Whiteout Conditions

by Kendel Duncan

  Me? Caysun thought. Casey is the one who’d disappeared. Why would he think…….

  “O’Toole,” he growled quietly.

  “He told me he’d killed you.”

  “I left, Case. I thought he’d killed you and I couldn’t stay there anymore. And I heard he was going to start selling kids, Case. Fucking kids!”

  “I….oh fuck,” Casey groaned, his body contorting as it spasmed. He screamed, “Stop! Make it stop!”

  “You’re almost there, Case. A bath will help. Do you think you’re done on the toilet for now?”

  Casey groaned but he managed to nod his head.

  Caysun grabbed toilet paper and tilted Casey’ body forward enough for him to wipe and then flush. Then he pulled the sweatpants off his feet, lifted the t-shirt over his head and dropped everything to the floor.

  Then he scooped Casey into his arms and stepped into the tub. He lowered slowly, not wanting the temperature to shock Casey’s battered body. He sat with his back against the end opposite from the faucet, with Casey between his legs and then he began gently massaging Casey’s arms.

  After washing the vomit out of the bowl, Miguel knelt next to the tub, “Can I help?”

  “Massage his thighs and calves, gently.”

  Miguel pulled his t-shirt over his head, tossed it behind him and then stuck his hands in the water.

  Casey hissed and tried to turn to his side, “Hurts so bad,” he said through chattering teeth.

  “I know, bud, I know.”

  “I’m gonna puke,” he groaned.

  Miguel grabbed the bowl and got it under his mouth just in time for him to yak into it without it getting any in the water.

  When he finished, he dropped his head back onto Caysun’s chest with a thump.

  Miguel dumped the contents into the toilet, flushed and rinsed the bowl again. When he returned to kneel on the floor again, Vaughn walked back in with a small glass of purple liquid.

  “House is secure,” he said as he set it down on the counter. “JD called Doyle. Two men are on the way to help guard the place.” His eyes dipped and he frowned when he took in Casey’s shaking hands and trembling body, “Should we take him to a hospital?”

  “They’re just going to pump him full of different drugs to keep him quiet. Detoxing this way is harder but it’s better, for him.”

  Vaughn frowned again, “How…….” he said before realizing once again that now was not the time.

  Caysun sighed, “My younger brother. Took three detoxes before it stuck. He’d been sober three years when he was killed by an IED in Iraq.”

  “Oh damn, babe. I’m so sorry.”

  “Shotgun? Is that you?” Casey mumbled.

  “It is, Case. I’m here.”

  “We never fucked.”

  Random, Caysun thought as he smiled up at Vaughn.

  “No, we didn’t.”

  “Felt wrong,” Casey mumbled.

  “Yeah, it did.”

  “You should meet my brother. I’ll bet you’d like him.”

  Now Vaughn was smiling too as he kept his eyes locked with Caysun’s.

  “Yeah? Why’s that?” Caysun said.

  “He needs someone strong who will stand up to him.”

  “And you think I’m that guy?”

  “Yeah, you are,” Casey said, at the same time that Vaughn dipped his chin in a nod.

  “Not now though,” Casey continued.

  “Why not now?”

  “I don’t want him to see me like this.”

  Vaughn winced as if he’d been struck.

  “Case, this isn’t your fault. Our bastard of a boss did this to you.”

  Another round of shivers racked Casey’s body as he mumbled, “I k-k-k-k-k-know. I j-j-j-just don’t w-w-w-want him to s-s-see me. I f-f-f-fucking shit myself, Shotgun. I hate that you s-s-saw that.”

  “Case, none of this is your fault. You’re sick. If I was sick, you’d take care of me. Remember that time I got food poisoning and I threw up in the car. It took you three weeks to find all the puke between the door and seat.”

  A small smile lifted one side of Casey’s dry lips and Vaughn almost shouted with joy at seeing it there.

  “Yeah, it did,” Casey mumbled. Then his face contorted in pain, “Need toilet.”

  Both Miguel and Caysun began to move but when Vaughn took in their wet, slippery arms, he stepped forward. “Let me,” he said in a tone that left no room for argument.

  Miguel moved like his ass was on fire, backing into the corner out of the way as Vaughn leaned down, scooped Casey into his arms and set him on the toilet. He knelt on one knee as he kept a firm hold on Casey so that he didn’t slide off.

  Casey’s forehead was resting on Vaughn’s shoulder.

  He hiccupped once and then threw up all over Vaughn.

  “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, sorry, I’m so fucking sorry,” he mumbled.

  And then Vaughn started laughing.

  “Vaughn?” Casey whispered as he forced his head up to look into Vaughn’s eye.

  Vaughn grinned, “I’m so damn glad to see you, brother.”

  “But, but I just yakked all over you.”

  “I know. And I’m so fucking glad that you did.”

  “Why?”

  “Because it means you’re alive brother. I’ll take all the puke you want to give me over the pain of believing you were dead any day, any fucking day, brother.”

  Thirty-Three

  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  Miguel

  Watching the scene in front of him, Miguel was struck with so many emotions, he didn’t know which he should focus on. All of them? None? Should he just quietly leave the room, grab his shit and leave? He could. He could run away with his tail between his legs like the dog he was. But in all reality, he couldn’t.

  He’d done this.

  He had to make things right. He needed to just as much as he needed his next breath.

  Plus, this was his place so where was he gonna go?

  It wasn’t until the stench of vomit finally penetrated through his muddled thoughts that he was able to move.

  “I’ll go get you some clothes to change into,” he mumbled as he shuffled past.

  He heard the water slosh behind him and he knew that the man in the tub, Caysun he remembered, was either getting out or moving around, most likely to help hold Casey while the brother got cleaned up.

  When he walked back into the bathroom, it was to find Casey crying on Vaughn’s shoulder while Vaughn gripped the back of his neck. “You’re going to be okay, brother. We’ll get you through this, I swear it.”

  “We?” Casey mumbled as he pulled back and that’s when he saw Caysun in the tub. “Shotgun? When did you? How? Oh my god, why are you naked? We didn’t fuck, did we? Tell me we didn’t fuck? Oh god, if we did, I might just throw up again.”

  “Wow, bud, am I that disgusting?”

  Casey snorted a laugh and it was like music to Miguel’s ears.

  “Vaughn?”

  “Yeah bro?”

  “Are you hugging me while I’m on the toilet?”

  “Yep.”

  “Worst moment of my life,” Casey mumbled.

  “Not for me. Do you want to know what the worst moment of my life was? It was the moment you disappeared and I thought you might be dead. I almost gave up there for a while.”

  “But you didn't.”

  “No, I didn’t.”

  “Because you’re my brother.”

  “I am.”

  “You both are,” Casey said as he looked at the two men, “Wait, you’re both here? Do you know each other?”

  Vaughn looked over at Caysun, “We do now.”

  “How?”

  “He found me,” Caysun said with a smile.

  “Actually, we kind of found each other,” Vaughn said, smiling as he looked at Caysun.

  The feelings between the two of them were so obvious, anyone would see it, even someone in the middle of a drug
detox.

  Casey smiled and once again Miguel was struck with how beautiful the man was when he smiled.

  “Good, I’m glad. You deserve that, Vaughn. You both do.”

  “I, I think I’m done now,” Casey whispered.

  “Okay,” Vaughn said as he pulled of a section of toilet paper and handed it to Casey. “I’m going to hand you off to Cay so he can finish getting you cleaned up and then I’ll shower while he gets you back into bed, okay?”

  Casey nodded as he reached behind to flush.

  Caysun started the shower then stepped out long enough to pull Casey into his arms and step back in.

  Once he did, Vaughn stood up and stripped off his clothes.

  As he reached for a towel to wrap around his waist, he narrowed his eyes at Miguel, “I need to know everything when I’m done in here.”

  Miguel looked down at the floor as he nodded, “Yes, Sir.” He knew that guilt was written all over his face but that didn’t scare him. He wasn’t trying to hide it from Vaughn. He knew the man would hate him, he was ready for that.

  What he wasn’t ready for was the moment that Casey realized that he was the one who had given him the drugs in the first place. Because then Casey would hate him. And he wasn’t ready for that, he would never be ready for that.

  The moment that Casey looked at him with hatred in his eyes? It would kill him.

  He turned away then, unable to take seeing another moment of the love and tenderness without it breaking his heart.

  He pulled the sheets off the bed and quickly replaced them with a clean set.

  “Do you have something clean for him to wear?” Caysun said as he and Casey emerged from the bathroom wearing nothing but towels.

  It was the first time Miguel had seen Casey on his feet. He wasn’t standing, not exactly. Caysun’s arm was firmly wrapped around the man’s waist, propping him up against his body, but technically the man was upright. That was good to see. It was also a little shocking too because Miguel hadn’t realized that the man was actually a few inches taller than his own six feet.

  “Sí, yes, of course,” he mumbled as he went to the dresser and pulled open a drawer. Inside were several pairs of sweats and at least a dozen t-shirts.

  “Do you want something too?”

  Caysun glanced down at his clothes on the floor, “I was going to put my shit back on, but they could use a washing first, so, yeah, that’d be nice. Thanks.”

  “Certainly. Would you, um, can I get you something to eat?”

  Caysun looked at Casey, who shook his head, “Not yet,” he mumbled.

  “You need to eat, Case.”

  “I know shotgun, and I will, just not right now, okay?”

  “Yeah. I want you to try sipping some juice though.”

  Casey nodded his head.

  Together they made their way over to the bed. Caysun helped Casey sit down and then he put his feet into the pants that Miguel handed him.

  “Is he going to find us?” he said without looking up.

  “I don’t know. Maybe? Probably? The house isn’t in my name. But I’m worried about my mamá and my tía. If he takes them, if he hurts them, I….”

  “That won’t happen. We won’t let it. I’ll call Morgan and have him send more men to protect them.”

  A knock on the door had their heads swiveling.

  When Caysun looked back at Miguel and saw the terrified look on his face, he said, “I seriously doubt O’Toole, or his men would knock. Can you finish helping Casey get dressed and get him into bed?”

  “Sí,” he whispered as he walked over.

  Caysun left the room and Miguel knelt at Casey’s feet.

  He tried not to look at the penis that was right in front of his face. And he definitely didn’t look up. He couldn’t handle looking into the eyes of the man that he had hurt.

  He froze when he felt Casey’s hand move to the back of his head, the long fingers sifting through his hair. “I remember you,” he said.

  Everything in Miguel froze, including his heart. His hands began shaking. He squeezed his eyes shut. This was the moment that all hope would cease to exist for him.

  “What do you remember, señor?” he whispered.

  “I remember your voice. You read to me.”

  Miguel tilted his head up and looked into the eyes of the man who had mystified, confused, intrigued and ultimately melted his heart.

  What he saw in Casey’s eyes almost knocked him back on his ass.

  Casey was looking at him with affection.

  God, what he wouldn’t give for him to always look at him that way.

  He returned to sliding the pants up Casey’s legs, “That’s just how I read, aloud I mean.”

  “Well, it helped. Your voice is nice, it’s soothing.”

  Miguel pushed to his feet, still bent over at the waist, “Hold onto my shoulders so I can pull you to your feet.”

  Casey did but Miguel kind of missed his fingers in his hair.

  He helped Casey into the bed and got him settled down under the covers.

  Just as he was turning to leave, Casey reached out to grab his wrist. “Will you read to me?”

  “Oh, um, I….”

  “Please?”

  “Sí,” he whispered as he sat on the bed next to Casey. He pulled out his phone that he had downloaded a wonderful gay romance, with a ranch owner and a drifter, and he began to read.

  He thought maybe this was the best moment in his life.

  He was wrong.

  The best moment was when Casey rested his head on Miguel’s chest.

  Miguel swallowed down the lump in his throat and continued with the story.

  Thirty-Four

  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  Grainger

  He stepped into the bathroom, closed the door and leaned back against it. He couldn’t believe that he was getting this worked up right now. What kind of an asshole gets painfully turned on when their boyfriend is recovering from a major injury and surgery?

  He’d never been that kind of guy before. He liked sex, but he’d never felt out of control. He’d hooked up with guys in bars before but only when he went looking for it. He’d never gone out just for fun and met someone that he couldn’t keep his hands off of.

  He had now.

  And that someone was sitting in Grainger’s bed….recovering from fucking surgery.

  “I’m such a fucking prick,” he mumbled.

  “No, you’re not. Now let me in.”

  Grainger yanked the door open, “Did you walk over here by yourself?”

  “Yes, Grainger, I am capable of walking.”

  “No, I, that’s not what I meant, I…”

  “Grainger?”

  “Yes?”

  “Kiss me.”

  “Sylas,” he said with a sigh.

  “No, Grainger. Please don’t make me wait anymore. I’ve been waiting for almost a week while I’ve been confined to your bed. A week, Grainger. A week where I had to wake up to you sleeping next to me and know that I couldn’t hold you the way I wanted to, a week of you helping me bathe and not being able to touch you the way I wanted to, I week of longing, a week of wanting, a week of hoping, a week of waiting. I’m tired of waiting, Grainger. Can you at least tell me why?”

  “Why, what?”

  “Why you won’t kiss me.”

  “Because I’m afraid that if I start, I won’t be able to stop.”

  “So? Why is that a problem?”

  “Sylas, not only are you injured but you’re also a, a, a….fuck,” he mumbled, raking his hands through his hair as he turned away.

  “I’ve already told you I wasn’t a virgin. I’ve had sex, Grainger.”

  “I know that. What I meant is that you are a beautiful soul who deserves better than what I can give you.”

  Sylas rolled his eye, “Really, Grainger? How do you know what you can give me when you haven’t even fucking tried?”

  “Because I know me. I’ll just fu
ck it up.”

  Sylas stared for a few seconds as his frustration ate him up inside. Then he turned and put his hand on the doorknob. “I’m just going to pack up my things and call a cab,” he mumbled.

  “Sylas, no,” Grainger said with a gasp

  “Yes, Grainger. I’m not going to stay another minute where I’m not wanted.”

  He started to pull the door open only to have it shoved closed as Grainger slapped his hands on either side of Sylas’ shoulders, caging him against it with his body. And then the man behind him growled, he fucking growled.

  “Are you….” Sylas began to say only to have a hand clamp over his mouth, silencing him.

  “Shhhhh, don’t talk right now. Please,” Grainger whispered.

  All the fight left Sylas’ body in a whoosh of air as his forehead rested on the door.

  Grainger’s forehead came down onto Sylas’ shoulder, his chest pressed against Sy’s back.

  Sylas could feel the man’s heart beating wildly in his chest.

  “I won’t hurt you,” he whispered, “Don’t let me hurt you.”

  “I won’t.”

  Grainger pulled back far enough to encourage Sylas to turn around and then he pressed their foreheads together.

  He slid his fingers down Sylas’ waist until he reached the bottom of his t-shirt. He slid underneath the hem and slowly pushed it up until the healing scar was exposed.

  The bandage and stitches had been removed a few days ago.

  “Does this hurt?” he whispered as he gently caressed the tips of his fingers over the raised scar.

  “No. It’s more numb, right now, like the nerve endings are gone and need to rebuild.”

  Grainger’s fingers moved down beneath the elastic of Sy’s sweatpants, “And this?”

  Now Sy’s heart was beating just as wildly as Grainger’s, “No, that definitely does not hurt.”

  Grainger’s head pulled back and he locked his heated gaze with Sy’s as his fingers moved to the soft skin at the top of Sylas’ pelvis, “This?”

  “It tickles a little, but it doesn’t hurt,” Sy whispered on a shaky exhale.

  Grainger watched as his fingers slid back and forth over the smooth skin, occasionally tickling just the tops of Sylas’ pubes. Sy’s arousal was very evident as it tented the front of his pants, his pre-cum forming a wet spot.