Addicted to the Alien

by Sabrina Kade

  I steal a look up at Wix. “What do you think, brother? Would you follow?”

  He nods immediately. “Of course.”

  “Me too,” Dolan says quickly.

  “What?” Layla snaps. “You’d spy on me?”

  “If you were in the talas with Chocal? Of course, I would! I do not trust him.”

  Fury pounds against my skull. I have not only committed one wrong but two. I took pleasure. And now, I don’t know the location of my female. She can say that she does not belong to me all she likes, but in my mind? Arizona is mine.

  I am the one to protect her. I am the one who should look after her.

  “Do you want to go after her, brother?” Wixlass asks.

  “She’ll never forgive you if you’re following her for no reason,” Layla says, adding to my confusion.

  “And if Chocal is up to something?” Dolan shoots back. “Would you not want me there to protect you?”

  She has no answer. It is an awkward position to be in. Arizona does not see me as her mate, but she belongs to me. I have no reason to follow her except for my distrust of Chocal. And it seems I am not alone in this concern. I don’t need Arizona to accept me as her mate for me to feel protective of her. Despite her strength, she is fragile, and Chocal is one of the larger males I have seen in my existence. If he wants to steal pleasure from her, it will not take much effort for him to do so.

  And then what would happen? Could I ever forgive myself?

  Would I rather live with the guilt of following her without permission, or the guilt of not following her when I could have prevented something terrible from happening?

  I decide I’d rather deal with Arizona’s wrath over panicking over nothing.

  “I will check on her,” I say firmly. “To make sure Chocal is not doing anything wrong. I trust Arizona. But I don’t trust him.”

  “Exactly,” Dolan says, stepping away from his mate to clap his hand on my shoulder. “Prince Korben may have welcomed him, but that is only because even Chocal is not stupid enough to try and steal his mate.”

  “Steal his mate?” Layla asks. “Who said anything about stealing a mate?”

  “Layla,” Dolan says. “This is a male’s pride. His devotion to his female. And I will say, I would not care how angry you would become with me, you would not be going anywhere with an unmated male without me.”

  Layla blusters but doesn’t argue with him.

  I love my brothers. I always have. Though I do not come from as wealthy a line as so many of them here, they have all welcomed me on Hethdiss. They cared not that I was a lothid. They cared not that I would be more likely to serve drinks at the galas they attended than stand beside them. Here, we are on equal terms, other than with Prince Korben, of course, who without him, we would all be struggling to survive. My brothers do not judge me for wanting to Choose a female who may not wish to Choose me. They support my urge to protect her.

  It is a good feeling to be amongst family who I can trust.

  Dolan and Wixlass follow me back to the lair as I gather a few belongings to take with me. For some reason, I reach for a spare pair of shorts and tuck them into the back of mine. Dolan recommends a shirt in case I must head further north, and though the words make me nervous, I do as he says. The longer Arizona is gone, and the more I think about Layla’s careless words about her possibly being with Chocal, the more nervous I become. Luckily, my brothers are there to keep me calm. Even Cade and Dash stop by with their mates at their sides, eyes wide as they realize what I’m doing.

  “Where’s Arizona?” Kansas asks, eyes darting around my lair.

  “Never you mind, female,” Dolan snaps at her.

  This is mostly my fault, but I long to put some of the blame on her anyway, so I don’t hiss at Dolan. This particular female called my female weak.

  “Do not worry, Kansas. I will find her and bring her back safely.”

  “Wait, what?” the shorter yellow-haired one asks. Dakota. “Is something going on? Where is she?”

  I turn slowly. “I am not sure. She said strange words to me when she departed our lair this suns rising, and one of the females thinks she saw her with Chocal.”

  “Chocal?” Dash sounds angry. “Your mate spends time with him?”

  “She’s not his mate,” Kansas says. “And if she’s stupid enough to spend time with Chocal, then maybe she’ll get what’s coming to her—” The words die in her throat as I advance on her. Dash snarls, but I merely bat his arm away as though it were nothing but a tylis branch.

  “You shut your mouth right now, female,” I hiss. Her lips part, and close. “I am more than willing to take the blame for her disappearance. And her friendship with Chocal. But I will not have you say any cruel words to or about her. Arizona is a good female. She is strong even when she surrounds herself with others who are weak. You are weak. You said cruel words to my mate. Is this how you show gratitude for all she has done for you?”

  She swallows, her eyes wide. “You don’t know the whole story.”

  “I know more than you think,” I hiss.

  “Get away from my female,” Dash hisses. “She is mine.”

  “As Arizona is mine,” I hiss back, stepping away from the mouthy dirty faced female, nonetheless. I move away from my lair, heading toward the main opening with a pack of my brothers and their mates on my heels. I cannot think about my anger with Kansas. My fault. I must remember that this is all my fault. Arizona is gone because of me. And though Arizona thinks that Kansas does not like or respect her, I know that she is following me closely behind.

  “What are you doing to do?” Wixlass asks. “Do you know what direction they were headed?”

  “Of course, I don’t. But someone must have seen them.” I spin, staring at Dolan and his mate. “Where did they go?”

  Layla frowns. “I don’t know directions around here.”

  I fight the urge to snarl and focus on Dolan. “Dilewiler territory? Exer’s clearing? Tell me they weren’t headed toward the Great Cliff.”

  Dolan shakes his head. “I can’t say for sure, brother, but I believe they headed north.”

  I stop in my tracks. “North?”

  “That’s where Chocal spent his time,” he says with a shrug. “Maybe he was planning to show her his old dwelling?”

  “Or the hot springs?” Exer’s mate offers quietly.

  “Scheita!” I roar. “The hot springs?”

  Wixlass cocks an eyebrow. “You think?”

  “It would make sense,” Kansas offers quietly. “She’s always liked stuff like that. She had a rough upbringing, but I remember her mentioning one of the places she stayed at… the neighbors had a hot tub—”

  “Yes, that makes sense,” Dakota mutters. “Oh God, I hope she’s okay. That Chocal guy wouldn’t hurt her, would he?”

  “I don’t know,” I say, not wanting to lie. “I can track their scent if it hasn’t already faded.” I stop at the opening of the central lair and dart my tongue from my lips. Thankfully, her scent isn’t old. “I taste her,” I say in a low voice.

  There’s a rumble of relief through the small crowd behind me.

  “Seriously,” a voice says, startling me. Kansas is now standing right beside me. “Is this my fault?”

  “Of course it is,” I hiss, and she backs away.

  “But,” I relent, holding up my hand before Dash springs. “It is also mine. I have failed her as a male.”

  “W-what?” Kansas sounds genuinely shocked. “You? You could never fail her. You’re a decent guy. If she left for any reason, I’m sure it’s because of me—”

  “No,” I grumble. “I messed this up. I acted like every male she’s ever known—”

  “That’s not true!” Dakota yelps, stepping beside Kansas. “No. That’s not true at all. You’re good to Arizona.”

  “You’re good for her, too,” Kansas says. “I just… I guess I pushed too hard.”

  I frown, not exactly wanting to deal with any of this. I wish
Arizona could hear their words. How much these females care about their leader. If she knew how they felt, she probably wouldn’t have gone off with Chocal. Or maybe she still would have. After all, I still think I’m the reason she left with him in the first place.

  “I will tell her when I see her, how worried you were,” I say in a low voice, staring down at the two wide-eyed females. “I will find her and say these words, but you must do a favor for me.”

  “If anything’s happened to her and you bring her back safe? Anything,” Dakota says.

  “Name it,” says Kansas.

  “Say these words to her because she needs to hear them occasionally. Actions of kindness are well and all right, but she needs to hear them. I believe that’s part of the reason she may be with Chocal. She longs for kind words. You will tell her what you told me when she returns, yes?”

  Dakota nods. “Yeah, sure,” Kansas says. “Just bring our girl back.”

  “Hopefully we’re not just overreacting.”

  I nod and make sure that my shirt and spare pair of shorts are secure before heading in the direction Dolan pointed out. Wixlass keeps stride with me for a little while but eventually falls behind. I look over my shoulder and wave, but I notice that most of them are wearing a different expression. What is that? Horror? Shock? Surprise? Whatever it is, I do not like it. Have I forgotten something? I’m about to ask when Layla motions for me to turn around. And when I do, I swear my hearts stop.

  Chocal is back.

  And Chocal is alone.

  ***

  I didn’t know Chocal on the fatherland. Honestly, I’m not sure if he comes from a tothid, mithid, or even a lothid line like mine. He’s large, but that means nothing. And though it’s warm and the sky is clear, he’s still clad in a black shirt to match his shorts. His eyes widen when I stride toward him, but it quickly shifts.

  “Drozass?” he has the nerve to sound surprised. “What are you doing here? Celebrating some human holiday? I see you are not alone—”

  “Where is she?” I hiss, reaching for his shirt. But he quickly dodges, jumping to the side.

  “Pardon? Who is she?”

  “You know! Arizona! Where is she! They said she was with you.”

  “Who said?” Chocal holds up his hands. “As you can see, I am alone. Why do you attack me like this? Have you lost track of your mate?”

  “She’s not my mate.”

  “Indeed, otherwise, you would not have lost track of her.”

  He goes to step around me, but I don’t believe him. Not for an instant. I block his path, and though he is a hand and a half taller than me, he doesn’t fight or force his way around me. He shouldn’t bother. Here, he only has to deal with me. If he tries returning to the second lair, there are plenty more waiting to interrogate him. “I did not lose track of her,” I hiss. “And I think you do know where she is.”

  His dull, golden eyes widen. For a moment, I swear he’s about to confess, but then his expression settles back into that smooth, overly calm look that I hate. “She is not with me,” he says in a low voice. “And seeing as that she is not my mate; I feel no need to keep track of her.”

  “She is not with you now, but I think she was. Where did you take her?”

  He narrows his eyes, mulling over his next response. “I didn’t take her anywhere she didn’t want to go. If someone asks me to point them in a direction, I’m not exactly in the right to say, no, am I?”

  My hands begin to tremble. He knows. He was with her. And yet, he’s acting as though he’s completely innocent. I’m barely able to keep my senses as I stare up at him. “Where did you direct her to?”

  “She needed time to think.”

  “Where. Did. You. Send. Arizona?” I hiss.

  “I don’t have to tell you anything. She said this trip was for her. She didn’t want anyone to know.” He shrugs. “Maybe if you and she were mated she would have asked you to join her. As it was, she wanted to take a personal retreat. I merely pointed her in the right direction.”

  “And what direction is that?”

  He holds up his hands. “Easy there, I’m not looking to start drama. If you are that worried about her, I will tell you. She wanted to visit the hot springs.”

  My expression drops from anger to horror. “You sent her north? Alone?” My arm drops and Chocal quickly steps past me. But not before he says in a low voice.

  “Don’t worry, brother. She’ll be well taken care of.”

  He’s almost entirely out of reach before I regain my senses and grab his arm. A pained cry escapes his lips, and my brothers come rushing toward us, concern and anger written upon their faces.

  “What is this?” Chentan asks. “Brother, release him!”

  “He sent her to the hot springs!” I hiss. “He sent her north! Alone!”

  “What?” Chentan shoots an accusing glare in Chocal’s direction. “What are you up to?”

  He struggles in my grasp. “Oh, relax. I told Drozass already. She’ll be well taken care of. Now, would you please let me go? She’s not your mate, Drozass. You had your chance, and you couldn’t get her to Choose you. Why not let someone else try?”

  My hearts shatter. “What did you say?”

  “I said,” he coos, “why don’t you let someone else try? If she just so happens to meet someone on her way to the hot springs and they hit it off, who are you to stop it? Let her go, Drozass.”

  I pull him closer, fighting the urge to spar him right in his smug face, but some primal instinct warns me not to. But I’m still angry. Beyond angry. And Chocal looks so calm about the whole thing. “You didn’t send her to the hot springs. You sent her to one of your brothers. One of the outsiders.”

  “So what if I did?” Chocal asks, never losing that easy-going expression, despite so many others surrounding him with fury written across their faces. “She wasn’t happy here. She wasn’t happy with any of you. She deserves better.”

  “What’s in it for you?” Chentan asks, stepping closer. “You sold out one of our females. For what? What will you receive in return? Prince Korben will hear about this and—”

  “Don’t worry about what I will receive.” He grins back, and finally, my grip loosens enough that he’s able to pull free. I’m still in a state of shock as he gathers himself, and steps away. “Scheita, though. I wasn’t expecting you all to have this figured out by the time I returned. I can’t exactly stay here now, can I?”

  And just like that, he spins on his heel and turns in a different direction.

  I can’t even move. He’s not heading north. Not toward my Arizona.

  He doesn’t matter.

  “We’ll get him,” Chentan shouts, clapping me hard on the shoulder and shaking me from my stupor. “Go. Locate your female.”

  “We’ll deal with Chocal,” Dolan says, already sprinting in his direction. “Go now.”

  “Please,” Dakota gasps. “Save her.”

  “Yes.” Kansas’ voice cracks with emotion. “Bring her back.”

  And that’s when I snap, and panic works its way through my chest. Chocal betrayed Arizona. Betrayed her trust. She doesn’t give it easily, and now she may end up the plaything of a very, desperate outsider who may still believe in the practices of the fatherland. Just the idea of someone stealing pleasure from her… not asking… making her think pleasure is her only purpose. All she’s intended to provide. No. I can’t have that.

  I am different. I’m not like those males. I’ll never treat her that way. And though I may have made a mistake before when I didn’t offer to pleasure her after she pleased me, I’ll never make that same mistake again. I know I’m different. I’ll worship Arizona like the goddess she is.

  I love her.

  I want her.

  I need her.

  And I need to bring her back so I can prove to her that I’m worth Choosing.

  Not wasting another moment, I sprint toward the direction of the hot springs, hoping to Goddess that I’m not too late.


  I’ll never forgive myself otherwise.

  Chapter Twelve

  Arizona

  I am genuinely and royally fucked. And I have no one to blame but myself.

  For once, I can truly see how this is my fault. As soon as Chocal steered me from the main path away from the lairs, I suspected something was off. The suns were already beginning to set, but he was confident in his lies, saying I didn’t have anything to worry about. I remember how I glanced back and second-guessed everything. But I didn’t want to be weak. So despite all my reservations, I followed him through the increasing darkness.

  “You are going to enjoy the hot springs,” Chocal said, smiling over his shoulder. “The water is clear, and you will finally have the time you so desperately need to think. And when you return you can decide if Drozass is the right male for you.”

  “I already know the answer to that,” I said, even surprising myself as Chocal tread further into the woods. The weather felt strange, the air cooler, and less humid. It would have been pleasant if not for the ever-growing seed of worry in the pit of my stomach.

  “You think you know the answer,” he said, falling back a few steps to fall in stride beside me. “But you do not know what else is out there. There could be a male that could be perfect for you.”

  I chuckled. “I highly doubt that. I’ve met all the males.”

  “Not all of them,” he said darkly, picking up his pace. “Males are abundant on Hethdiss, you know. Stronger than the ones who depend so heavily on Prince Korben and his father’s connections. He has made life more comfortable, but not every male seeks out comfort. Some search for other ways to be strong. Doesn’t that appeal to you, Arizona?”

  My eyes widened. “More males? H-how many?”

  “Three or four more hands. They have scattered.”

  My breath hitched. Three or four hands. Which means fifteen or twenty more males wandering around Hethdiss. Males I’ve never seen before. And though this piece of information was fascinating at the time, I remember how my skin crawled. “I would be happiest with Drozass. He is a good match for me.”