Craving Molly

by Nicole Jacquelyn

  She only knew me.

  “You got Reb?” I asked Farrah as I pulled my knife out of the pocket of my jeans.

  “Yeah,” she said, slowly moving Reb to her lap. When Rebel didn’t protest, Farrah shot me a thumbs up.

  “I’m sorry,” Molly said as I flicked the blade open. “I’d hold her but my arm is—”

  “Can’t hold her when Will’s takin’ off that shirt,” Amy said simply. “Let Farrah take care of her for a bit. She’ll stay right there next to you.”

  I got to my knees in front of Molly and gingerly pulled the bottom of her scrub top away from her skin. I made the mistake of looking up at her face, and my hands began to shake.

  It wasn’t supposed to be like this. She wasn’t supposed to look at me with mixture of fear and relief in her eyes. It was wrong. All of it was wrong.

  “Should’ve just grabbed a pair of scissors,” Trix pointed out as I sliced through the shirt.

  “Too late now,” I shot back, dropping my knife on the floor so I could rip the shirt open the rest of the way. I wasn’t getting anywhere close to Molly’s breasts with a knife, it didn’t matter how good I was with it. Being good with a knife meant I was good at cutting people, not good at not cutting them.

  I pulled slowly and steadily until the shirt came completely apart, then stopped breathing.

  “That’s not as bad as I thought it would be,” my mom said in relief.

  “Me, either,” Amy said to Molly, stepping in beside me to help her pull the shirt down her arms. “But I’m sure it’s still painful as hell.”

  “I’ll live,” Molly replied, her eyes swollen into slits by then. Her face was swelling quickly and she was swaying on the bed.

  “Come on,” Amy said tenderly. As I got to my feet, Trix stepped forward and she and Amy helped Molly lay down on the bed.

  “Will?” Molly called frantically.

  “I’m right here, sugar,” I ground out, physically moving Trix out of my way so Molly could see me.

  “Keep Reb, okay? Call Mel.”

  “No problem,” I said easily, brushing her hair away from her face, being careful not to actually touch her skin. It looked like she’d been hit all over, and new spots seemed to be darkening into bruises the longer she was there.

  I stepped back as Amy shouldered her way in front of me. She spoke softly, but I still heard her words loud and clear in the room.

  “We need to take off those pants?”

  “No,” Molly answered firmly.

  I couldn’t see her face. I didn’t know if she didn’t want them to take the pants off because she didn’t want them to see her, or if there was no reason for them to come off. I gripped the back of my head as the muscles in my neck grew so taut I thought I’d choke. My mom’s hand landed softly on my back just as Amy breathed a sigh of relief.

  “Good,” she said, clearing her throat. “That’s good.”

  My entire body shuddered in relief.

  “I’ll go get a washcloth and some towels,” my mom announced, patting my back. “We need to get you cleaned up before you head to the hospital.”

  “The hospital?” I ground out as she moved around me.

  “She’s got a broken arm, Will,” Farrah scoffed. “You know how to set a broken arm?”

  “He’s not setting my arm,” Molly blurted from the bed. “No, baby. Reb, Mama’s arm has an owie, you can’t climb—”

  I stepped forward and plucked Rebel from the bed as she tried to crawl up her mom’s legs.

  “Hey, princess,” I said softly as I sat her on my forearm. “Mama’s busy. You want to hang out with me for a bit?”

  Rebel stared at me through a little pair of black glasses. I guessed she’d outgrown the purple rubbery ones she’d worn before. I wondered vaguely if Molly had kept them.

  “Will,” she said simply, tilting her head to the side.

  “Rebel,” I murmured back.

  She ran her hand down her neck, telling me she was thirsty. Yeah, even in the midst of all the bullshit, I was pretty damn proud I understood her still.

  “Hey, Moll?” I called softly, watching Rebel as her gaze moved around the room. “Reb’s thirsty, so I’m gonna take her to get something to drink.”

  “Okay,” she mumbled, her voice faint. The women were helping her get cleaned up, their quiet voices soothing, but I just wanted all of them to leave so I could see Molly’s face. I wanted to take care of her. I wanted everyone to leave so I could lock us in my room. Just us. Me, Molly and Rebel.

  I jerked in surprise then went completely still as little fingers burrowed into my beard. Oh, God. I’d missed them.

  Chapter 15

  Molly

  “I was wondering why you hadn’t shown up toni—” Doctor Lewin’s words cut off as he looked up from my chart.

  I moved my head to the side and shrugged my sore shoulders. “Hey, Mike.”

  “What the hell happened?” he said, taking in my bruised face and hurt arm.

  “Four wheeler accident,” I said flatly, holding his gaze as his eyebrows lifted in disbelief.

  Will shifted in his seat, and Mike’s head jerked toward him in surprise. I guess he hadn’t noticed Will and Amy when he’d walked into the room, which was believable. He tended to have a one-track mind when it came to his job, and if he wasn’t working on someone, he didn’t even acknowledge them.

  “That’s Will and Amy,” I said, pulling Mike’s gaze back to mine.

  “I’d like to speak with Molly in private,” Mike directed at my posse, making me snort.

  “Ms. Duncan,” Will said darkly.

  “What?”

  “She’s your patient, she’s Ms. Duncan.”

  “Will, knock it off,” I interrupted. If my eyes hadn’t felt like they were going to fall out of my head at any moment, I would have rolled them. “Let’s just get this over with. Will isn’t going to leave and my arm is killing me.”

  “It’s definitely broken,” Mike said as he moved closer to the bed. “I can see that from here.”

  “No shit, Sherlock,” I mumbled, hissing as he gently lifted my arm.

  “Ah, now that you’re a patient, you can give me shit, huh?” Mike asked in amusement as Will got to his feet. I could practically see the wheels turning in his head as I met his eyes and glared. I didn’t need him hovering, and he could shove any misplaced jealousy he had up his ass.

  “I always give you shit,” I shot back at Mike, not looking away from Will.

  “And that’s why you’re my favorite nurse,” Mike replied. He had no idea how close he was to having his ass handed to him. Amy put her hand on Will’s side and said something quietly to him, making him sit back down.

  “You say that to all the nurses,” I replied as Mike laid my arm back in my lap.

  He checked out the rest of my injuries briskly, but I could tell that he was worried. He was playing it cool, but he wasn’t convinced that I was telling the truth, and I was pretty sure that having a biker and an old hippie in my room didn’t help matters. They stood out like sore thumbs.

  “Let’s get you down to X-ray and see what we’re working with,” Mike said finally. “It looks like the rest of this stuff is superficial.”

  I’d already figured that much out myself. After Will and Trix had taken Rebel to get something to drink earlier, the women had helped me change and cleaned up all of my little cuts and bruises. There had been shockingly little damage done, even though it felt like I’d been hit by a truck. I’d felt almost embarrassed after they’d cleaned me up and we’d seen how bad the damage wasn’t. The man who’d hit me had hands the size of baseball gloves, so he had to have been holding back, at least until he’d broken my arm.

  When I’d apologized for the fuss, the women had looked at me like I’d lost my mind. Then Amy said something I’d never forget. “A woman lives in fear every day of her life that a man will use his strength against her. It’s an intrinsic truth. It’s not even a conscious thought, that fear, just basic insti
nct. It’s why we double-check locks and search dark parking lots as we walk to our cars at night. Your level of injury does not change the fact that what you feared has come to pass. You were hurt by someone bigger and stronger than you. Every woman in this room has been there. You’re not alone.”

  She was surprisingly well-spoken.

  “Won’t a nurse take me to X-ray?” I asked as Mike kicked the brake off the bed I was in.

  “I’m already here, I can take you,” he replied easily, making me cringe. He was going to grill me. Everyone in the room knew it.

  “I’ll go with you,” Amy said softly, dropping her purse in Will’s lap with a thunk.

  We left Will sitting in the chair by the window, and I closed my eyes as I was wheeled down the hall. I was sitting up in the bed, but the fluorescent lights on the ceiling still made me dizzy as we worked our way down the corridor. I was putting up a good front, but my stomach churned with nerves the longer we were at the hospital. I needed to know if they’d found my dad. I had to know if he was okay. Since the moment I’d known that Rebel was safe, he’d been all I could think about.

  “You have anything you want to tell me?” Mike asked as he pushed me into the X-ray room.

  “I told you what happened,” I replied tiredly as he moved briskly around the room. “I crashed the four wheeler I was riding.”

  “Since when did you start riding four wheelers?” His voice dropped in disbelief as he stopped in front of me.

  “Today,” I said with a smirk, my split lip protesting the movement. “Why do you think I crashed?” He opened his mouth to argue, but whatever he was about to say was cut off by the tech coming in, asking Amy to leave if there was any chance of her being pregnant.

  * * *

  Two hours later, I was drowsily leaning my head against the back window of Amy’s car as we headed back to the clubhouse. I hadn’t heard any news from the guys who’d gone over to check on my dad. I was pretty sure Will had been in contact with them, but he hadn’t said a word to me and I was too afraid to ask him. He’d really only given me updates on how Rebel was doing with his mom.

  “Boys are back,” Amy said as we pulled in the gates. “Looks like Patrick waited for me, too.”

  “Like he’d leave without ya,” Will teased as we came to a stop behind a long line of motorcycles. “You two are connected at the hip.”

  “Zip it,” Amy ordered, putting the car in park. “And help Molly inside.”

  “I don’t need help!” I called to her as she climbed out, ignoring me. “I don’t need your help,” I said again when Will hopped out of the front seat and opened my door.

  “That’s how it is, then?” he asked, falling into step beside me as I made my way slowly toward the front door.

  “How what is?” I snapped. I didn’t know why I was so irritated. He’d been nothing but nice to me since I’d shown up at their party.

  “Me and you.”

  “There is no me and you,” I said, coming to a stop.

  “There’s always gonna be a me and you,” he argued, stepping toward me.

  “Is that why you threw us away?” I blurted incredulously. “You have a funny way of showing your devotion.”

  “You told me to leave!” he yelled, his brows pulled together in confusion.

  “You left a week before that!” I hissed back. “You acted like a pussy and disappeared instead of telling me you were done!”

  “I wasn’t done!”

  “Bullshit. You took off and didn’t answer a text or a phone call. I was freaking out, Will! I wasn’t sleeping, I could barely eat because I was so worried about that surgery.”

  “Everything okay out here?” Will’s dad asked from the doorway.

  I ignored him.

  “Oh, wait. You didn’t care about that, right? Because Rebel is my kid. It’s not your responsibility to give a shit.” I swayed on my feet and Will reached out to grab me. “Don’t touch me,” I ordered, turning to face Grease as his presence finally registered. “Did you find my dad?”

  “We did,” he said with a somber nod.

  I didn’t know what that meant. I couldn’t read the man’s expression. He didn’t even have one. His face was completely blank. I tried to take a step forward, but my feet couldn’t seem to move. I glanced down at them in confusion and that’s when everything went black.

  I woke up in Will’s darkened bedroom, the sounds of the club faint through the walls. Barely opening my eyes, I caught sight of a darkened shape lounging across the foot of the bed and instantly knew who it was.

  “Did I seriously faint?” I asked groggily, rolling gingerly toward Will. Someone had tucked me in, and the heavy blankets were surprisingly nice.

  “Yep.”

  I waited for him to say something else, anything else. But like always, when I needed Will to speak, he was silent.

  “My dad?” I asked hoarsely.

  “I’m sorry, Moll,” he murmured back.

  No.

  I tried frantically to respond. I knew he was watching me, waiting for a reaction, but I didn’t have any words. I just lay there, my heart pounding as I tried to untangle the thoughts running through my head. Memories of my dad, his tattooed arms flexing as he lifted me up, carrying me after I was way too old to demand he did. The way he’d pull off his glasses and dig his fingers into his eye sockets as he laughed at some harebrained scheme I’d come up with. His face in the delivery room when I’d had Rebel, white as a ghost, but so damn proud.

  The way he walked. The way he laughed. The way he clammed up whenever my mom was mentioned. The way he would always sheepishly put a shirt on when I had a friend over. The scar on his ribs where he’d been stabbed in a bar fight before I was born. My name tattooed over his heart. Rebel’s name tattooed down the middle of his chest. The time he’d grown his hair out. The time he’d asked me to shave it off and I’d left bald patches and he’d had to wear a hat for a solid month. The laugh lines at the corners of his eyes. The frown lines between his brows. The way he called me princess.

  The look in his eyes the last time I’d seen him.

  The look in his eyes the last time I’d seen him.

  The look in his eyes the last time I’d seen him.

  “Molly,” Will barked, flipping on the light.

  I’d known it before he’d told me, known it before I’d ever left that house. But still, somewhere inside me, I’d held out hope that Grease and the other guys would get to him in time. I’d been delusional, and I’d known it, but I’d still had that hope.

  And now that hope was gone, leaving a deep, dark hole in its place.

  “Molly,” Will said again, ripping the bedding down my body. “Answer me.”

  I stared at him blankly as he pulled me out of bed.

  “I’m fine,” I mumbled incoherently as he lifted me into his arms.

  “Mom!” Will called as he carried me into a dimly lit hallway. He walked quickly through an archway that had chips in the paint and some sort of writing all over it, and then we were in a loud room with people everywhere.

  “Will?” An old man with a long, red beard laced with silver stepped in front of us.

  “I think she’s in shock,” Will told him in a tone I’d never heard before.

  “She’s earned it, poor lass.”

  “I need—she needs—”

  “Probably just you,” the man said softly, reaching out to pat my shoulder. “Take her back in your room and care for her.”

  “Will?” another voice asked from behind me. “I didn’t realize you were here.”

  “Poor timing, girl,” the old man said.

  I turned my head to the side and found the woman I’d seen with Will at the gas station staring at us in confusion. Oddly, I didn’t even care.

  “Go on, now,” the old man said to her, waving his hand. “Shoo.”

  I dropped my head to the side and rested it on Will’s chest.

  “You seen my parents?” Will asked, settling me more firmly in his a
rms.

  “Over by the pool table with the kids,” the old man answered.

  Then we were moving again, shuffling around people as Will carried me across the room. He hadn’t said anything to the woman, hadn’t acknowledged her at all.

  “Oh, Molly,” Mrs. Hawthorne said sadly when we finally reached her. “It’s going to be okay, sweetheart.”

  “I don’t know what to do,” Will said quietly.

  “I do,” Grease mumbled gruffly. “Hold her tight.”

  I turned my head just as he set a familiar weight on the curve of my body.

  “Mama,” Rebel said in relief, leaning forward to rest against my chest. “Mama. Reb.”

  I shuddered, a sob bursting out of my mouth. I pulled her in tight, ignoring the way her heavy weight put painful pressure on my arm. “Hello, princess,” I blubbered, kissing her head. “I missed you.”

  “Take them back to your room,” Mrs. Hawthorne ordered Will. “They need to get some rest.”

  “Are you sure?” I asked quietly, meeting Grease’s eyes.

  “Yeah,” he said simply, not asking me to clarify. “He fought like hell, though. Took one of the fuckers with him.”

  “Which one?” I mumbled through numb lips.

  “Tall. Dark hair.”

  “Okay.” That was the guy who’d held me. The other big guy had light hair, almost blonde.

  Will carried us back through the room while I held Reb snug against my chest. She was smoothing her fingers through my hair repeatedly, humming a song that only she knew. I wondered if the events of the day would mark her somehow, or if for once, her inattention would work in our benefit.

  Oh, who was I kidding? Rebel was never truly inattentive. She saw everything. She just didn’t respond the way other kids would. Rebel might not freak out in a way that any other parent would notice, but she’d be fighting her own demons somehow. I pressed my lips against the top of her head as Will carried us through the door to his room, thankful that she was letting me hold her at all.

  “Trix bought some Pull-Ups earlier,” Will said as he set us down on the bed. He stood there awkwardly as Rebel climbed off my lap and laid down against his pillow.