All of Me (Heart of Stone Book 11)

by K. M. Scott

  Diana sniffled and looked up at me for confirmation of what her sister told her. “I hope she’s stronger than I am because I feel like I’m about to fall apart. Every time I think of Mommy not coming out of it…”

  She didn’t finish her sentence and covered her face as she began to cry again. Silently, I prayed for Ethan to hurry up and get there. Out of all of us, only he might know what to say to calm her.

  When her sobbing subsided, she wiped her face again and forced herself to smile. “I want to see her. Can I see her?” she asked, her voice still trembling.

  “Sure. I just want you to understand that she looks like she’s sleeping, but I know she can hear everything we say. I know you might want to cry, but she needs us to be strong and positive, okay? If it’s too much for you, I want you to take some time out here, honey.”

  Taking a deep breath, Diana tried to calm herself. “Okay, Daddy. I promise to be positive when I’m in there. I don’t want Mommy to worry.”

  Tressa chuckled as we turned to go back into the ICU. “You know she will if she hears us crying or worrying. I swear she has a sixth sense about those kinds of things. You don’t even have to tell her you’re upset. She just knows.”

  I smiled at how right she was about that. “I think it’s a mother’s instinct. Whatever it is, I have a feeling it’s a female thing because unless I see you crying in front of me, I’m never sure if you’re upset or not.”

  “That’s not true, Daddy. You just deal with us differently than Mommy does. She’s never reluctant to get all emotional with us. You’re more the strong, silent type,” Diana said as she grabbed my hand.

  Giving it a squeeze, she added, “But we love you for that.”

  I felt her fingers tighten around mine as we walked toward Nina’s room, so I tried to keep her mood light. “Can you imagine if both your mother and I were the emotional type? That sounds messy,” I said with a forced chuckle.

  Just then, she stopped and looked in at her mother. Her face twisted into a look of horror. “Oh, Daddy. I know I said I’d be positive, but I’ve never seen Mommy look like this.”

  Leaning in toward her, Tressa whispered, “Think of her as sleeping. That’s all this is. They gave her medicine to make her sleep. That’s it. Come to think of it, I imagine after raising triplets she could use a few days of uninterrupted sleep, don’t you? We were quite the handful growing up.”

  Diana kept her tight hold on my hand and took a deep breath. “We were. I was always sick, Ethan was always doing something he shouldn’t have been doing, and you were always bossing everyone around.”

  Her sister laughed and put her arm around her. “I like to think of it as preparing for my adult life. Now let’s go in and let her know we’re right here with her.”

  We walked in, and I sat down in what I already thought of as my usual seat next to Nina’s bed. I hated that this had been normalized in some small way in my mind so soon. Tressa and Diana stood holding hands on the other side of the bed saying nothing as they stared at her lying perfectly still.

  Leaning toward Nina, I said, “Honey, the girls are here with us. Tressa and Diana are right here.”

  “We were just talking about how you must need some rest after dealing with the three of us all those years, Mom,” Tressa said softly.

  I looked up at Diana and saw how hard she was trying to be strong. Choking back tears, she said in a quivering voice, “Hi, Mommy. I got here as soon as I could. I didn’t tell you that I’ve been driving, but I have and I drove here all by myself.”

  Regret filled me again at how Diana couldn’t take pride in what she’d done. For anyone else, being able to drive meant little. It was a rite of passage for teenagers, but for a grown woman, it was something expected if you lived outside the city.

  “Your mother is going to want to go for a ride with you,” I said with a smile.

  “We’ll go for a long ride, Mommy. Just as soon as you’re up and walking around, it’s a date,” Diana said in a tiny voice once again quivering with emotion.

  As the room fell silent, except for those damn machines, I looked down at Nina and repeated the silent prayer I’d said over and over that night.

  Please, God. Let her live. Let her come back to us. I can’t do this without her. I can’t.

  Chapter Eight

  Tristan

  After a little while, the three of us began to talk like everything would be fine, laughing and telling stories about Nina as a mother and a wife. I hoped she could hear what we said because the love our daughters had for her came through loud and clear. I sat there proud to say I was their father and her husband.

  Just as even Diana began to laugh, I heard a noise and saw Ethan stop dead in the doorway of Nina’s hospital room. All the blood drained from his face in a matter of seconds, and like Tressa had, he gripped the doorframe to hold himself up as he saw his mother for the first time.

  I needed him to keep his emotions in check, even though I hated having to demand that of him. He deserved to be able to feel whatever he had to, but I knew Diana would unravel if she saw her brother fall apart at the sight of his mother lying there.

  So I quickly walked over to greet him and leaned in to whisper, “She’s going to be fine, son. I promise. I know how hard this is, but if you don’t stay strong, Diana won’t either. Okay?”

  Stepping back, I looked into his eyes so similar to mine and saw tears. I wished I didn’t have to ask him to hide what he felt, but I needed to keep us all from falling apart during this, the worst our family had gone through since the car accident.

  He nodded and took a deep breath. “I’m okay, Dad. It was just the initial shock of seeing her like that.”

  I patted him on the shoulder, proud I had his help in this like I had Tressa’s. “I know. Thanks, Ethan.”

  Tressa immediately piped up with, “I told Dad and Diana that Mom finally is getting some rest after all those grueling years of raising us.”

  Ethan smiled and rolled his eyes. “And that’s without her not knowing half of the trouble I caused.”

  “Oh, she knew,” Diana said with a smile. “Do you remember that time when we were in fifth grade and the principal brought us all down to his office? He sat us down in front of his desk, and I almost burst into tears because I didn’t know what I could have done. I’d never been to the principal’s office before that.”

  Tressa laughed and shook her head. “You hadn’t even been back to school that year for very long. I remember how terrified you looked. I was scared too, but I’d been in to see Mr. Harvey for that time that I punched that awful Stevens kid. Do you remember how nasty he was? Every day he pulled my hair, and then one day, bam! I let him have it right in the face.”

  “Eric Stevens is a marriage counselor or something like that now, I think,” Ethan said, laughing as he walked over to stand next to me. “He probably just liked you, Tress, so he figured that was the way to get you to like him.”

  “Well, I hope he’s better at relationships now than he was back in grade school, or his patients are likely to be punching him in the face like I did,” Tressa said, rolling her eyes.

  Diana brought the conversation back to that day the three of them were called to the principal’s office together. I vaguely remembered the incident, but I did recall Nina telling me how she handled it and smiled. She’d always been a mama bear when it came to our children.

  “Mommy came in and listened to what Mr. Harvey said, mostly about Ethan causing trouble, and she asked why the two of us were there with him then. Mean old Mr. Harvey said we were his accomplices! I couldn’t believe it. I’d never helped Ethan with his trouble-making,” Diana said with a smile.

  “Oh, yeah. Mom listened all right and then gave that guy a lecture that I bet is still echoing in that school. I remember her face got all serious, and she pointed her finger at him, and I knew he was in for it. Then she said, ‘I don’t appreciate you dragging all three of my children down here because one of them has gotten himsel
f in trouble. This is no way to treat children either. If Ethan should get in trouble, then so be it, but his sisters don’t deserve this from you or the school district, Mr. Harvey.’ I thought Harvey was going to fall over,” Ethan explained.

  Tressa’s eyes grew wide, and she pointed across the room at him. “And then she told us all that it was time to leave and marched us right out of his office. She didn’t say a word all the way home, and the three of us sat in the back seat looking at one another and waiting for her to start yelling. But she said nothing the whole way.”

  “Then she sent Tressa and me to our room. I cried for an hour I was so upset.”

  “And Mom sat me down in the kitchen and gave me the talking to of my life. I think she threatened me with military school, if I’m remembering correctly,” Ethan said with a laugh. “She scared the hell out of me that day.”

  I patted Nina’s hand and quietly chuckled to myself. She never failed to be their champion when she had to, but when it came down to making sure they grew up to be the kind of people we knew they could be, she had no trouble putting her foot down.

  “When I got home from work that night, you three were already in bed. When I asked her what her day had been like, she twisted her face into a scowl and I’ll never forget she said, ‘Your son got his sisters called to the principal’s office today. I had to go get them, and I told that Mr. Harvey a thing or two about treating the girls the way they deserved instead of lumping them in with their brother. But you better have a talk with your son. I told him any more of this and he’s going to military school.’”

  The three of them laughed at hearing for the first time what she’d told me. “That was the first I’d heard of military school, so I asked her if she was serious. I didn’t think you had the temperament for that kind of school and was surprised she even suggested it.”

  His eyes wide, Ethan shook his head. “I didn’t have the temperament. I knew that even then. That’s why she scared me so much when she threatened to send me there.”

  “She never would have done that, but that was your mother’s attempt at scaring you into behaving. It didn’t completely work, but I think you did stay out of the principal’s office for the rest of the year,” I said.

  “Mom has always been strong. That’s why I told Diana not to worry. She’s going to be okay,” Tressa said quietly. “She might look like she’s all sugar and spice and everything nice, but she’s got a will of steel. She had to in order to handle the three of us.”

  I thought back to those first days after we finally had them all home. Twins had never unnerved me since I’d been one, but triplets? Could we handle three newborns?

  What we did in the beginning wasn’t so much handling them as attempting to not be overwhelmed by them. We’d gotten used to Ethan and Tressa while Diana remained in the hospital, but once the three of them were reunited, it seemed like they all got together and decided to challenge us. Ethan no longer wanted to sleep, while Tressa refused to eat when she used to.

  And Diana? She seemed to fuss all the time for the first weeks after she left the hospital. Nina and I ran from one baby to the other to the other in what felt like a constant race to make sure our son got enough sleep, our one daughter didn’t go hungry, and the other daughter wasn’t sick and in need of a return trip to the hospital.

  Even after we hired the nanny Cara, things didn’t get much better for a long time. Exhausted became a way of life for us, but when we had those few precious moments alone when we weren’t dead on our feet, Nina would curl up next to me in bed and lay her head on my chest and we’d talk about how each of the kids was unique and how we hoped they’d grow up to be successful in whatever they wanted to do.

  No matter how tired the babies made us, we couldn’t imagine life without them once they came along. Our life together grew more complicated by the day as they got older, and we wouldn’t have had it any other way.

  As I sat next to Nina watching her rest so peacefully, I had to smile. What we wouldn’t have given back then in those early days for a few days of solid sleep.

  “Dad, what are you smiling about?” Tressa asked, jolting me out of my memories.

  I looked up at her and shrugged. “Just thinking about when your mother and I finally got the three of you home from the hospital and how crazy those first weeks were.”

  “Three newborns all at one time sounds crazy. I don’t know how you and Mom did it.”

  For a moment, I tried to find the words to explain how we got through those days, but it wasn’t a matter of anything other than we had no other choice. “You do what you have to do, and we had to learn how to juggle three babies, a house, and my work.”

  “I guess I didn’t make it any easier being sick all the time,” Diana said apologetically. “That must have been hard.”

  “You weren’t always sick when you were a baby. You just joined us out at the house a little later than your brother and sister. But you were a good baby once we got the three of you on a schedule that didn’t resemble utter chaos. Now Ethan was another story,” I joked, nudging him in the side.

  “I know. I know. Mom has told me my whole life about not wanting to sleep once Diana came home. I say I was just trying to help by keeping an eye on her back then in the only way I could.”

  What he said was probably true. I’d always wondered if he and Diana had a closeness from even before they were born. Perhaps when she finally came home, he felt he needed to resume his watch over her. Even now, all these years later, he still protected her just like he had all his life.

  “If only you could have done that silently, we all could have gotten some sleep,” Tressa joked.

  “Ethan, the loud guardian angel,” he said with a smile.

  Pointing at Tressa, I said, “You refused to eat once your sister came home. We thought we finally got you on something resembling a schedule, and then once the three of you were together, that went up in smoke. Your mother and I used to say the three of you were conspiring to drive us nuts.”

  The three of them laughed, but back in those days, we were serious.

  “No kidding. We used to listen to the baby monitor to see if we could figure out if you three were communicating in secret. It sounds crazy now, but no sleep and an insane schedule will do that to you. You’ll see when you all become parents. It won’t sound so crazy then.”

  Each of them said the same thing in unison. “I don’t think I could handle three kids at the same time.”

  But that’s how things go sometimes. Nina and I were given three beautiful children, so we had no choice. We had to learn quickly to take care of them. We couldn’t let them down at the most important job either of us had ever had.

  “You do what you have to do. Like now, we have to be strong for your mother,” I said as I gently squeezed Nina’s hand and wished she would squeeze mine in return. “We’re going to be okay. This family has been through hard things before, and we’re still here. So don’t worry. Your mother’s strong.”

  We sat in silence around Nina’s bed and I hoped to God I’d just told my children the truth.

  “Mr. Stone, we need to take your wife upstairs for a while for some tests,” Dr. Rankin said from the doorway to the hospital room. “Are these your children?”

  Smiling, I stood and introduced them. “My son Ethan, my daughter Diana, who looks just like her mother, and my daughter Tressa. This is your mother’s doctor, Dr. Rankin.”

  He smiled and shook each of their hands and then said to Diana, “Isn’t genetics astounding? Your brother and sister are clearly twins, but you look like the spitting image of your mother.”

  “It’s even more astounding when you realize we’re triplets,” she said with a tiny giggle.

  Dr. Rankin’s expression showed how shocked he was to hear that. “Triplets? Your mother is certainly a strong woman if she gave birth to triplets. I promise she won’t be gone long.”

  “We’ll be right here when you get back, honey,” I whispered near her ea
r before pressing a soft kiss to her cheek.

  We all watched as two orderlies and a nurse wheeled her out of the room, leaving a gaping space between us. Without Nina, the room felt utterly empty.

  Without her, there was a hole in our family.

  “Why don’t we go down to the cafeteria and get some coffee?” Tressa suggested as she locked arms with Diana. “We can get something to eat, too.”

  “That way we won’t be gone when Mommy is here,” Diana said as they began to walk toward the door.

  But I didn’t want to leave that room just yet. I sat down on my chair and looked up at them. “I think I’m just going to sit for a little bit. Don’t worry about me. Take your time and eat something. I’m sure you’re all hungry. You go too, Ethan.”

  He forced a smile and turned to look at his sisters. “I’ll be right down. Just give me a couple minutes, okay?”

  “Okay. We’ll save you a seat,” Diana said before giving him a hug.

  Tressa and Diana walked out, leaving the two of us alone. I didn’t mind my son staying in Nina’s room with me. I didn’t need company, but he seemed like he wasn’t ready to go just yet, and I understood that.

  He sat down in the chair on the opposite side of where her bed had been, and as so often had happened in life, we looked at each other across the space that divided us. Still to that day, I looked at him in wonder at how much he looked like me. It was like looking in a mirror and seeing my past come to life in front of me.

  I knew he saw how similar we looked too. He’d heard it nearly every day of his life, so he was no doubt sick of being my near twin by now. I understood that. I never liked being compared to Taylor, and he had been a real twin, not one of my parents. In addition, I knew how it felt to be compared to your father all the time. Many stupid people had found me lacking compared to Victor Stone, and it pained me to know my son had endured the same type of comments.