A Perfect Cornish Christmas

by Phillipa Ashley

  Scarlett stifled a gasp with her hand.

  Ellie bit her lip, desperately trying to suppress any sign of shock or negativity. Admitting the test was correct must have been a huge hurdle for their mum to get over. She and Scarlett had always accepted that the test was accurate, but hearing their mother finally admit it … well, it was like the first moment they’d seen the results all over again.

  ‘Mum? Are you OK?’ she said carefully. ‘Do you want to sit down?’

  ‘I’m fine. I’ve rehearsed the words a hundred times but now I’m here, I find that none of them seem right. That test, it must be correct. I was in shock at first, then denial, but there is a chance that your father, well, he might not be your actual dad …’ She looked at Scarlett. ‘I’m so sorry, darling. I’ve let you down and I’ve allowed you to suffer. I’m sorry.’

  Their mother burst into tears.

  Scarlett choked back a sob.

  Ellie didn’t know who to go to first. ‘Come on, sit down, Mum.’ She ushered her mum to the sofa and sat her down. She passed her a box of tissues.

  Scarlett finally looked up, her face white. ‘Who is he?’

  ‘I don’t know,’ her mum replied.

  ‘You must do!’

  ‘I don’t.’

  ‘How? How can you not know? I don’t believe it!’

  ‘Scarlett. Stop it!’ Ellie was sharp, but she had to be. ‘This is hard for you, but it must be almost impossible for Mum. Give her some time.’

  ‘She’s already had time …’

  Anna wiped her eyes. ‘Scarlett, love, I don’t blame you for being angry and confused but I can’t tell you who he was – is. I genuinely thought it was impossible that you were anyone else’s daughter but your father’s. I’d almost made myself believe that it – the mistake – never happened. It was only once; a moment of madness, and I’d had a lot to drink. And it couldn’t have been him … it just couldn’t.’

  ‘Why did you think it was impossible? Who was he?’

  ‘It was at a party …’ Her voice hardened. ‘Look. I don’t want to talk about it and it won’t do any good to rake over the details. I can’t even remember the exact date now, but I’ve regretted it every day since. There was no need for anyone to know what had happened, and I was never going to tell any of you because that would only have blown the family apart.’

  ‘It has blown the family apart,’ Scarlett burst out. ‘Don’t you think I regret ordering that test every day, too? But you owe it to me to tell me who he was. I know pretty much exactly when it happened, that’s obvious to anyone. I think I’d remember if I’d had an affair with another man and got pregnant!’

  Horrified at the shouting match, Ellie leapt in. ‘Scarlett! That’s enough. This isn’t helping anyone.’

  ‘It’s OK, Ellie. You can hardly blame her for being upset,’ her mother said.

  Scarlett ignored Ellie. ‘Why didn’t you admit the test was right at Christmas? Save us all a lot of misery. And what about Dad? What does he have to say about it?’

  ‘He doesn’t know yet. I thought I owed it to you to tell you first, especially you, my love.’ Her eyes threw a plea to Scarlett.

  Ellie was shaking with shock herself, but had to take charge or this situation would get even worse, and words would be flung that could never be taken back.

  She reached out to touch Scarlett’s hand, but Scarlett snatched it away. Ellie felt sick. This was even worse than she’d imagined. They finally had an answer from their mother but it had only opened up even more questions.

  ‘Darling. I came here to tell you something I’m not proud of, that I have wanted to forget – deny – for over thirty years. I haven’t even admitted it to your father. Though I ought to and I will when I go home, no matter the consequences. What I wish you’d understand is that there are two sides – many sides – to every story. I’m not seeking to excuse what I did, but your father …’ She clammed up.

  ‘What did Dad do?’ Ellie jumped in.

  Scarlett let out a snort. ‘Yeah, blame Dad.’

  Ellie flashed her a warning look. ‘Go on, Mum,’ she encouraged.

  ‘It’s more what he didn’t do, but this is no time to lay blame. It’s between me and him. I’ve told you all I can and I’m sorry that I can’t give you any more answers. All you need to know is that your dad – Roger – has loved and cared for you all his life. He’s told you that you are his daughter as far as he’s concerned, and that’s all that matters. You both need to try and come to terms with that.’

  ‘I have been trying,’ Scarlett muttered. ‘I love Dad and I still love you …’ The catch in her voice showed that she was on the verge of tears and desperately trying to hold it together. ‘But I can’t help wanting to know more.’

  ‘There’s no point, my love,’ Anna murmured. ‘There’s nothing to tell, nothing worth knowing. I was drunk, I did something I regret that I can barely remember. I never thought it would have any consequences, but I was wrong.’ She got up. ‘I’d like to go up to my room now. I need some time to myself.’

  Their mother brushed her hand over Ellie’s. Scarlett sat with her arms folded, obviously too upset to say any more.

  Ellie wished she could split herself in two and comfort them both. ‘I’ll come up with you, Mum.’

  Anna patted Ellie’s hand. ‘I think Scarlett needs you more.’

  Chapter Eleven

  The atmosphere had been taut as a wire since breakfast, with Scarlett fleeing to the study with a sudden enthusiasm for her screw article. Their mother had gone for a walk for much of the morning, giving Scarlett and Ellie the chance to talk alone.

  Ellie had brought a mug of hot chocolate into the study for her. ‘I’m glad Mum’s finally admitted something happened, but why won’t she say who he was?’ Scarlett said, accepting the mug and thinking again how lucky she was to have Ellie back in her life. She didn’t know how she’d have coped with recent events if her sister had still lived on the other side of the world. ‘Thanks for the chocolate.’

  ‘You’re welcome, hun. It must have been a huge step for her to even admit she’d had an affair – or had sex, or whatever happened – and I think it’s too much for her to talk about the details. She might actually have blanked them out and can’t remember him.’

  ‘I don’t believe that. I’ve had the odd occasion when I had the wine goggles on but I’ve never been too pissed to remember who I slept with.’

  ‘What if she remembers doing it, but doesn’t know his name? She mentioned a party … they might have been smoking stuff,’ Ellie said reasonably.

  ‘Maybe.’ Scarlett shuddered. ‘It’s not the best, is it? Imagining your own mother high and having sex with a random stranger.’

  ‘No, but if we judge her and push her, we’re only going to make things harder for her and we might never find out the full story, if she actually has a story to tell. Look, I don’t have to work this afternoon, so why don’t we all make the Christmas cake together, like we used to? It will give us some time with Mum, without all the questions and recriminations. You never know, she might open up if we back off?’

  They’d always tried to wait until Ellie was on a visit home to make the Christmas cake. Everything she was saying made perfect sense, but it was hard for Scarlett to be rational and reasonable in her current state of mind.

  She nodded. ‘OK, and thanks for trying to keep the peace.’

  She and Ellie popped into Porthmellow for more ingredients. The Christmas lights were being put up in the streets and across the harbour ready for the switch-on later in the month. Scarlett felt a frisson of excitement that the festive season was on its way, but it was tinged as always by the knowledge that this year would be very different. However, hunting down dried fruit, mincemeat and a bottle of brandy in Porthmellow’s only supermarket cheered her up. This afternoon would be an opportunity to soothe troubled waters, for a little while at least.

  When Anna returned from her walk, she seemed to brighten up when Scarle
tt mentioned the baking session. They all set to in the kitchen, taking it in turns to weigh, whisk and stir the cake mixture. Ellie also rustled up some pastry for mince pies, which Scarlett filled with mincemeat. Flour flew and there was even laughter. Scarlett felt the much-loved family ritual added a tiny bit more glue to the bonds that had weakened between them.

  ‘We always loved doing this,’ Scarlett said.

  ‘Well, it should be the first Sunday before Advent, but none of us has ever cared about that. We had to fit it in when Ellie was home for a visit.’ Anna was cutting up greaseproof paper to line the cake tin. It was an old one that had belonged to Auntie Joan and was indestructible. Joan had once said her own mother had handed it down to her, so goodness knows how many cakes it had seen over the years. The mince pie tins were equally ancient, rigid, with scallop shapes in the bottom.

  They’d kept the vast majority of their aunt’s kitchen equipment, and the pretty copper jelly moulds and stoneware jars still decorated the dresser. They’d tried to leave as many of her things as they could, apart from her clothes and some of the books, which had gone to the charity shop. Even as she weighed and sifted, Scarlett couldn’t help thinking of the memories this house held – and of Treasures of the Cornish Seashore, with its mysterious and troubling message inside.

  When they were almost ready to tip the mixture into the tin, the landline rang out.

  ‘I’ll answer it.’ Ellie wiped her hands on a tea towel and almost galloped into the hall.

  When she walked back into the kitchen a few minutes later, Scarlett noticed that her eyes shone with happiness.

  ‘Let me guess who that was—’

  ‘Actually, it was Drew. He wants to offer me a new contract as ship’s cook next spring,’ Ellie said. ‘So you were wrong, Scarlett.’

  Anna gave them both a sharp look. ‘Wrong about what? What am I missing here?’

  ‘Ellie’s new man.’ Scarlett winked theatrically.

  Ellie squealed in protest. ‘He’s not my “new man”! We’ve only known each other a few weeks. He – Aaron Carman – is a friend,’ she explained to her mother. ‘He’s the son of Troy and Evie; you know them.’

  ‘I do, but I thought their son was in the army.’

  ‘He was until very recently. He’s left now and is hoping to start up a security business in the area. Actually, he’s renting Cove Cottage.’

  ‘Ellie ran into him on the lane. Literally.’ Scarlett tittered.

  ‘Actually, I ran into the wall. Aaron and I didn’t make contact.’

  ‘Not yet.’ Scarlett dipped a teaspoon in the cake mix.

  Ellie ignored her. ‘He towed my car to the manor and got it fixed. He, um, used to look after tanks in the army.’

  Her mother smiled broadly. ‘He sounds like a useful bloke to have around. I vaguely remember him as a teenager. Seemed a nice lad, and the Carmans are salt of the earth. Is he really only a friend?’

  ‘For now. Like I say, he’s only been here a few weeks. I don’t even know what his longer-term plans are.’

  ‘None of us do.’ Scarlett licked the teaspoon and sighed.

  ‘Scarlett, will there be any of that cake mix left by the time you’ve finished with it?’

  ‘And you’d better not even think of double-dipping,’ warned Ellie.

  Scarlett pouted. Suddenly, they were all back to their teenage years, teasing each other, Scarlett impulsive, Ellie trying to be the ‘grown-up’ sister, their mother trying to keep them in line with good-natured exasperation – and trying to delve into the details of Ellie’s love life. At least Jude hadn’t come onto Anna’s radar, not that he was a love interest yet, although, if Scarlett was reading the signals properly, the wild swimming trip might change that very soon.

  Chapter Twelve

  Scarlett was right, Ellie had thought it might be Aaron on the phone. While she wasn’t thrilled with all the talk about him, at least while she was the focus of attention, other subjects were off the menu. She’d enjoyed the temporary return to normality while they’d been making the cake.

  It seemed as if their lives had become even more tangled within the space of a few short weeks, with Aaron’s arrival and their mother’s revelation.

  Then there was Scarlett, who seemed to be getting very cosy with Jude Penberth, not that that was a bad thing. It was probably a good thing for her sister to have another focus. Just as long as that relationship didn’t go belly up. The last thing Scarlett needed right now was to have her heart broken all over again.

  She loaded the dishwasher while Scarlett and her mum transferred the cake mixture to the tin and dotted it with cherries and almonds. The pies were already baking and wafting comforting aromas through the house. She was thinking about washing up the items that couldn’t or wouldn’t fit in the machine when her mobile buzzed in her apron. Her hand hovered over her pocket and Scarlett shot her a knowing glance.

  Whoa, if a text had the ability to make the blood rush, what would seeing him in the flesh do to her? With her back to Scarlett and her mother, she pulled the phone from her apron pocket and glanced at the message.

  Any chance of making that dinner date asap? I’ll cook?

  Ellie shut the dishwasher. ‘Popping to the bathroom,’ she muttered, but the others were intent on decorating the cake. She took the chance to escape to the cloakroom off the hall. Her fingers were still floury but she didn’t want to wait.

  I owe you one, so I’ll cook.

  She rinsed and dried her hands while waiting for the reply.

  Let’s go halves. You provide the dessert.

  Winking smiley. Wow. Ellie’s thumb hovered over the keyboard. She was hot under the collar and it hadn’t been caused by the heat of the Aga.

  OK. When?

  Weds night?

  Ellie replied with a Looking forward to it and one kiss. God, was that too obvious? But then she’d be naïve to think that Aaron was only inviting her over for a tiramisu or an apple crumble. She pictured him in the cottage sitting room, firelight glowing, pulling her down onto the sofa. Taking off his shirt and revealing that army-honed body. The thought sent a jolt of lust through her. In her fantasy, he started to take off her top and undo her bra— Arghh. She didn’t need to dwell on that part too much, there was nothing honed about her these days.

  ‘Ellie!’

  ‘Shit!’ The phone clattered onto the Minton tiles.

  ‘Ellie, we’ve put the cake into the oven. Are you OK?’

  ‘Yeah, sure. Dropped my phone.’ She checked the screen; miraculously it seemed to have survived without any damage.

  ‘You were on your phone in the loo? Yuk.’

  ‘Yeah, like you never do it.’ Ellie opened the door. ‘Actually, I’d finished and was washing my hands.’

  ‘That’s too much information.’

  ‘Then you shouldn’t come knocking on the door of the bathroom.’

  ‘We wanted to ask you about the Aga. Have we put the cake in the right place? You’re always saying it’s temperamental.’

  While they finished clearing away, Ellie could not stop her thoughts wandering back to her upcoming date with Aaron. Never mind Scarlett getting her heart broken – it was Ellie herself who needed to be wary.

  Chapter Thirteen

  A few days later, Scarlett pulled off her wetsuit and pulled on her sweatshirt as she got changed under Jude’s surfer robe, which was still warm from his body. Her own was tingling all over after her swim in the sea, but he’d been right, the water was surprisingly bearable even though it was the middle of November. She was so glad she hadn’t chickened out of the trip, and not only because it was an excuse to escape the taut atmosphere at the manor.

  While the baking session had created a brief truce, it was only a temporary respite from the tension simmering between Scarlett and her mother.

  Jude had chosen a glorious day and driven her to a remote cove in the far west. She’d wondered where the heck they were going when he’d parked in a lay-by and led her over
a stile and between two houses. After what seemed like miles, the path had zig-zagged steeply down and the sea had come into view. En route, Jude pointed out plants and took out some binoculars so that Scarlett could spot some choughs, the red-legged, red-beaked crows that even she knew were very rare. Then, almost out of nowhere, the cliff edge loomed. The final approach was another scramble down rocks, so they’d thrown their rucksacks onto the powdery sand and clambered after them.

  They were alone on the beach, with only a turquoise sea crashing onto the sands. With a clear blue sky above them, the view was idyllic despite it being November. Jude had gone into the sea in only his board shorts, and she hadn’t even tried not to ogle his lean body. She was pretty sure he had an all-over tan too, and suspected he might normally do most of his wild swimming in the nude. That thought made her physically tingle and heat race to her cheeks, and she’d forced herself to refocus on wriggling into the wetsuit he’d loaned her, a thick steamer type that wrinkled around her knees and ankles. They’d swum in a deep pool created by a sandbar, and although she felt like a seal, bobbling around in the squidgy neoprene, it had been a huge treat to swim in the open air. Finally, they’d raced towards the open sea – or in her case, waddled – for a quick dip in the waves.

  Now she was glad to put her layers back on and join Jude by the campfire he’d made up in a pebble hearth with driftwood and dried seaweed. When he’d taken a box of matches from his bag and shielded the flame before lighting it, she’d laughed out loud.

  ‘I thought you might have rubbed two sticks together or something.’

  ‘I’m not Bear Grylls, you know.’ He rolled his eyes then smiled. ‘I could use a flint, but it could take a while. I’m guessing you’d like to warm up.’

  ‘If anyone told me a few months ago that I’d be sitting by a fire on the beach after going swimming in November I wouldn’t have believed them.’ She was also amazed at how relaxed she felt in his company, even after the awkwardness of donning – and peeling off – the wetsuit with him next to her.