was, I guess. Giving another chance despite everything that happened. And maybe it was idiotic to trust him again, but something in the back of my mind reminded me not only did everyone make mistakes, but I’d made one, too. I’d let Peter prick his finger on that merciless spindle, yet he’d already given me a second chance I didn’t deserve.

  So I thought it was only fair I give the same to Zane.

  He seemed surprised.

  But as he clutched my hand right back, I knew it was exactly who I needed to be.

  Just like my mother.

  Twenty-Seven

  “Boy, I can promise you power.” the captain sneered through the night. Distantly, a seabird cried and the breeze could be heard rustling the sail above their heads. The young person Hook was speaking to was cast upon by a shadow, the moon silhouetting him from behind. He wanted no one to know he was siding with the captain after all that’d happened. And he had to hurry, or else he wouldn’t be back before the crew awoke to begin their day.

  “And you swear I’ll get what I’ve wanted?” the boy asked, shoving his hands in his pockets and glancing over his shoulders out into the sea.

  Hook observed the traitor with an amused smirk. “I swear on my life. If you do as I say, you will get what you so desire.”

  The boy hesitated, thinking of all the things he would be giving up if he continued with this. He’d already screwed up once before, and that hadn’t mended itself as he’d hoped it would. Yet the feeling of wishing, wanting power was enough to make him reach out and take the grimy pirate’s hand.

  “Then we have a deal,” he grunted, and the pact was sealed.

  And even though the boy was terrified of what was to come, he couldn’t help but feel his fingertips itch with the reminder that he was going to benefit from this in the long run. Power. He’d have it all. And he’d also find exactly what he’d been waiting for.

  The locket and the ability to unlock it.

  Zane’s smile faded just as soon as it appeared when a thunderous sound came from the deck above. I flinched, still grasping his hand through the bars as the door leading to the top deck flew open and a pirate appeared, our moment of reconciliation coming to an abrupt end. At that moment, Zane shot up to his side of the room, while I pushed on the bars holding me in and watched the pirate descend the stairs. Pushing his glasses onto the end of his nose, he wobbled over to my cell.

  The man was stubby with curly white hair and a goatee to match. He had on knee-high boots that I could see barely fit his chubby legs and an old, wrinkled brown hat atop his head. It was easy to recognize him as Smee.

  When he reached into his trouser pocket and pulled out some keys, he fumbled with them briefly before he unlocked my door and raised a shaky arm toward the stairs leading up to the deck.

  “This’a way, kiddos.” He burped near my face.

  Hurrying in disgust, I started to climb the steps with the pirate and Zane behind me, limping from the injury on my calf. When I looked back into the brig, I hoped Zane stayed close to us. Just in case this didn’t go the way we hoped. Just in case I needed saving again.

  Because let’s face it. I was no hero.

  And everyone else knew it, too.

  The plan Hook had now was to force Zane and me by gunpoint to lead at least ten of his crew, plus himself and Mr. Smee, to the Nevertree. Why he hadn’t been able to find it before was beyond me. I mean, if I could find the place after my first three trips, then he definitely should have after years of searching. We had a little bit of a hiccup to get over.

  “If I’d found his hideaway years ago…” Hook spoke between gritted teeth as we trudged through the forest before him. “I would’ve obviously disposed of him. But I’ve found—” He stumbled a little, causing me to laugh. In response, he pushed the gun into my back harder with a growl. “That for some bloody reason, only children can find this place.”

  I wanted to keep talking to him, get out as much information as I could. So I asked over my shoulder as he pushed me forward, “Why not kidnap a Lost Boy and get them to take you there?” I prayed Zane figured out a plan to distract them from the Nevertree where the Lost Boys were watching over Peter.

  Hook flipped his greasy locks from his face in annoyance. “You have no idea how diabolical those little demons can be.”

  “And fast,” a pirate accompanying us added.

  The captain sent a glare his way before the barrel of the gun pressed even farther into my lower spine, making me wince. “Keep moving, Miss Rose,” he whispered, prickling scruff along his dirty cheek rubbing against my own, making me wrench away. When I did this, he threw his hook around my neck and pointed it into my clavicle in a threatening way. “Don’t struggle, my dear. It will only get you in trouble,” he purred under my ear, and I fought the urge to let the frightened tears escape. The stench of him was enough to make me want to gag, like putrid rotten fish. And blood.

  “Now, tell me where the hideout is.” Hook breathed against my face. “Tell me.”

  The Nevertree was before us now, and I was finding it hard to breathe with the way the captain was holding me, panic overtaking every logical sense I had. My chest panted for fresh air, my muscles were clenched, stopping me from stepping into his sharp replacement for a hand. I was scared of what he would he would let his men do to me if I didn’t comply—or worse—what he would do to me. He was dangerously close to my body, a devilish look in his eyes. Panic spread throughout my body as I realized just how serious his threats were now. He was in complete control, and he would do whatever means necessary to prove it. And that thought alone was enough to push me past the breaking point.

  Defeatedly, I pointed up at the tree. In that moment of hysteria, where the vile man had all the power over me, I gave up the only thing I’d been trying to protect almost the entire time I’d been here.

  The look on Zane’s face told me he was disappointed, but all I could do once Hook let me go was fall to my knees and crawl away from him, wiping under my eyes at the frightened tears he’d forced to the surface.

  “Where are you pointing, girl?” the captain hissed, and I blinked up at him.

  “The tree, it’s in the tree.” I gasped, running my fingers over where the sharp edge of Hook’s weapon had been placed.

  The captain growled in annoyance, reeling around to look at me. “There’re hundreds of trees in this forest!” he shouted, whisking around. I was confused; the tree was right before us, the tallest around. “What tree is it?” He bent down to grab at me, lifting me by my vest roughly so I was face to face with him. A shiver ran up my spine as I tried to get away, pushing into his chest and using all my strength to peel from his grip despite my throbbing calf wound.

  “It’s right there, the b-big one! Now, please let me go.” I writhed again, but the captain brought me closer, spitting furiously in my face. His eyes flashed dangerously.

  “You tell me where the damned tree is or you’ll regret ever tricking me into this journey!”

  “Y-you can’t kill her. She’s the only one able to control the locket!” Zane desperately tried to deter the captain.

  But Hook, eyes bloody red, raised his gun into the air with a maddened expression, aiming right for my nose. “Watch me.”

  In that moment, something inside my mind told me to twist back to see the Nevertree. When I looked to the captain after that, his eyes flickered to every area but the tree itself.

  And I realized it almost like a slap to the face.

  Hook couldn’t see the tree.

  Just like I hadn�
�t been able to see the forest nymphs.

  He didn’t believe, which was why he’d never found Peter’s hideout before.

  Maybe laughing wasn’t the best idea, but I couldn’t help it. Joy filled all the gaps where Hook had inflicted fear in me, and it just wouldn’t stop. I threw back my head and began to chuckle, so much it hurt.

  “What the bloody hell are you laughing about?” the captain snarled, shaking my head to lurch up and look him in the eye. “Stop this instant!”

  But I wasn’t scared anymore. Because I’d realized, like a savior in the dark, that if I’d seen the Nevertree the entire time I’d been here, it meant I’d believed even before Peter ignited the locket’s powers in me and Zane showed me the tree nymphs. I’d already believed, and that’s why I could see the unseen. I could sense it, even when I didn’t realize it. I was a dream catcher who had been so consumed with a fiction world her entire life she had no choice but to accept it at some point. I’d already accepted Neverland way before Peter brought me here in my dreams.

  Since I believed, I was more powerful than the captain would ever be. Because I had hope.

  And hope was dangerous, but also a very, very beautiful thing.

  I peered straight up at Hook, a grin plastered on my face. “You won’t win this. You’re the villain, and villains never get a happy ending.”

  I’d never expected it, but it came anyway. A brisk backhand sent me backwards into the dirt. It blurred my vision with tears and distorted my hearing, but not enough to miss the cry of rage that came from Zane.

  And the chorus of many, many others.

  When I blinked up, clutching my cheek, the scene before me had already changed drastically. Men armed with artillery and clothed in greens to match the forest around them were slashing their way to the crew of pirates and to intercept the captain. But Hook was already being wrestled to the ground by Zane, who had apparently pounced on him, his hands still tied in front of him.