Evangeline, Alone. (Book 1): Evangeline, Alone

by Styles, M. A.

  “If you mix these together,” She pulled four out of the group. “It should just turn a brown color.”

  “Thanks, I’ll remember that,” Mac said as she put those four to the side. “We’ll probably only need one or two more. About one container per box. Are there any specific colors you would like to keep?”

  “Oh, no, that’s ok. I usually just draw in here mostly. So I use the colored pencils, pastels, charcoal, that kind of stuff. This would be more for the little kids to, like, fill bottles with or something, I guess.”

  “Were you a student here?” Mac asked as she started putting the containers she didn’t need back on the top shelf.

  “Yeah, but not really. I’m not a genius kid or anything. My mom got a job here and they said I could go for free. We could even have a room here if we wanted to. Until maybe my mom could get better. They were going to teach regular courses too, so I would’ve been able to still graduate. I just like drawing.”

  “I can see that.” She put the last jar away, and closed the doors, latching it tight. “Do you mind if I take a look?” she asked, pointing to the desk where she saw Anna sitting when she first came in.

  “Ok, sure, I guess.”

  They left all of their makeshift cement supplies and rounded the corner of the bookshelf. Mac could see that it was most likely supposed to have been the office for the art teacher, but Anna had made it her own. Up on the wall, in black, handmade cardboard frames, were expertly rendered portraits. Mac immediately recognized the faces: Jack and Cara, Laila, Charlie, Magda, Anna’s mother, and the rest of the Block. The children’s portraits looked like them, but much younger, and tinged with sadness. They must have been done in the first few months here. There were two drawings she did not recognize.

  “I do one for everyone who lives here. Like a yearbook, or something.”

  “Who are these guys?” She pointed to two portraits scattered towards the middle.

  “Oh.” Her eyes fell suddenly and her shoulders slumped. “The one with the glasses is Mr. Stark. He was going to be the janitor for the place. And the other one was Mr. Cooper, the math teacher here.”

  Mac took a good look at Mr. Cooper’s face sketched in charcoal. He looked like a kind man. She started to mix his feature’s with Chris’s in her mind then stopped herself. “Did they leave? Headed back towards their other homes?”

  “Yes.” She looked back up at Mac real quick. “Well, kind of, but not- not really. They were both here the whole time with us, up until a few months ago. A bit before you came. Mr. Stark said he lived pretty close by, and had lots of stuff he could bring over for us. To help. So Mr. Cooper volunteered to go with him. All the other ones, the people who usually go out there for us, they were saying it could wait until it got warmer. I heard them talking once and they didn’t even think the stuff would still be there, because someone would’ve already found it. Mr. Stark lived in an apartment building. But he was getting nervous I think. About having enough. So they went. And that was it.”

  “And never came back?”

  “Yeah…” She looked back up at their pictures. “They were both really nice.”

  “I’m sure they were.” Mac looked up at them with Anna for a long, silent moment. Then all the other portraits around them. “They’re really good,” Mac told her with sincerity, because they were.

  “Thanks,” she blushed. “Do you think I could do yours? Do you plan on staying?”

  Mac kept looking from one drawn face to the next. “I don’t know. I don’t really stay in one place.”

  “Oh.” She looked down at the ground in disappointment, a bit embarrassed.

  “But I mean, I’ve been here for a pretty long time. What do you think? Honorary Blockian?” Mac gave her a wink. “And I’m sure I’ll come by to see how you guys are doing and hangout for a while after I get you all settled.”

  Anna gave her a smile. “Alright.” She walked over to her work area and opened a drawer. She reached in and pulled out a Polaroid camera, though one of the reboots. “I take one of everybody and work from that so you don’t have to sit for a long time and stand still. There was no way I was going to be able to do the kids if I didn’t.”

  She grabbed Mac by the shoulder and led her over to a wall that was still plain, untouched, white painted cinderblocks and pushed her back against it. Mac raised her eyebrows as she waited for further instruction. The girl looked at her thoughtfully, then reached up and gently moved her chin up and to the side.

  “Ok, just look over that way.” Then there was a click, a flash, and the whir of the film coming out of the bottom. “Thanks!” she said, and she skipped over to the desk again.

  Mac started back towards the materials she was supposed to bring over to the side door near the work area outside. She watched through the open bookshelf as Anna gave her photo a little useless shake and then placed it on top of her sketch book. She opened up one of the desk drawers and tossed the camera in on top of what looked like all of the other polaroids of the Block. Mac started to gather all the boxes and containers together, attempting to find a configuration that would allow her to carry them all without dropping them one by one out of her arms on the walk.

  “Here,” Anna said, jumping up from her chair. She darted behind another set of lower shelves and came out rolling a small cart. One by one the girl loaded up the top of it for Mac.

  “Thanks, kid,” Mac said, giving her a smile.

  “Sure,” she said, following her out towards the door. “You know we’re kind of neighbors.” Mac made a little sound of acknowledgement. “Across the hall, pretty much. If you guys ever need any help with any thing, or whatever, I’m right there. Or here.” She shrugged her shoulders.

  Mac stopped for a minute. “Sure. What about your mom? Would she want to help too?”

  Anna cleared her throat a little then took a breath. She gave Mac a knowing look. “No, and I think you know that. And that’s fine. She pretty much sleeps all day. And night. I check on her and make sure she eats stuff. She’d be fine with me helping.”

  “Alright,” Mac said, and knocked on the cart. “Thanks again, for all your help.” She rolled the cart off towards the side door, hearing the girl close the door to the art room behind her.

  She thought about what her life was like as a 15 year old, and though it was obviously quite a different situation, she was sure she was equally as lonely then too, like Anna. The cart wobbled at one wheel while she thought of bits and pieces of her childhood until she reached the end of the hallway. She looked out the wired glass of the door and saw dusk was almost over. She gently shook the thoughts from her head. Most of the Block would be beginning to settle in for the night, but she knew a few who were going to be downstairs waiting to unwind from the day. She wasn’t one of them, but she wanted to check in.

  With a sigh, she headed back to the main staircase and around to its back, heading down to the sub-level. When she reached the bottom, she stopped to tighten the laces of her boot, and heard something from an area she had never fully checked out. Behind the set of steps in the gym were a few doors. One was a large room filled with gear like balls, pinnies, some gym clothes, and such. The other was what would’ve been a place for the P.E. Teacher’s office. Mac really didn’t know what the set up was supposed to be. A small one at the far end she remembered was like a janitor’s closet. The servers and a few fuse boxes were all the way at the end, near the locker room. Not too large, it was basically the size of a nice walk-in closet, but with the majority of it was filled with a large shelf and all the coinciding contraptions that went with having an in-house server and large Wi-Fi capabilities. It was also an area to store extra tech parts and the like.

  The sound was faint, muffled. At first, she thought it was a machine whirring here and there. She crept a little closer to the door. Her ears strained against the silence and the distant voices and laughter of the ones in the cafeteria. When she reached the door is was easier to hear, but not to decipher. Her hand twisted
the knob, and when the latch in the doorframe wound in releasing it, a loud scrape of metal broke the quiet, and the strange sound that brought her there stopped. She walked into a dark room with a few blinking lights. She heard a whir of something, maybe some unit’s fan switching on, and her head whipped towards it involuntarily. She was used to certain noises in the dark that would’ve made anyone jump before, but the sounds of mechanics switching on were not a sound anyone was used to now.

  “Shit,” she said under her breath, as her chest heaved from the sudden adrenaline.

  Something made a noise like a piece of cardboard being slid across the floor at the back, behind the shelving unit.

  “Hello?” As her eyes started focusing through the darkness she noticed a faint, warm light in the back towards the ground. She slowly stepped around the corner of the shelves and took a peek.

  Behind the unit there was a basic small, gray metal desk in the corner. In the other corner, laid a mattress on the floor. She found Liam up against the wall. He wore a small reading light on his forehead attached to a head band, and he was curled with his legs to his chest, clutching a book to his knees.

  “Liam? It’s Mac,” she said, softly, not moving any closer in.

  “Oh, hello Ms. Mac. Sorry about that. I didn’t think I was bothering anyone in here.”

  He spoke in a way that was forced cheerfulness. The glow of the headlamp showed half wiped tear streaks down his face and swollen eyes.

  “Umm, no you didn’t bother anyone. Or me,” she said, realizing the sound she heard was him weeping in the dark. “I just-“

  He quickly interrupted her. “I come here for a little quiet sometimes.” He began to shuffle around a bit in an attempt to draw her attention to other parts of the room and away from his face.

  “Ok. I like the fourth floor for that.”

  “Ah, yes. A few do. A little too open and uncomfortable for me. Plus the climb.” He made a comical face of disgust. “All those stairs.”

  “Yeah. I guess most of the Block just goes down here to the cafeteria instead or the common room.”

  He gave her a nod, but his eyes were moving back and forth, and his mouth was pursed together.

  “Liam?”

  “Yes?” he said with more forced cheerfulness.

  She just looked at him. Not with much expression, but with a kind face, and let her silent pause send the message. Then she did what she normally did: waited.

  “I just-“ He cleared his throat and gave a little chuckle. “I just don’t know what I expected. You know? I, uh- I just figured, I don’t know. I’ve seen them before. You know? Outside the walls. I knew what they would look like.” He looked up at her for a moment and she gave him a dip of her chin to show she understood. “But I never, uh…”

  “It’s different.” He looked backed up at her when she said it. “To be right there, close. To touch one, or be touched by one. To be-“ She paused in thought. “Surprised by one. I know. Even for ones like me who’ve dealt with it a lot.”

  He shook his head up and down and gave her a tight smile as his eyes started to glisten a bit.

  “I just never thought about-” He took a big swallow and his eyes looked over at the ground next to the mattress, staying there for a moment.

  Mac took a step into his little space and crouched down to see what he was looking at. His headlamp shown on the backpack he had taken from the basement. She cleared her throat and sat down crossed legged on the floor at the end of the mattress.

  “Yeah. I know. It’s easy to see the monster. Harder to see the person.” He looked back at her and sniffled, a tear rolling down his cheek. “But what you saw was the monster. The person is gone.”

  He nodded his head again so she knew he was listening.

  “I’m not saying that should make it easier. For some people it just never gets easier, but it has to be done. I’m not going to say you’ll ever be comfortable with it, or should be. Or even get used to it, and that’s fine. But I think if you do have to deal with it more, you’ll start being better prepared for it.”

  He gave her another nod and raised his hand up to wipe his cheek. She noticed the book he was holding slide down to the mattress. It was the purple notebook.

  “And I don’t think that was her, that we met down there,” she said to him with a small, soft smile, as she pointed her chin to the notebook.

  He shook his head. “Yeah, alright.” He gave her a little sad smirk.

  In all honesty, she really didn’t think that legless body was the girl with the backpack. If Mac had to guess, she would’ve said the poor thing was the one laying strewn about on top of the rusty stain. The unopened liquor showed someone who wanted to fit in with partiers, but was not the type that partied like they did. And if for some reason someone asked what Mac thought had really happened down there, she’d tell them that the other four O.D.’d on some bad stuff one night. And while she slept uninhibited, they turned, and they took her. But she knew, even if Liam asked her what she thought happened, she would say she didn’t really have a clue, and it didn’t matter.

  “So, I hope you plan on at least offering your find to the wolves out there.” She gestured to the cafeteria where the faint sound of people laughing still carried into the closet.

  “Hm? Oh, the vodka? I don’t care. They can have it.” He slid the bag to Mac.

  “I think you should bring it to them and sit with us for a while.” He looked at her with tired eyes. “You don’t even have to drink it. Or you could.” She smiled at him reaching into the bag, taking out the juice and vodka and handing it to him. “But I know it might be better to be out there,” She pointed to the door. “Than in here,” and she pointed to his head. “What do you say? You coming with?”

  He swallowed hard again, but gave her a weak, genuine smile, “I suppose it won’t hurt.”

  “It might in the morning,” she laughed, pointing to the bottle laying on the mattress. Then she stretched out her hand as she stood up, and he took it. He rose up with the two bottles and looked back down at the pack at her feet. “Do you want to keep it? It’s good to have one, but I understand if this isn’t the one.” She bent down and picked it up.

  “There’s more in there,” he said, a bit of himself coming back.

  She gave him an intrigued look, and felt the outside of the pack. She gave the smaller front pouch a squeeze, and then gave him a surprised look. The front unzipped loudly in the small space, and she reached in through a few pens and pencils and pulled out a granola bar and a candy bar. “Damn!”

  He smiled and looked down at his feet. “I suppose I should share them with everyone.” He looked back up meekly at her.

  She thought for a moment. “Fuck ‘em. They’re yours.”

  The smile he gave her then was big, showing some teeth, and he chuckled as he shook his head in agreement. She handed him back the backpack, and he put the bottles in it. Then he took the bars from her. He put the granola bar back in the front pocket, then ripped open the top of the chocolate bar and bit off a huge piece. He groaned in delight as he chewed away.

  “Oh, yeah,” he said, still working on the nougat, caramel, and chocolate. “Fuck ‘em!” He offered her some.

  She broke off a piece from the top and popped it into her mouth. As soon as she began chewing, she looked back at him as she shook her head up and down. “Oh yeah. Definitely fuck them.” And he laughed some more as he took another bite before he had even finished chewing the first, smiling the whole time. He offered her the last bit, but she declined. “That’s all yours, buddy. Enjoy it.”

  He took it and crumbled up the brown wrapper, tossing it onto the top of the small desk in the corner. His jaw worked hard to chew through the dense sweetness, but she saw it did what she hoped it would. Color was returning to his face, and there was enough time for his eyes to look much less red and puffy. He was the reason she was even down there in the first place. She wasn’t going to leave him to the wolves before, and she wasn’t going
to now when he was already at his lowest point.

  “Come on, let’s go,” she said as she watched him swallow the last bit. She waved her hand at him to follow, and walked out the door.

  When she turned back, he was sheepishly exiting, closing the door behind him, and locking it. She looked down at his sneakers as he pulled the key out of the knob, noticing they were much dirtier than they were this morning before they went out. Then it dawned on her. Liam may have worked here, but he wasn’t going to live here. He was here by chance when it all happened. He only had what he came here with, like a few others. He didn’t have boots to change into, and that orange jacket was likely the only jacket he had. His normal attire was a pair of pretty worn cargo pants, and usually a Benson Academy shirt. He turned back to her, sliding a little ring of keys into his pocket, and she quickly shifted her gaze back to his face giving him a quick smile.

  “Off we go then, yeah?” he said, and he took up step next to her.

  When they entered the cafeteria, it was fuller than she had ever seen it. Everyone who went out with them earlier was there, plus Mike, the gate guards just off duty, Nate, and even Magda. Nate stood up from a bench and started clapping at Liam.

  “There he is!” Joe yelled as he spun around and headed for Liam. “Let’s drink!”

  Mac quickly interceded and grabbed the bottles out of Liam’s hand. “Grab some cups and ice,” she said to Joe. You could tell he didn’t like it, but he did it. Especially with Magda sitting right there.

  He walked into the kitchen and started to put the plastic cups that were always stacked on the counter out. Then he grabbed a bowl and began dumping out ice cubes from a couple trays stored in the freezer. He put that down with a bang next to the cups as everyone started to make their way over.

  “Put a few cubes in each glass, please,” Mac said as she began to unscrew the cap on the vodka bottle, breaking the plastic seal with a crack. He took a deep breath, scowling, but he did that too.